Life Love and the Pursuit of Lily
by Valkyrie3
Summary: A story about Lily and James' sixth and seventh years and ultimately how they got together.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: It all belongs to J.K. Rowling I'm just glad I get to play around in her world a little.

Authors Note

Here goes chapter 1... it's kind of mushy in parts but it sets up the story, so enjoy!

Life Love and the Pursuit of Lily

Lily Evans began the summer of sixth year just as she had the four summers before it. She met her parents at the train station and from there journeyed home to the muggle neighborhood in which she had grown up.

Her room hadn't changed at all; in fact it even smelled the same. The pictures of her friends still littered the walls and she presumed the same piles of junk were still stacked underneath her bed. She had just gotten into her regular routine of running in the morning and reading and doing summer homework in the afternoon when one day out of the blue a large black owl delivered a letter for her.

"Lily." Her mother called up the stairs.

"Yes?"

"There's mail for you honey."

The fifteen year old red-head appeared at the foot of the stairs a minute later. She thanked her mother who handed her the letter and watched as her mum went about busying herself with babying the big black owl that had delivered it.

"Oh I do love it when you get letters Lily. Look at him. Isn't he just beautiful?"

Lily smiled at her loving that Rose Evans was so intrigued by the magical world.

"He's gorgeous mum." She replied sitting down at the breakfast table as she tore open her letter.

She read it to herself not really believing what she was seeing.

_Dear Lily,_

_I have officially started to write you at least ten times now and I still don't think I quite got it right but Sirius insisted I send what I wrote to you this time, I think he got tired of me wasting so much parchment. _

_I know I'm the last person you probably want to hear from but hear me out before you go burning this letter okay? I know I act like a complete prat sometimes…probably all the time to you… and I know that what happened at the end of the year after our OWL's was completely uncalled for on my part. You were totally right about me that day and nearly all the days before it too. _

_So here's the thing. I know I've acted like a jerk and a complete idiot but I'm going to try and make it better. I'm going to try and be better… for you. _

_I know you think I ask you out and bother you for some stupid form of amusement but honestly… it's not about that. _

_Since the moment I saw you first year at the train station I knew you were something special. And originally my picking on you was to get your attention (I know, I know I was a ridiculous and misguided eleven year old you don't have to say it!) but from then on it sort of turned into the only way I could get you to talk to me or notice me at all. So even though I let it go on for way too long, a lot of how I acted around you was because I sort of screwed up from the beginning by making you dislike me. I'm sorry about that. You have no idea how sorry. _

_And now, after the incident with Severus, I feel I need to fix things between you and me. I know you probably won't ever see me the way I've seen you for the past…well at least three years, but I don't want us to go through the last two years of school with you hating me and me acting like a prat, either to you or others, to get you to give me the time of day. _

_I guess you are probably thinking you'll believe it when you see it but I swear it's true. I'm going to change. No more picking on anyone who doesn't deserve it or acting like an arrogant prick. I promise from here on out I'll be someone you would be willing to call a friend. And I am going to let you get to know me as the person I am and not the person I've been acting like. _

_So here goes nothing…_

_My name is James Michael Potter. I am almost sixteen years old. I like quidditch, running, reading (I know shocker right?), swimming, okay well anything that has to do with sports, chess and most animals (ever since I met Ms. Norris I'm sorry to say I'm sort of prejudiced against cats now). I have three really great friends who I would do anything for. My parents are both involved in the ministry. Dad is an Auror and Mum works for the Department of Magical Games and Sports._

_If there's anything else you want to know…Just ask. Please._

_Yours,_

_James_

_P.S. The thing I love the most about you today…_

_The fact that you were willing to read this letter from beginning to end …and take it seriously._

Lily sat the letter down in front of her not knowing what to think. Could he really mean it? Could he actually change that much…and for her? Did he actually like her for real? For the first time in five years she wondered if maybe James Potter was serious when he said he wanted to go out with her. Maybe it wasn't all a joke to him. She sighed wondering just how much she could trust him.

Over the past five years of school together James had shown himself to be an arrogant bully. Lily frowned recalling all the times James had hexed innocent bystanders or embarrassed others just for the fun of it. The scene at the lake at the end of their O.W.L's was the epitome of his bullying toward Severus and Lily just couldn't fathom James ever changing.

As she watched her mother playing with James' owl she wondered whether or not she should even reply. Her mind was racing with the possibilities of what could happen if she did reply or if she didn't. She debated on writing to her friends, Dorcas Meadows, Marlene MacKinnon and Alice Prewitt to see if they had any ideas but suddenly decided against it.

"Hey mum," she said suddenly surprising herself as the words came out of her mouth. "I'm going to go upstairs and reply to this letter. Would you mind keeping track of that owl for me until I get back?"

"Of course not honey. We're getting along just fine." Her mother replied feeding the owl another of the treats she kept in the bag next to the toaster.

Lily sprinted up the stairs and soon found herself sitting down and writing out the first thing that came to her head.

_James,_

_What sort of books do you like to read? What are your parents' names? And how long have you known Sirius, Remus and Peter?_

_I am going to do my best to take you seriously in this. I just don't know how much I can trust you. You've been pretty awful these past five years you know? I really hope you meant what you wrote and I suppose I'll just have to hope for the best._

_Thanks for writing._

_Lily_

_P.S. Why does it matter so much to you what I think?_

She looked the letter over wondering if she had finally gone stark raving mad. Before she could change her mind and consider having her mother take her to the nearest psychiatric specialist, she rushed down the stairs and sent the letter off with the owl.

She got an answer the next day,

_Lily,_

_Thanks for writing back. It means a lot._

_As far as reading goes, I like a lot of things. I've read Shakespeare and Hemingway, Dickens, Poe, Frost, Kipling, Tolkein (Intersting from a Wizard Perspective), Austin, Price, Magorium, Lostwithian, Bones, Gryffindor, Merlin and lots more of the classics (both muggle and wizard). I like to read pretty much anything though but I'm partial to the aforementioned authors and mysteries or thrillers or action-adventure. Not that romance is off-limits I just… have to be in the right mood you know? (At least I listed Austen right?)_

_My parents' names are Charlotte and Jason. They're great. Really. I mean whenever Sirius has trouble at home he comes here and they look after him no questions asked. It would be better I think, if he were to live here I mean. They can do a lot more for him than his own mum and dad and I know they care more about him._

_Sirius, Remus, Peter and I all met the first day of school. I knew of Sirius of course from my parents knowing his parents, since we are both purebloods, but I hadn't met him until that first day on the train. We all pretty much hit it off right from the beginning. Since then we've sort of been inseparable, obviously. We realized that together we didn't really have any limits and that we could be or do anything we wanted. It sounds corny I know but well…we've sort of never let go of that mentality._

_Today they were all over and we spent the day out by the lake at my house. I think sometimes they wonder what is wrong with me. They don't understand why I've spent the last five years only thinking of you. Don't take that the wrong way though. They think you are wonderful really they do… They just don't understand why I've never looked elsewhere since you never seemed to feel the same way. But doing that never felt right._

_Anyway, sorry for rambling, I just wanted to say I hope your summer is going well so far and I hope you write back again soon. And please if there is anything else you want to know ask away!_

_Yours,_

_James_

_P.S. The thing I love most about you today…_

_You never cease to surprise and amaze me. Never._

Suddenly, with the contents of just those two letters as motivation, Lily Evans found herself in a written relationship with James Potter. Before she knew it they were exchanging at least a letter a day, sometimes more than that. She learned more about James than she had ever thought possible and somewhere along the way her opinion of him began to change. She even began to share her own thoughts with him. Toward the end of the summer she began to notice that his letters were becoming more and more private. He was sharing things with her that she wouldn't have imagined he could, things that meant something to him. In one letter he said,

_Sometimes I think about what it will be like when I die. Will I die for something meaningful? Or will I die an old man having lived my life to the fullest?_

_Most of the time I hope that it is the latter. I want to live my life to a ridiculously old age, my wife and children and grandchildren surrounding me. I would love every minute of that life. Every single minute I was given with the love of my life and the children we had together. I would cherish that life and cherish my family because they would mean the world to me. They would be worth any sacrifice I could possibly make if it meant they were happy._

_Then I sometimes think about everything that has been happening lately. More and more dark magic has been cropping up and Voldemort continues to create a name for himself. When I think about that I start considering what it would mean to give my life for a purpose greater than myself. If I could save people… or die for a cause that truly means something to the world at large, or to you, maybe that would be just as preferable._

Lily was amazed by these sorts of sentiments when he included them. He was truly giving his thoughts over to her. It was a strange feeling to know that James trusted her with such private information about himself.

She also began to notice the change in the way he started and ended his letters. The beginning went from just saying simply_ Lily _to saying _Dearest Lily, Lily love_ and _My Lily._ The ending took a similar turn. While the P.S. always included a line about what he loved the most about her that day his salutation was altered. It changed from _Yours, James_ at the beginning of the summer to _Forever Yours, Yours with all my Heart, Yours Eternally _and finally to_ With All the Love I Have, James._

She found she didn't know how to react to that aspect of his letters. She wasn't sure she wanted him to write them but at the same time she didn't really know if she had a problem with it either because she knew that much of the time he was a jokester and the endings could be just another interesting aspect of his personality. At least that's what she hoped. She was definitely sincerely and completely confused by the end of the summer.

Then she received his last letter on August 31st

_My Lily,_

_Tomorrow is the first day of term. I'm more nervous than I've ever been in my life and it's all because I know I will see you._

_I guess this is the start of my getting to "Show" you how I've changed. I hope you see it._

_This whole summer has seemed sort of unreal. I mean in all my craziest dreams I never actually expected you to respond to my letters the way you have. I almost feel like you know things about me Sirius doesn't even know. (Please don't tell him I said that, he'll pout for days and then demand to know what you know about me that he doesn't.)_

_If things don't go how I want them to I need to tell you now…_

_Thankyou, for being the most amazing and wonderfully understanding person I have ever had the privilege to know. You mean more to me than I can put down in words. And if that is too heavy and ridiculously sentimental for you, thankyou for becoming a true friend to me this summer._

_I will see you on the train tomorrow._

_Yours Forever and Always,_

_James_

Merlin, it was going to be an interesting year!


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**

**Just to let everyone know I made a few chronology mistakes when writing this story. (Thanks to NANLIT for catching one of them)The first being that I initially did make Lily and James 15 at the start of term when I had meant for them to already be sixteen (I did write them as sixteen later on so that didn't take too much correcting). The second being I had forgotten to include the whole Severus-discovers-Remus-is-a-werewolf-thing when I initially outlined and wrote the majority of this story. I'm in the process of fixing that mistake and am trying to do my best to fit it into my story line but hopefully it will all work out in the end!  
Cheers**

**Valkyrie3**

**Chapter 2 Back to School**

Lily stood on the platform searching the crowd for her friends. So far it seemed she was the only sixth year Gryffindor girl to show up in their usual meeting spot. Suddenly she was slammed into on her right side and she went toppling to the ground along with none other than Dorcas Meadows.

"Lily!" Dorcas cried gladly still lying on top of her friend. "Oh my gosh I missed you so much. How was your summer?"

Lily laughed and hugged her friend tightly. Dorcas was usually the energy in their group and with her long chestnut brown hair and big blue eyes she definitely stood out.

"It was great. A little different than usual, but great," She answered. "Now will you let me up off the concrete?"

Dorcas blushed slightly.

"Oh right. Sorry I forgot I tackled you there." She chuckled jumping to her feet and extending her hand to help her friend up.

No sooner had Lily regained her footing than two more figures, one blonde and one black haired, came rushing at them and suddenly she and Dorcas were on the ground again, this time with Marlene and Alice lying atop them.

"Hey guys. We missed you tons. Did you have a good holliday?" Alice chirped cheerfully.

"Yes did you? Ours was wonderful. We've so much to tell you. Is something wrong? You both look a bit winded."

Lily and Dorcas burst out laughing uncontrollably.

"Well would you look at that," A voice drawled comically, "a _dog_ pile. Mind if I join you ladies?"

Lily craned her neck to see around Alice's head to where Sirius Black was standing with Remus Lupin. Both boys were classically handsome, Sirius more so but it was there in Remus none the less and they made a stunning picture standing together and watching the girls.

"No Black you can't join." Marlene chuckled happily. "It's girls only." She stared at Sirius for a second and then added. "You know on second thought I've always had my suspicions about you. Perhaps you qualify afterall."

"Oooh. I'm hurt McKinnon. Really I am." Sirius said holding his hand to his heart but ruining the entire effect by smiling.

"Um could you by any chance let me up now Alice?" Lily questioned. "Not that I don't appreciate the love but this is the second time I've gotten acquainted with the floor of the train station today and lovely as it is I don't plan on spending any more time down here."  
"Right-O Lily dearest of course I'll let you up." Alice exclaimed jumping quickly to her feet and then helping yank Lily up as well.

"So Evans, do you um, need any help with your trunk there?" Sirius asked looking strangely as if he were grimacing in pain.

"Um… no that's okay Black. You don't really look like you're feeling up to it." Lily said eyeing his pained expression with curiosity.

"Alright then if you can manage...argh!...um what I meant to say is, it would be my pleasure…ouch.. I mean I wouldn't mind at all lugging that big heavy trunk all the way to.. OW!!…blast it James! If you want me to say something specific, why don't you just whisper it in my ear or something? I can't stand it when you pinch me like that!" Sirius said finally turning about huffily to reveal an irritated looking James standing behind him.

An uncharacteristic smile rose to Lily's face at the sight of James staring his best friend down as if he wanted to throttle him. He was wearing a black shirt and dark blue jeans. His hair was as much a disaster as she had ever seen it as if he were running his hands through it more than usual and the glasses he wore were dark frames that looked new.

"Look boys," Dorcas began, "we don't need your assistance. I'm sure we'll manage all on our own. So go ahead and be on your merry wa…"

"Actually," Lily broke in, her eyes still on the wordless exchange happening between James and Sirius. "I wouldn't mind some help at all. It is rather heavy though."

James eyes suddenly landed on hers.

It was exactly then that a sudden whooshing feeling came over her, as if her insides were trying to escape her middle. She wondered if maybe she had been just as nervous to see him again as he had been to see her. She frowned slightly trying to ignore the tingling in her limbs.

James couldn't quiet the butterflies in his stomach. She had had that affect on him since sometime around third year. It was then that he had realized he might more than just like her. And since then the feeling had continued to grow until he knew without a shadow of a doubt that he loved her.

It didn't help that she looked as beautiful as ever. Her long red hair was left loose down her back and the layers in it framed her face and shoulders in a sexy way. She was wearing tight blue jeans and a white button down elbow-length sleeved shirt with a camisole underneath. But the thing that always pulled him in no matter how hard he tried not to get caught up in her was her out of this world, stunning green eyes. They were the most amazing thing he had ever seen and he couldn't help but stare a little as he answered her.

"It's no trouble Lily." He said using her first name in front of her for the first time in a long time. "We'll just take it to the luggage car."

She nodded in agreement and then asked Alice and Marlene which compartment they were in. When she didn't receive and answer, Lily looked to her two friends questioningly. They along with Dorcas were just staring at her with their mouths open.

"You all look like fish out of water." Lily said worriedly. "Are you okay?"

Alice was the first to recover and she immediately rushed to Lily's side and slapped her hand to her forehead saying,

"Do you think maybe she has a fever? She didn't feel that warm a minute ago."

"Ouch Alice! What on earth?" Lily complained.

"Maybe she ate something bad." Dorcas suggested coming over and grabbing Lily's wrist to check her pulse. "Lily did you have any food that tasted off or perhaps try something you've never had before? Or Merlin forbid, did you eat anything Black gave you?"

"What no I…"

"She could be under some sort of curse and not know it." Marlene broke in looking Lily over worriedly. "Or maybe she.."

"For Gryffindor's sake! What on earth is the matter with you lot?!" Lily exclaimed breaking free of her friends and staring at them as if they'd lost their minds. "I'm perfectly fine. I've not eaten anything bad, or been cursed or contracted a fever or illness of any sort! Now can we please just get onto the train before it leaves without us?"

"But Lils," Alice said strangely. "You just accepted Potter and Black's help getting your things onto the train."

Lily sighed and looked over to where James and Sirius were lifting her trunk and following after Remus with big smiles on their faces.

"Look I'll explain everything on the train okay. Let's just get to our compartment."

Her friends reluctantly nodded and grabbing up their bags full of their school robes they marched along until they found the compartment they had been sharing together for the last five years as, Alice was always a ridiculously early arrival to the train station and therefore able to always secure it for them.

"Wow," Lily smiled fondly. "I can't believe this is our sixth year at Hogwarts."

"Alright missy no changing of the subject at hand," Marlene insisted. "We want to know what on earth has gotten into you. I mean you not only let the Marauders help you but you actually looked like you were being nice to them."

Lily sat down in her usual seat by the window and sighed again.

"Look, things have sort of changed between Ja...Potter and I for the time being. We are, well that is to say he wrote me over the summer and explained that he is going to try and correct his behavior. Not in a completely book-wormish total turn around kind of way, just in that he is going to try and be less arrogant and horrible toward others."

Alice, Dorcas and Marlene looked at her with shock.

"You mean you actually believed him with this?" Dorcas quipped.

"Well yes. I mean he wrote me a …uh, a few times over the summer and we agreed that if he is serious about it that maybe he and I can learn to be friends this year. He said he didn't want to finish off school with things the way they were between us last year and the year before. And personally I'm sort of sick of fighting and arguing with him okay? Besides you lot are always telling me that I should give them all, not just Remus, a chance. So I'm finally doing it." Lily explained.

"But Lils are you sure you can tolerate Potter? I mean you two aren't exactly the type to sit down and have tea with each other you know?" Marlene hedged.

"I know but.."

"And it doesn't help that James Potter has been in love with you practically since the moment he clapped eyes on you. I mean are you sure you can just be friends with a guy like that?" Dorcas added.

"What do you mean a guy like that?"

"Oh you know," Alice added. "The type of guy who cares about you enough to change the things within himself that you dislike about him. The type of guy who hasn't ever given another girl at Hogwarts the time of day, despite the fact that he is an over six feet tall well muscled, tanned, toned, athletic, incredibly gorgeous specimen of a guy and could have practically whatever girl he wanted. The type of guy who hasn't given two shits about the fact that girls throw themselves at him because the only girl he has eyes for is you. The type of guy who.."

"Okay Alice.. I think she gets it." Dorcas broke in.

"Sorry it's just. If I could instill even half that amount of devotion in a guy I would jump at the chance to be with him. I just don't know how Lily is going to handle just being friends with him."

Lily rubbed her temples feeling overwhelmed.

"Look you guys, I know it is going to be weird at first but I can't go back on my word. I told him that if he was willing to seriously consider changing I would be open to being friends with him. We still have to see if he can come through with it all and then…well let's just take this one step at a time. I mean you are asking me to think about James Potter in a way that is far beyond friends when right now I'm just starting to consider becoming that with him. So let's please just hit the brakes and slow down a little bit. Friends first and then…like a year from now… you guys can start in on all the weird teasing and emotional junk about him being crazy about me and what a wonderful guy he is okay?" Lily pleaded feeling overwhelmed.

Surprisingly her friends nodded.

"Okay." Alice said. "We'll just see how it goes."

"Thanks."

There was a moment of silence before Dorcas suddenly exclaimed.

"Do you know what this means?! It means we actually get to spend time with the Marauders as friends!"

Lily laughed knowing her friend had wanted to get to know Remus for a while.

"Don't sound so over the moon about it Dor." Marlene chuckled. "I mean afterall Lily might go back to screaming at Potter tomorrow in potions."

Alice frowned.

"How do you know we'll have potions tomorrow?"

"Oh please when have we ever not had potions with the Slytherins on the first day back?" Marlene groaned.

Lily smiled and looked out the window saying softly.

"Who knows, maybe this year will be different."

She wasn't aware of her friends exchanging mischievous grins at one another as she looked away.

************

"So without any more wise words from me, please tuck in."

Lily smiled as she ate her first meal back at Hogwarts. It was delicious as usual and such a far cry from her mother's cooking that she at with extreme vigor. As kind and wonderful as Rose Evans was she definitely wasn't great in the kitchen.

"So how about it? Do you think we can do them this year?" Alice wondered.

"I'm really not sure Al." Lily hedged. "I mean I know you've done a lot of research on the place and it seems up to par. But that sort of thing is permanent...or at least mostly so. I've heard they are a bugger to have removed."

"Come on it will be great fun. We can do it for Marlene's sixteenth birthday!" Alice begged, scowling at a small second year who attempted to reach for the same roll that she was.

"But what if my parents find out?" Dorcas added. "I mean my dad is great but he would literally curse me six ways from Sunday."

"You guys no one is going to find out." Alice huffed tearing off a piece of the roll she had won. "I mean if you don't want it seen just get it in a place no one will see it when you have your clothes on."

Lily frowned. "But that means I'd have to take my clothes off…"

"Um, hey."

Lily turned around to see James standing behind her blushing slightly and looking nervous. His hands were in his pockets and he was biting his lower lip. His hair was still as messy as it had been at the platform that morning.

"Hi." She said in a friendly manner. "Did you need something?"

He smiled and crouched down so that he was talking to her near her level but in a less conspicuous manner.

"I just wanted to tell you that the Marauders sort of have a prank planned for dinner tonight. It's nothing harmful or embarrassing it's just for fun okay?" He explained.

Lily sensed he was looking for her approval. She looked down the table to where Sirius sat looking irritated and making whipping motions with his hand at Remus who was shaking his head at him and looking as if he were trying to talk some sense into him.

"What's the matter with Sirius?" She asked pointing at him.

James sighed.

"He's annoyed that I'm coming down here to make sure this is okay with you. He says I'm whipped over a girl that…well never mind what he says. Don't worry about him. I just didn't want you to get upset about this after all the progress I've made so far."

Lily nodded looking thoughtful.

"So no one will be hurt by this?" James shook his head no.

"No hospital wing visits?" No again.

"No one will be overly embarrassed and afraid to show their face for a week?" Also a no.

"And it won't cause too much of a disturbance?" James shrugged.

Lily smiled, at least he was being truthful.

"Okay."

James looked at her in shock.

"Really? You're okay with this?"

She nodded.

"Great. Well I'll see you around then." He said taking off and heading back to where his friends sat.

"So?" Sirius asked in a melancholy voice, once James had settled in next to him again.

"She said it's cool with her." He answered.

Sirius spit his pumpkin juice out spattering his friends, who were oddly enough used to it.

"Get out of Hogsmeade! No way!" He coughed.

"Yup. It's fine with her as long as no one gets hurt and sent to the hospital wing or is traumatically embarrassed by it."

"I can't believe it!" Sirius exclaimed leaning his head on his hand, his elbow landing spectacularly into his mashed potatoes.

"Well it's true." James chuckled. "So you'd better be ready to go in a few minutes."

"Oh Prongsie my boy. I'm always ready. You know that." Sirius chanted.

"Remember the time we were supposed to play that prank on Filch and you fell asleep in the broom cupboard leaving me and Remus high and dry to serve detention without you because we got caught since you never casted the charm you were supposed to?"

"Or the time in third year when you were flirting with Mara Cantmen when you were supposed to swoop in and rescue Pete after he cursed those seventh year Slytherins." Remus added.

"Or the time in fourth when…"

"Alright so I'm not a_lways_ ready. But the majority of the time I'm square right?" Sirius said morosely.

"Ya Padfoot, the majority of the time we couldn't do this stuff without you." James assured him with a giant grin and a roll of his eyes.

"You lot are the most unappreciative sort of friends a bloke could have." Sirius muttered crossing his arms over his chest before turning to Peter with a scowl. "Did you have to smear your potatoes all over me again?"

***

It was near the end of the feast when suddenly every jug of pumpkin juice began to spout fireworks. A few startled first years were heard letting out shrieks of surprise. The fireworks were varying colors depending on the house tables and the students watched in wonder as they gradually made their way higher and higher toward the enchanted ceiling until it was bursting with color.

Then suddenly in the midst of the crazy explosions words began to form until the sky read,

_The Marauders (and your ever-faithful jugs of pumpkin juice) welcome you back to another year at Hogwarts! We can't wait to better make your acquaintance…_

Lily smiled and watched as the pumpkin juice jugs continued to spit varying colors of fireworks. Her eyes shot to the head table a second later where all the teachers, except Binns of course, were smiling or at least looking mildly amused.

Well she supposed if the Marauders had to pull pranks at least they had a little style.

"How great!" Alice exclaimed. "I mean this is probably one of their most harmless pranks yet and look how much everyone liked it."

"I'm just amazed that Lily is enjoying it as well." Dorcas chuckled.

Lily just smiled and turned her attention back to her dessert. So far James Potter was headed in the right direction with her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note**

**Please R&R and let me know what you all think of this story so far.**

Chapter 3 The First Days of School

At breakfast the next morning Lily, Alice, Dorcas and Emmeline were groaning over their schedule.

"It's always with them isn't it?" Dorcas sighed. "I mean you would think they would know by now that Gryffindors and Slytherins don't get along and would put us in separate classes, but no. Not only do they stick us in the same class but it's potions of all things where we can not only curse each other with our wands but throw dangerous and deadly chemicals at one another. Just _genius_."

"You know they aren't all bad." Lily said her attention mostly on devouring the tower of waffles in front of her.

"Yeah this coming from the girl who's so called best friend decided to call her the worst name imaginable." Marlene grumbled.

Lily sighed turning to face her friends.

"It wasn't the worst name imaginable. I mean he could have called me a whore, or a slag or a…"  
"Who called you a whore Evans?" Sirius Black asked jovially sitting down next to her and helping himself to the bacon on her plate.

Lily frowned at him. She wasn't really used to having any of them around and it was rather out of character for any of the Marauders to come sit by her, even Remus usually stuck to his friends unless he and Lily were going to study together or something.

"No one. We were just talking about how there are worse things for me to be called than a mu.."

"Don't say it." James growled suddenly from across the table startling Lily and the rest of her friends.

Sirius looked up at him sympathetically.

"Prongs mate…"

James sighed taking a seat across from Sirius and next to Marlene.

"I just..don't like that word." He said refusing to meet their eyes. "I mean there's nothing wrong with anyone's blood. It's stupid prejudice and a lot of the time jealously that motivates thinking like that."

Remus grinned joining the group by taking the seat next to Dorcas.

"We know that Prongs. You don't have to explain it to us." He said, reaching for the orange juice.

Sirius turned back to Lily.

"So who called you a.." he looked at James cautiously, "a you-know-what then?"

Lily turned back to her waffles.

"Who says someone called me that?"

"Well you did. Sort of." He replied as Marlene snorted. "I mean you said there are worse things that you could be called, which implies that someone called you that."

Lily looked at him in wonder.

"You know Black you are much more astute than I've previously given you credit for." She marveled.

"Thanks, I think." Sirius smiled thoroughly distracted.

Once they finished their breakfast, oddly sitting next to the Marauders, the eight Gryffindors walked to class together.

It was the start of a strange new tradition.

From that day on the eight students sat together in the mornings and walked to their first class together. Lily and James never directly spoke to one another but they didn't fight either. It was a new sight for everyone. And James was keeping up his good behavior. Lily was amazed to see him mostly behaving in class and while they still did dozens of pranks in the first weeks of school she hadn't heard of anyone getting hurt either physically or emotionally. He was still rather arrogant in her opinion but she supposed he was moving in the right direction.

Suddenly almost a month had gone by and Lily and James were still getting along. James had definitely changed. Lily was impressed and as a result was more friendly and less judgmental toward James and his friends in general. Things were gradually getting better between them. Yet, James remained slightly frustrated; he wanted to become friends with Lily not just cordial acquaintances.

One day just before Halloween in transfiguration a ball of paper landed in front of Lily.

_My Lily, _

_I was wondering if you might want to study this spell with me later. I was thinking the library 8 o'clock?_

She thought about it, smiled and wrote back.

_Sure. Walk me there after dinner?_

She through it back and winced when it hit Sirius on the side of the head instead of landing in front of James as she had intended.

She blushed and mouthed a sorry at him as James chuckled and picked up the paper. A minute later it landed in front of her again.

_Of course. See you then._

_P.S. We've got to work on your aim!_

She grinned and shrugged at him innocently before turning her attention back to McGonagall's lecture.

James grinned in shy excitement. She was actually giving him a chance. They were going to spend time together. Just the two of them and he hadn't forced her into it at all. She was coming with him willingly.

Sirius clapped him on the back and smiled in a gloating way.

"Maybe you haven't been a complete idiot the past five years after all." He whispered.

James shrugged.

"It's only studying Padfoot."

"Oh please you expect me to buy that bullshit? We are talking about Lily Evans here. _The_ Lily Evans. The girl you took off my list of available females at Hogwarts the first day we started school. The girl who hasn't given you a second thought other than, _'What a prat that James Potter is!' _for the past five years up until this summer. And now she is actually giving you a chance to be in her presence without causing some sort of major explosion slash disturbance and you try and tell me…your bestest friend in the whole wide world…that it's _only_ studying. Puh-leez. Don't insult me Prongs." Sirius huffed.

James sighed.

"Would you just shut up? If you just stay quiet and calm down maybe I'll let you know how it goes tonight. Maybe."

Sirius grinned widely and turned his attention to the front of the class.

That lasted all of thirty seconds.

"So what are you going to say to her?" He whispered a moment later.

"Ugh, I don't know okay? I haven't really thought that part out yet."

"Don't be a prat Prongs. You have got to have game plan buddy."

James groaned quietly.

"Tell me what you had in mind.."

Sirius grinned and began whispering like mad.

****

"Hey Lily," James greeted his books tucked under his arm.

Lily turned her smile still on her face, causing James' heart rate to instantly speed up.

"Oh hi, you're all ready I see." She commented, standing up and grabbing her bag from the floor.

James nodded and watched as she checked her things to make sure she had the right books notes.

"Alright guys I'll see you later." She called to her friends moving to stand next to James.

Alice sputtered slightly.

"Really?...huh..I mean really? You're gonna go study? With Po..I mean James?"

Lily smiled and nodded, waving goodbye.

"Damn it." Alice cursed as they left the Great Hall together.

"That's right pay up." Dorcas grinned holding out her hand.

"Alright." Alice grumbled. "Here's your ruddy galleon."

Dorcas smiled in pleasure and kissed her newly acquired gold before placing it in her pocket.

"Who would have known she would warm up to him that quickly?" Alice frowned.

"I believe that would be me, as I just won the bet." Dorcas gloated.

Alice sighed.

"Yeah yeah. Stupid James Potter and his ruddy handsome looks. If he were uglier that would have taken at least another two months. But no... he has to be completely gorgeous. Damn favorable genetics."

****

"So." James said awkwardly as he sat across from Lily.

"So." She repeated with a smile.

He sighed. They hadn't spoken at all since leaving the Great Hall and now that they were actually together and alone James had no idea how to proceed. He cleared his throat as he took out his transfiguration book from his stack of supplies.

"Look I'll be honest with you." He said finally, placing everything out on the table. "I'm actually really great at transfiguration and I really don't need to study this stuff."

Lily opened her mouth to reply when he broke in again.

"That sounded arrogant didn't it? I didn't mean it that way. What I meant was I already know how to do everything Minnie talked about today and..no that's wrong too. I just.."

Lily reached over and placed her hand across his mouth.

"James." She said laughing softly. "Breathe. Please."

She let her arm go and he nodded with a soft smile, his mouth twitching as if it tingled.

"It's fine that you already know all this. But since you don't seem to have a problem with what we learned today, would you mind telling me why you asked me to come here with you?"

"Actually it was just to get to hang out with you. I mean I know our two groups of friends are getting along better now, but I …well I felt like we were getting so close to being friends over the summer and then when school started," He paused with a sigh. "Well then I just wanted things to be good between us and to not upset you. So I sort of kept my distance. I asked you here because I wanted to talk to you. Spend some time with you. I hope that's okay." He finished biting the inside of his cheek anxiously.

Lily smiled and silently started putting her things away until the space in front of her was clear. Then she leaned forward and placed her elbows down on the desk and rested her chin on her palms, cupping her face.

"So James Potter, what do you want to talk about?"

James grinned and as he moved his things out of the way asked happily.

"Have you read anything good lately?"

"Oh my gosh yes I just started this amazing novel. I didn't really know if I would like it at first but well now I can't seem to put it down in my spare time." Lily replied her eyes lighting up.

And then they were off, talking about everything from the details of their summer vacation that had been left out, to quidditch and beyond.

****

"Ouch Wormtail! That was my foot!" Sirius growled.

"Sssorry Padfoot."

"Would you both just shut up? We are getting closer. How do you expect us to not be noticed if you two don't stop making so much racket?" Remus hushed.

The three friends quietly crept as close as they could to the table James was sharing with Lily in the corner of the library.

They were seated across from each other and both were smiling as James talked about something while making emphatic gestures with his hands.

Then suddenly Lily burst out laughing and had to cover her mouth to smother the noise.

"Moony..." Sirius whispered quietly.

"What Padfoot?"

"She's gonna fall in love with him."

Remus looked at Sirius questioningly but his friend wasn't paying him any attention. Sirius was looking at what was happening between his best friend and the girl of his dreams and he was smiling wider than Remus had ever seen him smile.

"Come on." Sirius said finally. "Let's go sneak into the kitchens."  
"But I thought we were gonna listen to what Lily and James were talking about." Peter squeaked in protest.

"Nah, change of plan Pete." Sirius said steering them back out of the library. "We're gonna let James do his thing."

***

"Oh my gosh it's already ten fifteen. Madam Pince should have kicked us out of here a half hour ago." Lily said suddenly looking down at her watch. "It's already past curfew."

"I guess we'd better head back then." James said sounding rather reluctant.

Lily smiled at him. She had to admit, now that she was giving James a chance to prove himself that he was actually an enjoyable person to spend time with. She had watched with interest as his golden brown eyes had lit up when they were talking about something that really interested him. He was so animated and he had continued to make her laugh throughout the night and she couldn't help but find herself having a good time as they talked.

She began to gather her things together and suddenly from out of no where she felt words spilling out of her mouth.

"Maybe we could do this again sometime soon?"

There was silence for a moment and Lily looked up from collecting her bag to see James staring at her with a look of awe on his face.

"Seriously?" He breathed incredulously. "You mean you would like to hang out together again?"

Lily smiled at his shock and nodded biting her bottom lip.

"How about tomorrow?" James asked eagerly, jumping at the chance to spend time with her.

Lily laughed lightly but shook her head.

"How about next week? Same time?" She offered instead.

"Definitely." He replied moving toward the door with her.

There was a moments quiet as they moved out into the corridor.

Lily finally broke it saying softly, "I'm impressed James. I'm not gonna lie. You've really.. well I won't say changed because I don't really think that's it, but you've really let me see the side of you that I never got to pay attention to before."

James grinned his eyes on the floor and replied just as quietly,

"I only hope you stay impressed from here on out."

Lily nodded and while she didn't say it she thought quietly to herself that there was little doubt he would continue to impress her for awhile yet to come.

*****

It was in Defense Against the Dark Arts later that week with Professor Landrel, a middle aged wizard with a head of wild gray hair that stuck up in the back as if he had slept on that particular spot, that the first changes in their classes began.

Lily watched as he began to write names on dark board. Most of them she didn't recognize but she realized most of the other students in the room had fallen deathly silent. By the time he was finished twenty three names lay on the board.

"These," their professor began, "are the names of the witches and wizards who were either killed or have gone missing just this summer."

The class listened with rapt attention, the silence almost overbearing.

"In only three months we've lost twenty three individuals. The war is escalating. Now this might seem an odd way to begin a lesson but now that we've had a month to readjust to our schoolwork I, and Dumbledore agrees with me, feel that it is time to begin preparing you for what is out there."

He went on to explain how they would be changing their lessons plans from then on out to accommodate dueling practice as well as self-defense spells and maneuvers.

"Another thing that we will be beginning this week is practicing conjuring a patronus." Lily's eyes widened along with the rest of the class. Patronuses were normally seventh year work.

"Dumbledore must really be getting worried," she heard Dorcas whisper to Marlene from the table behind them.

"Now," Professor Landrel continued, "is anyone here familiar with this spell?"

Lily wasn't surprised to see James and Sirius raise their hands as well as Marlene, whose father worked with James' as an auror.

Soon the professor had them standing up the desks shrunk and pressed against the walls for the time being.

"Now it's important to focus on a happy memory. The happier the better and you hold that memory or thought in your mind and use it to conjure the patronus. And remember the spell is _expecto patronum._"

Lily followed his directions and thought of her first day at Hogwarts. She remembered the feeling of knowing there was somewhere she belonged, of knowing that Severus had been right and that there really wasn't something wrong with her like Petunia said. She remembered meeting her friends and spending the first night after the feast not sleeping but talking all night with Alice instead. She remembered how it felt to look up at the sky in the Great Hall and know that she was finally home.

"_Expecto patronum." _She said smiling through the memories.

Suddenly a vague silvery figure erupted from the end of her wand. It didn't hold a shape but it was obvious that it was a larger animal.

"Very good Ms. Evans. Keep working on it. I think by the end of the week you might have it down." Professor Landrel praised.

Lily smiled at him and then turned her attention to where Marlene James and Sirius sat with George Hardison, a Ravenclaw, their four patronuses all solidly formed and moving about in front of them. Marlene's was a lioness and Lily watched it prowl about with envy. The other three were a very large dog, which looked something like a grim, a fox with large ears, and a huge stag that's antlers alone took up at least the length of her body from one side to the other. They were beautiful.

She sighed and moved to try again.

A few nights later at dinner Marlene remarked casually,

"You know Lily your patronus looks like it's going to be something big."

Lily smiled through heavy eyes, practicing like they had been doing took a lot out of her.

"Who knows maybe it will turn out not to be anything at all. All I've manage so far it that big cloud of silver." She yawned.

"I don't think it's a cloud. Besides everyone's patronus starts out vague. It takes a while to really get the feeling right. James said his took him more than three weeks. But once you get the hang of it, it will come more naturally to you."

"Let's hope it comes before next week or I'll be so worn out I won't make it through the rest of my classes."

A week and a half from when they had started Lily was still in the same position she had started in. All that would appear when she cast her spell was a big silver cloud. Alice had managed to conjure a lynx and Dorcas had managed a wolf but Lily was still struggling with her big silver cloud.

She felt foolish and embarrassed as the rest of the class sat playing with their patronuses while Professor Landrel tried to coach her through the process again.

It was nearing the end of the class and she was so frustrated she was close to tears.

"I'm sorry Miss Evans I'm afraid I just don't understand. Usually with the environment I've set up and without a real threat of Dementors students are better able to manage this spell."

Lily sighed and made to lower her wand.

"Wait." Sirius' voice rang out. "Maybe that's her problem."

"I beg your pardon Mr. Black?" Landrel raised an eyebrow.

"You see when I spent a month of the summer at James' and his dad was teaching us, James and I both had a hard time getting anything to happen until Mr. Potter conjured up something to scare us or make us angry or…I don't know something to challenge us. Maybe that's what Lily needs, something to motivate her patronus."

James was nodding along next to Sirius as he explained.

From the other side of the room Lily heard Jamie Carlson, a snobbish Ravenclaw girl, whisper loudly.

"Always knew muggleborns needed more help than the rest of us. She can't even manage a simple spell on her own."

Lily's pride prickled at the other girls words. She hated when people brought her background into her schoolwork. Hell she was one of the top students in her year, where did they get off acting like they were better than her.

"Professor I'll work on it." She spoke up, before Marlene or Alice could reply to the girls' comment, turning her attention to the older man who was still discussing the possibilities with James and Sirius.

"Lily I really think James and Sirius might be on to something here."

"Please sir. I'd really rather not hold the class up any longer. I'll work on it in my free time but it wouldn't be fair to keep the rest of the class from getting to practice dueling because I'm not able to pick this up." She pleaded. "If it's all the same to you, I'll just try and manage it on my own. If in a month I still haven't gotten it down we can discuss alternatives."

Lily refused to look at her friends as her teacher nodded his agreement. She wouldn't meet anyone's eye as she gathered her things and left the room.

"Lily.." Alice called after her as she made her way quickly down the corridor.

"I'll meet up with you at dinner alright." She called back trying her hardest to get as far away as possible before the tears fell.

As she sat down to dinner that night her friends were wise enough to not even glance at her sympathetically. They merely carried on with their conversation as if it were business as usual. Lily's thoughts were still on her patronus and her magical ability.

Suddenly she stood muttering to herself loud enough for her friends to hear.

"…more magical ability than that bloody stuck up snob… curse it all if I'm going to give up on this, I'm a damned gifted witch for Merlin's sake!..."

Marlene smiled at Alice and Dorcas as they watched their friend stalk out of the Great Hall looking even more determined than when she entered.

"I knew she wouldn't quit." Alice chimed happily.

"Of course not." Dorcas nodded. "Lily's never quit on anything in her life. She just needs something to motivate her every now and then."

James smiled hearing their words.

"I think I have a plan."

*****

The next week their schedule was switched around to accommodate all the sixth and seventh year DADA classes together, and they began their dueling practice, held in the Great Hall with multiple teachers there to assist. Lily was more than a little surprised when her name was paired with James'. She knew that normally he and Sirius pulled some sort of mischief to get to be partnered together.

They waited their turn to take their place on one of the roped off mats. Lily watched as the other students faced off against each other their faces determined or worried or, usually in the Slytherins case, joyful. She wondered about the world in which they lived forcing their teachers to have to help them better their dueling skills. It wasn't looking very promising.

Suddenly her name and James' were called out. A buzz went through the room as many of the other students remembered their grand show-downs when James had acted like a prat. They watched now as Lily and James approached the first empty dueling mat.

Before they walked in James grabbed her elbow and turned her toward himself.

"Look Lily before this gets too intense I've got to tell you I'm sorry."

"For what James?"

He sighed, "For what I'm about to do."  
Lily watched in confusion as he brushed past her roughly and took his place on one end of the roped off court. His face looked set and determined and she noticed Sirius muttering to him from the sideline.

She tried to ignore the feeling of warning in the pit of her stomach as she made her way to her own end of the court but the look on James' face, wiped of all emotion save resolve, had her senses on high alert.

"Alright you both know the rules, if you try anything that isn't permitted your wand won't obey and you will automatically be disqualified. Make it a clean match." McGonagall, who was overseeing their arena remarked sternly.

Lily and James both nodded and McGonagall left the mat and put the spell to protect the bystanders into effect. Her voice rang out as invisible walls formed from the edge of the mat stretching high toward the ceiling enclosing Lily and James inside the confines of the mat.

"You may begin." McGonagall's voice called.

Lily wasn't ready for James attack. First the stinging hex followed by a jinx that slammed her onto her back. The wind knocked out of her she could only slash her wand at him and nonverbally try to trip him up. It didn't work.

"Come on Evans." James taunted, his arrogant cocky persona firmly in place. "I would have thought you could do better than that."  
Lily stood and faced him once again. Her face marked with confusion.

"What's the matter Evans? Can't keep up?"

Before Lily could properly block it he sent another hex her way sending her spiraling through the air she hit the invisible wall hard and landed on her stomach choking for air. She looked up at James whose face was once again a mask with no emotion.

_Oh come on Lily._ She told herself sternly. _Just because he's trying to be your friend doesn't mean he's going to take it easy on you. _

She stood breathing heavily and grinned.

"Better watch out Potter." She called.

"For wha…"

James was cut short as her nonverbal punching spell hit him squarely in the jaw. She followed it with a few minor hexes waiting for him to recover.

"You know Evan's you would think with all the history we have behind us you would want to do more than just sock me in the jaw."

Lily frowned and could only gasp as her skin began to feel as if she were on fire. She refused to scream but then began to retaliate in earnest.

A crowd had gathered to watch them and it caught its' collective breath when suddenly it seemed Lily and James weren't fooling around anymore. Light of varying colors began to shoot out of their wands in rapid succession and only a few of the spells were managing to make contact now as both participants began to shield themselves. But when they did make contact the results were intense. James now sported numerous cuts from a slashing hex Lily had managed to get through and Lily was still struggling to breathe through the after effects of James' constriction spell.

The crowd gasped as James flew through the air and slammed into the wall much as Lily had done earlier just as Lily was dragged by some sort of invisible rope across the mat her jaw slamming into it roughly.

"Sirius you don't think they'd…" Marlene trailed off watching them go at it worriedly.

"Kill each other. Nah, but man do they have some serious sexual tension going on in there." He chuckled.

Lily was gasping for breath as she managed to free herself from James invisible hold. As she made to stand she realized James was only feet from her about to try and _expelliarmus_ her wand. Lily made a split decision and launched herself at him bringing him down hard onto the mat.

"What the…!" James grumbled as Lily grappled with him.

Spells flew at random as they twisted and turned Lily wrapping herself legs around James waist and using her left hand to reach for his wand as he used his to reach for hers. He groaned as she shifted and Lily grinned wickedly thinking he was as bruised and sore as she felt.

Suddenly two of their spells collided blasting them apart. They were each thrown back to their respective locations and at the same moment their eyes connected similar spells left their lips.

_"Expecto Patronum!"_

Just as the huge stag burst forth from James wand a doe of similar stature appeared from Lily's.

James gaped in shock and Lily covered her mouth as the two giant forms charged toward one another. They appeared to be on a collision course when at the last second they both slid to a stop and stared each other down. The seconds ticked by as the two figures studied one another. Slowly James' stag and Lily's doe began to circle, each eyeing the other with interest. Lily watched in wonder as the two patronuses suddenly moved closer to one another, each stretched out their neck and they touched noses. It was almost hypnotic watching them together, while James' stag appeared more intimidating with its' antlers reaching high, Lily's doe held a grace and a strength all its' own as well. They seemed like they fit together. Like someone had painted a forest and had captured the magical scene in front of them.

Lily looked up in amazement and watched as James sank to his knees his wand slipping from his fingers. As it hit the floor the bell rang out indicating James had lost but neither he nor Lily moved a muscle. Their patronuses disappeared as the invisible walls vanished. That was when the crowd moved in and Lily's friends rushed to her and she lost sight of James. She couldn't help but wonder what he had made out of the whole thing. She herself was utterly and completely confused.

****

James looked up as his best friend reached him pulling him off his knees to a standing position.

"Padfoot I…" He mumbled.

"I know Prongs come on. Let's get out of here for awhile."

Remus, Sirius and Peter led their friend from the Great Hall and toward the nearest empty classroom.

As Sirius sat James down on a desk his friend looked at him in confusion.

"Did you see?"

His friends nodded.

"But she can't…"

Remus sighed.

"I don't know if it means anything in regard to your animagus Prongs." He supplied. "Maybe it's just a coincidence."

"A coincidence?" James repeated beginning to get a hold of himself. "Not bloody likely. That thing was the match to mine. You saw it."

His friends were silent. James looked from one face to the next.

"Wasn't it?" He whispered feeling shaken.

"It sure looked that way." Remus agreed softly.

Sirius growled, "That's ridiculous people don't have matching patronuses."

James stood and moved to the nearest window. It looked out over the lake.

"It was like they knew each other or something…" He muttered quietly. "Like they were…"

How long he sat staring out at the lake he didn't know but when he finally turned around only Sirius was left waiting.

"Padfoot..." James sighed.

"I know Prongs." Sirius said moving forward until he leaned against the wall shoulder to shoulder with James. "I'm sorry I didn't understand before."

James shook his head and leaned into his best friends shoulder.

"I don't think I really did either but that…was something wasn't it? It meant something?"

"Yeah mate I think it did." Sirius answered tiredly.

They fell silent again.

When they finally did make it back up to the Gryffindor dormitory they only had a few minutes until dinner.

James was startled to find Lily seated on one of the couches Marlene on one side and Alice on the other with Dorcas at her feet.

He waited until she looked up at him, when she did he smiled in relief. The same feeling was still there. The same anticipation, longing, need…the same desire. He didn't know what he would have done if what had happened had somehow altered his feelings for her.

"Interesting class huh?" Sirius joked trying to lighten the atmosphere.

Lily's friends eyed him darkly.

"James I…" Lily began.

"Look it wasn't anything to get all mixed up about." He replied hiding behind his most charming smile. "I'm just glad I could finally force that patronus out of you."

Her face turned to one of shock.

"So that's why you were so mean? That's what you were apologizing for?"

James nodded. "Padfoot was right you just needed a little challenge."

Lily smiled then frowned.

"But that still doesn't explain…"

"So I'm off to dinner. What say the rest of you?" Sirius broke in dragging James along behind him.

James looked at him gratefully as they disappeared through the portrait hole once again.

Lily frowned but allowed her friends to pull her up as well. As she walked toward the Great Hall she let her mind wander. She supposed that if James could act like nothing had happened then she could too, because in the end she wasn't sure if anything really had happened or not. Did it matter if her patronus looked like it liked…or loved… or belonged with…James'? She decided it was probably safer not to think about it too much. She didn't sleep at all that night though.

****


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note:**

**Okay so I've been trying to get these first few chapters out as quickly as I can and I hope you guys are enjoying them (Reviews :) Please). This chapter has a bit of language and is kind of a filler for the next few chapters to follow. Hopefully I'm not moving along too quickly for everyone and the story is still flowing well. Let me know if you have any suggestions, questions or comments in general. **

**By the way I'm so sorry I didn't recognize you better earlier but thanks to NANLIT and The DA is dressed to the nines for reviewing! I definately appreciate the feedback.**

**Well I guess here goes Chapter 4**

HOGSMEADE AND HATERS

"Lily!" Dorcas called happily rushing into the common room and flopping down onto the couch next to her friend.

"Hey Dor, what's up?" She asked her attention on her transfiguration assignment.

"Well," Dorcas began tentatively, "You see I was talking to Remus a minute ago and well he sort of kind of asked what our group was planning for this Hogsmeade weekend and I told him we didn't have anything definite planned and he said that maybe our two groups should hang out and so I was thinking that, since you and James seem to be getting along quite splendidly these days, maybe you wouldn't mind spending a day in Hogsmeade with the Marauders?"

Lily looked at her friend in confusion wondering how on earth someone could talk so quickly and lengthy without taking a breath.

"So…what do you say?" Dorcas asked impatiently.

Lily smiled, it had been a few weeks since the weird incident where she dueled James and since then they had fallen in to their regular routine. She had initially spent more than a few waking hours dwelling over the significance of the whole thing but every time she had nearly gathered the courage to bring the matter up with James she lost her nerve. He had gone on and acted like the whole thing was nothing to be surprised about and if she was being honest with herself she didn't really want it to mean anything either. So she tucked it away and tried not to think about the idea of her and James having similar patronuses and went on with her life as usual.

"It's fine with me if we meet up with them and go together. As long as Marli and Alice are good with it I'd say it's a go."

"Oh please Lily, it's the Marauders for Godric's sake. Like Marli and Alice are gonna say no." Dorcas muttered jumping up and running off.

Lily shook her head at the madness of her friend and tried to focus on her homework. After a few moments she sighed in defeat her thoughts now thoroughly ensconced in the upcoming Hogsmeade trip.

She and James had been getting along great for the past couple of weeks, other than the awkward day after the dueling incident, and at the Halloween feast they had even sat next to one another trading stories and jokes and enjoying the atmosphere. Their library meetings had still been fairly regular and sometimes they would meet other places and just hang out for awhile, unless they had exams or homework that really needed doing. The week before they had even taken a walk out to the lake as James had suggested and Lily had enjoyed immensely.

She wondered what Saturday was going to be like spending her time with the four Marauders and her friends; it was likely to turn out rather interesting.

****

Remus entered the sixth year boys' dorm with a broad smile on his face.

"Well?" James questioned anxiously.

"Would I be smiling if they had said no?" Remus quipped coming over to where James was sitting on his bed and clapping his friend on the back.

James breathed a sigh of relief and smiled widely as he fell back onto his four poster.

Sirius chuckled at his besotted best friend.

"You know Prongs I really think you are making strides with Evans. She hasn't even given you a dirty look this year and we've still managed all sorts of mischief."

"That's because it's not really the mischief that makes her angry, it's the hurting people or embarrassing them that blows her stack." James replied.

"Well we've matured my friend." Sirius informed mock seriously. "We are no longer the misguided miscreants that inhabited our youth."

"Well I for one am glad we actually get to spend a little time with our fellow Gryffindors now." Remus added.

Sirius grinned at him cheekily and said, "That wouldn't have to do with a certain rambunctious petite brunette now would it Moony?"

He was rewarded by Remus' blush and James' chuckle, which of course prompted him to continue.

"Well you know Moony old pal I'm almost certain that Miss Meadows has been pining for you for quite awhile now." He teased.

"Who says I'm interested?" Remus feigned nonchalance.

"I do. Besides every bloke in school, minus Prongs here, would gladly give their left nut to be with Meadows, she's a babe. Great hair, great eyes, great legs. You get the picture."

"Maybe she's not my type." Remus supplied, his look turning mischievous. "I mean McKinnon is just as good-looking, she's dark and exotic, not to mention smart and sort of cutely shy and.."

"Don't go there Moony." Sirius snapped.

Remus sighed in defeat. He knew it wasn't right to push his friend but in all honesty Sirius had been secretly in love with Marlene McKinnnon almost as long as James had been in love with Lily. The difference being that where James was openly adoring and let his feelings be known, Sirius had never felt he was good enough for Marlene. Remus suspected that this was due to her family being one of the more outstanding ones within the wizarding world; her father was an auror along with James' and her mother worked in the ministry of magic for the Muggle Safety and Protection Division. Sirius never liked to talk about his family and about their affiliations with the wizard now calling himself Lord Voldemort, but it was a well known fact that the Black family was notorious for associating with Dark wizards and wanting to maintain Pureblood supremacy. And while they didn't yet openly declare themselves as being in support of the man now beginning to terrorize the wizarding world, they let it be known that they weren't necessarily against his radical ideas either.

James sat up and eyed his best friend in irritation.

"Padfoot, you know I think you should let her know that you like her. This is our sixth year for crying out loud, we only have two years of school left before the real world hits us. You are going to regret it if you don't."

Sirius shrugged and began to busy himself looking through the latest Quality Quidditch Supplies catalog.

"I'm serious Padfoot." James went on, as Remus moved off to his own four-poster knowing James could get through to Sirius better than he could. "You've had it in your head for so long that she is too good for you and that's just ridiculous. I think you are underestimating her and yourself. If you would just..."

"James," Sirius growled, using his best friends' actual name indicating his irritation. "We both know how that would go. Her family and mine are…well let's just say she wouldn't want to be bringing me to meet her parents any time in this life. Besides I have plenty of willing birds to fill my time. I don't need the seriousness of a relationship that would come with someone like Marlene. She's not the type to go for a bloke like me."

James sighed.

"I honestly wish you could see yourself the way your friends do and not how you think people see you." He said tiredly.

"Mate, we both know how the world views me. I'm a bad apple from a bad family and just because my loyalties lie along different lines doesn't mean my hearts' not just as black as the rest of my family."

"Yes it does. Besides those idiots you're calling family aren't your real family anyway. We are. Me and Moony and Wormtail. And you know my parents are crazy about you."

"Prongs mate, lets just drop it for now okay? Besides you should be completely psyched. Afterall, we get to spend a whole day in Hogsmeade with Lily Evans this Saturday." Sirius smirked.

James grinned in shy excitement, falling back onto his own four poster once again. He really was going to get to spend Saturday with the girl of his dreams.

****

"Seriously Lily, you aren't allowed to just wear anything. I mean come on." Alice protested grabbing the outfit of worn jeans and a gray turtleneck Lily had picked out off of her bed and throwing it into the laundry hamper.

"Alice! Those aren't dirty." Lily squawked as she reached to pull them back out before they vanished to the castle laundry room.

Meanwhile Alice was raiding her trunk and her dresser looking for the right outfit.

"She's right you know. You can't just wear anything." Marlene chimed as she walked out of the bathroom looking stunning in a red v-neck sweater and dark jeans.

"I don't see why not. It's not like it's a date or anything." Lily protested sitting on her bed and crossing her arms over her chest while Marlene began to help Alice dig through Lily's things.

"Oh please. As if you expect us to believe you don't want to look nice today." Alice scoffed and then yelled out triumphantly when she produced a black sweater and white coat and scarf that would off-set Lily's hair and then dark blue jeans to go with it.

"Nice." Marlene commented. "Then she can wear my black boots."

"Ugh." Lily groaned. "I still don't see how this isn't a casual outing. I mean why are we all getting dressed up?"

"Because we are spending the day with guys for once, that's why!" Alice said throwing the outfit at Lily and pointing to the bathroom for Lily to go change. "And leave your hair down."

Lily stuck her tongue out at her friend as she pranced by but she complied nonetheless.

Twenty minutes later the four friends made their way down to the Entrance Hall where James, Remus, Sirius and Peter were waiting for them along with two seventh year Gryffindors, Frank Longbottom and Gideon Prewett.

"Hey guys." Dorcas called out jovially as she led the way down the stairs.

"Hello ladies." Sirius replied in an appreciative voice. "You were all definitely worth the wait."

Remus snorted at his friends' cheesiness and fell into step next to Dorcas as she strolled by.

Alice ran up to her cousin Gideon and gave him a hug.

"Gideon, we really don't hang out enough you know."

"I know brat." He replied returning the hug. "You know my friend Frank right?"

Alice turned and smiled at the other tall seventh year Gryffindor.

"I believe we've me before."

Frank grinned and began walking with Alice and Gideon.

"We definitely have, I don't think we've ever had the pleasure of hanging out together though."

Lily watched them stroll off and then looked at Marlene pleadingly, hoping that her friend got the hint and didn't leave her and James alone. Unfortunately (or possibly purposefully) Marlene wasn't looking her way and she strolled up to Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew throwing her arms around their necks and tugging them toward the door.

"So Black where are we off to first?" She asked a little too enthusiastically as they walked away leaving Lily and James to stare at one another awkwardly for a moment.

Finally James cleared his throat and broke the silence.

"Ready to go Lily?" He asked with a smile.

Lily nodded and accepted his outstretched arm.

They walked down the hill together toward Hogsmeade talking occasionally about classes and school. Lily felt strangely awkward around James, as if she hadn't been spending the past few weeks in the library getting to know him or hanging out with him as a friend. The butterflies in her stomach refused to settle down and for the life of her she couldn't figure out why felt like she was on some sort of first date.

It didn't help either that every so often someone would spot them walking together arm in arm and would stop dead in their tracks as if they'd been petrified. Their actions only made Lily feel more self-concious about being with James.

"So what do you think of Longbottom and Prewett eh?" James asked pointing toward where Alice, Gideon and Frank were strolling along next to Sirius, Peter and Marlene.

"I think they are both nice guys. Frank has helped me out a couple of times with Defense Against the Dark Arts and Gideon has always been fun to hang out with." Lily supplied.

James chuckled.

"I meant Frank and Alice." He clarified.

"What do you mean?"

James raised his eyebrows at her suggestively.

"Really?" Lily exclaimed. "Do you think he likes her?"

"Oh please, don't tell me you haven't noticed it? He stares at her when he thinks no one is looking. He blushes when he does something clumsy around her, which tends to happen a lot. He looks all spiffy today and he hasn't dated anyone in over six months, and according to Padfoot at the end of last year Frank ran into Alice on the way to charms knocking her books all over the place and for the next week he sort of stared off into space."

"How on Earth would Sirius know that?" Lily laughed.

"Don't ask me where the bloke gets his information." James said looking at her happily. "He just knows these things."

"So you think there might be something there?" Lily questioned. "It would be great for Alice. She really hasn't dated anybody since she broke up with Tom Notlef the year before last."

"Who knows maybe they'll hit it off today."

Lily looked up at him curiously wondering at the meaning behind the tone of his words.

"So is this supposed to be a set-up of some kind?" She asked softly. "You know the sort where everyone pretends it's a group hang out sort of thing and then _Bam_! they all magically disappear and _voila _James and Lily are all alone together."

James flushed slightly but looked her straight in the eye.

"I didn't plan it that way Lily, honest I didn't. And if you want to we can hurry and catch up with the rest of them and I can force Padfoot to spend the day with us whether he wants to or not. I don't want you to feel trapped or something."

"I believe you. I don't think you planned this. But I don't think you are disappointed about how it's turning out either." She teased.

James' blush deepened.

"Well I can't say I'm sorry I'm here with you. And I can't say I'm sorry they left us to together. And I'll never say I'd rather share the time I get to spend with you with other people but I will say I'm not sorry at all to be here walking with you Lily Evans." He paused for a moment. "Are you disappointed that it's just you and me for now?"

"We'll see." She said mischievously. "I suppose it's going to depend."

"On what?" James asked.

"On whether or not I have a good time today." She replied with a wink.

"Well I guess I'll just have to see to it that you have an amazingly good time today."

"Yeah, I guess you will."

They smiled at each other, both enjoying themselves already.

***

The day seemed to fly by to Lily. James took her to all his favorite shops and even led her to a great bookstore that she hadn't known existed in Hogsmeade. She had spent so much time in there that she feared he would get bored, but lo and behold he was just as absorbed in looking through the titles as she was and in the end he purchased two more books than she did.

James shrank their purchases throughout the day and kept them in his pockets. He had a good time playing around with her in Zonko's and he went overboard buying her favorite candy in Honeydukes, explaining when she protested that he was really buying his own favorite candy and that if it just happened to end up going up to the wrong dormitory staircase at the end of the day he couldn't help that.

They were unaware of the spectacle they made when they finally stumbled into the Three Broomsticks to meet up with their friends for dinner. Lily was laughing loudly as James offered to help her remove her scarf and coat.

"You've got to be kidding me?" Lily chimed twirling about so he could unwind the scarf from her neck.

"Nope I swear. Couldn't believe it myself but well..my parents have always been a bit love-struck I suppose." He chuckled back, as he helped her to shrug out of her coat.

"That's too funny. The most I've ever seen my parents do is jump apart and blush when Pet and I accidentally interrupt their snogging. Then they try to pretend they were doing something normal like my Dad was getting something out of my mum's hair or my mum was fixing his tie or something else just as dreadfully unimaginative." Lily supplied watching him hang up her coat and scarf.

"Well I suppose if my parents were even remotely normal they would probably do the same." James answered taking her hand and steering her toward the table their friends were sharing.

"I bet they're wonderful." She stated as he allowed her to slide into the large booth first.

"I wouldn't go that far, but yeah they're pretty great."

He slid in next to her and put his arm on the cushioned wood above her shoulders.

"It must have been amazing growing up in the wizarding world." Lily said her eyes never leaving his as they scooted further into the booth. "I've talked about it with Marlene and Alice and Dorcas a little but it always reminds me just how different I am from my friends you know?"

"Yeah," James nodded. "I understand that better than you think. But as for growing up in the wizarding world well... it is pretty awesome. You get away with a lot more than you normally would, especially since your education is given to you by your parents until you get your Hogwarts letter but at the same time it isn't very fun to know that you could be doing magic to get your chores and what not done but you have to abide by the law and not conduct any underage magic. I mean not that I didn't sneak in a few spells here and there but at least you didn't have to deal with knowing you could do magic but not being allowed to for eleven years."

"But that's just it!" She exclaimed. "I would have loved to have known. It was so strange being little and not knowing why I could do things so out of the ordinary. I was convinced there was something wrong with me until Severus told me about magic and being a witch and even then it was hard to swallow something so extraordinary. I don't think I was able to truly believe it until I got my letter and was actually off to Hogwarts."

James eyes widened.

"Severus told you about magic? When you were both little?"

Lily smiled softly.

"Well yes. He lived near my neighborhood and we used to play together in this park that was near both our houses. We were great friends at least until… well that is to say, now I just hope he chooses the right path in life. I worry about him a lot."

James nodded seriously.

"I love that about you. You've never cared about the material things. If someone's your friend they matter to you, no matter what." James paused. "And I know it's probably a little too late for this but I'm sorry for the way I treated him all those years. Needless to say a big part of it was that I was jealous of how much time you spent with him and how close you guys were. "

"I know James. And really it's fine. Sev and I aren't anywhere near as close as we used to be and I can't say that he's the same person I used to know and defend."

Lily's thoughts turned to her former best friend for a moment. She had avoided mentioning or thinking about him overmuch for the past few months because a part of her still hurt when she thought of how things used to be between them. While his calling her a Mudblood had been the catalyst behind their rift she knew deep down that they had been drifting apart long before that. His path and hers were dividing more all the time and it was because of the different people they were becoming and the choices they were making along the way. She knew it was foolish but sometimes she wished she could still walk up to him and tell him about her day just as she had always done before.

"Can I ask you something?" James leaned in lowering his voice.

He was unaware, as was she, of the eight other Gryffindors leaning a bit closer to try and hear as well.

"Sure. Go ahead." She encouraged her voice just as quiet for some unknown reason.

"Would it be too personal of me to ask if you and he…what I mean to say is, was there something there? Or, I mean…did you and him…uh…"

"James." Lily broke in, her voice now only a whisper. "It's okay that you asked and to answer your question, Sev and I were…ow!"

Lily looked behind her to see that all eight of their friends were leaning in or over the table in order to hear their conversation and Dorcas, who was seated next to her had gotten shoved so close her elbow had dug into Lily's back.

"Way to go Dor!" Alice cried in exasperation.

"It wasn't my fault! Remus is practically my conjoined twin he's so close!"

"I'm only this close because Padfoot has taken it upon himself to rather geniusly try and hear through my other ear!" Remus protested.

"Hey it sometimes works!" Sirius protested. "And I don't think 'geniusly' is a real word."

"Oh right that's just what I need, grammatical help coming from someone who thinks that if he sticks his left hear onto my right one he can hear what I do on the other side!"

Lily burst out laughing uncontrollably, followed shortly by James.

"You see. I told you they liked each other. They share the same sense of humor." Sirius said loudly.

Remus and James groaned as Lily flushed scarlett as Alice called to the young twenty year old serving witch, named Rosmerta, to come over to their table.

She approached with a smile.

"What can I get you all?"

"Just another round of Butterbeers please. Now ten in all." Remus supplied.

"For my favorite Gryffindor boys. Anything." She winked and was about to walk away when she spotted James with his arm still resting on the booth above Lily's shoulders.

"Well now. Finally caught that red-head your always on about eh?" She asked playfully.

Now James flushed crimson.

"Well no you see…"

"Hi, I'm Lily." She broke in, cutting James off and extending her hand to the bar-maid.

"I know who ye are love. James here can't shut his gob about you. Seems to think your perfect this one does." Rosmerta chuckled, nodding her head at James and shaking Lily's hand.

"Does he now?" Lily smiled impishly as James turned a shade of red akin to that of her hair.

"I would say so. He hasn't stopped singing your praises since the day I met him. Pity that, he's a dashing young thing." The woman teased eyeing James appreciatively.

"Most dashing." Lily agreed her smile getting wider by the minute.

"You know Lily, if I were to find a lad who thought I was perfect and couldn't shut up about me even when I wasn't with him, and especially in front of his mates, I'd be mightily inclined to keep that bloke around for as long as possible." Rosmerta advised.

Lily nodded her smile now one of thought.

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You see that you do." Rosmerta grinned and with one last chuckle at James she took off to fill their order.

Once she was out of ear shot James buried his face in his hands and groaned.

"Is it over? Please tell me it's over?"

"Aww James, that wasn't so bad." Sirius commented. "I mean it's not like Lily didn't know you've had it bad for her for like forever. I mean come one mate you've never even sl…Ouch! Bloody hell Moony that was my stomach you just elbowed!"

"Was it really? My mistake, I was looking for your center of intelligence, and as it obviously isn't your brain I figured I would have to move a bit lower."

"Well your gonna have to move a bit lower than that if you want results Lupin." Marlene teased. "For it's likely in his trousers."

The whole group laughed and as Sirius and Remus began another round of verbal sparring Lily leaned over and whispered to James.

"Want to head back now?"

He nodded and they slipped out of the booth as silently as possible.

"That had to be a miracle." James said in shock. "I can't believe they didn't even notice us leaving."

"Either that or they were just pretending not to notice and will, likely, follow behind us at what they think is an inconspicuous distance hoping to catch us snogging or some such nonsense." Lily supplied following along next to James as they moved down the lane toward the castle.

"Nonsense huh? Maybe to you." James said softly.

Lily frowned.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"I know."

"Really James, I know that we haven't always been on the same page but after all the letters this summer and our spending time together each week. I really feel like maybe someday, not necessarily soon, but someday there might be a chance we could be truly close friends or… something more maybe. I don't know. Right now I still feel like I'm getting to know you. That's important."

James smiled as she finished her eyes still thoughtful.

"Alright Evans." He said putting his arm around her in a friendly manner. "Are we becoming friends then?"

Lily grinned.

"Don't get your hopes up Potter."

****

In the days following the Hogsmeade trip Lily and James could be seen quite often walking together between classes and sitting near each other at meals. It appeared to most that James Potter was making definite progress with the girl he had been after for what seemed like forever.

It was when they were walking to dinner one Wednesday after class that the first of the rumors reached Lily's ears. She was laughing at something Sirius had said to Dorcas when she bumped into a fifth year Ravenclaw girl.

"Oh I'm sorry." She apologized.

The girl glared at her fiercely and then muttered to her friend.

"I wonder if she's sleeping with all of them or just with Potter."

Lily frowned as the girl made to move off and grabbed her arm.

"Hey." She said firmly. "For your information I'm not sleeping with anyone."

The girl just shrugged out of Lily's hold and moved away.

"What was that all about?" Marlene asked having only caught the end of it.

"I have no idea."

When they reached the entrance hall Lily's mind was still on the scene in the hallway. She was so absorbed that she didn't see the large group of Slytherin girls coming her way until they were right next to her.

"Well if it's not the little mudblood slut. Tell us mudblood does he pay you for your efforts or do you just get off on meddling with your betters?"

Lily turned to face the girl who had spoken in her ear.

"Excuse me?" She replied.

"Come on Evans we're just trying to figure out your motive. Is it his money your after, or his status, or is it just his body that's been making you hang around him like a bitch in heat?"

"You know Bellatrix with a mouth like that it's a wonder even your own house mates will have you." She said softly and attempted to follow after her friends.

The Slytherin girls surrounded her slowly cutting off her route to her own table.

"You know there are plenty of rich half-bloods who I'm sure would be more than willing to have a go with you Evans. How about you quit trying to taint good _pure_ wizarding blood with your filth and look into dating one of them."

Lily smiled.

"You know it's understandable that you're jealous. Didn't James turn you down last year more than once?"

Bellatrix's dark eyes narrowed.

"Like I would ever be jealous of a prudish bookworm mudblood like you," she screeched.

Lily sighed.

"First I'm a slut, now I'm a prude, make up your mind which is it Bellatrix?"

The Slytherin girl was just about to answer when a voice called out firmly.

"Is there a problem here?"

Lily looked up to see Professor Dumbledore headed their way. His blue eyes twinkling as always but very aware of the situation at hand.

"Miss Evans is everything alright?"

She shrugged and looked to Bellatrix.

"I think you should ask Black that question." She replied calmly.

Dumbledore turned his eyes onto the group of Slytherin girls who remained silent and refused to meet his eyes.

"I believe Miss Evans would like to be on her way. Her friends are waiting for her." He said finally. "I'm sure Miss Black that there won't be any such instances in the near future."

The Slytherins moved off without a word to sit at their own table and Lily, after bidding Dumbledore farewell, made her way quickly toward where her friends stood waiting at the Gryffindor table.

James was the first one to speak.

"What happened?" He asked steering her toward a seat at the Gryffindor table. "One second you were with all of us and the next we didn't know where you went."

Sirius sat across from Lily and growled out fiercely.

"What did my foul bitch of a cousin want?"

Lily sighed softly.

"Nothing pleasant that's for sure."

James opened his mouth to question her again when suddenly Lily was lifted back up out of her chair. She emitted a small squeak as she was dragged by her elbow toward the corner of the great hall.

She looked up to see Severus Snape towering over her.

"What do you want Sev?" She asked tiredly.

Snape leaned over her menacingly, causing Lily to think he was probably trying to impress his fellow Slytherins with his mean treatment of the muggleborn. In the later days of their friendship he had often been like that. Avoiding her or trying to look like he was irritated with her when other prominent Slytherins were about but acting as if things were perfectly normal when it was just the two of them together.

"Are you out of your mind Lily? Spending time with that toerag James Potter, what's gotten into you?" He hissed in irritation, his eyes glancing back at the Slytherin table cautiously.

Lily scowled.

"You know Sev, I've had just about enough of being bullied around today. What I do or don't do with James Potter is no ones business but mine! I can spend as much time as I bloody well want with the bloke and you and everybody else can go fly a kite! And for your information despite his treatment toward you, which is just so happens stemmed from jealousy, he is actually a more than decent individual, not that it's any of your business. You gave up any claim to being my friend when you chose being in with your fellow Slytherins over being a decent person." She fumed shoving him hard on his shoulder. "Now if you'll excuse me I would like to go eat my dinner in peace."

She stormed back to her seat at the Gryffindor table not once looking back at him and sat down in a huff. She reached for the mashed potatoes and began to angrily shovel them onto her plate thinking all the while how ridiculous people were but mostly trying to hide the fact that she was still hurt at Severus' treatment of her.

Somewhere around her tenth scoop of potatoes James gently took the bowl and ladle away and switched her plate for his own empty one. He added gravy to the top and began eating the huge mound of white silently.

Lily sighed and rubbed her watery eyes tiredly. She then proceeded to put a normal amount of other foods on the clean plate he had given her and began to eat just as silently as James. If any of their friends found their silence or the fact that James was gallantly working his way through a mountain of mashed potatoes out of the ordinary they didn't mention it and Lily was grateful for friends who knew when to pretend everything was fine.

*******


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note**

**So I just wanted to let you guys know I'm really appreciating those of you who take the time to review! I love hearing what you guys have to say :) Now I know these chapters have been sort of flying by but I promise once I get past Christmas things will slow down a bit more. If you have any ideas, comments or suggestions as to what you want to happen go ahead and let me know!**

**Also the whole T-shirt thing in this chapter (though I had to tweak the sayings just a bit) arose from my sister's volleyball team making shirts like them. Hopefully you guys enjoy the sillyness as much as I did when I first saw them :)**

**Also I know James hasn't really been standing out much (as far as me writing things from his point of view) but I'm working on improving that in the next few chapters. Sometimes I have an easier time writing things from Lily's perspective but that doesn't mean I should neglect James in the process. **

**I know this is a short one but the next one will make up for the length I promise.**

Dreams, Gossip and Quidditch Quotes

He was holding her. That was all, just sitting with her in the common room with his arms wrapped around her in an embrace so welcoming and protective that Lily could feel her heart swelling in her chest. It was a perfect moment, one she had never expected to have. It was oddly satisfying sitting with him like that. Feeling safe and protected because he was there to keep her that way. She breathed deeply and shifted in his arms. Slowly her eyes travelled the length of his body.

She lingered over his strong legs and his delectable middle. How was it possible for someone to look so good that you seriously considered what they tasted like on a regular basis?

She eyed his beautiful neck and jaw and at the last second let her eyes meet his startlingly golden brown ones….

Lily gasped sitting up in bed and pulling the sheet to her chest.

Her brain was on overdrive. Had she really just dreamed about herself and James Potter as if they were together? Her senses were on fire. Her palms were sweaty and tingling, her heart was pounding in her chest and her legs were shaking madly.

She slid carefully out from under her covers and after testing out her shaky legs she headed for the bathroom.

After splashing water on her face and neck she felt a bit better. Yet her mind still spun with the image that had been painted in her dream. She couldn't possibly have feelings for James, not yet. They had barely been on good terms for a few months now and had only been back at school for a little over two.

She bit her lip in frustration as she considered the meaning behind such a dream.

"Lil?" Alice stumbled in sleepily. "I heard someone in here. Are you alright? Did you have a nightmare or something?"

Lily looked at her, eyes wide.

"Alice I…"

Her friend's eyes sharpened.

"What is it?"

Lily sighed, "I just had the strangest dream. I mean it was so real…like I was looking into the future or something. But that can't be right."

Alice beckoned her over to the wall and together they slid to the floor.

"Tell me about it." She encouraged as Lily stared straight ahead.

Lily considered for a moment not telling her but then reconsidered. "Can you please try not to read into it too seriously?"

At her friends not she went on, describing the dream and how she had felt during it, and about how once she had realized who the guy was she had woken up with a start.

Alice frowned, "And you are sure it was James?"

She nodded refusing to meet her friend's keen eyes.

"Well I might be wrong but judging by what you say you felt during the dream I would take it to mean that a part of you thinks that if you continue to give James a chance that things might work out exactly how…well I suppose how he always dreamed they would. Then, judging by your reaction once you realized who it was, I would say that another part of you is terrified of that happening. For years now you've felt safe knowing you and James didn't get along despite his attraction toward you and now everything that you knew is being turned on its' head and there's a possibility that some small part of you is even starting to think of James as being more than just a friend, and that is totally against everything you knew before."

When Lily didn't respond Alice continued.

"I think, and feel free to refute this assessment if you feel it's lacking, that you are feeling conflicted. You are still getting used to the idea of being friends with James and now your subconscious is throwing something so far beyond that at you that you aren't prepared for it."

Lily nodded.

"I think you are right. It was just a dream afterall, it was honestly just that it felt too real and…so good."

Alice grinned.

"Give it some time Lils. I know that you are still afraid the old James is gonna jump out at you one of these days but so far that hasn't happened. Just keep doing what you are doing. Keep giving him the chance to prove himself to you. Then maybe, awhile from now, you can revisit this whole dream thing and see what it means."

Lily nodded thankfully and stood extending her hand to her friend.

"Thanks Al."

"No problem."  
As they each climbed back into their four poster Lily couldn't help but feel confused. She knew Alice was right and that she should let the whole thing rest for awhile, but it was hard to erase the feeling of how wonderful it had felt to be held by him…even if it was just in a dream.

****

"You had better say you are coming Evans!" Sirius exclaimed loudly as he and Peter discussed the upcoming Quidditch game against Ravenclaw with Lily and her friends.

"When have I ever missed watching Dorcas play?" Lily retorted saucily.

"Never, but this time I'd better hear some cheers directed my way." Sirius demanded.

"Of course I'll try to cheer for you." She replied grinning. "Marlene will as well."

Marlene smiled her blue eyes sparlking and added cheekily.

"I made t-shirts for me and Lily and Alice to wear to watch you guys."

"Really," Alice asked instantly intrigued. "What do they look like?"

"You'll just have to wait and see." Marlene responded her eyes turning devilish.

A sudden thud sounded from upstairs and a moment later a familiar figure came streaking down the stairs.

"Lily oh my gosh I just finished it!" James called excitedly, waving a worn leather book around as he talked. "Please, please tell me you have the next one."

She smiled and stood up meeting him as he reached the couches.

"Didn't you like the part where he almost had him cornered and then poof he was gone?"

"Yes and then later on you learned he had planned the whole thing orchestrating it so that it would all work out just so."

"But now you have to read the next one because you don't know where the girl is until you read it and then you start piecing together how it was all just one big interconnecting plan." She explained excitedly.

"You do have the next one right?"

She nodded, "Just let me go grab it."

James followed her with his as she dashed up the girls' staircase until she disappeared into her dormitory before turning his attention to his friends.

"Oh hello, realized we're here did you?" Sirius teased.

James blushed slightly as he flopped down into Lily's vacated seat.

"I'm sorry I just…"

"It's alright Prongs I know you can't help it mate."

Alice, Marlene and Dorcas all smiled at the look on James' face.

"You know," Marlene said softly. "On of these days she's going to realize that you are everything she has ever wanted."

James smiled at her but his eyes darted back to the stairs as Lily came down them the book in her hand.

"Here you go." She said handing it over as James stood up to meet her. "I hope you like it as much as the last one."

"I'm sure I will." He said waiting until she had taken her seat on the couch before sitting down on the floor in front of it, just to the side of her legs.

"Hey," Remus Lupin came walking in looking concerned.

"What's up moony?" Peter quipped, seemingly astute for once.

"I just came from the library and well…okay this is going to sound completely foolish but you girls didn't tell anyone that Lily and I were dating or anything, like as a practical joke or something?"

The four Gryffindor girls looked confused.

"No we haven't." Dorcas replied looking at Lily and then at Remus. "Why?"

"Well it's just I was in the library doing research for Slughorns' paper when these blokes from Ravenclaw went walking by." Remus looked more than a little uncomfortable now. "And well they made some stupid comments. I'm sure they didn't mean anything by it."

"What did they say Moony?" James asked from the floor already cracking open the book Lily had loaned him. "It had to have been something or you wouldn't have mentioned it."

"I'd really rather not repeat it James." Remus said after a moments' hesitation, now looking more uncomfortable than ever.

His response caused James to lift his head up and look at him worriedly.

"No way Lupin, you don't come in asking questions like that without providing an explanation." Alice prodded grinning impishly.

Remus continued to look uncomfortable and it was Lily who broke the silence.

"They said things about you sleeping with me didn't they?"

All eyes turned to her in astonishment.

"I'm right aren't I?" She pressed.

Remus nodded slowly.

"But why would they make comments about you and Remus?" Marlene asked her eyes on Dorcas whose expression was unreadably blank.

"Because they've been talking about me and all the Marauders."

"Even Peter?" Sirius squeaked incredulously.

The others just shot him nasty looks before turning back to Lily.

Lily continued picking at the fringe on the cushion she was holding. "You guys haven't heard it because we've almost always been going around in groups lately. But the past few times I've gone for a run or went to the loo or the library on my own they've been saying things to me. The worst ones are about James, but they've said things about all the boys."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Alice demanded.

"It wasn't important." Lily replied calmly giving her friend a don't-get-too-worked-up look.

"But why would they say those things about you?" James demanded looking furious.

Lily shrugged. "I'm assuming it was mostly the Slytherin girls who started them."

"What exactly have they been saying?" Sirius demanded looking nearly as furious as James now.

"It doesn't matter." She answered taking a deep breath.

"It does to us." Her friends all chorused.

Lily shook her head refusing to answer. It was stupid anyway. She hadn't really minded what they were saying other than the fact that it sort of hurt that people could so hastily jump to false conclusions about her character. She had worked hard to have a good reputation over the years and it seemed that all it took to tear that down was a dose of plain old-fashioned jealousy on the part of women.

"Well what exactly did they say to you Moony?" Sirius demanded and all eyes shot to Remus.

Remus sighed, "They asked me if she was as good as she looked and one of them made some comment about me paying her for her services. Then Walton said that if I wanted to share her with them sometime they wouldn't mind having a little fun."

"What pigs." Dorcas growled.

"Assholes you mean." Marlene corrected.

"Assholes isn't strong enough Marli I was thinking of something more like…"

"Alice please." Lily interjected. "You're all making more out of this than there has to be. If I can ignore them I don't see why you all can't."

"Because we are your friends, that's why." Alice retorted.

"Besides they are picking on you specifically Lily and you know it. If this was about jealousy when it comes to the Marauders they would be making the same comments to Marli and Alice." Dorcas argued.

"And you." Remus shot in giving her a look.

"Yes well…" Dorcas continued, her cheeks going slightly pink. "What I mean to say is they are singling you out specifically."

"She's right Lily." Marlene agreed. "They are picking on you because you are muggleborn."

"You guys it's not a big deal. I mean who cares if some Slytherin idiot asks me if I like it rough?"

"I do."

The rest of her friends fell silent as James turned about once more to look her in the eye.

"I don't care if you want to ignore it Lily, I won't. If I hear even one stupid comment about you I'm telling you right now I can't be held responsible for my actions."

"James..."

"No. I'm not going to be swayed on this and you know why. I'm not going to say it but you know why." He insisted firmly. "So those prats just better hope I'm not in hearing distance if they try this shit again, and from now on for at least the next few weeks I don't want you going around alone with jerks like Walton saying those things about you. That guy is bad news."

"I'm not a child you know." She retorted feeling oddly irritated at his overt display of protectiveness.

"No you aren't." James said still looking directly at her. "But I do consider you my friend, whether or not you've grown to consider me the same, and I don't take it well when people treat my friends badly. I don't want you getting hurt just because other people don't know how to act with decency."

He and Lily stared at each other warring silently before Lily looked away. She felt somewhat overwhelmed by what she saw in James' eyes. She knew without a doubt that, what she saw there was one of the reasons she had been careful about getting close to him too quickly. And after her dream the other night she knew she was nowhere near ready for the depth of emotion that looked back at her.

"If I promise I won't go off alone can we please just drop this subject for good? Or at least for tonight?" She said sounding tired.

James nodded still looking tense. He held up her book and said as calmly as he could manage.

"Thanks for this. I'm going to turn in but I'll get it back to you as soon as I'm done."

Lily grinned, amused despite what they'd talked about, that he was so excited to get through the next book.

"There's no rush you know."

"Easy for you to say, you already know what happens." He answered back heading for the stairs.

She frowned when he was out of sight, feeling out of her element when it came to him.

"He is like that with all of us you know?" Sirius told her softly, as the rest of their friends struck up a conversation about the upcoming quidditch match.

"You shouldn't take it personally. I mean he is insanely protective of you but it is in his nature to defend his friends like that." Sirius went on. "Once in second year he socked this big sixth year Slytherin bloke, you remember the one who looked like a gargoyle, despite the fact that the guy was twice his size and it was all because he had made some comment about me being a…well to soften it up a bit…a wimp, because I hadn't taken up my family's course in life and devoted myself to the dark arts and pure-blood supremacy. At the time I was more embarrassed than mad to be called out like that by someone so much older than me but James took care of it. He just got up from where we were sitting by the lake and leveled one at the big guy."

Lily smiled softly.

"I remember hearing some story about James attacking a giant. Back then I just chalked it up to an over-exaggerated rumor and James' ego needing more inflation."

Sirius smiled back.

"Well it was true. I mean we took off fast as lightning after he did it, afterall the bloke and his friends were four years older than us and rather mean, but that night all I can remember thinking is that if it meant I got to keep a friend like James, there was no way in hell I was ever going back to my parents way of thinking. And that was only one example, with James there are likely thousands but for the sake of keeping things simple we'll say hundreds upon hundreds."

Lily chuckled.

"Thanks Sirius."

He nodded and calling to Remus and Peter made his way up the boys' staircase.

His friends followed shortly after and soon the girls went up as well. Later on all the sixth years were sleeping soundly but one.

James Potter was still awake and couldn't help but keep replaying what Lily had said over and over and over again in his head. He finally fell asleep sometime in the early morning hours vowing to make sure he dealt properly with the next bloke who dared to slander her.

****

That following Saturday marked the first quidditch game of the season and while James was giving the team encouragement over breakfast Sirius nearly choked on his pumpkin juice when he saw the girls walk in.

"Holy Hippogriffs McKinnon you've outdone yourself this time." He said hoarsely.

"I'm a clever wench aren't I?" She chuckled softly pulling Lily, whose arms were locked tightly about her middle scrunching up her shirt, along behind her.

James looked up from talking to one of their chasers, a fifth year by the name of Eckerly, his eyes widening in shock. His teammates including Frank Longbottom and Alice's cousin Gideon followed suit.

"What do you think?" Marlene asked turning about so that he could get the full effect of her shirt.

It was a plain, short-sleeved, scarlet t-shirt but in big, gold, eye-catching lettering it read across the front.

**Not Only Can He Tap It, He Hits It Hard! **And on the back it had Sirius' last name in an arc across the top and his number in gold beneath it.

Alice's was similar only the front read, **In Gryffindor We Score More!** While the back just held the picture of a winking Lion and the word Gryffindor at the top.

"Aren't they great?"

Sirius was chuckling and nodding enthusiastically. "I love it." He replied. "If we win you'll have to wear them to all the games this season."

Lily groaned loudly and let her forehead hit the table.

Alice smiled but said sympathetically, "I think Lily's is the worst of the lot."

Marlene laughed, "She means the best! Come on Lily show the boys your shirt before they have to leave."

Lily lifted her head and glared fiercely at Marlene.

"Please, for me." Marlene pleaded pouting theatrically and clapping when Lily stood from the table and let her arms drop to reveal her shirt front.

James followed Sirius' example and choked on his pumpkin juice.

"Oh Merlin." He said softly reading the words again just to be sure he hadn't imagined it.

Nope he hadn't. On the front of Lily's shirt in the same bold lettering as the other two it read, **No Matter How Tight A Squeeze, He Always Gets It In!**

"Turn about Lily let them see the back." Marlene encouraged.

Red in the face Lily complied and James was relieved to see it was the same as Marlene's but instead it had James' last name and number on it, something that made him feel not just slightly pleased.

"Where on earth would you come up with an idea like this McKinnon?" James asked trying not to look at Lily for fear that he would break into a smile or, Godric forbid, laughter.

"Well I started with Alice's and originally I had planned to put Gideon's number on it but then when I realized the implication I thought that wouldn't be all that appropriate as that seemed incestuous. I didn't think about…" she paused eyeing Frank for a second, before continuing, "well anyway I just made hers for Gryffindor in general. Then I made mine and since you're a beater I thought it would be funny to make one that went along with your position and I came up with this. Now by that time I was really on a roll so when I got to Lily's I thought about James being a chaser and being in tough situations and then I thought about how he always manages to score anyway and voila! I'm a genius I know."

"I have to admit they are pretty… um I guess creative is the word I'm looking for." Gideon supplied unable to keep the smile from his face.

"Thanks." Marlene grinned, turning her attention to her breakfast.

After taking another minute to compose himself enough to not laugh James cleared his throat and informed his team it was time to head to the pitch.

"If it's any consolation Evans," he whispered quietly as he passed behind her, leaning down so that she could hear him. "You look absolutely gorgeous today."

Lily couldn't help but smiled as he walked away. Sometimes it felt like James knew exactly what she needed to hear. She busied herself with consuming her usual tower of waffles, now at least looking forward to the game somewhat.

Later that day after Gryffindor's spectacular win over Ravenclaw, Sirius decided that the shirts were definitely good luck and that the girls would most certainly have to wear them for the rest of the games, Lily just sighed in surrender.

****

**By the way I'll recognize everyone who reviewed in the next chapter I promise :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note,**

**This may be the longest chapter yet! And just to let everybody know I've decided to include the date and day at the top of a section every now and then just so you know where we are chronologically :) Also as to the Christmas gifts Lily and James exchange...I wasn't really sure how James had come into possession of them but I decided for the sake of having Lily give him something interesting to let them be from her. And as for James' gift to Lily, while it may be over the top it plays a role in parts of the story that come later. **

**By the way let me know what you think of how Lily and James' relationship is developing, too fast? too slow? Any suggestions or comments are welcome :)**

**Thanks to Tanja88, and shroomy-eyes for reviewing! **

**Hope you all enjoy and remember to Review!**

Christmas Kisses

The rest of November seemed to fly by for the eight Gryffindor's and despite their best efforts to keep focused on classes it wasn't long before snow blanketed the ground and they had no choice but to partake in the world of white that was now the castle grounds.

Though she hadn't told Alice about it, Lily eventually had to accept the fact that her dream about her and James was destined to be a recurring one. She knew it was stupid but something inside her was fighting everything that dream made her feel with all it had. She just couldn't bring herself to admit that she was beginning to think of James in anything but mildly friendly terms for the time being. Yet she knew even that was beginning to become a lie. If she was honest with herself she would have to say that she and James were getting to be more that just mildly friendly with each other. He was truly becoming one of the people she felt were important to her…and Merlin help her so were Sirius, Remus and Peter (though, admittedly, Remus had been somewhat of a friend before she had decided to give James a chance that year).

She knew it was odd but something about the whole being friends with James thing still unnerved her a bit. Despite his being on such good behavior, and making her happy more often than not, she just couldn't shake the feeling of worry she had about letting herself become too attatched to him.

James for his part was glowing. He was finally getting to not only spend time with Lily but really let her get to know him as well. They had continued their Friday library meetings whenever possible and James had taken them as opportunities to let Lily see the side of him she hadn't in years prior. He gave her details about his life that he sometimes regretted later, often wondering what she thought of him for it. Yet, she seemed to appreciate his honesty and sometimes even told him a few things he didn't know about her. Things in his opinion were definitely looking up.

Before they all knew it the Christmas holiday was upon them and they found themselves boarding the train for home. Surprisingly, or perhaps not surprisingly if you knew the Marauders well enough, the four boys followed the girls into their compartment and the eight students soon found out just how 'close' friends could be.

Peter lounged on the floor while Remus, Dorcas and Alice occupied one bench. James, Sirius and Marlene occupied the other while Lily sat on the floor on the opposite side of the compartment from Peter.

"Are you sure you don't want to sit up here?" James asked Lily for what had to be the fifth time.

"Positive." She answered with a smile.

"So what are everybody's plans for break?" Alice asked.

It was then revealed that everyone was pretty much spending the holiday at home with their parents other than Sirius who would of course be spending his with James' family.

"So is your sister coming home or what Lils?" Dorcas questioned.

Lily looked up at her and decided not to comment on how close Dorcas sat next to Remus despite the fact that there was enough room for them to spread out a little.

"I'm sure she will. She's been bragging to mum about that boyfriend of hers; you know the one I told you about. Personally I don't know what she sees in him, but Pet and I haven't seen things similarly for a long while now."

Everyone knew how Lily's sister viewed her magical abilities and about their difficulties getting along.

"I only hope one day we can be as close as we once were you know?" Lily added trying to be positive.

"What about you Marlene is the whole brood going to be there?" Alice smirked.

Marlene had three little sisters and two little brothers, only the oldest of which Alasdair was old enough to attend Hogwarts and he was a second year.

"Of course," Marlene replied. "I don't know what my mum was thinking. Having me and then waiting four years before my brother and then deciding to have four more in quick succession. The only thing I can think of is that once she realized how wonderful a child I was she decided to have another, but unfortunately found out, after trying five times, that you just can't replicate this kind of perfection."

"She's like my cousin Molly." Alice put in. "Gideon's older sister. She's already got three little one's with Arthur Weasley and Gideon reckons they aren't likely to stop any time soon."

They spent the remainder of the train ride discussing family and plans to owl. Frank dropped by near the end to wish everyone a good holiday but they could all tell he was really there for Alice, who was positively beaming by the time Frank disappered from view. When the train rolled to a stop in Kings Cross they all gathered their things up and began to file out. Being the closest to the window Lily and James were the last two to leave and before she could exit the compartment James grabbed her wrist stopping her.

"I wanted to give you something." He said sounding shy and somewhat nervous. "It's not a big deal or anything just a Christmas present."

"Am I allowed to open it now or do I have to wait for Christmas?"

She watched as James fished out a small box from his pocket. It was wrapped in white paper and tied with an emerald ribbon. He placed it on her outstretched palm gently and with a smile.

"You have to wait for Christmas of course."

As Lily looked into his eyes she got the whooshing sensation that she had gotten long ago at this very same train station at the beginning of the term. She swallowed suddenly feeling hot and nervous.

"I didn't get you anything though." She said her voice sounding odd.

"That's okay. I didn't expect anything." He replied his voice coming out thickly.

_What is the matter with us?_ Lily thought wildly.

"Thankyou James." She said finally as the silence had stretched out heavily between them.

"Your welcome Lily."

****

Thursday, December 23

It was two days before Christmas and Lily had decided to venture into Diagon Alley to do some last minute shopping for her friends. She had chosen to come alone as she would only be there for a few hours at most. She had decided that very morning that it didn't sit well with her that James had given her a present, even now it sat perfectly wrapped and looking far too enticing under her tree, and she had not given him one. So she set off looking for something small to go along with Marlene's gift and something fairly good to give to James.

She passed store after store after finding Marlene's gift but couldn't find what she was looking for until she remembered something she had seen in an old wizarding antique shop, it had been pretty expensive but she counted out her money and realized she could manage it, but barely. The old crone in the store wrapped it up prettily for her and even gave her a small card upon which she could write a message, which she decided on a whim to do before sealing it and putting it in a bag along with the wrapped box. She thanked the woman and then made her way out onto the street and headed for the bookstore.

As she was walking out without having bought anything as her savings had been used up on the last part of Marlene's gift and the one she had gotten James, she wasn't looking where she was going and she collided with the customer about to make his way into the shop.

"Oh I'm terribly sorry I wasn't…" she faltered, grabbing onto the strong pair of arms that caught her, as she looked up into a startlingly familiar face.

"No problem at all." He replied grinning widely.

Recognition seemed to dawn in his eyes as he looked pointedly at her red hair and green eyes and his look turned positively mischievous, leaving Lily without a doubt of who he was.

She stared at him feeling overwhelmed.

"I…that is to say you…wow…huh.." She floundered. It was like they were different aged twins or something.

The man laughed at her confusion just as a voice called loudly.

"Dad you'll never believe the new arm guards they had in Quality Quidditch Supplies I…" James trailed off as he saw who his father was standing next to.

"Lily?!" He said sounding dumbstruck. "I…what are you doing with my dad?"

Lily jumped out of James' fathers hold quickly and shrugged, her stomach doing a weird sort of fluttering dance, similar to how it had felt twice before at the train station, at the sight of James.

"I sort of ran into him on my way out of the store."

James looked up to see the sign hanging above the establishment. He looked back at her with a grin.

"Find anything good?"

Lily smiled in return. She loved that he was just as avid a reader as she was.

"As a matter of fact I did. Morrison has out a new one that I've been waiting for for ages."

"I know the one. I've been checking back here by owl every couple weeks but they hadn't received it yet."

"Well it's here now." She answered back wistfully, shifting the two bags she carried from the arm on which she carried her purse to the other one.

"Here let me get those." James offered stepping forward.

"Oh that's alright, they aren't at all heavy, and I was just headed out anyway."

James let his arms fall to his sides awkwardly and then ran a hand through his hair.

His father took that moment to ask politely.

"Are you meeting your mother or father somewhere?"

Lily turned to him still feeling strange at how closely father and son resembled one another. She was also floored by the fact that Jason Potter while nearly the exact same height as his son, was an absolutely gorgeous man. He resembled James so closely and still looked so young yet he had gained a more mature look to his features with age and his build was, well she hated to admit it but it was nothing short of remarkable. She remembered that he was an auror and figured that must explain his physique as most of them were in top condition. Without a doubt James' father was stunningly handsome, much like his son. The only physical difference apart from his father being more solid, appeared to be their eye color. James' were brown while his father's were blue.

"Oh…um no sir, actually I came alone. My parents, well they are both muggles and my sister, who is also a muggle, is visiting and I'm sorry to admit I was looking for a chance to get out of the house to…well to be honest to avoid her for a few hours, as awful as that sounds, and it's usually easier if I come alone anyway. You see if I bring my mum she wants to spend the whole day in the menagerie or the owl emporium looking at the animals and if I bring my dad he wants to either buy every magical item in sight or browse the quidditch shop for hours, despite his limited knowledge of the sport."

Mr. Potter smiled at her explanation and then frowned slightly.

"So you mean to say you aren't here with friends or parents? No one is here to see that you make it home alright?"

Lily shook her head shifting her weight from foot to foot as she sometimes did when nervous.

"In these times I really don't feel comfortable letting a friend of James' head home alone. I would really rather James and I escort you there."

James nodded his agreement adding hurriedly, "It's no trouble Lily really and he's right, with everything that's been going on in the wizarding world lately it really isn't a good idea for you to be out on your own."

Lily was about to protest and explain that she truly didn't live too far away, it was only a short train ride and a short walk, when James father added seriously,

"I'm not taking no for an answer so it looks like you get to spend the next hour with James and I as we finish our shopping, if that fits your schedule that is, and then we shall escort you back home."

Lily opened her mouth to argue once more but she was cut off again as James grabbed her hand and tugged her back toward the bookshop.

"Come on and show me where that new book is."

Lily soon found herself thoroughly enjoying the time she spent with James and his father. It turned out Jason was just as much of a reader as his son. After they were through in the bookstore they headed back to the quidditch store so James could show his father the arm guards he had been admiring and then it was on to the Leaky Cauldron where James' father insisted on buying them a late lunch before they took Lily home.

****

When Lily excused herself to use the loo Jason used the opportunity to slug his son firmly on the shoulder.

"Way to go James. Man is she beautiful. All this time you've been raving about her I never realized it all might actually be true."

James smiled at his dad, rubbing his bruised arm lightly, thankful that his father had finally met the goddess he'd been mooning over for years. And he had to admit spending the afternoon with her, even with his father in tow had been extremely enjoyable.

"I told you she was wonderful. Now you see why I've been pining like an idiot for the longest time."

Jason Potter nodded, "Well worth the idiocy son."

"By the way I wanted to thank you." James added seriously. "For not teasing me in front of her or making it weird today that is."

While they had always been close, and he knew his dad wouldn't deliberately sabotage his chances with Lily, James also knew his dad sometimes possessed a sense of humor similar to Sirius' and that all too often it led to his teasing James in public.

"No problem kiddo." His dad replied lifting his butterbeer to his lips and taking a long swallow. "Maybe if I'd met her sooner I wouldn't have given you such a hard time at home."

"Yeah right." James scoffed as his Dad winked at him cheekily.

"Now I see why you've been waiting to get laid all this time…" Jason remarked teasingly and James flushed beet red.

"Merlin Dad could we not bring that up?"

Jason was still laughing when Lily came back and took her seat.

"Did I miss something?" She asked confused.

Jason smirked impishly and answered, "Not at all. So have we decided what we want to eat?"

As they were finishing their meal, a rather good one in everyone's opinion, a man came to speak with James' dad. He was somewhere in his forties with brown hair and light blue eyes. His demeanor was rather haughty and he wore fancy looking robes that looked out of place in the small pub.

"Potter I'd been meaning to have a word with you." The man stated firmly steering himself into the empty seat next to Jason.

"What about Lionel?"

"Well as you know our two families have been in contact for ages and, being such upstanding members of wizarding society, I have been approached by Madam LeVrallin who would like to know if we would speak on behalf of her social society about the issues we've been having as of late. She would be more than pleased if you would agree and I've said I'm more than willing if you are."

"I'm not sure I understand. Madam LeVrallin chairs the Society for the Advancement of Magical Medicine, I'm not sure how anything I have to say is related." Jason replied.

"She wants us to address the growing issue of the war, if that is what this situation comes to, and the measures we wizards can take to help ourselves be protected in the event of an emergency. As you are an auror and I am a ministry official she would like us both to provide our opinion on what steps would best be taken in such a situation. She herself will describe the medical precautions."

"When is this to take place?"

"Next Thursday in the meeting hall in St. Mungos."

"I'll have to check with my wife but I'm sure I could fit that in." Jason replied with a nod.

"Splendid." Lionel remarked beaming widely, his gaze then shifted to James. "Is this your son then? My I haven't seen him in quite some time. He's the spitting image of you old fellow."

Jason grinned, "So I've been told."

James dipped his head at the man in acknowledgement, he remembered him from a few years before when they had been introduced at some stuffy ministry party his parents had dragged him to, he wasn't overly fond of the bloke. Lionel's gaze moved on to Lily.

"And this here, is this your girlfriend then James?"

"This is James' friend Lily from school." Jason supplied his smile genuine.

"Ah pleasure to meet you my dear. What surname do you hold girl?"

Lily smiled, "Evans sir."

The man nodded. "Related to Felrik Evans are you? Good wizard he is."

She shook her head. "No sir. I'm muggleborn you see."

James held his breath knowing suddenly how the man was going to react.

Lionel froze. There was no other way to describe it. Once second he was a jumble of movement waiving his hands and shifting around and shaking his head this way and that and the next he was still as a stone.

He stared at Lily as if he weren't sure what to make of her, as if she had suddenly sprouted blue horns on the top of her head. James watched as Lily blushed crimson but managed to hold his gaze.

"Well that's…hmmm." Lionel hedged. "And you're a friend of James' you say?"

Lily frowned as he asked the question as if he no longer believed such a thing could be possible, despite the fact that she was indeed at lunch with James and his father. James knew she had been treated differently before because she was muggleborn and he knew that in some ways she was used to the prejudices of others but he felt responsible for the way she was being treated while in his and his father's company.

"That's right." James broke in firmly. "She's my friend. A very close friend as a matter of fact."

Lionel shifted his attention to James who sat across from him.

"Really? Well I daresay I never would have thought, well I mean you are a Potter after all it would be out of the question in regards to…I mean it is rather odd is it not, but then again there are all sorts of strange fashions flitting about these days. I suppose befriending someone less fortunate isn't so wondrously far-fetched." Lionel finally concluded.

James face was a mask of anger as he looked at the man. He couldn't believe that he had the nerve to practically insult Lily as she was sitting in front of him. He had always known that if by some miracle she were to one day spend time with him, or Godric help him become his girlfriend, that there would be more than a few individuals who would deem it their right to voice an opinion on the matter. He just hadn't realized that such an occurrence would cause him to feel so overwhelmingly protective and on the defensive.

It was Lily who dragged his attention away from scowling at the man as she rose from the table as calmly as she could.

"If you would all excuse me please." Her voice was shaky but the words were clear as day.

"Lily please I…" James began standing suddenly.

"It's alright James. I'll wait for you outside okay." She answered back softly, gripping his arm in reassurance as she moved past him to head for the door. As she dissappeared James heard her mutter quietly, "The 'less fortunate' needs some air."

"Well I daresay what a strange creature. It seems something must have upset her." Lionel muttered.

James turned back to the table and looked at his father to judge his reaction. Jason looked every bit as irritated as his son.

"It's apparent that what upset her was your treating her as if she were beneath you, as if she weren't normal." James fumed trying to keep his voice as level as possible to avoid drawing unwanted attention. "I'll have you know that I'm dead set on marrying that girl someday and by then you had better have learned how to not hurt her feelings or so help me I'll make you sorry. Dad, if you'll excuse me I'll be outside."

As James stalked off his father grinned in approval.

"Do you approve of this Jason? Of your son wanting to _marry_ that muggle chit?"

Jason turned to the other man still grinning widely, "Wholeheartedly. I believe my son has made a fine choice in that young woman, even if she is unaware of it yet, and I'll be more than happy to welcome her into the Potter family with open arms. Now if we are finished here I'll pay my tab and be on my way,"

As he stood and strolled away the stricken look was still planted firmly on Lionel's face.

***

James found Lily outside leaning against the brick wall of the building to the right of the Leaky Cauldron. He walked up to her feeling embarrassed and outraged and more sorry than he could say and he realized that if he was feeling all of that he couldn't imagine what Lily must be feeling.

She turned to look at him as he came closer but before he could say anything she put her hand over his mouth.

"Before you even begin to start apologizing, and I know you were I can tell by that look on your face, I want you to know it doesn't matter. I don't care what some old barmy wizard thinks of me; it was just difficult is all. I mean that's the first time I've heard an actual adult behave as if I were a lesser person but I'm fine now, really. And I want to tell you thankyou for sticking up for me in there because I know you did. It means a lot to me that you value my friendship so much and that you don't care about how good or bad my blood is. I think the world of you for that. And I wanted to say thankyou for today. I had a great time with you and your dad and I appreciate you both looking out for me. What I'm trying to say is you're a great friend James, you really are." She smiled at him and let the words hang between them for a moment then said softly. "Okay I'm going to let you go now."

James couldn't explain later what came over him but at that moment looking at Lily as she smiled up at him, after she'd called him her friend, her green eyes sparkling, he found he couldn't stop himself from leaning down, cupping her jaw, and capturing her lips with his. It wasn't a lusting kiss or an overly physical one and it certainly wasn't lengthy, but it rocked James to his toes just the same. As he moved his lips over hers, admiring their fullness and softness, he knew without a doubt that his heart hadn't led him astray. This was exactly where he was meant to be and who he was meant to be with.

Exiting the Leaky Cauldron Jason looked to his right turned around and walked back inside. His cheeks protested he was smiling so widely but he couldn't help it.

"Forget something Mr. Potter?" The barkeep asked him curiously.

"Not at all." He grinned. "I'm just giving my son some privacy. He's outside kissing the girl of his dreams, I wouldn't want to interrupt that."

The man smiled back at him, "Certainly not sir."

****

As she walked up the front lane of her house Lily was more than slightly aware of James standing next to her. Every one of her senses was still on high alert from the kiss before.

When James had pulled away and slowly dropped his hand neither of them had managed to say anything yet she knew that somehow he had managed to show her, in that one simple yet oh-so-complicated kiss, exactly what it was that he had been waiting for for the past few years. Their kiss had been so much _more_ than she had ever experienced and yet it hadn't even been more than the tender meeting of their lips. The strength of it, and the force behind it scared the daylights out of her.

When his father had come back outside he had found them still staring at one another and still just as silent. The ride on the train (which despite the awkwardness James and his father seemed to enjoy) to her stop had then flown by, even with James' father making a lot of polite conversation, and now suddenly she was standing in front of her door looking at James, whose hands were shoved awkwardly into his pockets, as if she weren't sure of anything anymore. She was truly thankful his dad had chosen to wait for him up the road to allow them to say their goodbyes.

Finally James sighed, "Look Lily, I'm sorry if what I did has upset you and I'm even sorrier if it has made things weird between us. But I'm not sorry I did it because honestly I don't know how or why I did it right then anyway. I just want you to know that no matter what you think about it or how you react to it I'm here and… I'm your friend."

His words seemed to pull Lily out of her trance. After a moment she managed to grin shakily at him as she reached into the smaller of her two bags.

"Here." She said holding out his still beautifully wrapped gift, the card lying flat against the top. "It's for you. I bought it today before I ran into your dad. I was going to owl it to you but…" she shrugged, "you might as well take it home with you."

"I told you I didn't expect anything in return." He said taking the small gift in an almost reverent manner.

"Well I can't return it so you'll have to take it." She lied. "Besides I'm pretty damn positive you are going to love it so…just thank me when you realize how absolutely wonderful I am."

"I already know how absolutely wonderful you are." He replied his cheeks turning pink. "And I'm sure I'll love it so thankyou."

Lily nodded blushing slightly.

"Well then, I guess I'll see you at the start of term. That is if I don't go slamming into your dad again."

James nodded. "See you then."

He watched as she opened her door and walked into her house closing it softly behind her. Then he calmly made his way back down the walk and all the way down the lane to where his father was standing before he lost his composure.

He grabbed his fathers shoulder in a vice-like grip and asked dazedly,

"Am I dreaming, I have to be right? I mean I honest to Gryffindor think I kissed Lily Evans today and I'm still standing here in one piece. I haven't been slapped, kicked, cursed, dismembered, hexed or punched and I…Oh sweet Merlin Dad I kissed Lily Evans didn't I?"

Jason was laughing uncontrollably as he answered his son.

"You damn well did James. You damn well did."

***

Christmas day in the Potter house was a lively affair with James and Sirius, who had decided to attend the Potter's Christmas instead of his own family's for the third year in a row, sitting on the floor tearing into their presents with vigor and showing them off to each other. Jason and Charlotte watched them with amusement from the couch as the mound of wrapping paper grew higher and higher.

"Oh Merlin Padfoot look at this!" James shouted suddenly, holding up the brand new arm guards he had been admiring only a few days before. "Mom, Dad wow, I really don't know what to say."

Charlotte leaned forward kissing James on the top of his head, "Well your father insisted that you couldn't take your eyes off them at first so we decided one more present wouldn't hurt."

Sirius gasped as he opened his next gift and found similar items but made with a different material designed specifically for a beater.

"I…I can't accept these." He breathed handling them lovingly.

"Of course you can. They are a gift from us to you and it would hurt our feelings if you decided not to accept them." Jason supplied. "Now try them on lets make sure they fit."

Sirius and James both did so quickly grinning at each other like mad as they showed them off. James was still admiring his when Sirius tossed him a small flat present.

"Looks like that's the last of it Prongs." He said admiring his huge stack of gifts.

James stared at the gift, remembering that he had placed it under the tree as soon as he had come home from dropping Lily off. He pulled the card from the top and stared at it in wonder for a moment before tearing it open and reading her message.

_Dear James,_

_Happy Christmas! I saw these while shopping and I thought of you. Try not to get into too much trouble with them and don't let me regret getting them for you. There are instructions on how they work taped to the bottom one. _

_Hope your holiday is going splendidly._

_Lily_

"For Godric's sake Prongs are you going to open it or just keep staring at the card? Who is it from anyway?"

James looked up realizing his family was waiting for him to open his last present.

"It's from Lily." He answered simply, hoping his voice didn't give away all the nervousness he was feeling.

Sirius grinned like a madman, while Charlotte and Jason traded meaningful looks.

"You got a Christmas gift from Lily?" Sirius chortled.

James nodded and began to carefully tear away the paper. Underneath he found two mirrors identical in shape and size.

"Maybe she thinks you need to spend more time on your appearance. I mean your hair is pretty atrocious you know." Sirius chuckled.

James shook his head, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"She said there were instructions…ah ha! Here they are. It says that these are enchanted mirrors. If you speak the name of the holder of the other mirror into the mirror you hold they will appear and you can talk with them no matter how far the distance."

"No way!" Sirius remarked his eyes already alight with endless possibilities. "Come on lets try them out. I'll go into the next room with one and you keep the other. When I get there I'll say your name and we'll see how this goes."

James nodded handing the top mirror over to Sirius. After his friend disappeared James waited and a moment later his mirror began to glow a bright blue before Sirius' voice was heard saying 'James'.

James looked down into the mirror and found himself staring at the face of his best friend.

"Merlin Padfoot they work!" He said excitedly.

"Damn right they do…Prongs can you imagine the uses for these things?"

"I know."

"I'm coming back. See you in a second." Sirius face disappeared as he lowered his mirror.

"Can you believe this?" James said turning to face his parents.

Jason grinned widely, understanding his son's overt excitement at the gift he'd been given.

"It is pretty great son. I can't believe Lily got them for you. I've been trying to get the auror department to invest in something like this for years but there has never been enough need or funding." His father replied.

"That girl must like you James." Charlotte added. "From what I hear those mirrors don't come cheap. I don't think they even make them anymore because there weren't many wizards buying them when they did. We're old fashioned I supposed and choose to stick to our owling. She had to have picked them up in an antique shop or something similar."

"Really?" James asked sounding worried that Lily had gone to so much trouble for his present.

"Who cares mate? The girl of your dreams, the one you imagine was yours only in your wildest most elaborate fantasies...

"Geez Padfoot."

"… just got us the most amazing present ever for Christmas, why bother with the particulars?" Sirius exclaimed coming back and sitting down in his original seat on the floor.

"I suppose you're right."

"Of course I'm right. Maybe all your hard work is paying off." Sirius replied nudging James with his elbow and winking at him cheekily.

James sighed but smiled shyly, "I guess now I can only hope she likes my present half as much as I like hers."

"Hey you never did tell me what you got her." Sirius prodded eyeing his best friend with interest.

James blushed slightly, knowing that once Sirius knew there would be no end to his amusement at James' expense.

"I'm sure you'll see it sooner or later." He replied feigning nonchalance.

"For the love of Helga Hufflepuff Prongs tell me you didn't. Please tell me you didn't." Sirius groaned.

James looked at him still somewhat flushed, "I would tell you that mate but you made me promise a long time ago never to lie to you."

***

Lily had been staring at the open box on her bed for at least a few hours. When James had given her the gift she had never expected to find something so… well extravagant was the only word she could think of. Her mother had gasped at the sight of it while they were opening their gifts and had immediately wanted to see it herself, but Lily hadn't been able to let the box out of reach much less take the item that was in it out.

She tried to look away from it once more but couldn't bring herself to keep her eyes from snapping right back to it after only a few seconds.

'For Merlin's sake Evans it's only a necklace." She scolded herself firmly.

But in reality it wasn't it was so very much more than that.

Sitting in the box, looking as innocent as could be imaginable, was a silver necklace. Hanging from the chain was a charm in the shape of a lily. What made it all the more remarkable though was that the lily's petals were made from intricately cut diamonds, who were tinged with the slightest shade of pink, while it's stem was crafted from the tiniest emeralds she'd ever seen, emeralds that Lily was almost positive matched the color of her eyes, and that made the flower all the more noticeable.

Steeling herself Lily reached down and ran her fingers over the beautiful charm. Perhaps if she took small steps, touching it, then holding it and then perhaps one day wearing it she might be able to handle it.

'What on Earth am I going to tell James.' She worried.

She had no idea what he meant giving her a gift like this. What on earth was she supposed to think?

She had known since that summer that James truly liked her, and wasn't just bent on impressing her in all the wrong ways, but for Merlin's sake that had only barely begun to seep in. She was still reeling from the thought that the guy who had once been on her top ten most hated list was now becoming a good friend of hers... was now on her list of guys that she had kissed, albeit briefly. She bit her bottom lip and sighed in frustration wondering how on earth she was ever going to get herself to take the damn thing out of the box.

***

"Hey kiddo you got a letter." Jason handed his son the sealed parchment that had come with the morning post.

James took it as he took his seat next to Sirius at the breakfast table. He opened it and smiled.

"It's from Lily."

Sirius swallowed his bacon quickly.

"Well…what does she have to say."

James read it himself and then, for Sirius' sake, began to read it out loud.

_Dear James, _

_I hope your holiday is going well. Christmas here was the usual affair. My parents were great as always but my sister brought her boyfriend over to show him off again. I think my Dad secretly wants to shoot him, at least that's the feeling I got when he began to talk of his plans to lay off workers in the company he works for. My mum had to break in and start serving dessert early to keep him calm. Apart from all the family fun however I've been having a great holiday._

_I know you probably don't want to hear this but I'm going to say it anyway because I feel I have to but just make sure you read the end of this letter before you write back okay?_

_The present you bought me was way too much. I can't believe you would go and spend that much money on me…that's just crazy because I know it was expensive. I mean you are seriously messed up in the head James Potter if you think that I'm going to just accept a gift like that without feeling guilty about it and without giving you a piece of my mind, which I will most certainly do once I see you again. So you had just better be prepared for it._

_However I would also like to state that…it's beautiful James. I couldn't even bring myself to touch it until I had stared at it for at least an hour or so (alright I admit it was more like three hours or so). It took me the whole day to get up the nerve to try it on. I've never owned anything like it in my life. I wore it down to breakfast this morning and every time my mum looks at me she breaks into the biggest smile I've ever seen, though she doesn't know who it's from still, and now that I've put it on I don't think I can bring myself to take it off, so I'll be honest with you. I love it. I absolutely without a doubt love it! I don't know what possessed you to buy it for me, or at least I don't yet understand what possessed you to get it for me but I know that it means a lot coming from you and that makes it all the more wonderful._

_Alright I'm rambling now, not that you aren't loving every second of it, so I'll let your owl head back to you. Thanks for letting me borrow him all the time by the way, and I'm sorry if he comes back spoiled. My mum can't help feeding and petting him all the time. (I think she may have even taken him on her daily walk this morning.) _

_Hope all is well and that you had a happy Christmas, tell Sirius I say hello._

_Yours, Lily_

James was grinning like an idiot by the time he finished reading it.

"So I suppose this means there will be no living with you over the next few days then?" Sirius drolled.

"What did you buy her James?" His mother asked curiously. "It seems it must have been something pretty outstanding if she's reacting the way she did."  
James blushed crimson.

"Nothing much…"  
"Oh please." Sirius broke in. "He spent nearly all the money he had wanted to use to buy those new arm and shin guards that's why he was pining for them for Christmas because he couldn't buy them for himself with only his Christmas money and he didn't want to ask you guys if he could dip into his other savings to pay for it."

"I didn't know you wanted the shin guards too." His dad remarked looking up from his breakfast surprised.

"It's no big deal really."

"Ya sure tell them what you got her mate." Sirius bullied.

"You are honestly a terrible best friend," James scowled at him but turned to his dad and said thickly, "Well we were walking in Hogsmeade and I passed this jewelry shop, Warnfleets I think it was called."James watched his mother raise her eyebrows at his father and continued on quickly, "So I dropped in and Padfoot was with me, and I saw this necklace I liked. Padfoot thought I would be crazy to buy it so I just walked out with him and came back later and got it myself is all."

"What sort of necklace was it?" His mother questioned her brown eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Ya James, what sort of necklace was it?" Sirius teased.

James mumbled something quietly.

"Ooh Charlotte I think I heard the word diamond's in there." Jason chuckled.

"All I caught was silver." She answered with a smirk.

Sirius rested his chin on his palm as he leaned toward them conspiratorially.

"You missed emeralds and the fact that it was shaped like a Lily." He supplied.

"Oh my no wonder the poor girl had a hard time accepting it." Charlotte laughed lightly.

James stood up his face crimson with embarrassment.

"You know what I'm full. I think I'll go to my room now, you all enjoy your laugh at my expense and I'll just be seeing you later."

As he walked away he heard Sirius tell his parents.

"You know some days I really think he's in love with her. Then sometimes I just think he's gone mad. You never know these days, I mean look at Dumbledore, bloody bonkers that bloke is."

***


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note:**

**Hey so here goes another chapter...Review Please, it makes me happy and more motivated to update faster ;-)**

**Hope you all are enjoying the story and as usual let me know if you have any comments, questions or suggestions. Also I've been thinking of posting a summary of the upcoming chapter on my profile page...what do you think?**

**Another Collision, A Birthday Bash and an Unexpected Setback**

Lily dashed toward the scarlet steam engine pulling her trunk along behind her. She was not just a little bit late, she was **really** late. Her mother hadn't woken her up in time and her dad had then proceeded to drive five under the limit all the way to the train station despite her pleas for him to hurry. So now here she was looking a complete mess, having worn the first thing she could find, and dragging her heavy trunk along in a desperate attempt to make it to the train in time.

She was nearing her destination when someone accidentally bumped into her sending her sprawling onto the concrete her things flying every which way.

"Oh dear I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" Lily pushed herself up off the ground and into a sitting position.

"Yes I'm fine." She answered back politely looking over her scraped up palms and the rip in her jeans.

"I take it you were running late. Here let me help you."

Lily looked up at the woman who was now rushing to cast summoning spells to collect all of her scattered belongings and stared. Merlin she was beautiful! Her hair was piled up on top of her head in an elegant manner and she wore clothes that while they looked casual were no doubt really expensive. The way she moved was so graceful it only made Lily feel all the more ridiculous for having gone flying through the air. But what really struck Lily about her was the fact that her hair, for all it's elegance, was the exact shade of red as her own and damn it if she didn't wish she could pull it off like the woman in front of her.

"Charlotte." A familiar voice suddenly rang out from behind Lily.

"Oh…Jason." The woman looked up from gathering Lily's things and into the eyes of none other than James' Dad.

"I got James all settled with Sirius what's…Lily?"He said in surprise as he looked down at the young woman still sitting dazed on the pavement.

"Lily?!" The woman gasped. "You mean I knocked over…but I didn't…"

Jason put an arm around his wife consolingly before leading her over to where Lily sat.

"I think I can guess what happened." He put in giving Lily a conspiratorial smirk.

"I didn't mean to send her crashing to the ground." Charlotte put in elbowing her husband playfully. "She was in such a hurry too I…"  
Lily jumped up just as a sharp whistle sounded throughout the station.

"Oh no...the train!" She breathed and reached for the bag Mrs. Potter was holding. "Thankyou so much for getting my things, and I'm terribly sorry to have run into you like that. And I'm even more sorry for being so rude and taking off like this but I'm afraid I'm about to be left behind."

Charlotte elbowed her husband again just as Lily was reaching for her trunk.

"Oh…right. Here let me get that for you. I can get it there faster." He supplied levitating it with his wand and directing it toward the train. Lily and Charlotte dashed off after him, Lily still trying to collect herself somewhat.

"I didn't really think this is how I would end up meeting you." Charlotte chuckled wryly.

"Huh?"

"Oh it's just that James, my son, has told us so much about you. I just always envisioned something a little more…graceful, on my part."

Lily laughed and smiled at Mrs. Potter brightly as they dashed toward the train.

"I don't know if I would have been able to handle meeting you, if you had seemed any more wonderful than you do right now." She supplied.

At that moment they approached the train that was just beginning to move forward and as Mr. Potter managed to get Lily's trunk onto the luggage compartment Lily went dashing off toward one of the passenger cars.

"It was wonderful meeting you Mrs. Potter!" She yelled as she ran. "And it was good to see you again Mr. Potter! Thankyou for all your help…" She latched on to the first handle available to her and pulled herself up onto the platform of the car.

She looked back and saw that James' parents were smiling and waving at her as the train disappeared from sight.

_What else am I going to get myself into today?_ She thought shaking her head at her crazy morning.

***

"So…" Jason drawled. "What's the verdict Char?"

His wife turned to him with a smile.

"She said I was wonderful. And she's so polite. And Merlin is she beautiful and…"

Jason covered his wife's mouth with his hand.

"So I take it you like her then? I told you that would be the case."

Charlotte nodded and gently pulled his hand away.

"I like her very much. Did you see she was wearing the necklace?"

***

Lily approached the compartment that her friends were all occupying and found Sirius and Remus sitting on James' chest and legs as he lay struggling on the floor.

"Hi." She said sounding out of breath. "What's going on?"

"Lily!" Alice shrieked throwing herself at her best friend. "The boys were just having a debate as to whether or not to go and look for you."

"Lily." James sat up suddenly throwing Remus and Sirius to the ground. "You're here."  
"See," Sirius supplied standing up huffily. "I told you she was alright." Then Sirius looked over at Lily and his eyes widened. "What the hell happened to you?"

Lily frowned and moved past the boys to take a seat on the floor near the window, as she had on the way home for the Christmas holiday.

"For your information Black I ran into James' mother." She supplied trying to flatten her hair, straighten her shirt and examine the rip in her pants.

"James' mother did that to you?" Sirius questioned sitting down next to Marlene.

"No...I mean yes…well that is…I mean sort of..." Lily supplied digging through her bag to find a hair brush.

"So you met my mum then?" James asked cautiously taking the seat behind Lily's head.

"Yes I did. I didn't expect her to be so…" Lily searched for the right words.

"Foxy?" Sirius supplied.

"Padfoot!" James chided. "Please this is my mum we're talking about."

"I know mate and if she weren't your mother you'd be the first to admit she's damn sexy. Even Remus will say so." Sirius looked to him questioningly.

Remus shrugged, "Your mum is pretty gorgeous James."

"Try like absolutely knock-out beautiful. If she weren't married to your dad mate and I were older oh Merlin I'd…"

"Padfoot I swear if you make one more comment about my mum being anything other than a great cook I'm going to come over there and beat the shit out of you!" James growled.

Sirius held up his hands in surrender and tried to look innocent while their friends laughed.

"Your mom is really gorgeous James. You have to admit it. But then again your mom is a lucky woman as well." Marlene said and looked at Dorcas and Alice grinning mischievously. "I mean have you seen his dad? It's like James, with blue eyes and lots of muscle. I used to love spending time at James' house when I was little just to see his dad."

"For the love of Rowena Ravenclaw can we please stop discussing how attractive my parents are?" James pleaded.

"Fine mate but all were saying is it's easy to see why they can't keep their hands off of each other all the time. Besides, Lily's the one who brought it up." Sirius teased.

Lily scowled as she finally managed to free her hairbrush from the tangle of items taking up residence in her bag. "I did not. I was going to say I didn't expect his mom to be so open and likeable."

"What did you expect?" James asked taking the brush from her hand.

"I can do that." Lily said, turning about to look at him.

"I know." He replied pulling her about until her back rested between his legs. "Now answer the question."

Lily sighed as he began brushing the tangles out of her hair, rather carefully it seemed like.

"I don't know I guess you just always hear horror stories about meeting guys' mothers for the first time and she was nothing like that at all. I would have thought she would have been more reserved or something."

"So what happened exactly? I mean I'm pretty sure my mum isn't the type to just throw you down onto the pavement." James asked.

Lily looked at her scraped up palms again frowning as she thought over her answer.

"We sort of ran into each other." She admitted bashfully.

"Again? I mean isn't that how you met my dad too?" James teased.

Dorcas laughed and broke in, "Wait. You mean Lily ran into your dad when she first met him too? Like literally ran into them both?"

"He was really very nice about it." Lily blushed further.

"Of course he was. He probably looked at you and saw a younger version of his wife. It probably took him back to his Hogwarts days." Sirius chuckled.

"Wait go back to the you ran into him part…is he as solid as he looks?" Marlene asked grinning evilly.

"Yea Lily," Alice added. "I mean all that muscle it must have been like running into a wall. Did he put his arms around you to catch you?"

"Ooh did you get a good look at his eyes?" Dorcas added. "I love blue eyes."

Lily smiled at her friends even though she could feel James bristling behind her.

"I didn't look at him all that closely," She replied evenly. "Besides blue eyes aren't my thing."

She didn't have to look behind her to know James was smiling widely now. Her friends exchanging looks of interest said enough. She changed the topic to what everyone did over the holiday and was grateful when the others took off exchanging stories and laughing at one another.

After a while James leaned down and handed her the brush back.

"Oh thanks." She said taking it and placing it back in the bag.

She hadn't realized she'd let him sit and run his fingers through her hair for a long while after he'd finished brushing it.

James smiled and answered back softly into her ear, "I should be the one thanking you for being so wonderful."

Lily bit her bottom lip to keep from grinning and turned her attention once again to the stories being exchanged.

She supposed that one good thing about her colliding with James' mum was that it distracted them both from their last encounter with one another. Lily had wondered for the briefest of moments when looking at James again, if he had replayed their kiss outside the Leaky Cauldron in his mind as many times as she had since they'd parted. Then she had abruptly cut off her train of thought, telling herself she was being ridiculous. She had absolutely no reason to be thinking about James in that way…they were just friends.

It wasn't until they were close to their stop that Alice noticed her newest piece of jewelry.

"Oh my gosh Lil, did you get that for Christmas?" She breathed leaning forward to get a better look it.

Lily looked startled.

"What? Oh you mean the necklace…yes it was one of my presents." She said feigning nonchalance.

"Wow it's beautiful!" Marlene breathed. "Can I see it?"

Lily frowned.

"You mean you want me to take it off?"

Marlene nodded extending her hand for Lily to put the necklace into it.

"Uh…I don't really take it off." Lily scrambled for an explanation. "I mean it's sort of expensive, I think…and I am still getting used to wearing it."

Marlene looked at her oddly and then looked at Dorcas who shrugged in response. Alice looked at her shrewdly, causing Lily to wonder if she maybe knew more than Lily would like her to.

Lily tried to look as if everything were normal but she could tell by the way James had once again gone still behind her that he was waiting to see her reaction. She looked up to see that aside from a rather amused expression on his face Sirius was keeping quiet. She didn't know why but she assumed he knew that James had given her the necklace. There wasn't much the two of them didn't tell each other.

"Did your Dad get it for you?" Alice asked curiously still admiring the necklace.

"No."

Lily pretended not to notice her friends staring at her still waiting for an answer. Just as Dorcas began to ask another question Lily was saved by the train coming to a stop.

"Oh we're back already. Time sure flies huh?" She mumbled as she scrambled quickly.

She kept on rambling, feeling hot and flustered, right up until they stepped off the train, sighing in relief when no one brought up the necklace again. She wondered for a moment if maybe she should take it off to keep everyone from being so curious but oddly that felt wrong.

She couldn't help but wonder why James hadn't jumped in with an explanation, or even Sirius for that matter. She herself didn't really understand why, despite the fact that she wanted to wear the necklace, she couldn't bring herself to admit to everyone who it had come from.

****

A month back into term Lily and James seemed like they were on their way to being something more than friends. They could be seen doing any number of things together including taking walks, studying in the common room or reading side by side near the lake.

And while things seemed to be moving in the right direction for them they were also moving along for her friends. The girls had found out the first night back that Alice had been writing to Frank Longbottom all Christmas holliday. The two of them it seemed were hitting it off.

Remus and Dorcas seemed to be following the same route, or so it seemed as they were often seen in each others company each with a somewhat love-struck expression upon their face.

"So what are we going to do for Lily's seventeenth?" Alice asked the group at large as they sat in the common room one evening.

"Well it is on a Sunday, so maybe we could have it Saturday the twenty-ninth." Marlene put in as she moved her rook. She and Sirius had taken to playing chess against one another most evenings.

"You guys, please, let's not get crazy here. I mean it's just a birthday. Can't we just do something simple like hang out together by the lake and then have cupcakes."

"Oh please we both know you don't really even like cake. So why would we come up here and eat cupcakes…that's ridiculous." Alice informed her saucily. "I think we should go with my suggestion, since we didn't do it for Marlene's birthday."

Lily groaned.

"Alice honestly I just can't see myself letting some stranger decorate my body in a semi-private place."

The four Marauders looked at them with interest.

"What are you two on about?" Remus asked curiously.

"Alice wants us all to go get wizarding tattoos. But we aren't completely sold. Lily especially doesn't want to have to _reveal _anything to get it but she knows that if it is visible her mum and dad will probably murder her in her sleep." Dorcas supplied. "I'm inclined to agree with Lily as my dad isn't the sort to be amused by my getting a tattoo."

"I just don't fancy the idea of some stranger ogling me in order to get something that I'm not sure I want anyway." Lily supplied wrinkling her nose.

She pretended not to notice James' look of approval.

Alice sighed. "Fine I'll give you guys more time to think about them…we'll get them on Dorcas' birthday instead."

"Well that's all good and fine," Marlene chuckled, "but that doesn't answer the question of what we are going to do for Lily's seventeenth birthday."

Sirius suddenly looked up from their game, his grin impish.

"How about you leave that to us Marauders."

Lily opened her mouth to protest but was cut off by Alice and Dorcas' instant cries of agreement.

"Wait a minute you guys I…"

"This is going to be great." Alice chirped, then looked up to see Frank coming through the portrait hole. "I'm going to go invite Frank."

Lily groaned, "Wait Alice I haven't…." she sighed as her friend marched off without listening to her, "agreed to anything." She finished lamely.

"Come on Lily. It won't be that bad." Peter encouraged.

"Ya Lils." Marlene put in. "You never know you might actually have a really good time."

She sighed in defeat, already knowing that any further arguing was probably pointless.

James grinned as she slumped down into the cushions. If he had anything to do with it, she was going to have a really great birthday.

****

The night that Lily's friends threw their extravagant seventeenth birthday celebration in the common room for her was definitely more fun than she had thought it would be. The Marauders had gone all out decorating the common room in scarlet and gold and stringing all sorts of lights across the ceiling, and along the stair railings, making the atmosphere somewhat romantic. There was a butterbeer fountain in the middle of the snack table and a plethora of Honedukes and Hogwarts sweets littering the table.

Lily was thankful at least that most people had gone along with her pleas and kept the gift giving to a minimum. She had privately informed James in particular that, after his somewhat over the top Christmas gift, he was under no circumstances to buy her anything for her birthday. He had reluctantly agreed.

The party was in full swing, people were enjoying themselves immensely and James was happy to see Lily having fun while dancing with her friends.

"I guess we did an alright job eh Prongs?" Sirius remarked tipping his head at Lily.

"Yea she seems like she is having a good time."

James smiled in amusement as the song ended and Lily was dragged over to his and Sirius' corner by Alice.

Sirius grinned mischievously and grabbed ahold of Alice the second she was within reach.

"Come on Prewett. Tell us." He teased his arms wrapping around her middle and tickling her sides.

Alice struggled through her laughter attempting to break free.

"Tell you…wha..what?"

"You know what. Tell us how you feel about Longbottom."

"I'm not saying anything to you Sirius. You have the biggest… mmmm…mu…mouth of anyone in Hogwarts." She chuckled.

"I'm hurt, really I am, to think you would believe that I would tell him you like him. Because we all know you like him Alice. We aren't blind." Sirius informed still tickling her mercilously.

"So what if I do?" Alice managed through her giggles. "Wha…what's it to you?"

Sirius stopped instantly.

"To me? Nothing. But to Frank it's sure something."

Alice straightened and saw the guy in question headed straight for her. She turned her attention to Sirius whose look was daring her to man up and tell Frank how she felt.

"You know Black." Alice remarked grabbing his upper arm. "You might want to take up your own challenge someday huh?" Her gaze shifted meaningfully to Marlene, who stood over by a window looking over the party with a smile on her face, before she let go of him and went prancing toward the oncoming Frank.

"So Prewett." He said upon her reaching him, loudly enough for most of their half of common room to have heard it. "What's a guy got to do to get a date with you anyway?"

Lily watched happily as Alice smiled widely and shrugged.

"I don't know. What's a girl got to do to get a date with you?" She mimed

Frank grinned and dipped his head down to Alice's ear whispering something meant only for her. Then Alice lifted her head and smiling like mad said,

"Well you should have said something. I would have done it a long time ago."

And with that she stretched up on her toes and kissed him. Lily, James and Sirius clapped along with the rest of the common room as Frank wrapped his arms around Alice and carried her off to a more private corner.

"Ahh young love. Now if only Moony would get a move on with Meadows." Sirius put in watching as Remus danced with Dorcas.

James frowned and eyeing Lily worriedly said, "You know he has his reasons."

"He shouldn't let one minor little problem interfere with his love life." Sirius replied with a shrug.

"You know to him it's more than that." James answered back, once again looking worriedly at Lily.

"If you are trying to skirt around the fact that Remus is…" Lily looked around cautiously. "A werewolf because you are worried I'll find out I can assure you I've known for years. I figured it out when we were second years. I'm smart enough to figure out where he goes every month, considering the timing."

"Please tell me you haven't told anyone." Sirius said harshly, causing James to shoot him a warning look.

"Of course not, it's not my place to tell."

James exchanged an awkward look with Sirius and sighed before asking Lily. "How come you've never said anything about it to him?"

"Because it wasn't my place to say anything, besides it's up to Remus to decide if he wants to tell me or anyone else for that matter. I can't say I wouldn't be just as afraid of rejection if I were him. It's bad enough being muggleborn in this place. Half the time I feel I'm not wanted."

Sirius grin turned from anxious to amused as he looked from Lily to James.

"Oh trust me Lily-flower you are wanted all right. Probably more wanted than you can imagine."

Lily blushed as James elbowed his best friend in the stomach.

She then excused herself to go and see Marlene, when she found her she was leaning against a window looking at Sirius and James as they talked heatedly.

"You would think I would give up on him after all this time…" Marlene said quietly her eyes on Sirius. "I just wish he'd give me a shot you know."

"I know." Lily replied. "We all know you've been waiting for him to wise up for years. I mean you even went all through forth year not dating anyone in case he decided to ask you out."

"A fat lot of good that did me, at least the next year I dated around. Now I'm back to square one again. Single and pining for someone who won't give me the time of day."

Lily sighed and turned to look out the window wondering, not for the first time that year, if maybe she had made a similar mistake with James.

"Maybe he just needs to know that he is what you want." She supplied. "Maybe if you hint to him that he's what you are looking for then he'll start to get the message."

Marlene snorted in frustration, "Something tells me it won't get through that easily."

Alice came rushing over with Frank in tow, her face flushed with excitement.

"Come on Lily it's time for you to blow out the candles."

Lily allowed herself to be towed along with Frank over to a couch that had been moved against the wall, the coffee table in front of it was cleared of all empty cups and plates.

Everyone gathered around as Remus came over with a three tiered cake, with white frosting and complete with emerald green decorative icing in the shape of lilies.

Marlene bent over the back of the couch to whisper in Lily's ear.

"Sirius told me that since you had forbidden James to buy you anything he oversaw every step of the house elves making your cake."

Lily blushed slightly but smiled wide as the candles were lit and the crowd began singing 'Happy Birthday' to her.

She blew out the candles to a chorus of cheers and clapping. Her smile if possible grew even wider when she realized that the cake was in fact an ice-cream cake, complete with her three favorite flavors, one in each tier.

She chose the mint chocolate chip layer and set about eating a huge slice, telling herself more than once that she really enjoyed ice-cream and that her happiness about the cake had nothing to do with how much effort James had put into making it and everything to do with her enjoying her birthday celebration in general.

She grinned fabulously at James as she took a huge bite. All in all she had had a pretty great birthday.

****

It was nearing the middle of February when all James' hard work shattered into a million pieces.

"Come on mate don't you think it's about time you asked her out again?" Sirius prodded from his bed.

The four Marauders were each sitting on their own four poster their curtains drawn up and back as they threw a muggle baseball, stolen from some first year back when they were third years, back and forth between each of their beds.

"I can't. It has to be her decision this time." James replied sounding determined.

"Prongs mate, what if she never does that?"

"She will." Remus broke in. "I mean look at how far we've come from last year."  
"Ya she'll come around." Peter put in catching the baseball Remus threw him and launching it back.

"But what if James goes through seventeen years of life never getting laid, never fooling around, never even kissing another girl, at least since third or fourth year, and all because he's waiting on Lily Evans and she never decides to date him."

"Thanks Padfoot that's really reassuring." James muttered crossly. "Besides when I do sleep with someone I'd like it to actually mean something if that's alright with you?"

"Hey I'm not saying it can't mean something. All I'm saying is you are sixteen and virginal. Hell Wormtail might not even be a virgin anymore and Moony doesn't count cause his circumstances are different. You are gonna be seventeen soon and your holding out for this one girl when there are dozens upon dozens of girls who would love to be with a good-looking, intelligent, athletic and rich bloke such as yourself. Your wasting your blessings here Prongs."

James sighed. "Look I know you don't understand it. Hell I don't even understand it sometimes but I just can't bring myself to even try to be with anyone but her. I've thought about it you know I have. I even kissed a few girls third and fourth year trying things out. It just never fit okay. I only want Lily."

"Merlin the standards you set for yourself are higher than the tower we're in." Sirius muttered. "I mean have you seen Lily Evans. She's drop dead out of this world beautiful…kind of like your mum. And she's smart. And she's…"

"I think he's already figured all of this out Padfoot." Remus chuckled.

"Yes well…" Sirius cleared his throat. "All I'm saying is if James is looking for a way to put losing his virginity up on a pedestal he's definitely figured it out."

James groaned. "Can we please stop talking about the fact that I'm still a virgin? Please? Merlin it's embarrassing enough without having my best friends analyze it for me._ I_ know I'm a virgin and that's bad enough okay?"

His friends all chuckled.

"Come on James if we don't tease you you'll just get all arrogant again and then you'd lose Lily altogether." Sirius said.

"Do you really think I'm starting to make progress with her?" James asked worriedly.

"Yup. One of these days she might even let you kiss her." Sirius teased tossing the baseball back to James with a cheeky smile.

James blushed slightly, "Ya who knows." He answered feeling awkward about not telling his friends he had already done that albeit somewhat accidentally.

But there was something about the kiss he'd shared with Lily that had him keeping it to himself. It wasn't that it wasn't a great kiss, because it was. It was a flat out perfect kiss, and she hadn't slapped or cursed him at all afterward. The problem was he knew if he told them they would read more into it than there actually was. He was astute enough to know that Lily wasn't ready for that sort of thing. Things were going well between them, but he knew that at this point in time he was lucky enough to just have Lily's friendship. Anything more would probably scare her off him for awhile and then who knew where they would be in relation to one another. Ignoring their kiss for the time being was his best course of action. He would just have to settle for replaying it in his head every other moment of the day.

"Well mate. Tomorrow is another day perhaps it will be your big day." Sirius put in jovially.

James grinned, a guy could only hope.

****

The next day was the worst day of James' life.

He was on his way to Potions and he was early, having left his friends still eating breakfast in the Great Hall, since he needed to speak with Slughorn about his latest assignment, when he rounded the corner and heard a group of Slytherin's talking down the corridor.

"I mean honestly if she'll do Potter she'll do anyone. Are you trying to tell me you were all buddy buddy with the mudblood for all those years and you never got in her pants."

James scowled. He recognized Edmond Mulciber's voice and knew that he and his friends must be gathered in the hall waiting for the class to start.

"That's not what I said." Snape's voice bit back.

"Come on Severus, you're not giving us any details here." Mulciber's voice came again. "I mean how are we supposed to know if she's as good as she looks if you don't fill us in? Mudblood or no the girl just makes a bloke stiff. So tell us, what's her body like?"

"She's gorgeous." Snape answered sounding nonchalant. "Her body is likely just as enticing as her face."

"How's she in bed mate?" John Avery's voice rang out.

"You aren't honestly asking me how good Lily Evan's is in bed. I thought you of all people were against mixing with tainted blood?" Snape shot back.

"Just because I wouldn't keep the stupid slut doesn't mean I would pass up taking her for a tumble." Avery answered haughtily.

"I don't know why you care anyway. You are always saying lesser blood isn't worth the effort you'd have to extend to obtain it. Besides she's been associating with those morons who call themselves Marauders, so it definitely isn't worth the hassle to you." Snape sneered.

James had heard enough. Fury drove him as he shot around the corner and before any of the Slytherins could react launched himself at Snape tackling him to the ground, and taking Snape's two friends with them, the other boy's wand going flying.

He didn't know how many times his fists connected with Snape's body parts before he was pulled off of him and was punched in the jaw by Mulciber. He breathed through it and socked him in the nose in retaliation. Then using his wand he stunned the other two and turned to Snape who was barely managing to stagger upright. James fisted his hands in Snape's robes as he dragged him up the wall.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" He bellowed angrily. "How can you just talk about her like that? How can you let them say those things?"

Snape's chuckle was hollow sounding as he sputtered through what looked like a broken nose. "Don't speak to me about her."

James growled in frustration. "You think I don't know you care about her still? You think I don't see the way you watch her? The way you can't help but look at her every chance you get. You can act like you don't care in front of your friends all you want but I'm not fooled. You want her just as much as ever. You're just too fucking weak to act like a man and admit it."

Snape's eyes narrowed. "She's not yours you know. You think we're so different but at the end of the day you're just as pathetic as me because deep down we both know we aren't good enough. We never will be."

James took a deep breath and jerked on Snape's robes trying to keep his anger in check.

"You know what you're right. We aren't good enough for her, but at least I can sleep at night knowing I don't act like I'm too good for her because of something as stupid and meaningless as her blood."

"That also doesn't change the fact that you still haven't managed to get in her pants either does it Potter?" Snape taunted his eyes going cold.

"For Merlin's sake." James growled before punching Snape again in an almost tired manner.

Suddenly an angry voice James knew all too well rang out.

"Leave him alone!"

James turned suddenly dropping Snape to the floor. Lily stood only feet away with their friends looking on in shock from behind her. The look in her eyes was enough to make James' chest constrict.

"Lily, this isn't what it looks like I swear!" He began pleading.

Snape chuckled, the sound void of all pleasant emotion. "So you didn't come barreling around the corner hell-bent on attacking my friends and beating the shit out of me?"

"Is that true? You attacked them?" Lily demanded.

James sighed. "Well yes but…"

"So much for changing right? So much for all that talk about being a better person? And here I was thinking we were becoming friends and even having...Merlin I'm an idiot!" She shot back grabbing her hair in frustration. "I mean first _he_" she pointed at Snape "decides he'd rather do dark magic and hang out with pricks who torture people for fun than be my friend because I'm a mudblood…"

"Don't call yourself that." James shot in.

"…And then _you_" She pointed her finger at James now, "go back on your promise and turn right back into the jerk who attacks people at every turn just because he can! And I don't want to hear what you have to say!"

James shut his mouth in surrender.

"Or you!" Her eyes shot to Snape who followed suit.

"I'm…I'm…" Lily tried to take deep breaths but she felt oddly suffocated and strangely disoriented standing in the corridor looking at James standing over a bloody and bruised Severus, with Severus' friends laying about them still stunned. She turned away from it and shoved past Sirius and Remus. She wasn't going to hang around and look at either of them for another second.

James made to move after her but Sirius intercepted him.

"Prongs mate let her go cool off. She probably doesn't want to talk about it right now."

"But I have to explain." He said. "It isn't what it looks like."

Marlene walked over to him and put her hand on his arm.

"Sirius is right give her a little while to cool off okay? I mean you really can't blame her for being upset. This really does look like the old James just decided to come out and play…"

Marlene trailed off eyeing the scene in the corridor where Snape was moving to revive his friends.

"Come on mate we'll go to the kitchens or something…" Sirius suggested tugging James toward a corridor off to the side where a hidden passage led to the hallway where the portrait with the bowl of fruit was.

"Padfoot it really wasn't what she thought. I was only trying to defend her…the things they were saying…"

"I know Prongs. I know you wouldn't mess up like that." He replied reassuringly as James ran his hands through his messy hair in frustration.

Marlene, Alice and Dorcas exchanged looks as James and Sirius moved away, knowing how Lily was that it was going to take some time to get things back in order again.

****


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note:**

**Hey everyone! Here is chapter 8, I know it is rather short but I didn't really want to cram it full of angst or try to attatch it along with the next chapter so the result is this. Hopefully it satisfies everybody for a day or so. Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I really appreciate it :) I love hearing what you guys have to say and I honestly welcome any and all comments you might have on how this story is going. So pretty please Review!**

**Well here goes...**

Chapter 8

Distance and a Drunken Cove

Two days later James was more frustrated than he had ever been. Lily wasn't showing up to classes until the second before they started and she was the first one to leave when the lesson was through. He hadn't been able to catch her in the common room or at mealtimes as she always seemed to be somewhere else or just leaving. He tried talking to her friends but they just insisted that he needed to give her a little time. He knew they were probably right but giving Lily space was extremely difficult considering he hadn't even been able to tell her his side of the story. And to make matters worse he had Snape giving him irritatingly satisfied smirks at every turn due to his pleasure over James and Lily's apparent rift.

"How the bloody hell am I supposed to get her to understand anything if I can't get her to talk to me?" James moaned to Remus as they worked together in Potions.

"She's obviously not ready to talk James, but Lily is sensible she'll see reason soon and you'll be able to tell her everything and get it all sorted."

James sighed and looked over to where Snape sat staring at Lily as he stirred his potion.

"I really want to beat the shit out of him all over again when he looks at her like that," he growled thickly.

"You mean when he looks at her sort of like you do?" Remus chuckled.

"Not helping Moony."

"Sorry but you know it's true. He looks at her like he's in love with her. Though I don't know if he has as good of a handle on his emotions as you do. He's rather conflicted I think and unfortunately for him I think he lost his chance, if he really ever had one, with Lily after last year."

James nodded and decided to ignore the Slytherin boy and pay attention to his work. He supposed if Lily needed time he was going to have to give it to her and just settle in to wait, though not without venting to his friends at every opportunity.

After watching James mope about for two days Sirius decided it would be a good idea to get his mind off things so he developed a plan that involved reminiscing about their past exploits and a lot of Odgens Old Firewhiskey, as well as all too conveniently happening upon a certain redhead and her friends in the common room. Now he just had to hope was that Alice, Dorcas and Marlene stuck to their part of the plan.

****

Lily sighed in frustration as she tried to get through her Transfiguration essay. It was becoming overly difficult for her to concentrate on anything as, ever since the whole incident before Potions, she hadn't felt right. Her friends had tried to talk some sense into her about the whole thing.

"All I'm saying is maybe what you saw, or what we saw, isn't really what we all saw, maybe what we saw was something else you know?" Alice supplied the night after the incident as they all sat in the sixth year girls dormitory after class.

"What?" Lily frowned as she hung her head upside down off the edge of her bed.

"I think what Alice is trying to say is that there might have been more going on than we originally thought. I'll be the first to admit it looked just like old times with James amidst a bunch of tortured unsuspecting Slytherins but maybe something happened that we don't know about." Marlene put in from Alice's bed next Lily's.

Lily sighed in frustration. "It's just that it was so _familiar_ you know? It just brought back all those times that he was mean and horrible just because he could be."

"And that scared you." Alice stated as she elbowed Marlene's foot out of the way of her head.

Lily nodded at her. "Yeah, how'd you know?"

"It's an understandable reaction. I mean it's only been what five months or so since the start of term and the official presentation of a brand new James? I can understand why seeing what you did might make you feel somewhat unsure of him now."

"That's exactly what it did." Lily replied rolling over so that Alice and Marlene came into view right side up. "I mean up until now I've sort of been rebuilding my whole idea of just who James Potter really is and after what happened I can't help but wonder if I was just completely fooling myself or something."

"I don't think you were." Dorcas supplied from where she sat against Lily's headboard. "I mean James is a complicated mix of a lot of things but he's never really been a bad guy. Yeah he did a lot of immature and stupid stuff, that sometimes embarrassed or hurt others, but he was young and crazy and in love with a girl and he felt he would do whatever it took to get her to notice him even if that attention was the opposite kind from what he truly wanted. And it didn't help that he had Black egging him on throughout the whole process."

"I just wish I could sort out how I feel you know? Everything was going so great up until this. Now I don't know what to think about anything." Lily sighed flopping onto her back once more.

"Maybe that's your problem. You're over-thinking it." Marlene nodded. "Maybe if you just take a day or two and try not to dwell on it, it will all eventually work itself out properly."

So that's what Lily had done. She had spent the past two days doing her best not to think about James while at the same time avoiding him at every turn. Yet, somehow it wasn't helping at all. She really needed to talk to him at some point or she was never going to get her feelings untangled.

"Why are we studying in the common room this late at night again?" Lily questioned as she yawned tiredly.

Alice stared wide eyed at Dorcas who looked at Marlene who sighed and said hurriedly,

"Because we haven't got any proper studying in for quite some time and we all need to get our act together because before we know it we will be taking our NEWTs and if we don't start developing good study habits now we'll never do as well as we'd like."

Lily looked at her friend tiredly and then at Alice and Dorcas who were nodding along in enthusiastic agreement and she sighed, "Alright if you say so."

"Quite right I do." Marlene muttered and then turned her face back to the book she had been pretending to read for the past hour.

She, Alice and Dorcas had done what Sirius asked and had gotten Lily to agree to come down and study in the darkest most deserted corner of the common room and now they were waiting on Sirius to put his part of the plan into motion. Marlene looked at her watch and sighed it was nearing midnight and for all intents and purposes they were supposed to be in bed. If Sirius didn't get a move on they wouldn't be able to keep Lily in place for much longer.

Ten minutes later she let out a quiet sigh of relief as the portrait hole swung open and four figures stumbled in loudly.

Lily sat up to see who was causing all the ruckus and her eyes widened in astonishment. Sirius and Remus were supporting an obviously drunk James who was laughing madly at something one of them had said.

"You know…thass why I like you Moony...yer sooo funneeeeee," he slurred slightly.

"I like you too James." Remus replied with a smile as he and Sirius guided James down onto the nearest sofa.

"You guys are the best," James went on. "I mean without you lot I would probably still be in Hogsmeade tellin' Rosmerta all about how I fucked up royally with Lily again."

"Prongs mate you didn't screw up that bad. She's gonna forgive you, just give her some time." Sirius comforted.

Marlene noted that to his credit he didn't look their way even once as he spoke to his friend. He masterfully pretended that he had absolutely no clue he and his friends weren't alone in the common room.

James had sat up at Sirius' words and looked at his best friend as if he had horns growing out of his head.

"No she isn't.._hiccup…_She saw me in the hall with a bunch of stupid slytherrrinnns and she thought I'd done what I used to do. She is never…like never gonna forgive me for that cause that's exactly what I told her I wasn't going to do anymore."

Sirius smirked slightly at the somewhat poor condition his friend was in but pressed on just the same.

"Maybe you should tell her what happened mate."

Remus nodded along smiling as well. "Ya Prongs. Just tell her what happened."

James groaned.

"Don't you think I would if.. _hic .._I could. She is avoiding me. She doesn't want to see me."

"But what happened again anyway?" Remus prompted. "I mean I know you told Sirius the whole thing but Pete and I didn't get the whole story."

James sighed and flopped back into the cushions dramatically.

"I was goin' to…_hic…_ Potions. Member I told you I had to ask old Sluggy about…_hic…_ that essay we were supposed to write. Well before I got there I heard Snivellus…" here James paused thoughtfully, "I mean Snape, talking with his friends outside the classroom. They were taking about Lily. My Lily you know, not that fourth year from Hufflepuff, the one with the freckles and the bushy blonde hair... But that asshole Mulciber was asking Snape about whether or not he'd ever made it with her. He was saying that Snape couldn't expect them to believe that he had been all buddy…_hic…_buddy with Lily for so long without him having gotten something out of it. They thought he slept with her you know?"

Here James sighed in frustration grabbing his hair and making it stick up even more.

"Then what?" Remus pressed as Sirius looked at him encouragingly.

"Well then they went on about it. Mulciber wanted Snape to give them details about.._hic.._ what Lily's body was like. I mean what a fucking prick you know. The way they were talking about her…like she wasn't a person or …I don't know. It was just completely …hic…unacceptable. Cause then and this is probably the worst part of it, Avery…hic…asked how she was in bed and that coward Snape said something about how he didn't know why Avery was asking because Avery was supposedly so against mixing with _tainted _blood. He called her blood _tainted _and he…he was supposed to be her friend. He was supposed to be her.._hiccup_…friend and he let those bastards talk about her like she was trash or something. My Lily. The most amazing girl I've ever laid eyes on in my entire life and they were talking about her as if she were just some common slag or Knockturn Alley whore. I just lost it you know. I saw red and couldn't do a fucking thing but what I did."

Sirius sighed for effect here and put his hand on James' shoulder.

"Mate I'm sure once she hears all this she'll understand a little better." He said with finality, winking discreetly at Remus and Peter for a job well done.

James was quiet for a minute before he went on in a gravelly voice putting his palms to his eye sockets and resting his elbows on his knees.

"You want to know what kills me about it?"

Sirius looked slightly alarmed that James was continuing to talk and said in honest curiosity.

"What?"

"They said things about how if she would sleep with me she would sleep with anyone. They think she's been sleeping with me just like half the other idiots in this place."

James and Remus looked at each at a lost for words not understanding what James was on about. It was Peter who cut in helpfully.

"Is that such a bad thing? I mean it's not like you are sleeping with her, you aren't sleeping with anyone… err, right now… so what does it matter?"

James looked up from his hands sadly, starting to become more alert as they talked.

"It matters because what if…what if the reason they are saying those things about her and being such fucking dicks is because of me? What if because they think she's sleeping with me they think they can punish me or get at me through her? Or even worse…what if they think that because I'm a pureblood and she's not that I won't stay with her, hypothetically _hic_ speaking, and then from there they assume they can step in." James paused and went on sounding tired. "Merlin I hate that she's muggleborn sometimes. Not because I care what any of those idiots say about her… but because I'm fucking terrified they'll try and hurt her because of it. I'm so scared that with the way things are going these days, with Voldemort gathering followers, that she'll be targeted. That they'll try and make good on all their awful threats. Afterall I hear enough about the attacks from my dad. They could easily pick her."

Sirius frowned in sympathy.

"Prongs mate, you know we'd never let that happen. Even if you don't get to work things out with her, you would never let them hurt her like that."

James looked over at his friend his eyes bloodshot and worried.

"What if I never get a chance to love her?" He asked so quietly Lily almost didn't catch it.

Sirius looked at Remus and then at Peter signaling to them that it was time to take their friend upstairs before he said more things he wouldn't want Lily to hear.

As they lifted him up off the couch, Remus and himself both taking an arm again, Sirius replied loudly enough for Lily to hear.

"I promise James one of these days she's going to realize that you can give her everything she ever wanted. She'll let you love her and she'll love you back."

****


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey Guys, thanks to everyone who reviewed. I really appreciate all the great comments so please keep it up! :)**

**This is unfortunately another short chapter but I'll do my best to make the next one a bit longer (I've kind of had a busy week, though that's a poor excuse)**

**Well Here Goes Chapter 9**

**FORGIVENESS**

Lily woke the next morning and the first thing that came into her mind was the scene from the common room the night before. She couldn't believe the things they had overheard. Her friends, thank Merlin, hadn't said anything once the Marauders had disappeared they had merely packed up their things and followed Lily up to their dormitory.

It had taken her a long time to fall asleep but she had eventually done so amidst a sea of thoughts that included emotions such as confusion, worry, doubt, fear and happiness. Now this morning she was just as confused but more resolved than she had been previously. One thing was for sure.

She needed to find James.

*****

James sat in the Great Hall trying to block out the noise of the students around him as his head was pounding.

"Come on Moony are you almost done yet?"

Remus chuckled at his friend as he put the finishing touches on his special hangover remedy. It had been tested and proven to work without fail by the Marauders more times than they could count.

"Here ya go." He said finally handing over the red fizzing concoction to his friend.

James took a few large gulps before sighing happily.

"Ahhhh Moony my friend, have I told you lately that you're my favorite person in the world?"

"No I would have to say that you haven't." Remus chuckled.

"Then I'm a bloody idiot mate, cause you're my favorite person in the world."

His friends laughed as he eagerly worked his way through the rest of the Hangover potion and they began to talk about the upcoming quidditch match against Slytherin.

James turned at the light tap on his shoulder. He shot up to his feet quickly at the sight of the petite red head in front of him.

"Lily," he said in surprise.

Merlin she was beautiful. Her red hair was piled messily atop her head and James had the urge to reach out and play with a tendril that had come half loose.

She let go of the bottom lip she was biting to say.

"I was wondering if we could talk."

James nodded feeling like his tongue was stuck to the roof of his mouth, thankful at least that Remus' potion worked so well, because he wasn't having to try and speak to her through a pounding headache.

"Would now be okay?" She went on when he didn't say anything.

"Of course." He answered still amazed that she was there in front of him and hadn't decided to avoid him for the fourth day in a row.

When he merely stared at her for awhile longer Lily couldn't help but chuckle softly.

"Well how about you walk me to the lake then?"

James nodded eagerly, extremely glad that she had laughed at him and was even now still smiling, as that boded well for him. He grabbed up his things quickly, unaware of the triumphant looks his friends were exchanging between themselves and with Lily's friends who had just arrived.

He fell into step with her and together they left the Great Hall and headed for the castle doors.

Once outside, Lily broke the silence between them.

"So first of all I wanted to say I'm sorry for how I've handled the situation between us since the incident the other day. I…"

She paused seeming to search for the right words.

"I really should have given you the opportunity to explain the situation. Not necessarily right when it happened but at least soon afterward."

James sighed feeling relieved at her words.

"I don't blame you for reacting the way you did Lily. I know how it looked and with my track record it's not like it's difficult to jump to the wrong conclusion in that sort of instance. Honestly I probably deserved it for the way I behaved before. You really shouldn't feel sorry for it." He supplied shoving his hands into his pockets as they strolled along down the path leading to the lake.

"Your past exploits aside," Lily responded. "I should have let you explain. We've grown closer over these past few months and it wasn't right of me not to at least give you a chance to explain."

She watched as James kicked a stone off the path and then went on.

"I would have given any of my other friends the benefit of the doubt and, while I know your past is sort of what led me to jump to conclusions, I still should have heard your explanation."

James opened his mouth to answer her but Lily stopped him.

"Hang on…just let me get this out okay?"

He fell silent at her words and waited patiently as she gathered her thoughts.

They reached the lake and made their way out onto one of the docks. Surprisingly Lily removed her shoes and sat down to let her legs dangle over the water, her toes brushing the still surface. James grinned at her fearlessness of the cold and followed suit.

"I want to tell you why I've been avoiding you." She said softly her eyes focused on the surface of the lake. "It wasn't so much what you did, or what I thought you did I guess, that made me stay away for so long. It was how I felt afterward. When I saw you, with Sev all beat up and well you know...I felt sort of betrayed."

James tensed at her words feeling horrible.

"But then that got me thinking. The only reason I would feel betrayed was if I had trusted you beforehand right? …and well I guess I realized that I_ had_ trusted you before that whole thing. That scared me. I knew we were getting closer, becoming friends but I hadn't realized how much I had begun to have faith in you. It was a lot to think about. The idea that I trusted you, that at any time you could betray that trust and leave me looking like a fool, it was hard to swallow. I worried that I would end up hurt if for some reason the old James, or the guy I thought you were, decided to show up again.

"But here's the thing…I don't think that will happen and here's why. Over the past few months I've come to know you as a different person than I thought you were. I mean you have changed some of your ways but essentially you haven't changed the person that you are and I've been given the chance to realize that I never knew just who you were at all. I'm getting to know the James that Sirius, Remus and Peter have known for so long. The one who waits for me to sit down before he does and who holds doors open for me and my friends. The guy who reads as much as I do, who has a wicked sense of humor at times, who likes animals other than Filch's cat and who got me the most beautiful gift I've ever been given in my life. I'm still learning so much about who you really are and yet everyday you do something to make me thing more highly of you and…

"I'm beginning to think I was an idiot for not giving you the chance to be my friend before." She finished flushing prettily.

James had begun to feel warm at her words and he knew without a doubt that he was probably blushing just as much as she was. He would never had guessed that hearing Lily talk about him in a good way would make him feel so vulnerable and happy and embarrassed and thrilled all at the same time. He honestly didn't know how to react to what she had said.

"I don't really know what to say." He admitted swishing his feet in the ice cold lake water.

"I'm sorry I didn't give you the chance to explain James." Lily repeated. "I should know better by now."

He grinned.

"So it this my opportunity to explain then?"

He looked away from his toes and over to see the guilty look on her face.

"To be honest James I already heard the whole story." She confessed.

"From who? Did Padfoot…" he fell silent as she shook her head.

"From you actually. You see Alice, Marli, Dorcas and I were studying in the common room last night when you and your friends wandered in."

James groaned.

"Oh Merlin. Please tell me you're joking. I got completely obliterated last night due to a lot of whiskey courtesy of Padfoot."

Lily smiled at him.

"I had sort of noticed."

James chuckled at her amusement.

"I can remember telling them all about what had happened but only vaguely. I don't remember you being there at all."

"That's because no one knew we were. We were in the corner and I don't think your friends noticed we were there when you all came in. You were telling Remus about he whole thing and I…well needless to say I overheard."

"Did I…repeat what they said about you?"

She looked away from him and at her toes brushing the icy water.

"Yes."

"I'm sorry about that." He sighed.

Lily looked up at him curiously.

"You're sorry I found out what led you to attack them?"

"Well yes if it means you know the horrible things they were saying. I wouldn't have wanted you to hear about that. The things they said were…beyond reproach."

She grinned at him saying, "You're a strange guy James Potter."

"So they tell me." He chuckled.

Lily bit her lip again, causing James to both wonder what she was thinking and want to lean over and kiss her.

"So now that you know what happened and now that I know you know what happened, are things better between us?"

She nodded her lip still between her teeth. He let silence fall and waited for her to say whatever it was that was on her mind.

He grinned as he looked at the difference between their feet. He decided he had never seen more perfect feet than Lily Evans'. They were small and slender with the nails painted a rosy pink and they made his own feet look exceptionally large. Their paleness against the dark water made them look fairy-like.

"Do you want to maybe spend the next Hogsmeade trip with me again?" Lily said finally. "As friends that is."

James knew by the feeling in his cheeks that he was grinning hugely.

"I'd love that."

He waited a moment before saying seriously,

"I think my toes are going to fall off."

****


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note:**

**Hey Everyone, hope all is well :) This chapter is somewhat the result of this story having a mind of it's own as I never intended for it to end up the way it did...though it still goes along splendidly with my outline! To **Igneus Pride **this chapter and the next one should satisfy my including Snape more. I had already planned it that he would play a larger role in this chapter and even more so in the next one, so lucky you huh? **

**I've been posting the summary, chapter title and approximate posting date for the upcoming chapters on my profile lately so if anyone has an interest in reading a general outline of what the next chapter will entail, feel free to check it out!**

**As usual Pleas Please Please Review! and feel free to leave me messages as well :) **

**Hope you all enjoy and here goes**

**Chapter 10**

**A Quarrel and Quidditch Robes**

Things rapidly returned to normal between Lily and James. Sirius, unable to hold in his pride at having concocted the perfect plan to reconcile the two friends, had admitted to them both that he had staged the whole drunken confession scene for Lily's benefit and to everyone's surprise she had just laughed jovially and elbowed Sirius in the ribs.

The match between Gryffindor and Slytherin was set for Saturday, March nineteenth and James was in quidditch overdrive, running Sirius and the rest of his team ragged. It got so bad that Alice ended up shouting at James over breakfast for stealing all Frank's time. Lily had mediated and James had reluctantly agreed to ease up on the team… a little.

The Saturday of the game dawned bright and sunny and Lily sighed at having to put on the shirt Marlene had made her.

She made her way with Dorcas and Marlene down to breakfast and found James had saved her a seat next to him. She took it willingly and smiled at him as he listened to his team breakdown how the Slytherins played for what had to be the hundredth time. He seemed like he was more anxious and antsy than usual so she decided to try and ease his nerves a little.

"Good luck today." She told him piling her plate with pancakes.

"No waffles with strawberries on top?" He smirked seeing her food selection.

"Nah, it seems like a pancakes kind of day." She responded mock seriously.

"And what sort of day is a pancakes day?"

"Better than a waffles, but not as good as a French toast sort of day." She replied cheekily.

James just chuckled and passed her the bacon, which she took thankfully.

"So what sort of day is a French toast day then?" He asked curiously.

Lily smiled her eyes going dreamy, "French toast days are the absolute best. They are the kind of days that only come around every once in awhile."

"How do you know if it's a French toast day? I mean the day has only just started when you eat breakfast."

Lily shrugged.

"It's just a feeling I get. Just like I know today is a pancakes day."

James opened his mouth to ask her another question but he was distracted by Gideon asking him if he was ready to go. Lily watched his eyes widen as he realized that it was already time for him to make his way out to the pitch.

"Very smooth Evans." He said smiling brightly and standing to follow his team out of the great hall.

Lily smiled to herself as she tucked into her big stack of pancakes.

*****

"Come on, I had that third year Kresley Anderson save us seats." Alice chirped leading Lily and her friends toward a large group of scarlet and gold in one of the boxes.

Lily followed along chatting happily when she heard a voice call out.

"Lily!"

She turned to find herself looking at Jason Potter who stood two rows up with his wife. Lily waved and headed toward them, somewhat nervously.

"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Potter. It's nice to see you both again."

"You as well dear," Charlotte answered with a smile. "We decided to come and surprise James and Sirius today. I'm sure they'll be just thrilled to see us."

Lily smiled at her sarcastic tone.

"Actually I'm sure they'll be really pleased you both could come watch them play."

"We weren't sure if we would make it," Jason put in lightly, "So we didn't want to tell them we'd be here and then not be able to come."

"I underst…ow!" Lily turned when she felt an elbow lodge itself in her back.

She turned to see Alice and Marlene looking at her guiltily. They had apparently tried to get as close as possible to Lily while she spoke with James' dad.

"For Merlin's sake!" She scolded quietly. "Can you please get ahold of yourselves?"

"Sweet Slytherin he's beautiful." Alice whispered in fascination.

"I told you," Marlene said trying to see around her two friends. "Hello Mr. Potter it's lovely to see you again!"

Lily heard James' mother chuckle lightly as Jason replied, "It's nice to see you again as well Marlene. It's been awhile. I believe the last time I saw you you were around ten."

"Well I'm all grown up now." Marlene practically purred while grinning cheekily at him.

Lily groaned and shoved at her friends.

"Go…seriously, just go sit down…" She hissed pushing at them.

They went reluctantly, laughing at their own audacity and shooting James' dad appreciative looks over their shoulders.

Lily turned back around.

"Well I um…I suppose I should go take my seat as well. The match will probably start soon."

"Of course dear. It was lovely seeing you. Perhaps we'll be able to talk some more after the match?"

Lily nodded not really sure of how she felt about spending time with James' parents.

"Sure. I'll see you both once Gryffindor wins." She said smirking and heading off to take her seat in the front row of the box with her friends.

She scowled at Marlene and Alice.

"What?" Marlene chuckled innocently. "Oh, like you could resist if he weren't James' dad. The man positively oozes sexiness."

Lily rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on Lils just admit it. The man is positively scrumptious." Alice joined in.

"Ya and that's coming from the woman who is without a doubt in love with Frank Longbottom." Marlene teased.

Lily grinned at Alice's telling blush.

"Speaking of which Ms. Prewett, have you told Mr. Longbottom about this new development?" Lily prodded as she removed her sweater, the weather being warmer than she had anticipated.

"You mean have I said the three magic words guaranteed to make a guy run as fast as he can in the opposite direction? Absolutely not, I happen to like Frank and I'd prefer to keep him around a bit longer."

"Alice please, you know he loves you too. You guys can barely keep your hands off of each other and it hasn't even been two months yet. The boy is totally smitten with you. I'd say you got your wish." Marlene put in.

"What are you on about?" Alice asked her frowning in confusion.

"Just that you were all in a tizzy over how absolutely devoted to Lily that James was at the beginning of the year, well I'd say you got what you wanted because Frank Longbottom is without a doubt hopelessly in love with you."

Alice smiled shyly.

"Do you really think so?"

Her friends nodded and then shared a laugh over the dreamy look that appeared on Alice's face as the commentary for the game began.

Forty minutes later an all out war was going on in the air.

"FOUL!" Lily shouted angrily as Antonin Dolohov slammed into James without even the pretense of going for the quaffle.

"Look on the bright side Lily they've given James fifty points in fouls alone so far this game." Marlene said her voice filled with irritation at the dirty game the Slytherin's were putting on.

"Come on Frank!" Alice shouted. "Show those bloody cheaters what's up!"

Frank responded, whether he heard Alice or not, by making a spectacular save.

The game continued to be a rough one and Lily knew that her friends were probably going to be pretty bruised up by the time they walked off the quidditch pitch.

"Look!" Marlene finally shouted. "There goes Gideon, he's seen the snitch!"

Lily watched as Gideon dove down suddenly toward the pitch and a moment later pulled up looking triumphant with a sparking gold ball in his hand.

The crowd cheered wildly and began to make their way out of the stadium.

Lily got separated from her friends in the crush and found herself suddenly grabbed by one of the last people she wanted to see.

****

James turned at the tap on his shoulder.

"Great game kiddo." James' dad told him grinning like mad.

"Yes James you were great up there!" His mom put in, not to be outdone by her husband.

James hugged them happily.

"What are you guys doing here? I didn't know you were coming!"

"We wanted to surprise you. Especially since we weren't positive we'd make it." Charlotte answered.

"Well I'm glad you did. It was a good match. We only won by a hundred and seventy points, if Gideon hadn't got the snitch when he did the match could have gone either way," James replied.

He continued to talk to his parents animatedly about the game and about school until he was interrupted by Marlene tugging on his arm.

"You haven't seen Lily have you?" She asked curiously.

James shook his head.

"She's not with you guys?"

Marlene shook her head.

"We got separated in the crush. Everyone was so excited to get down onto the pitch that we lost her somewhere. I thought she'd catch up to us when we found Dorcas but no such luck. I just thought you might have seen her."

James frowned.

"Do you want me to help you look for her?"

"That's okay. Just let her know I was looking for her if you see her would you?"

He agreed still frowning as Marlene walked off.

"Lost your girlfriend already have you?" Jason teased.

James flushed, "You know she's not my girlfriend."

"I don't know about that. She seemed to like you quite a bit that day in Diagon Alley. And you certainly impressed her with your Christmas present."

"Neither of those things makes her my girlfriend." James insisted.

"Well come on, before this debate gets out of hand, lets head up to the castle, we have time to eat with you and visit some more before we go." Charlotte smiled and looped her arms into those of her son and husband steering them toward the castle.

They were near the doors to the castle when James heard the distinct voice of Lily Evans. He'd recognize that tone of hers anywhere, she definitely wasn't happy.

He moved toward it, unknowingly steering his parents that way as well.

Lily was standing against the castle wall as Severus Snape towered over. They were in one of the small courtyard's that lay around the castle.

"…can't believe you'd make such a fool of yourself over that prat!" Snape hissed.

"I'm not making a fool of myself over anyone. And it's none of your business Sev. I've told you before what I do isn't your concern anymore." She bit back scathingly.

"Lily please…you know that was an accident. I didn't mean to…"  
"To what?" She retorted hotly when he hesitated. "To call me a Mudblood? To treat me like I was beneath you when your friends were around and then turn around and want to be best friends again when they were gone?"

"I didn't mean to hurt you. You know that." Snape insisted, reaching out and putting his hands on Lily's upper arms.

"Stop it Sev." She insisted shrugging away from him. "I already told you, I can't do this. I can't be your secret friend. We are either friends, or we aren't. There's no in between. If we are friends there's no pretending not to know each other in front of Black and Avery and Mulciber and the rest of that lot. And there's no more Death Eater garbage from you."

Snape stiffened at her words.

"You don't know what you are talking about Lily. He's going to gain more and more power either way and right now you are choosing the wrong side."

"What choice do I have Sev?" She fumed. "He wants to do away with people like me. You know, us Mudbloods. I refuse to bow down or go along with someone who thinks I'm less of a person or less of a witch due to the nature of my birth."

"Lily I…it's not like I have much choice in the matter…"

"Bullshit. There's always a choice and right now, just like before, you are choosing to go along with someone who might one day like nothing more than to see me dead. And the truly horrible thing is…that even though you aren't okay with that, you're going to do it anyway, aren't you?"

Silence met her words and Lily pressed the heels of her palms to her eyes and James realized she was crying.

"You know Sev, James may not have always been the nicest guy, and he may have done things that I didn't approve of or even tolerate…but he wouldn't sit here and look at me like you are right now, and then turn around and join up with the sort of people who'd like to have me killed."

"No instead he looks at you like he owns you or something!" Snape spat at her his eyes going cold at the mention of James. "Like he's two steps away from shagging you and turning you into the stupid slag everyone already thinks you are!"

James heard a resounding crack and he realized that Lily had slapped Snape. He decided he'd had enough.

Snape's hand rubbed his cheek as he mumbled, "I'm sorry I didn't…"

"Lily." James interrupted breaking away from his parents and moving closer to her.

She looked up noticing him for the first time.

"James," She said in surprise, "I…"

"We were just looking for you. Marlene was worried when she didn't see you on the pitch." He put in trying to sound as calm as possible for her sake.

"Oh…yea. We got separated. I was just…" she looked up at Snape sadly and still somewhat angrilly. "…just saying goodbye to Sev."

James waited while Lily stared at Snape, the tears rolling down her cheeks. He forced himself to stay put while she waited for her former best friend to say or do something. She looked at Snape hopefully, while James fought a war with himself not to move forward and take her away from him.

"So that's it then?" Lily said quietly.

When Snape still remained quiet Lily sniffed sadly and moved to walk toward James. That was when Snape reached out and pulled her to him, his arms looped about her holding her flush against him.

"Lily please just…let's talk about this. I can't..."

James balled his hands into fists and watched as Lily stiffened.

"Stop it Sev. Just stop. I think we've said all we can say."

"Lily I just…I can't. I can't just let it all go."

She took a shaky breath and, planting her hands on his chest, pulled herself free of his hold.

"I think you know I can't just keep on like this either. I'm…I'm going now…"

"With _him_?" Snape asked through gritted teeth his tone flat.

Lily wiped her face once more.

"Yes. With him."

She stared at him decidedly for a second more before walking away to stand next to James.

He reached out and took her hand. He waited as she took a few shaky breaths then fell into step with her and headed back the way he had come. As they moved away James knew without a doubt that Snape was watching them intently as they walked away hand in hand.

They made it to where his parents stood waiting and James smiled through his worry over how Lily was feeling.

"Well I found her."

Lily looked up at them flushing crimson.

"I suppose you caught most of that too then?" She asked softly.

"Most of what?" Jason put in feigning innocence. "I was just looking for a quiet place to snog Charlotte, dreadful inconvenient of you two to show up right now."

Lily couldn't help but burst out laughing and James grinned at his dad in thanks.

"Come on." James said tugging on Lily's wrist as she wiped what was left of her tears from her eyes. "We'd better get inside before my dad can prove he wasn't joking."

****

As Lily walked with James and his parents into the castle she was more than slightly aware that she probably looked like a complete mess. She was ridiculously grateful to James' dad for making her feel less embarrassed and more at ease and for keeping up the conversation about quidditch with his wife and son until they were seated for dinner in the Great Hall. Yet even he couldn't keep her from feeling uncommonly sad at the thought of her argument with Sev.

"So I'm a little afraid to ask but what's with the T-shirt?" Charlotte questioned once they were seated and eating.

Lily looked away from where she had been having a silent conversation with Marlene about not coming over to gawk at Jason Potter and looked up at James mother.

"Pardon?"

"The t-shirt…It's um…" James' mom grinned impishly.

Lily looked down and gasped in shock.

"Oh Merlin. I'm…It's not mine." She blurted out folding her arms over her chest as if that would make it disappear. "It's not true that is I... oh for the love of Helga Hufflepuff… what I mean to say is that I am forced to wear this shirt by Marlene who made them for herself, Alice and me by Sirius who seems to think they are good luck. I had nothing to do with the making of them or with the decision that they should actually be worn."

James' dad chuckled.

"So why does yours have James' name and number?" He teased.

"Dad please…" James groaned. "Can you for like one second act like you care about my emotional well being and not ask questions that will lead to my being horribly embarrassed?"

Lily grinned, the action feeling strange against her cheeks which had grown tight from her tears, put at ease now that James was as red as she had been.

"It's alright James. Actually Mr. Potter that was also Marlene's idea, she'd been telling me for years that I should give James the opportunity to be my friend, so I suppose this is her way of making me own up to the fact that I'm actually getting along with James these days." Lily explained.

Jason opened his mouth to ask another question just as two figures planted themselves on Lily's right.

"There you are Lils." Marlene exclaimed her voice sugary sweet. "We thought we'd lost you."

"Ya I was all stoked after the match and us not being able to find you kind of put a damper on my high spirits." Dorcas put in her eyes darting to James' Dad appreciatively.

"Where's Alice?" Lily asked to distract them, both from where she had been and from eyeing James' dad as if he were Honeydukes chocolate.

"Oh she's with Frank. Probably celebrating the Gryffindor victory in some broom cupboard or another." Marlene answered.

Suddenly an excited shout was heard from twenty feet away.

"Charlotte!"

Lily turned to see Sirius running to the table and pulling James' mom up to hug her enthusiastically.

"Did you see? We won! And I was awesome!"

"I certainly did. You played very well, although I was a tad disappointed you disappeared after it was over. We would have liked to have been able to congratulate you out on the pitch with James."

Sirius smirked impishly.

"I had some important Marauder business to take care of." He said grinning and dropping into the seat next to her his arm going about Charlotte's shoulders.

Jason chuckled and rolled his eyes, "Hello son. Nice to see you too."

Sirius feigned innocence.

"Jason, old boy, I didn't see you there. The vision that is your lovely wife had me distracted."

Jason chuckled but lifted Sirius' arm from his wife's shoulders, replacing it with his own before grinning at the now frowning teenager triumphantly.

Lily laughed along with everyone else but she feared it wasn't as convincing as she might have hoped.

"So what's up anyway?" Marlene asked her softly as the others drifted into different conversations. "You're all splotchy like you've been crying or something."

Lily shrugged not wanting to rehash what had happened between her and Severus. Things had gotten out of hand between them and she now knew without a doubt that unless he changed his ways they were never going to be in the place that they once were ever again.

"Nothing. I'm fine." She supplied lamely.

"Did James do something?"

"Of course not." Lily protested.

"Well I'm just making sure, you never know…"

Lily was about to defend James when she looked up and saw Severus following in the wake of his fellow Death Eater wannabes, and suddenly she felt like she'd been punched in the stomach.

It was one thing to stand in front of him and argue about the idea of his betrayal of her friendship but to actually see him, only minutes after their confrontation, pretending as if everything were fine and continuing on the path that had set him and Lily at odds in the first place made her feel like her chest was closing up.

"Merlin Lils! What's wrong?" Marlene questioned worriedly as the tears began to pour down Lily's cheeks. "Are you alright?"

She couldn't speak. Her throat felt tight and there was nothing she could do but helplessly bat away the tears as they continued to fall.

"Lils…seriously you're worrying me." Marlene insisted trying to get Lily to react in some way.

But there was nothing she could do. The tears continued to leak out and her throat continued to feel awful and she was afraid that if she opened her mouth to try and reply all that would come out was a pathetic sobbing sound.

Suddenly strong arms wrapped themselves around her pulling her into a broad warm chest. She reached out grabbing him tightly as she began to shake, weeping silently.

"Come on." She heard him say moving to stand.

She didn't want to move and refused to pull her face from his chest forcing him to lift her as he stood.

"I…" He cleared his throat, his voice coming out oddly. "Can I carry you then?"

She didn't answer through her tears and he must have taken her silence as agreement because suddenly she was being carried swiftly from the hall.

****

James felt angry and worried as he carried a still silently crying Lily to the door to the kitchens. He held her with one arm as he reached up to tickle the pear in the bowl of fruit. As the handle appeared he turned it swiftly and made his way inside.

The house-elves rushed up almost instantly, greeting James and asking if they could be any help.

"This is my friend Lily." He explained moving toward a table and sitting down. "She isn't feeling so well and I was wondering if there is any ice-cream on hand."

"Of course. We has lot's." One tall and lanky looking elf replied as a few rushed off to grab some for them. "Does you want a certain flavor?"

"We'll take whatever you have available."

The elves who had disappeared returned then with two bowls of chocolate ice-cream.

James thanked them and after assuring them he would let them know if he needed anything else they disappeared.

He realized he was rubbing circles on Lily's back and he forced himself to stop.

"Are you alright?"

She shook her head, her nose going back and forth across the front of his quidditch robes.

"What's wrong then? Is this about the argument with _him_?" He bit out feeling furious at Snape.

He heard her sniffle as she shook her head again.

"Then what is it? I can't make it better if I don't know what's wrong." He supplied.

He felt, more than heard her laugh softly before she pulled her face from his chest. He felt oddly pleased when she didn't remove her arms from about his waist, though he was sad to see her cheeks were rather splotchy and her eyes were red-rimmed and watery. She still looked utterly beautiful to him.

"It wasn't so much our quarrel, though that had something to do with it, it was more about seeing him afterward acting as if everything were fine. Waltzing about with those awful friends of his."

"He's a right bastard for making you cry like this." James growled, feeling fiercely protective of her as always and using a section of his robes to wipe the tears from her face.

"It's not…" Lily trailed off biting her lip. "You asked me once if there had ever been anything between Sev and I. Well to be honest there was sort of something."

She shook her head when James' eyes widened in shock as he ran through the many different scenarios where Lily had given Snape her affection and he had to fight to keep from shuddering. "Definitely not what you are thinking," she went on seeing his dark expression. "It's just that I'm pretty sure somewhere along the way Sev developed well…more than friendly feelings for me. It wasn't ever so much anything he said as the way he looked at me."

James watched the blush creep up into her tear-stained cheeks and he smiled softly.

"It was sort of scary at first, realizing my best friend had romantic feelings for me. I didn't know how to react initially but after thinking it over for quite sometime I realized I didn't feel the same way. I could have let him entertain ideas about the two of us. I could have encouraged him and let him build up the nerve to ask me out. I could have let him do his best to make me happy." She explained her eyes getting misty once more.

"But when I really thought about it something…some part of me knew that it wasn't right. I couldn't lead him on that way knowing he would always care more for me than I did for him. It wouldn't have been right. So I sort of discouraged him in small ways to not act on it. Besides, by the time I had fully come to terms with how he was feeling it was nearing the end of October last fall. And that was when things were really starting to become difficult between us."

James sighed, "Because that was around the time he really started to fall in with Mulciber and that lot and you realized that he was entertaining ideas about joining the ranks of the Death Eaters."

Lily nodded. "Yes. I began to question him about it but he would always get defensive and change the subject, often times to you and your attraction for me. I thought he was only feeling protective but now that I think on it I think he also felt threatened by you."

"I was a complete prat back then. I can't really blame the bloke for wanting to keep me away from you. Though I wish he hadn't succeeded quite so efficiently."

James watched as she grinned in amusement.

"You dug your own hole mister Potter, Sev didn't really have much to do with my poor opinion of you. Though he did like to bring up your more offensive acts every now and again just to make sure I still couldn't stand you I think." She trailed off shaking her head. "How odd it is to be sitting here with you now, talking about him and…about how he's hurt me. I never really believed he would you know? I've known him since we were little and he was always there to reassure me that everything would fall into place. That I wasn't a freak like my sister said. That I would be a part of a world that was so spectacular I could barely believe it."

She paused for a second sliding her hands from James' waist and trailing her fingertips along the embroidered GRYFFINDOR lettering that lay on the front of his robes. He did his best not to hold his breath or tighten his grip on her, though his heart began to pound and his pulse raced wildly.

"I never really thought he'd hurt me." She repeated. "But he has. He's chosen them. More than once now…and things will never be the same. I know you think he's horrible for hurting my feelings, but there's just so much history between us, and we have such different ideas of the future…I don't really think he means to. Today was just," she sighed sadly, "the result of the choices he and I have made over the past year or two. Things got out of hand. He said things he didn't mean and I baited him into a lot of it."

James shook his head as much to clear it from his wayward thoughts about her, and her gentle touch, as to display his disagreement.

"He still shouldn't have said the things he did."

Lily shrugged her fingertip running over the Y on his uniform over and over again. "He was angry and so was I. We don't understand each other anymore and that's hard. It's like we are both hanging on to this thread that connects us together but the more time passes the thinner it gets. Sooner or later it could snap and we'll no longer feel there's anything left between us."

"Is it horrible of me to say that I don't really think that sounds like such a bad thing?" James admitted squeezing her gently.

She chuckled. "No. I know why you don't like him."

"Sometimes I think I hate him." He found himself saying. "But then I can't help but think that part of who you are is thanks to him, and I…I find that I can't hate him. Not really. I honestly want to hex him six way from Sunday sometimes though."

She grinned at him and he smiled back.

"I don't know why I turned into such a water fountain today. I suppose it had a lot to do with the fact that I've been angry at him for a long time and that anger has kept me from crying. I guess the dam just broke is all."

He let silence fall between them and for a moment he let himself revel in the fact that she was in his arms and letting him hold her. She hadn't pulled away or looked at him oddly. She was even now still tracing the lettering across his chest, right above his fluttering heart, and looking as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

"Thankyou." She said finally. "For letting me cry all over you and for listening as you did. I know Sev is probably the last person you want to sit here and hear me sob over. And thanks for taking me out of the hall. I would have really been embarrassed to cry so horribly in front of your parents. It's bad enough they saw me as much as they did."

James shook his head looking down at her intently.

"They like you. They wouldn't have cared if you'd bawled hysterically in the middle of the Great Hall. I'm just sorry you felt so upset."

She frowned suddenly her forehead crinkling in irritation.

"What's wrong?"

She turned and looked at him shaking her head.

"I can't believe I wasted pancakes on a day like today." She said sounding really put out by the fact.

James burst out laughing, unable to keep it in. She scowled.

"It's not funny. Normally I'm dead on about these things but I don't think today could have been much worse."

James continued laughing even as she made an exasperated noise and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Your reaction is only strengthening my opinion that I should have eaten _eggs_ this morning." She said making eggs sound like some sort of poisonous substance.

He grinned and looked to his right to see that their ice-cream had melted.

"Well, I don't know if it will make up for the pancakes thing but there's some delicious looking chocolate soup just calling our names."

She turned in his lap to see what he meant and she smiled brightly. She wriggled a little and James, somewhat reluctantly, took the hint and let her turn about and sit upon the bench. She grabbed up her bowl and began to eat.

James followed suit smiling at her between bites.

"So can I ask you something?" She managed after getting halfway through her ice-cream soup.

James nodded prepared for her to ask him some sort of deeply personal question after the events of the afternoon and evening.

"How did you know my favorite flavors of ice-cream?"

He grinned mischievously. "Come now Evans you don't think I spent the past few years annoying you to no end and being hopelessly obsessed with you without picking up on a few things do you?"

She quirked an eyebrow at him.

"So what else do you know about me?"

"Lots of things. I know your favorite color is actually black, despite the fact that other people think that is depressing. You like to read stories where everyone ends up happy in the end, even if it means the plot is sometimes rather predictable. You hate turtleneck sweaters and abhor anything orange colored as you think it clashes with your hair." When her eyes widened James blushed, "And I'm going to stop there before I make an even bigger idiot of myself."

Lily chuckled and elbowed him teasingly, "Oh come on I was just starting to enjoy hearing you recite my likes and dislikes."

James shook his head. "If I told you how much information I had gathered over the years you would probably go running in the opposite direction, as it would probably elevate me to stalker status in your eyes. Though to be truthful a lot of the information I gathered came from Sirius and Remus."

James watched her turn thoughtfully back to her bowl and he sighed in relief that she hadn't questioned him about his liking her further.

"Are we friends James?" She said suddenly. "Like truly?"

"Of course." He replied automatically, aware that his tone betrayed his strong emotions.

"Good." She said firmly. "Then you won't be offended when I do this…"  
Suddenly the remaining contents of her bowl were turned upside down upon his head and she rushed off laughing madly.

"Ohhh you better run! You're in trouble now." He said grabbing his own bowl and taking off after her. "This is war."

****

When James and Lily entered the Gryffindor common room later that night they were both flushed and smiling widely.

"Where have you two been?" Alice demanded, jumping off of Frank's lap to stand and eye them closely. "Marlene said you were upset and that you disappeared together hours ago. We've been waiting for you to show up for ages…Lily what in Godric's name is in your hair?"

James snorted and Lily rounded on him.

"You prat you said you got all of it out!" She accused slapping him on the shoulder lightly.

"I couldn't resist. Besides you never know when you might get a taste for strawberry cre…" He broke off as Lily launched herself at him tackling him to the floor.

"Now see here Potter, just because I was nice enough to pretend you won doesn't mean you have to leave evidence of your victory on my head." She scolded sitting upon his chest and pointing her finger at him. "If this is how you behave after a fair contest I'm inclined to challenge you to a rematch and this time I won't let you win either."

James chuckled. "Let me win? Puh-leaze, you were practically begging me to let you up once I got a hold of that frosting."

"That's not how I remember it. If my memory serves me right you were the one who barricaded himself behind that big island and had to start levitating in reinforcements while I repeatedly launched éclairs at you." Lily replied saucily.

"That's it." James said his eyes sparkling. "We're going back for a rematch and this time you're going to get it."

He sat up taking Lily with him and throwing her over his shoulder. Neither of them seemed to care that their friends were eyeing them with interest and speculation.

"Oh no you don't…we just got most of that mess off of us," She managed through her laughter as James marched toward the portrait hole.

"Do I take that as a forfeit?" He teased.

"Never." She breathed sounding strange from hanging upside down. "But if you don't set me on my feet I'm going to throw-up on you. I think I ate too much of what you were launching at me."

He burst out laughing and set her upright.

"You ate what I threw at you?"

"Only the stuff I caught with my hands." She retorted defensively, though her eyes were glittering happily. "I was hungry okay. Crying takes a lot out of a girl."

"I'll remember that for the next time you soak my clothes," He chuckled, reaching out to the spot where she still had strawberry cream in her hair. "Are you sure I put this here? I don't remember throwing any of it at you."

"That's because you didn't throw it. It was after I got you with the custard. You found that in some big metal bowl and you dumped it over my head and…"

"Wait a second!" Sirius spoke up loudly marching over to where they stood. "You two had a food fight in the kitchens?" He gaped as they nodded. "And you didn't even think to invite me! Never mind the fact that I had to say goodbye to your mum and dad all by myself James. I knew it was odd there were no éclairs at dessert! Éclairs are my favorite you know!"  
They both chuckled madly at Sirius' outrage and James shrugged sheepishly.

"My parents will understand. I'll write them a letter." He looked at Lily intensely as if to say _it was totally worth it._

She blushed.

"Well, I'm going to go shower. I can't believe you'd leave this mess in my hair." Lily shook her head in mock irritation as she headed toward the staircase.

James watched her go his smile stretching across his face.

"Hey Lily," He called out before she disappeared, moving to stand at the bottom of the girl's staircase.

She turned at the top of the landing.

"So maybe it was a pancakes sort of day afterall?" He asked shyly shoving his hands into his pockets and flushing slightly.

She smiled softly and nodded.

"With strawberries on top."

When she disappeared from sight James punched a fist into the air. He clapped Sirius on the back smartly as he made his way to the boys' staircase and ran up it, taking the steps three at a time.

Sirius sighed and moved to re-take his seat next to Remus.

"Well its official. Their both twitter-pated no doubt about it."

****


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note:**

**Okay so I haven't been leaving disclaimers other than on the first chapter and just to make sure it's clear, Anything and Everything Harry Potter related are solely credited to the wonderful mind of J.K. Rowling. **

**To those of you who have been wanting a little more romance (you know who you are ;-) ...don't you?) I want to assure you that later on this story will live up to it's M rating, however i am not the type to just dive into that without having established a firm relationship between characters. The M rating for now is due to the occasional bad language, sometimes suggestive content etc. etc... I promise though that Lily and James will eventually get to the steamy stuff, so no worries there. **

**I also want to put everyone at ease by saying that fairly soon our dear Miss Evans will figure out what she wants from the incredibly sexy James Potter! ...Until then i've got some actual substance to include, like Sirius' luring Snape to the Whomping Willow, James being mad at Sirius for it, Lily kissing James, etc etc...**

**So hopefully I've addressed most of the questions and concerns you've all put forth :) Hopefully you are all still enjoying this story as well. **

**Remember I LOVE reviews and I really appreciate those of you who've left them, thank you! And I have been posting updates on my profile page as to the approximate date that the next chapter will come out as well as a general summary and current title for the next chapter so feel free to check that out as well :)**

**Oh and lastly this is the longest chapter so far! **

**Anyhow, Here goes...**

**Chapter 11**

**A Slip, A Couple of Knees and a Fashion Show**

"So you're telling me that after you cried all over him and poured out your feelings about your horrible ex-best-guy-friend that James just started eating melted chocolate ice-cream with you and telling you about how he knew you really well, followed by you both partaking in a food fight that you initiated?" Alice said summing up the story Lily had told her in her.

"Yea that's pretty much how it went." Lily agreed, curling her legs up a bit to make more room for Marlene to stretch out at the foot of her bed.

When she had emerged from her shower she had found her three friends waiting on her bed and Alice's, prepared to demand details from her at any cost. She had told them everything willingly; even throwing in the parts she wasn't sure she should tell them.

"So he really said, '_I can't make it better unless you tell me what's wrong?'_?" Marlene said her eyes alight with interest.

"Yes."

"And he really held you until you were done crying?" Dorcas put in from the foot of Alice's bed, her face belying how perfect she thought that was.

"Yes."

"And he really threw chocolate sauce all over you?" Alice put in, earning immediate frowns from Dorcas and Marlene. "What I couldn't come up with a better _and-he-really_ question okay." She said defensively. "Besides throwing chocolate sauce all over her is kinda kinky don't you think?"

"It was incredible the way he just picked you up and left with you like that." Dorcas smiled ignoring Alice, her voice going dreamy.

"I agree." Marlene nodded. "It was very…" she paused searching for the right word. "…masculine."

"Yes, masculine." Dorcas nodded. "And so gallant."

"I can't believe I missed it." Alice grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest huffily.

"I'm glad you did. I was a complete idiot. I turned into a watering pot in front of his mother for Merlin's sake!" Lily groaned.

"Oh please they understood completely. In fact I'm almost certain I caught his parents exchanging a pleased look when he left with you." Dorcas reassured.

"It doesn't change the fact that it was embarrassing. I don't typically just go to pieces like that." Lily shook her head thinking back on it.

"Well I for one think this is a very good sign." Alice stated, accepting the newest copy of _Witch Weekly_ from Dorcas and paging through it starting with the end.

"What do you mean?"

Alice looked at Lily seriously. "I mean, I think that James has more than proved he has changed, not to mention the fact that you and he are apparently now close enough for you to share your personal feelings with him. I think that this is a good sign that you might begin to see him in a new way. Afterall, we all know he's over the moon for you."

Lily suddenly felt worried.

"But…I'm not ready for that." She protested her stomach doing an odd sort of turnover at the idea of things progressing between her and James. "I can't think of him like that yet. I mean, we are friends. Good friends? Sure. But still _just_ friends."

"Don't have a panic attack Lils. I'm just saying that you are making strides with him is all." Alice shrugged.

Lily stood suddenly pacing to the foot of Alice's bed and grabbing hold of the post.

"But I…what if he…we just can't. It isn't supposed to be like that. I'm not supposed to just up and like him all of a sudden and then _bang!_ we are together. It should take more time, right?…Merlin what am I saying? Of course it should. I mean just a little while a go I was nearly convinced I'd made a mistake with him and a little before that I didn't even like him. I'm not even sure I do like him. Not like _that_ anyway. Things are good between us. He's nice to me and he…he's there when I need him. We're friends. Friends." Lily looked up feeling panicked. "Right?"

Dorcas reached out from where she sat at the foot of Alice's bed and patted Lily's arm.

"Of course that's what you are. James is happy with that too. He isn't expecting you to just up and start liking him because you two are becoming closer. He's just doing his best to be himself and to behave and to let you get to know him more is all. I don't think you should jump to conclusions here Lil."

Lily nodded but she couldn't calm the unease that was starting to creep up.

"I just don't think I can be what he wants right now." She stated firmly. "I'm his friend and for now that's got to be enough."

"Are you always this panicky when you realize that a guy truly likes you?" Marlene questioned eyeing Lily with interest.

Lily frowned, "I have no idea. Other than James…and I guess Sev, I've never really had anyone like me."

Her friends all began laughing.

"You can't be serious?" Dorcas chuckled. "What the hell did you think Lucas Anderson was all about in fourth year? He wasn't just popping up out of the woodwork for no reason."

"Lucas? That sixth year? But he never mentioned anything to me?"

"That's because the Marauders ran him off after you didn't immediately show an interest." Dorcas explained.

"Oh remember when James hexed Sebastian Hallworth for telling everyone he was going to ask Lily to Hogsmeade." Marlene giggled.

"What? He did that?" Lily cried outraged. "But how come I never knew."

Alice sighed. "Lils you've never been one to pay a whole lot of attention to the opposite sex. It's not a big surprise when you didn't notice that guys liked you. They were usually either put off by your friendship with that _Slytherin_ or persuaded to change their mind by James before you could really catch on to their interest."

Lily shook her head in wonder.

"Well anyway, either way I've never really had to entertain the idea that a guy really likes me, other than the whole thing with Sev and like I said it was just never a mutual thing."

"But with James it might be?" Alice pressed her eyes darting up from her magazine.

"I don't know. Not yet." Lily insisted fervently, hugging Alice's bedpost harder as if by gripping it she could make the strange sensations brought on by thinking about James in a romantic way disappear.

She waited a second before saying softly.

"I sort of invited him to go to Hogsmeade with me next week."

She closed her eyes as her friends all made various noises of excitement.

"That's great." Marlene finally said. "I'm sure you guys will have a great time."

Lily bit her lip unsure of whether to go on. "It's not a date or anything…but it's sort of also his birthday the next day."

"Oh Merlin you're right." Alice gasped. "It's the twenty-seventh isn't it?"

"I'm not sure about whether it's a good idea now." Lily said eyeing Alice's bedpost.

When her friends didn't immediately respond Lily looked up to see they were all sporting similar smiles of mischief.

"Lily dearest, we think that this is a _very_ good idea." Alice said gleefully, tossing her _Witch Weekly_ onto the floor and moving to Lily's trunk where she started digging around.

"What are you doing?" Lily questioned as Dorcas and Marlene got up to look over Alice's shoulder as she searched.

"Picking out your outfit." They all said in unison.

Lily groaned and flopped back onto Alice's bed exhaustedly.

"I knew this was a bad idea." She grumbled.

****

"So where to today then?" Lily excitedly asked the group at large.

They were making their way to Hogsmeade and were coming up on the bridge over the river that fed the lake.

James grinned at her enthusiasm. With classes and such lately they had all needed a break and everyone had been glad for the distraction that going to Hogsmeade provided.

"I think Moony and I are off to Zonko's." Sirius grinned rubbing his hands together conspiratorially. "There's a big box of Fillibuster's just calling my name."

"Well I think I'm going to hit up Scrivenshaft's," Marlene put in. "I've needed some new quills for ages."

"Well I'm in serious need of a Butterbeer," Lily informed, her smile still stretching wide. "So as long as Mr. Potter here is willing, I'm thinking we're headed to the Three Broomsticks."

Sirius chuckled suddenly and pointed to the couple walking ahead of everyone.

"A Galleon says Prewett and Longbottom are headed for Madam Puddifoot's."

James looked ahead to where Frank and Alice were attempting to walk and snog at the same time. He chuckled then looked to Lily.

"The Three Broomsticks is fine with me." He told her grinning as they stepped onto the bridge. "There's enough wind today that I'm feeling a bit chilly anyhow, so a Butterbeer sounds great."

She smiled and opened her mouth to say something when she suddenly slipped on a wet spot and began to fall. James reached out and caught her pulling her to his chest, but he was unable to keep them both upright and he ended up landing on his back with her on top of him, his head hitting the bridge with a _thwack_.

"Oh Merlin, I'm sorry James. Are you alright?"

James looked up at her and grinned. She was just so beautiful. Despite the pain in his head he felt great. Lily Evans was lying atop him and her worried gaze was pinning him to the ground.

She reached out to feel the back of his skull gently.

"Oooh! Ouch, there's a nasty bump forming there." She informed him, her eyes going soft in sympathy. "I'll fix it if you like."

James nodded, his vocal chords temporarily abandoning him. His eyes closed of their own accord as her hand swept through his hair.

_Oh sweet Merlin that feels good._

He choked on the groan that threatened to escape as she played with his hair absentmindedly.

"Thankyou for catching me James," She said softly.

His eyes flew open and his gaze locked with hers. He suddenly felt hot all over and he was even more aware of every inch of her body that was pressed up against his.

"Anytime." He replied as evenly as he could manage.

Her eyes remained locked on his and his arms remained wrapped around her. She had one hand still fixed in his hair while the other lay pressed against his chest.

James knew he only had a matter of seconds before she realized the position that they were in and he was secretly drinking in every moment of having her in his arms. Their gazes were still locked and so he was able to see the change in her emotions.

Her eyes that had been sympathetic before, had switched to grateful as she'd thanked him and were now shifting into something that looked almost like…_desire?_ No. It couldn't be. She wouldn't…but she was. He gasped in surprise as he realized that Lily was looking at him as if she wanted him. As if she were just as pleased by their present arrangement as he was. The emerald green depths were dark and hot and her bottom lip had found its way between her teeth in a gesture that was so bloody seductive he could barely stand it.

James realized he was breathing deeply but he didn't care. He was nearly panting with the effort it was costing him to keep himself from both making noise or moving in fear of her looking away.

Suddenly he saw her eyes shift once more. From the hot desire of a moment before to…_damn_…confusion and something very akin to fear.

James sighed as Lily began to scramble up and off of him. He groaned when her knee grazed a rather sensitive, and somewhat swollen, spot as she stood.

"Oh! Merlin I'm sorry James." She breathed covering her mouth in shock. "I…"

James shook his head and turned, rolling over so that he could more easily push himself to a standing position.

"It's fine. I'm fine." He breathed looking down at his shoes.

"Do you want me to fix the swelling now?" Lily asked shyly.

James sighed. _If only it were that easy._

*****

Lily was mortified. She'd not only stayed on top of him for who knows how long but she'd then proceeded to run her fingers through his hair and…

No. She refused to admit that she'd thought about _that_. She had just been overly grateful is all, she hadn't truly entertained thoughts about her and him and…

She stifled a groan; at least they were walking toward the village once more. After she had patched up his head and had apologized yet again for kneeing him somewhat in a rather uncomfortable place, they'd turned to find their group of friends waiting for them on the other side of the bridge, each one of them wearing an expression of extreme amusement and intrigue.

She had been more than a little thankful when they'd gotten moving and upon Sirius opening his mouth, most likely to make some teasing comment or another, James had growled out a commanding, "Don't."

Sirius had from then on worn a completely knowing expression but had graciously refrained from commenting.

Marlene on the other hand had laughed and said softly in Lily's ear, "You looked like you were enjoying yourself."

In response to which Lily had only managed to flush and stammer before Marlene began laughing again.

"So do you still want to go to the Three Broomsticks?" James asked her suddenly.

Lily started. "What?"

"The Three Broomsticks," He reapeated, "Do you still want to go?"

"Oh..um.." Lily looked around uncertainly. They had reached the village, Alice and Marlene were heading to Scrivenshaft's, Sirius, Remus and Peter were loping off in the direction of Zonko's and Alice and Frank were already no where to be seen.

She suddenly found that she didn't want to be alone with James. Not at all. Yet, it wasn't as if she could just suddenly up and suggest they spend the day trailing along in either his friends, or her friends wake. And she certainly didn't want to go find Alice and Frank as that would make it seem like some sort of double date and…She sighed knowing her only option was staring her in the face.

"Sure." She said. "Sounds good."

James grinned and they fell into step next to each other as they headed toward that end of High Street.

Lily found that her hand was incredibly close to his as they walked and she had the oddest urge to reach out and take it… She crossed her arms over her chest and James quirked an eyebrow at her.

"You cold?"

"Just a little…" She lied. "The wind you know."

"Well we're almost there...I could give you my jacket…"

"No!" She bit out instantly, aware that it would probably smell like him and she didn't know how her traitorous senses would react to that at all. "I mean that's okay. It's just up ahead."

James nodded and quickened their pace a little and Lily couldn't help but smile as she knew it was for her benefit. He opened the door for her and then helped her to remove her jacket. He'd done it tons of times before yet, she couldn't keep the shiver from running down her back as he did so this time.

He grabbed her hand and she gasped lightly.

"Come on there's a booth over there." He said beginning to tug her toward it.

She bit her lip as her mind registered that her hand felt rather good within his. She pondered briefly what else might feel good between them and…

Shit, it was going to be a long day.

*****

Lily was well aware that she had been acting strangely all day. After a lot of one sided conversation on James' part while they were in the Three Broomsticks they headed off to Honeydukes. While there Lily couldn't seem to keep images of her and James feeding each other chocolate out of her head, despite how ridiculously cliché that was. She knew he noticed her behavior from the start but he didn't comment on it, even when she only bought a box of Chocolate Frogs and a few Witches Delights. In contrast he bought double what he usually did and quirked an eyebrow at her as if daring her to comment on it.

From there they went to Zonko's where she was able to relax a bit since Sirius and Remus were still inside, who knew where Peter had run off to, and James was busy talking with them in the back of the shop for a time.

She made her way over to a large display of some sort of slime that slithered and hid behind it her back to the door of the establishment. Her stomach had been out of sorts all day. Every time James smiled at her or laughed at something it had done flips. Peeking out from behind the display at him she got near instant butterflies. He was just so bloody handsome. How had she ignored it for so long? She ducked back behind the display feeling annoyed.

Stupid Alice and her stupid comments, this was all her fault. If she hadn't mentioned the fact that the way was practically paved for Lily and James to start dating she would never have started feeling like this… or would she?

She couldn't deny that things had been moving along steadily between her and James for quite some time and that she had already re-shaped her entire opinion of him. Yet she held back from any thoughts of him and her being together because it just seemed too fast. She had only been on good terms with him for around nine months or so, and they had only been back at school for almost seven…ugh! Who was she kidding, that was long enough.

Time had nothing to do with her not wanting to think about him that way.

She nearly jumped a foot in the air when she felt a tap on her shoulder.

"Um… sorry I didn't mean to startle you, though I do tend to have that effect on females."

Lily had turned about to find herself staring at Gilderoy Lockhart. She knew little about him other than that he was in her year and rumored to be somewhat of a ladies man around Hogwarts, thanks mostly to his good looks. Alice had once told her that there was nothing behind his pretty face and that she didn't know how on earth the boy had become a Ravenclaw. Lily soon found herself agreeing with her friend.

The boy in front of her was dressed rather flamboyantly in expensive looking robes with a lot of embellishment. He was average in height and build but he did possess a rather handsome face. His eyes were blue and his teeth were attractively white and strait.

"I'm sorry I startled you Lily. It is okay if I call you Lily?"

She opened her mouth to answer but he didn't give her the time.

"I'm Gilderoy Lockhart, though you probably knew that already. What am I saying? Of course you did, most girls do. I'm the seeker for the Ravenclaw team you know?"

Lily stared at him for a moment in utter confusion.

"Um yes I've uh, seen you around."

"Naturally." He said winking and flashing her that brilliantly white smile. "So Lily, I was wondering if you'd like to head over to Madam Puddifoot's with me?"

"Actually I…" Lily began looking for James, suddenly cursing herself for hiding behind such a large display case.

"Of course I don't mind what you're wearing at all. If you have the misfortune of only owning muggle clothes I'm not one to look down on you for that. Though we could stop by Gladrags on the way if you'd like to shop a bit."

Lily looked at him in open mouthed shock, "Excuse me? I don't…"

"It's perfectly alright to feel somewhat nervous you know. I usually am a tad bit on first dates as well." He said reaching out and grabbing her hand so that he could pat it softly. "But it's quite alright, afterall we've been admiring each other for awhile now. I mean we are practically an item as it is."

She frowned at him suddenly very aware of what it was like to try and converse with a lunatic.

"Your off your rocker if you think that we…"

Suddenly he placed a finger over her lips and made a dramatic shushing sound.

"Don't speak. It's not necessary. I already know what you want…"

"I don't think s…"

Suddenly he had grabbed the back of her head and was leaning down rather slowly and dramatically as if to kiss her. His eyes were closed and Lily was stunned. Her second _real_ kiss and it was going to come from a stuck up, irrational, narcissistic lunatic... Not fucking likely.

She struggled slightly trying to get him to loosen his grip on the back of her head to no avail. That's when suddenly her morning accident with James came to mind.

Without giving it much thought she placed her hands on his ribs and jerked her knee up quickly, hitting home. He dropped instantly. His anguished groan filled the shop and Lily found herself blushing madly as all eyes were suddenly on them.

James, Sirius and Remus rounded the corner to find her standing next to a red faced and moaning Gilderoy.

"What happened here?" James asked worriedly.

Lily flushed even deeper and began to shift her weight from foot to foot.

"He believed we were very nearly an item and I relieved him of his false assumption." She replied as evenly as she could.

Gilderoy began coughing violently, his face turning a violent shade of scarlett, and Lily shot him a mildly apologetic but mostly annoyed look. He groaned and rolled onto his back still cupping himself.

"Shit Evans!" Sirius exclaimed suddenly. "Did you…"

"Well obviously." She replied irritably. The whole day was beginning to wear on her and she was suddenly rather defensive. She turned about and began marching toward the door and the three boys followed quickly in her wake.

"I wouldn't have pegged you as the sort to knee a fellow where it hurts Lily-flower. Much less to do so twice in one day." Sirius teased as they began walking up the street.

"The first time was an accident and it barely grazed him and you know it!" Lily informed him her eyes on her destination of the Three Broomsticks. "And as for that…" She stopped suddenly to turn and point at Zonko's and the three boys were forced to halt next to her. "I wasn't about to let some snobby, narcissist who apparently lives in a fantasy world kiss me without my consent, just because in his mixed-up reality we've liked each other for ages, especially not when I've only allowed one normal fellow to kiss me in my entire life!"

She was breathing hard when she was through and it took her a long moment to realize what she'd said.

"Oh Merlin," She gasped in a weak voice burying her face in her hands. She would not, could not, look at James.

She was surprised when she was enveloped in a strong embrace and she peeked between her fingers to see Sirius.

"Come on miss _I've only ever kissed one bloke in my life_. Let's get a Butterbeer. You look like you need one." He chuckled keeping his arm around her as he steered her away.

"Don't tease me." She said whacking him softly on the stomach.

"I'm not going to." He replied grinning. "Though, I will say that I'm rather impressed with your track record. I would have assumed you'd kissed at least five guys. Afterall we've been chasing them away by the cauldron-load for years."

Lily smiled softly. "Yeah well your efforts worked out better than expected. I never even knew any of those guys liked me until my friends told me a few days ago."

"For real?" Sirius grinned pushing the door to the Three Broomsticks open and leading her in. As he helped her remove her coat he said, "If James had known that maybe he wouldn't have lost so much sleep over the years."

Lily smiled but inside she was reeling. How come it seemed like everything always came back to her and James?

****

James stood outside still motionless and in shock watching as Lily disappeared into the pub with Sirius. Once they were out of sight he grabbed Remus and said breathlessly.

"Do you have any idea what this means?"

Remus grinned.

"I have no idea Prongs." He replied as James' grip on his shoulder became tighter.

"She's only ever kissed one guy Moony. Just one!" James said enthusiastically. "I can't believe it! Just one bloody guy…"

"Is there a reason that Lily only kissing one guy is significant to you, other than the obvious reason being that you're pleased you only have to murder one bloke?" Remus quipped lightly.

"Oh there won't be any murdering mate because if she's only kissed one bloke…just one in her whole life…if that's true, then Lily Evans has only ever kissed _me_!"

****

That evening at dinner James knew Lily was still feeling strangely, whether about that morning or about what she'd said he didn't know…perhaps is was both. She was uncharacteristically quiet and had refused to meet his eyes for the rest of the day after her slip-up. He kicked her foot with his from where she sat across from him.

She turned to him startled, before she blushed and looked away once more. James sighed and knocked her foot again. He watched as she fought some sort of internal battle before turning to look at him.

He smiled softly at her before mouthing silently, "I'm sorry."

She frowned at him looking to her right where the rest of their friends were talking animatedly before mouthing back, "For what?"

James bit his lip and shook his head. He pointed toward the doors to the Great Hall and Lily nodded but pointed to her food. James smiled, she wanted to finish her food first.

Once they were both done eating they got up and left together. Once outside the doors to the Great Hall James said sincerely,

"I'm sorry if I've made you feel weird today."

Lily sighed and replied seriously, "You haven't I promise."

"Then I'm sorry I took your first kiss…even if it was unknowingly."

He didn't look at her after he said it, he knew she was flushed with embarrassment.

"It's alright James." She said finally her voice soft. "In a way I'm…sort of glad it was you."

He nodded and did his best to keep the smile off of his face, while inside he was rejoicing.

"I'm glad it was me too." He said arrogantly, puffing out his chest, knowing it would cause her to react.

"Of course you are." She replied laughing softly.

She paused for a moment as if debating with herself as to whether or not to continue.

"I probably shouldn't say this, but as far as first kisses go…it was pretty amazing."

James smiled outright and put his arm about her shoulders.

"You know Lily, us being friends is wonderful for my ego."

She smiled softly and just shook her head at him.

"So are you looking forward to your birthday tomorrow?" She asked genuinely.

James grinned, "Yup. Then we'll be the same age again. It's weird you being older than me."

"I've never really thought about it before." She replied then added impishly. "I think you're going to like your present from me."

"What is it?" James questioned knowing it was a futile to try and get her to tell him.

"I'm not telling. You're just gonna have to wait until tomorrow."

"I'm sure I'll love it." He said seriously.

They didn't say anything more and when they got back to the common room James told her goodnight and she did the same to him but he was thankful at least that she already seemed more relaxed with him in general.

****

James was awakened the next morning as he was pretty much every year on his birthday, with Sirius shouting at him at the crack of dawn.

"Wake up Prongsie! You've got presents!" He bellowed jumping up and down on James' bed.

Remus groaned, "What happened to us jinxing him to stick to his bed in the middle of the night so he couldn't do this this year?"

James chuckled, still being bounced up and down by Sirius, "I guess we forgot."

"How does he get up and get dressed without any of us waking up all the time?" Peter put in as he slipped from his four-poster and came to stand next to James'.

"I have no idea." James chuckled and reaching up suddenly grabbed Sirius by his legs causing him to lay flat on the bed. "Are you going to let me open my presents or not?"

"I sure am." Sirius grinned cheekily. "One of them smells amazing! I'm guessing it's from Evans."

Two spots of color appeared high on James' cheeks but he just shook his head and reached for the pile of gifts at the foot of his bed.

He was stunned to find Remus, Peter and Sirius had gone in together to get him the expensive shin guards that he hadn't gotten for Christmas. Surprisingly Dorcas, Marlene and Alice had all gone in as well and given him a jumble of things ranging from a book called _The Trickster's Guide to Mischief and Mayhem_, a broomstick maintenance kit, and a box of Chocolate Frogs. His parents had sent him the traditional coming of age wizard's gift of a watch, that judging from the looks of they had spent a long time adding things to and designing.

The last box was of medium size and was wrapped up in shiny red paper and tied with Gold ribbon. James knew before opening it that it was from Lily, and for some reason it did smell amazing, because it smelled like her. Inside he found something he hadn't expected.

Picking up the folded note that had been placed inside he read,

_James,_

_Happy Seventeenth! _

_I hope you like this. I couldn't really think of what to get you that you didn't already have and when I did come up with ideas Alice, Marlene and Dorcas stole them (hence their gift being a collection of things). So the only thing I could think of was this. _

_They are all my favorites, plus some that I thought you would like. I know you might not have a way of listening to them here but don't worry, I've got that all figured out as well, because when you are done going through this part of your present the other half is sitting in the common room. _

_Yours,_

_Lily_

"Oooh Prongs. Look, she gave you muggle things." Sirius chortled excitedly pulling the different items from the box.

All in all she had given him around fifteen records from varying muggle artists. He was grinning by the time he'd gotten to the end.

"I've got a player for my wizarding albums back home but…I've never really thought to look into muggle music." He was somewhat surprised at himself for not having thought to broaden his horizons sooner.

"So let's see we've got more than one album from the Beatles. We have the Rolling Stones, Credence Clearwater Revival, Aerosmith, Led Zeppelin …" Sirius said going through them enthusiastically.

"How much are you willing to bet that downstairs she's got a muggle record player charmed to work within Hogwarts." Remus put in grinning impishly.

James smiled widened as he jumped off his bed, Sirius right on his heels and dashed out the door and down the stairs. Sure enough sitting on one of the tables near the fire was a record player with a red bow stuck to it and a card that read _Property of James Potter, Hands Off!_

Sirius was rubbing his hands together in excitement as James picked it up and carted it up the stairs.

"So what are we going to listen to first?" Remus asked rifling through James' new albums.

"Well lets go with….this one!" Sirius snatched one off the bed and rushed to where James was setting up the record player on the floor.

"She left a card for instructions in case I'd never used one before but these are pretty similar to the wizarding ones, except that they don't change the record themselves or automatically start over when the record is through," James explained taking the record from Sirius, who had removed it from it's case, and putting it in place.

James grinned as the first lines to Credence Clearwater Revivals 'Fortunate Son' began to fill their dorm. He was really going to have to thank Lily for her gift.

****

Lily woke to the sounds of Aerosmith's 'Walk This Way' and she looked around confused. It took her a moment to realize she was in fact still at Hogwarts and not at home having left her record player running.

She grinned when she realized it must be James. She looked at her bedside clock and saw that it was only seven fifteen. She jumped up and rushed to the door of the girls' dormitory and flinging it open found the noise wasn't coming from the common room as she had thought, but was in fact being blasted from the sixth year boys' dorm so loudly that it filled the whole of Gryffindor Tower.

She shook her head, grinning madly, and made her way down the girls' staircase and headed toward James' dormitory. As she approached she realized there was a crowd of boys gathered in the doorway to James' room. She pushed through them and finally emerged in the midst of James, Sirius, Remus and Peter showing off their new item to Gideon, Frank and the other seventh year boys.

The music was so loud she wasn't sure how they could even hear each other talking over it and putting her hands over her ears she waited for someone to notice her standing there.

After a moment or two Sirius turned, seemingly to address the boys gathered at the door, and his mouth fell open upon seeing Lily. She grinned at him, her hands still covering her ears, thinking he was shocked to see her in the boys' dorm.

His mouth still open he backed up silently until he was next to James. Reaching out blindly his eyes still on Lily he grabbed ahold of James robes and pulled on him. James turned looking at him curiously before he turned and caught sight of what Sirius was looking at.

His jaw dropped and so did the record he was holding, it landed awkwardly on its side and rolled across the floor before landing flat a few feet from where Lily stood. Suddenly the music was turned down to a tolerable level.

Lily looked to Remus who was grinning impishly and smiled at him thankfully.

"Good morning." She said turning her smile to James and Sirius.

"Fuck yea it is." Sirius said throatily. James merely continued to stare at her as if he couldn't quite register that she was real.

"Um…" she began feeling nervous under their scrutiny, "You know I could hear that all the way in the sixth year girls' dorm?"

She moved forward when they didn't react and bent over to retrieve the record. A few odd groaning noises reached her ears and Lily frowned, standing up again and tossing her hair over her shoulder to look at the crowd in the doorway.

It took James a moment to react before suddenly he was striding to the door and saying irritatedly.

"Shows over, get the hell out!" He forcibly shoved a few younger students out of his dorm before slamming the door in their faces. He leaned his forehead against the wood for a moment before turning around and looking at Lily oddly.

"So I take it you liked your present?" She said feeling incredibly nervous now that James was staring at her with an intensity the likes of she'd never seen.

He opened his mouth to answer when Sirius said suddenly,

"For the love of Helga Hufflepuff Evans is that what you always sleep in?"

Lily turned and looked at him oddly not understanding before looking down at her attire and blushing madly. She hadn't thought about her clothes when she had woken up because she was too excited about talking with James about his present. Looking down she realized she was clad in only her tiny black satin shorts, that could nearly be considered underwear, and a skimpy white tank-top that was somewhat sheer. She instantly crossed her arms over her chest.

Sirius' eyes widened slightly with her movements and he cleared his throat. He looked to Remus who was digging around in James' trunk as if he were a safe haven of some sort. Lily refused to look at Peter who it appeared was fervently ogling her chest.

Lily wanted to hug Remus when he emerged with one of James' quidditch shirts. He tossed it to her and Lily pulled it over her head with a quickness she didn't know she possessed. The shirt reached her thighs below her shorts and she couldn't help but grin a little despite her embarrassment.

"So anyway I think I'll just come back later." She said biting her lip. "You know…when I'm properly dressed and all that." She nodded firmly as if answering her own question and turned to make her way out of the dorm and her eyes met James.

He looked like he was being put through torture and rapture simultaneously as he stared at her, his back still planted against the door. His eyes were dark and smoldering hotly and Lily had to swallow the very feminine gasp that threatened to escape her at the sight of him.

"I…" She began tentatively unsure of what to say or how to say it.

James merely nodded. His Adam's apple bobbing enticingly as he swallowed.

_Get a freaking hold on yourself Lily, _she internally scolded,_ Adam's apple's aren't enticing!_

She moved forward and James stiffly pulled the door open for her, thankfully the crowd outside it had cleared off. As she passed by him she paused and their eyes met.

It was only a second of shared intensity but it was there just the same. In that one swift look Lily found her stomach turning and her instincts railing at her to go into his arms and let things happen as they would. It was as if all of her senses were reaching out to him, begging her to let him touch her. The emotions of the day before had returned full force sending her stomach into a frenzy of knots and loops and whooshes. Her mind reeled at the thought that she was reacting to James in a sexual way…because there was no doubt about it, the look he was giving her was sexual to its core.

She jerked her eyes away and rushed out the door. Moving swiftly she made it to her dormitory and flew into the bathroom. She quickly turned on the shower and stripping down she moved under the warm spray.

_I do not want James Potter. I do not want James Potter. I do not WANT James Potter._

Over and over again as her heart thudded and her breathing remained rapid she tried to convince herself that what she was telling herself was fact and not wishful thinking.

Lily found herself sliding to the floor as she realized with shocking clarity, that for the first time in her life she was lying to herself.

****

James closed the door with a soft snap before turning and sinking down to the floor to lean back against it.

"Prongs mate," Sirius began sounding floored, "If I ever questioned your taste in women, I firmly and wholeheartedly withdraw my doubts."

James closed his eyes and put his head in his hands. He didn't need his best friend to tell him that she was flawlessly perfect, he had known that already. The problem was he had just had her stunning perfection flaunted in front of him and he was staggering with how it had made him feel.

Merlin he'd wanted her. When he'd turned around to see her standing there in less clothes than he'd ever seen her wear in his life, with her hair sexily disheveled and her grin in place, he'd felt like the floor had been pulled out from underneath him. He had wanted to rush to her and pull her into his arms and do things to her that were frowned upon in polite society...and some were probably illegal. She had just looked so bloody sexy, how could anyone blame him for feeling shocked out of his mind.

He'd sighed. He hadn't said a word to her. Remus had been the only one in the room who had kept his cool and James owed him big time. If it had been up to him to do something he probably would have found himself in deep shit for trying something inappropriate.

He stood shakily, still half aroused at the thought of her.

"I'm going to take another shower." He supplied moving toward the bathroom and not looking at any of his friends.

"I don't blame you mate." Sirius said sympathetically as he disappeared from view.

Gideon chuckled at the exchange and then said smiling cheekily.

"You know if he ever does manage to get with Evans I'll count him as one of the luckiest blokes in history."

****


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note:**

**I am so sorry about the delay! Life is hectic, but I've got this out to you now thank goodness. **

**To **Fixation33**= thankyou so much for letting me know my timeline was off. I originally planned out this whole story without the whole Whomping Willow thing but then for some reason I got turned around and I thought "What the heck am I doing? I'm leaving the whole thing out!" at which point I proceeded to change said storyline but am now back on track with the original thanks to you reassuring me that it was in fact before their sixth year that the whole thing went on. *sigh* Now I can relax and not worry about it. **

**To anyone wanting a plotline update please read ^the above acknowledgment because there will be no whomping willow/sirius/severus/angry James goings on in the next few chapters. Check my profile if you want to know what the next chapter will involve :)**

**To **123migit456 **I fixed the whole double Alice's thing, thanks for letting me know about the mistake :)**

**Thankyou to everyone who reviewed I love hearing all that you guys have to say and I've really enjoyed all the great feedback I've been getting on this story. Please keep up the reviews and keep letting me know what you all think. **

**Here goes..**

**The Best Birthday Ever**

**Chapter 12**

"Lily you can't be serious? It's just breakfast for Merlin's sake!" Marlene insisted still trying to get Lily to take the clothes she was offering her and to put them on.

"I can't not after this morning. It was…" She buried her face in her hands still completely mortified.

"So you showed up in James' room in booty shorts and a nearly see-through top so what." Marlene said rolling her eyes. "It's not like it's the end of the world. Besides you can't avoid them forever."

"Just watch me." Lily replied stubbornly crossing her arms over her chest.

Alice appeared then coming through the door, looking rather amused.

"Well it's not as bad as you think. Apparently your little fashion show this morning is the talk of the tower but not necessarily in a bad way. Most of the younger male students are now in love with you, in some form or another, and the older ones are," Alice paused to grin impishly, "respectfully admiring of you. Frank said that after you left James was a bit out of sorts but that he doesn't think it will be too weird."

Lily groaned and flopped back into her pillows.

"Stop being melodramatic about it," Marlene chastised. "Just get up and get dressed and let's go. You shouldn't mope about just because some guys saw you in your pajamas."

Lily knew she was right. She just didn't want to admit to them that the real reason she didn't want to go downstairs was because she couldn't shake the feeling that had begun when she'd locked eyes with James that morning and she didn't want to admit to herself that her wish to avoid him stemmed entirely from fear of the unknown. But when had she ever been the type to let fear rule her actions?

She stood slowly and grabbed the clothing from her friend.

She certainly wasn't the type to let panic overrule her good sense, even if that fear was even now pressing down on her stomach and making her feel rather queasy.

A half hour later, Lily and her friends made their way down to the Great Hall for breakfast.

When Lily caught sight of James she sucked in her breath.

_Damn._

He looked absolutely gorgeous and the sight of him instantly made her stomach start turning. The strange butterfly sensation that she had gotten from seeing him at the train station and in Diagon Alley, and all day in Hogsmeade was back in full force.

She stopped dead in her tracks; her mind reeling as she internally struggled with a 'stay or flee' debate.

She was having trouble processing the whole thing. Her feelings about that morning, her feelings about the day before and her change in feelings for him altogether were all running through her head. She couldn't like James already could she?

The truth was she could, she just didn't want to acknowledge it as a definite possibility. She didn't want to think of James as more than a friend yet, and she definitely didn't want things to become awkward between them.

He smiled shyly when he saw her still frozen in the middle of the Great Hall and her chest clenched.

_Double damn._

"Seriously Lils," Marlene said coming back over to her and grabbing her by the elbow, "Get over it."

When they reached the table Lily sat next to Dorcas, refusing to take her now typical seat next to James. There was a moments' silence while everyone processed the new arrangement before Marlene cleared her throat and said,

"Well James apparently you liked Lily's birthday present."

For some reason the innocent words made James think back to seeing her that morning and he flushed slightly.

"Yeah," He answered his voice sounding somewhat thick. "It's pretty cool."

"Try amazingly perfect. James loves music. It's a wonder he didn't branch out into muggle stuff before this." Sirius put in grinning madly. "I love it as well. I mean I'd never even heard of some of those artists."

As his friends launched into conversation about the records and the gift and muggle culture James watched Lily. She was biting her lip and looking from the waffles to the eggs in a rather torn sort of way. Just as she was reaching for the ladle to scoop some eggs he leaned across the table stretching past Sirius and in front of Dorcas and grabbed Lily's wrist.

"Nope." He said firmly.

Lily sighed. "Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No." He bit out more firmly than before.

"I don't get it." Sirius said craning his neck to try and see around James' body. "What are they arguing about?"

Their friends all shrugged and looked to where James still held Lily's wrist. She was refusing to look him in the eye and he was doing his best to make her.

"How do you know?" She said glumly setting the elbow of her other arm on the table and planting her chin in her palm.

"Because it's not a big deal Lily," James put in reassuringly, knowing she would understand that he was talking about that morning. "Besides it's my birthday, so if you don't move away from the eggs and at least eat waffles I'm going to be really upset."

He was smiling as he let her wrist go and sat back down. Their friends looked from her to him curiously not understanding at all. James waited to see what she would do. He sighed in satisfaction when she pulled her hand back and looked over at him.

"Could you pass me a few strawberries please James?"

"That's my girl." He grinned and grabbed a few off the fruit tray putting them on a small plate and handing them over.

Lily smiled at him before rolling her eyes.

"I still don't get it. Why does Lily have to eat waffles?" Sirius questioned looking from Lily to James and back again.

"Because it isn't an eggs kind of day Padfoot." James answered grinning madly.

Sirius looked down at his own breakfast and sighed dramatically before saying sadly, "Well I wish someone would have told me that sooner."

Lily burst out laughing uncontrollably.

That afternoon the Marauders, Lily, Dorcas, Marlene and Alice were all lounging about by the lake, near the trees.

"So where's Frank?" Dorcas questioned curiously, as he and Alice were usually inseperable.

"He's got to study. With NEWTs coming up he can't really afford to spend all his free time with me."

The others nodded in understanding.

"I don't want to have to take those awful things." Lily put in.

She was laying in the sun her eyes closed and her head resting on James' rucksack. It was just too nice of a spring day to spend it anywhere but outdoors.

"I don't think anyone does Lil." Marlene chuckled.

"You know if you keep on laying in the sun like that you're going to burn." Alice informed her cheekily. "Remember that time in fourth year?"

Her friends began to laugh and Lily sat up scowling. "I can't help how fair skinned I am and it's not my fault if I really like the sun."

"Well we told you you were going to burn. But you didn't listen and it ended up you had to go to the infirmary to get your skin healed up." Alice went on giggling at the memory.

"That was the day her face nearly matched her hair." Dorcas added chuckling.

"I don't remember that." Remus said frowning.

"That's because Lily didn't want anyone to know that she did it so she ran from out here all the way to the dorms and didn't go to the infirmary until late that night." Marlene replied.

Lily flopped back down onto the grass.

"Well I looked dreadful. I wasn't about to let people see me looking like a walking tomato."

"I doubt you looked dreadful." James put in smiling.

"That's because you didn't see her." Alice said winking at James.

"You know, it's times like this that I consider getting new friends. I can't believe you lot…." Lily paused as she felt the sun leave her face. She cracked open her eyes and looked up to see Sev standing over her.

"We need to talk." He said simply.

Lily sighed and sat up slowly.

"No we don't."

"I disagree."

"Well I don't care." She bit out. "I think our last conversation pretty much laid it all out there. What you did, or didn't, say was pretty straight-forward."

He bent his knees and crouched down next to her. "Does it help at all if I say I'm sorry, for everything?"

Lily sighed and looked pointedly out at the lake. If she looked left she would see the disapproving looks on her friends' faces and if she looked right she would see the pleading one on Sev's.

"Sorry only gets you so far Sev. And too many of them will begin to get you nowhere."

He sighed and stood suddenly.

"I'm trying here Lily." He bit out in frustration.

She stood and began to walk a little ways away from her friends, and out of hearing distance.

"What are you trying? Are you trying to be my friend again, because it sure doesn't look that way when you spend all your time with the Death Eater Wannabes. Are you trying to keep me from making a mistake? Well I don't think I'm making one. Not with James, not with the rest of the Marauders and…not with you. We aren't who we used to be Sev. We aren't those little kids anymore."

Lily watched as his eyes clouded with anger.

"You think I don't know that. You think I don't realize that we aren't eight years old and dreaming about how perfect life will be one day? I'm not stupid Lily. I can see that we aren't who we used to be…either of us. But that doesn't change the fact that I can't help but think you're making a mistake here. James Potter is…"  
"My friend." Lily interrupted suddenly feeling very defensive when it came to James. "Whether or not you approve of it. I've gotten to know him this year and I he's not the person you or I thought he was. I like him. I enjoy spending time with him. He makes me laugh..."

"That's because he's a clown. He doesn't take anything seriously. He's a…where are you going?"

Lily had begun to walk back in the direction of her friends and Severus was right on her heels.

"I'm not going to stand there and listen while you speak ill of him. We've had this conversation, plenty of times in fact, but I no longer agree with you."  
She stopped suddenly and turned to face him.

"Seriously Sev what are you doing?" She asked tiredly. "What's the point in coming up to me to rehash all this all the time? Why can't you just let things go? You aren't going to change, you've admitted that. And neither am I. So let's just leave it at that and save ourselves the heartache. I can't keep doing this with you. I can't keep arguing and trying to make you see things the way I do. And you can't keep doing the same."

They stared at each other, each lost in their own thoughts. She knew he realized the truth of her words and yet she also knew that some part of him wouldn't settle for letting things go. He didn't seem to be able to let _her_ go.

"You know I just can't sit idly by and watch you slip away." He said sounding choked.

"Then be my friend again. Quit acting like you have been. Quit spending time with those…"

"Oh it's as easy as that right? Quit behaving like you do Sev. Quit hanging out with your friends. Quit being who you are." He retorted hotly stepping closer to her and making her back up.

"You know very well that's not what I meant."

"Do I? Because from my standpoint it seems like you want me to change to fit into your way of thinking. You want me to think and act and behave in a manner that's acceptable to _you_. You're being a hypocrite Lily. In the same way that I want you to change to make me happy you want me to do the same." He intoned.

Lily was silent for a minute processing his words. She eventually nodded.

"You're right. You're absolutely right. And I get that it isn't fair that we are both standing on opposite sides of this chasm and it just keeps growing. You keep building your bridge only for me to burn it and I keep building mine only to have you do the same. But honestly Sev as unfair as it is I think we just both need to let it go." She insisted. "Just let me let it go."

He stared at her oddly for a moment before shaking his head.

"No. It's not in me to do that and you know it."

Lily sighed, "I'm going back to my friends now Sev."

She turned and began to walk away again but he stayed with her.

"We aren't finished with this."

"Right now we are. I don't want to end up crying my eyes out all over James' shirt again Sev. So as of right now the conversation is over."

She realized her mistake right after the words were free and she knew before he even opened his mouth that the next thing he said was going to be ugly.

"All over Potter's shirt huh? So he's taken to comforting you now. Well that's just fantastic. I'm so glad that Saint Potter can come to the rescue all the time." He growled and Lily sped up trying to get back to her friends before he got overly vicious. "So I suppose I should start believing all the rumors I hear then, like that you're sleeping with him. That you're whoring yourself out to him and his friends."

Lily swallowed the lump in her throat. "You know that's all bullshit."

"Oh really? So you weren't in his room wearing practically nothing this morning?"

_Damn, news travels fast in Hogwarts. _She thought irritably.

Lily didn't answer she had reached her friends again and she was ready to end the conversation.

"I'll see you around Sev." She said turning to face him.

"Answer the question Lily." He fumed.

"Just leave Sev."

"So you were. It's true then. You've been sleeping with him?" He stated flatly his eyes going black as coal and his shoulders tensing.

Lily put her hands to her temples and squeezed her eyes shut. "Just stop it!"

"Just answer the fucking question!"

"YES! It's true! It's all TRUE!" She burst out yelling hotly, stepping up to him so they were chest to chest. "I've slept with James! Tons! All the time in fact! And it's fantastic! Really mind-blowing! And I've taken to spending the night in his room instead of mine! It makes it easier you know for when I decide to have a go with one of his friends instead! I'll have you know I've gotten to be quite the talented slag, so good in fact that I'm sure one of these days he'll make me his little muggleborn mistress! I mean I could never marry him, he's a precious Pureblood and I'm a Mudblood right! But that's just fine with me I don't mind letting him use me, I'm easy like that Right Sev! I mean it makes sense right! If I'm hanging out with James, well then of course I'm sleeping with him because I suppose I'm not good enough to be with him openly! And I guess I lack the self-respect and decency to not become a WHORE!"

She shoved him in the chest, pushing him away from her.

"You'd better go, I mean Merlin knows what sort of slutty things I might get up to next, probably right out here on the grass!" She glared at him as she finished.

He looked at her sadly and said softly, "I'm sorry Lily. I'm…really sorry."

As he walked away she watched him leave and she sighed. She was so tired of doing this with him, of always having to end things with her mad and him apologizing. She was just…very tired.

She turned around and went back to where James' bag still lay. Not saying anything to her friends she just lay back down and closed her eyes soaking up the warmth of the sun.  
She ignored the silent tears that ran out of the corners of her eyes and she waited until they dried on her cheeks to say.

"Sorry about that."

None of her friends answered at first and Lily opened her eyes to see that they'd all come to lie in the grass around her.

"Wasn't your fault." Alice told her giving her calf a squeeze.

Lily nodded.

"Well I for one am really disappointed in you Lily-Flower." Sirius said sitting up and looking over at her from the other side of Marlene, his face a mask of severity. "Here I find out that not only have you been having mind-blowing shagging sessions with Prongs but that you've been letting Moony and Wormtail share in the fun while I am left with absolutely no memory whatsoever of you slipping from Prongs' bed and making your way into mine. I mean honestly I know there's no keeping up with Prongsie but I'm sure I could do better tha…" He jumped up and began to run cackling madly, as James leapt up to chase him.

Lily laughed watching the two of them race about like little kids.

"Come now Prongs I mean if you're going to share your mistress with Wormy and Moony I would think that as your…" Sirius paused and made a mad dash jumping between and over Lily and her friends as James had nearly caught him. "…as your best mate that you'd want to share with me first. Though…" He chuckled as James tackled him to the grass. "…my birthday is coming up and if you were planning on surprising me I promise I'll pretend I'm shocked to find Evans under the covers."

Lily was laughing along with their friends at his words and she decided that if Sirius could help her find humor in the situation then she could at least join in the joke.

"So do you prefer red or black lingerie?" She called out grinning impishly.

"My name's not Black for nothing honey." Sirius called out cackling as James slugged him in the arm.

The rest of James' birthday passed rather pleasantly. And Lily found herself having fun as they ate dinner and hung out in the common room. Sirius even presented James with a rather misshapen looking chocolate cake with vanilla icing.

"He makes it himself every year. Don't ask me how he's talked the elves into letting him do it but at least he's improved over time." Remus informed the girls as Sirius lit the candles.

"Make a wish Prongs ol' boy." Sirius said as they finished singing him Happy Birthday.

They all laughed when James scrunched up his face like a five year old, pretending to think very hard, before blowing out the candles.

Lily, though not a huge cake fan, was enjoying Sirius' efforts and leaning against the wall near the fireplace when James came and sat down beside her.

"Hey." He said softly.

Lily's stomach flipped over as she replied just as softly, "Hey."

"How are you doing?"

She sighed knowing he was referring to the whole day in general. "It was a long day and I'll be honest I hope your next birthday doesn't involve any wardrobe issues or fights with Sev. But all in all after spending the morning with you guys and the afternoon after I calmed down I think it turned out to be a waffles with strawberries sort of day after all, almost borderline pancakes."

James grinned and took a bite of his cake before bringing up what was bothering him.

"Sometimes I wonder if it's not more of a hassle for you to be my friend than not."

Lily frowned at his words and turned toward him.

"I don't care if it's a hassle or not. It isn't, but even if it was it would be worth it because you're my friend and I care about you. We've been through a lot these last few months and you've been wonderful putting up with all the crying and the fighting with Sev and the stupid rumors that keep flying around. Come to think of it it's probably more of a hassle for you to be friends with me than the other way around. So trust me James being your friend is worth whatever comes along with it." She insisted.

He nodded and swiped the last of his cake from his plate, setting it on the floor next to him.

"Well I'm glad you don't feel like you'd rather call it quits." He answered shifting and sinking down so that her shoulder touched his.

Lily's stomach was suddenly up in her throat at the contact and she didn't trust her voice at all. That was when she most definately came to the realization that she'd been fighting for awhile.

_Sweet Merlin, I have a _crush_ on James Potter!_

She tried to keep her breathing normal and to not let him see the effect he was having on her as she spoke.

"So did I ever actually say 'happy birthday' to you today?"

He looked at her their faces now rather close together.

"I don't think so."

"Well then, happy seventeenth birthday James." She whispered, her voice fading just like the rest of her as she looked into his warm brown eyes.

When he didn't say anything or make a move to pull away she did something she never would have expected of herself. She leaned forward, closed her eyes, and pressed her lips to his softly. It was an innocent and yet completely overwhelming kiss. When she pulled back she was aware that she was blushing, but she couldn't take it back now and truthfully she didn't want to. The butterflies in her stomach were doing a mad sort of dance and her skin felt hot and sensitive all over.

James' eyes were locked with hers and there was so much heat coming from them that she didn't know how she wasn't melting from his stare. His gaze was filling her with waves of desire so intense she didn't know if her senses could stand the onslaught.

"I…" he cleared his throat and went on, "I really hope that you'll do that again sometime." His voice was whisper soft and very smooth. He reached out and grabbed her hand entwining her fingers with his. "As far as birthdays are concerned I'm certain this is the best one I've ever had."

Lily didn't know what to say or do at that point so she just let him continue to run his fingers along hers, a movement more sensual than she thought it would be, and closed her eyes. She knew James was still looking at her but she didn't care.

She felt oddly safe tucked against the wall next to James, having just kissed him, his fingers running along her own, while he watched her fall helplessly into sleep.

**R&R Everybody...pretty pretty please?**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: As usual it's not my idea, J.K. Rowling is the mastermind behind it all.**

**Author's Note: To everyone who reads this story and enjoys it I am very sorry for the long long delay in getting it updated. I've had a lot of things I've been dealing with this summer and I haven't had the time to really go through and edit and such the way I wanted to and I'm not the sort of writer who can just put out things I really haven't gone over for you all to read. So as sorry as I am for taking so long to update I am also happy that I didn't give you something that wasn't worth reading :)**

**To everyone who reviewed and who has been waiting so patiently thankyou :) I really appreciate all of your feedback and enthusiasm over this story! It really makes me happy to know you all are enjoying my version of what happened between Lily and James as much as I am. **

**To **The DA is dressed to the nines** Thanks so much for being so understanding and supportive. I'm really glad you've been reading and keeping up with this story and I really love all the feedback you've given me :) And thanks for the message it was really nice of you!**

**Well here goes chapter 13 sorry about the length but this was really where the chapters needed to be divided up. Hopefully you all enjoy it and don't worry more Lily and James romance is just around the corner!**

**Chapter 13**

**Goodbyes of a Different Sort**

Lily and James by some odd sort of mutual agreement didn't talk about the kiss they shared on James' birthday, in much the same way that they didn't talk about the one they'd shared outside the Leaky Cauldron. They carried on as they had before spending time with their now mutual friends and with each other.

Oddly enough right before term ended Lily found herself having a rather serious discussion with none other than Sirius Black.

"So I'm not sure I'm following here Evans. You're telling me that the most intelligent witch in Hogwarts, destined to be Head Girl, Lily Evans has no clue what she wants to do once we are out of here?"

Lily looked down at where his head was resting in her lap and she shrugged.

"It's odd I know but with the war and all I've been having a really hard time making plans for the future."

Sirius sat up and resituated himself so that his back was against the trunk of the Elm tree they were sitting under.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He asked worriedly. "Like you aren't sure you have a future or something?"

Lily shook her head. "It's nothing like that. I'm just not sure what I want to do when so much is going on in the wizarding world right now. I mean I've thought of being a Medi-witch or an Auror, something useful you know. Maybe that way I'll feel like I have a purpose in the war. Then again I'm not sure at all if that is the path I want to take. I've also thought of becoming an Unspeakable or working for the Ministry in some other way. I just…don't know."

Sirius nodded in understanding. "I get that. It's tough times that we live in right now and I suppose everyone is entitled to a little confusion as far as the future is concerned."

Lily grinned and leaned her shoulder into his. "And what about you? What does Sirius Black want to be?"

"It's probably stupid but I want to be an Auror." He answered somewhat shyly.

"You mean like James' dad?"

Sirius glanced at her in wonder. "Man you are too sharp sometimes Evans…Yeah, exactly like James' dad. He's one of the best wizards I've ever known and he's always been there you know. I don't know how much James has told you but I pretty much moved in with his family this summer. His mum and dad didn't even question it, just took me in like it was no big deal and have treated me just like they treat James ever since. Like they've always had two sons instead of one."

Lily waited while he gathered his thoughts. He ran a hand through his dark hair and his striking grey eyes looked out over the Hogwarts grounds.

"I don't know if I've ever met anyone as good as the Potters and if in some small way I can be a little like James' dad…or hell even like James himself, then I guess that kind of helps to counteract my awful parentage and familial connections."

Lily reached over and grabbed his hand. "You know you don't have to keep trying to prove you aren't like them. We know that. Everyone does. We can see it when we look at you, spend time with you. Take now for example. If you were anything like your family you wouldn't want me within feet of you much less touching you. You'd think I would contaminate you with my muggleborn filth."

"There's nothing wrong with you. And if anyone is filthy it's them. I'm sorry that they think the way they do." He said squeezing her hand gently and shaking his head at his family's absurdity.

"See what I mean? You aren't like them Sirius. I'm the last person you'd need to try and prove that to. And I understand completely why you would want to be like James' dad. It's just…I don't want you to be like him because you want to separate yourself from your family in some way. Be like him because that's what _you _want."

Sirius nodded and placed his arm around her shoulders, tucking her into his side.

"You know Lily-Flower you're a pretty smart witch."

"Thankyou." She replied letting her head fall and rest on his shoulder.

"But for being so smart it's taking you way too long to realize that you belong with my best friend." He added.

Lily stiffened but didn't pull away. "It's just…I need a little time is all."

She felt Sirius tense slightly in reaction to her stiffness before he questioned, "You mean you're starting to like James?"

"I've sort of liked him for awhile." She replied closing her eyes against the explosion that she knew was coming.

"WHAT! Merlin, that's great! Go tell him!" Sirius chortled yanking her tighter against his chest and shaking her happily.

"No." She said laughing at his enthusiasm. "I can't yet. I have to…give it some time. I need to sort some things out."

"Like what?"

"Like my thoughts and feelings. I need to let things happen a little more slowly. I'm not like James. I can't just go running headlong into something without considering the consequences. I have to know that it's the right thing." She explained.

Sirius laughed loudly. "Oh Evans, can't you see you're just prolonging the inevitable. One of these days you and him are going to be together and when that day comes you are going to look back and think to yourself, why didn't I date him sooner." He let his head fall back against the tree and he closed his eyes in relaxation.

"That may be so, but right now I can only do things my way. And while I like him…sometimes more than I think I should…I have to let it play out slowly." She informed him, before adding. "And don't you dare go and tell him how I feel. If you do so help me I'll charm Peter to follow you around singing 'God Save the Queen' for a month."

"I won't tell him. It's too much fun watching you two stumble around the big elephant that's between you."

Lily frowned. "You mean that we like each other?"

"No I mean that you love each other."

She stiffened instantly and made to pull away from him but found she couldn't, he was holding her in place against his chest. She looked at him worriedly.

"Don't have a panic attack Lily. I'm only telling you what I think. It's not the end of the world and the sky isn't falling and Prongs isn't going to appear suddenly and propos…"

"Hey." A voice called out and Lily looked up startled to see James standing in front of her.

Sirius began to chuckle madly as Lily flushed crimson.

"Hey Prongs. Are you here to propose?"

Lily shoved against Sirius' chest but he refused to let her go.

"Because," he went on impishly, "if you are I don't think you are going to get the answer you want. Lily-Flower and I have bonded. So much so in fact that I think we are going to elope. We were thinking honeymoon in Italy. Isn't that right love?"

Lily couldn't help but burst out laughing and to her surprise James just grinned at them both.

"Well I'm glad to know that Lily's taken with you. I hope you two are wonderfully happy together and have a dozen horrid children."

Sirius gasped at James' words and grabbed Lily by the shoulders with both of his hands.

"Can we name the first one Alphard? I've always liked my Uncle Alphard!" He asked smiling like a lunatic.

"Absolutely not," Lily chuckled going along with their silliness, "because the first one will be a girl."

Sirius scrunched his face into a mock frown. "You know what Evans I don't think this is going to work out after all. I mean what the hell would I name a girl?"

Lily cackled madly and said, "We could always name her Bella after your favorite cous…"

Sirius began to tickle her and Lily fell back into the grass laughing uncontrollably.

"You know I think Petunia is a nice name, don't you James? We could name the ickle girly after her auntie."

Lily snorted and said through her laughter, "Merlin… no."

Sirius continued to tickle her grinning from ear to ear. "I think so…I mean unless you want to name her Walburga after my bitch of a mother, oooh wouldn't that piss of the old bat."

As she fought to take in air between her giggles Lily reached out to James and said dramatically through tears of mirth,

"Please, save me….I…just…c..can't have…a kid named…Wa..Wa..Walburga."

"Well in that case." James said launching himself at Sirius.

Lily watched as the two of them wrestled in the grass and she couldn't keep the smile off of her face as she caught her breath.

She grinned wider as she realized that despite all that was going on in the world it was nice to just act ridiculously silly sometimes.

The last few months of school flew by in a blur of final exams and papers and before they knew it the students were back on the train and headed home for the summer.

"Ugh thank Merlin we are headed home." Marlene muttered irriatably. "If I had to look at another inch of parchment or study one more thing pertaining to potions I would literally vomit."

"Well we all know Alice isn't happy." Dorcas put in grinning. "She is completely smitten with Frank and she's been moaning to everyone for the past two months that she can't believe that he won't be around next year."

Lily sighed and leaned her head back against the wall of the compartment, under the window. "You don't know the half of it. As her best friend I've literally had to hear over and over and over again every detail of their relationship and how much she is going to miss all the _sweet_ things he does for her…and to her."

"Well at least they'll have the summer together. Though I don't envy her going to meet Frank's mother." Marlene put in. "That woman is downright scary."

James nodded his agreement. "When I was little I used to hide whenever she came over to the house."

"Well I for one can't believe how fast the last days of school went. I mean it feels like it was April last week." Dorcas said glumly. "I hope summer doesn't go by the same way. I could use a _real_ break."

"Speaking of summer," James began looking at Sirius, "Padfoot's birthday is the end of June, a few weeks from now and we were thinking of having everybody over to celebrate."

"Don't let him fool you his parents want to do a joint thing because they didn't get to be there for his seventeenth birthday. So it's technically for both of us, but you don't have to buy Prongs any more gifts. Only me." Sirius put in devilishly.

"Sounds like fun." Marlene answered smiling. "I'm sure my mum will be pleased to hear I'm spending time with James again."

"She still carrying on about how we'd make a good couple?" James chuckled.

"Of course, despite the fact that the last time she saw you was at my eleventh birthday party."

"How come your mum hasn't been coming to any of the Ministry events?" James asked curiously. "I mean we've seen your dad around a ton as he works with mine but your mum's been missing."

"Well what with the brood and all she's been home quite a lot these past few years. I've of course been roped into helping her; hence my not being at any of the usual parties over the years either. With all the little ones it is always tough to find someone to watch them and now with the war going on and all, my mum doesn't really want the kids to be overly visible so she stays home with them."

James nodded and let the topic drop.

"So I take it if we invite you guys you all will come?" Sirius said grinning madly as everyone nodded.

Lily sighed. "I'm not sure what I'll be able to do this summer. It's hard for me to nail down anything definite what with my dad scheduling last minute 'family time' and insisting we all go to the beach and what not. And on top of that my sister is probably going to be bringing her boyfriend around again. My mum likes to says he's 'interesting' which is code for she doesn't like him and as I've said I think my dad would like to shoot him, but mum says that we are going to have him over for dinner again sometime soon, which means that we'll have to hide all evidence that I'm a witch and I'll have to pretend I go to a regular school and that I'm perfectly _normal_."

"Well we'll send you the invitation and if your parents say no, Prongs and I will just have to make a house call." Sirius insisted.

James nodded at his words. "You need to come Lily. I won't have any fun if you don't."

Lily laughed at his pathetic tone. "Oh really? I find that rather hard to believe."

"The sad thing is it's probably true." Remus put in lightly. "If you can't come he'll probably just mope around all day."

James was nodding along enthusiastically as Remus spoke.

"Yup I'll mope and pout and drive everyone crazy so either your parents say yes or Sirius and I will have to make a midnight rescue." He put in firmly.

Lily grinned and leaned her head against his knee. "Alright James, I'll come."

"Perfect," Sirius cackled, "now we will all be there."

The rest of the train ride passed too quickly for the sixth years, who were enjoying their time together. As the train rolled to a stop James helped Lily to stand and they followed their friends out and onto the platform.

Lily tried to ignore the somewhat nervous feeling she was getting at having to leave her friends for the summer. She stuck close to James as they collected their belongings and moved through the masses of departing students. When she got jostled one time too many he grabbed a hold of her hand and began to guide her through the crowd. Her stomach fluttered strangely at the protective gesture and she had to remind herself to breathe.

It was like that when she was with James. She could spend hours with him and start to think she had only been imagining her attraction to him. Then out of nowhere a single look or gesture or touch would send her senses into chaos. She couldn't understand her own reactions to him and she couldn't keep herself from imagining how things would be if she allowed herself to actually go out with him.

Would he continue to like her as much as he did now? Or would he realize that she wasn't as wonderful as he had built up in his head? Would he still see the Lily that he always wanted? Or would she be somewhat lacking in the girlfriend department?

Lily sighed in frustration and James turned to look at her.

"We'll be through in a second." He told her misconstruing the sound for one of impatience.

A moment later they had reached the end of the huge crowd of students.

"There you are kiddo." A voice called out. "Where've you been? Sirius got here a while ago."

James moved toward his dad still unconsciously holding Lily's hand.

"Ahh now it makes sense." Sirius chuckled when he saw Lily being towed along. "I guess we can forgive your tardiness."  
James flushed and Lily frowned at his tone.

"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Potter it's nice to see you again." She said pleasantly, smiling as they responded, before adding, "I'd love to say and catch up but I need to go through the barrier. My parents are waiting on the other side." She turned to James, standing awkwardly in front of him, once again feeling nervous at having to leave.

"I'll walk you." He offered.

"That's alright. I know you'll want to catch up and I'm sure I'll find them just fine on my own." She answered quickly before the idea could really take hold in his mind.

"Are you sure because I don't…"

"No really it's fine. You go ahead and catch up with your parents. I'll see you later."

James nodded shoving his hands into his pockets as if to keep himself from reaching for her. Lily smiled at the move and stepped up in front of him.

"So I don't get a hug then?" She said softly.

He grinned crookedly and nodded. "Of course you do."

Once he wrapped his arms around her Lily realized her mistake. They were in front of his family and she shouldn't have suggested anything that would look so intimate. Especially when she began to react to his closeness.

With his arms wrapped around her his smell in her nose, she couldn't keep herself from leaning into his embrace and hugging him back fiercely. It was a struggle for her to pull away and smile as if her pulse hadn't just jumped into overdrive.

"Can you do me a favor?" She said suddenly surprising herself. "Just write to me like you did last summer. Tell me everything. Whatever comes to mind or whatever you're doing that day. Just tell me all of it."

"I will." He said seriously. "I promise."

"I'll see you around then?"

He just nodded, his eyes dark and far away. She knew his thoughts were just as muddled as her own in that instant. So she just nodded in return and turned away rushing to collect her things and meet up with her parents. She didn't want to have to say a real goodbye.

**Hope you liked it! R&R please**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: It all belongs to JKR**

**Authors Note: I know this chapter isn't full of romance or action but I promise that is coming up in the next few chapters. This one is sort of important for setting up what is coming later on and for giving you a sense of where Lily's mindset might be in regard to learning just how influential and rich the Potter's really are. I sort of went with the whole Potter=Lots of wealth idea and later on I'll fill in the gaps as to how Lily and James ended up in Godric's Hollow without either of their parents. As I said I know this chapter is more of a filler but I pinky promise that you are going to get more romance than you probably want pretty soon. **

**But until then I hope you enjoy this chapter and that, as always, you let me know if you have any questions, commments or concerns in regard to this story.**

**Thankyou so much to everyone who took the time to review! It really means a lot and I truly love hearing what you all think :) so Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou! And keep it up!**

**Chapter 14**

**Summertime and Sickness**

_My Lily,_

_What is this now? The 20__th__ letter I've written you this summer? More that that even…Geez time flies huh? How did the dinner with Petunia's boyfriend go? Hopefully you didn't feel too awkward during it._

_Since you asked I guess I have to tell you my parents are doing fine. They are being as ridiculously mushy and over the top all over each other as ever so I'm assuming they are just wonderful. I swear if I find them in the hall closet one more time though I'm going to die of mortification. Sirius thinks it's funny and he even tries to embarrass them by bringing it up but it never works. My mum just blushes and my dad finds some excuse to whisk her away somewhere and…well let's just say I'm amazed I don't have a younger sibling with all the "alone" time they spend together. _

_They ask about you a lot. They want to know how you are doing and if your summer is going well. I tell them you are doing great and that you are having fun spending time with your family. I hate that they ask about you though. It just makes me think about you more and I have a hard enough time getting you out of my head to begin with._

_I know you probably hate it when I do this but sometimes I just can't help myself…I miss you. Like you would not believe. I thought summers were hard before when I was just pitifully pining for you all the time but now that we are friends it is even worse. I think of things to tell you and I have to wait until I'm writing you to do it. Or I want to show you something and I can't. Mostly I just want to see you though. I miss hanging out with you. Reading by the lake. Fridays in the library. I'm ashamed to admit I miss being at school because it means I'm in close proximity to you. _

_Pathetic right?_

_Anyway today I spent the day with Sirius and Remus in the local wizarding village. It was a lot of fun. We ran into a few friends of ours from school and Sirius invited them to his birthday bash this weekend. That was when I realized it is only a matter of days before I get to see you. I can't wait. It will be great to finally have you over. And for the whole weekend too. When we told my dad who all was coming he said he might have to hide out in his office once Marlene gets here. Sirius told him he thought that was a pretty good idea. Me and my mum just laughed. _

_I was also just curious as to how you are getting here. My dad and I can come get you if you need us to. Truly. It is absolutely no trouble at all and I don't mind and I'm not busy and my dad isn't either and whatever other excuses you think of can just be checked off the list too. I just know from Alice that your house isn't connected to the floo network and our house has anti-apparation wards and I don't want you apparating onto the end of the street and having to walk here. So seriously if you need us to get you just say the word. _

_I'm rambling again I know. It's hard not to when I don't get to see you on a regular basis. _

_I guess I'll see you in a few days!_

_I miss you and I hope you are still having a good summer._

_Love,_

_James_

Lily smiled when she finished reading his letter. So far James' letters had been just what she needed that summer. They were a window into his life and Lily loved that he never left anything out and told her whatever came to his mind as he wrote. She had caught herself more than once looking out her window for his owl in anticipation for the next one.

She sighed as she went up the stairs to write him back. She only wished she had the same ability to just tell him what she was thinking without feeling so self-conscious. So far she'd only been able to tell him about what she had been up to and to ask him questions about his summer. She couldn't bring herself to write about any of the things that were bothering her. Or about how she was now almost ridiculously certain that she had fallen for him.

Chastising herself for her timidity she put the quill to the parchment and was about to write her normal beginning but something stopped her. Acting on impulse she wrote things out a little differently than was usual. She was surprised at herself when she was finished. It had felt better than she would have thought to put a little more of herself in without worry as to what he would think or how he would react.

Before she could second guess the action she rushed down the stairs and sent it off with James' owl. Her heart hammered in worry over how he would take it all.

James sat at the dinner table laughing as his father told a story about how one of his fellow aurors managed to find himself in the middle of a squabble between two elderly witches and had to charm his way out of it.

"I swear I thought old Mrs. Brown was going to kiss him before he was done." Jason chortled.

"Well at least he managed to settle it without the two old crones hexing each other into oblivion." Charlottle added smiling over the incident.

Just then the family owl appeared and hooted happily for them to retrieve their mail. James reached forward but Sirius beat him to it grabbing the letters and rifling through them.

"Hmmm let's see. We have two for your dad. One for both your parents. I've got one from Moony and well, well, well it seems Prongs got one from a certain redhead we all know and love." Sirius chortled holding the letter out of reach as James lunged across the table for it.

"Not so fast Prongs. Let's see what she has to say." Sirius said ripping open the letter and smoothing it out.

James sighed in irritation trying to reach for it again.

Sirius just laughed and danced out of his chair and out of reach. As he tried to begin reading the letter James chased after him. As they passed by Jason, Sirius realized that the letter he'd been holding only a moment before was now in the hands of James' dad.

Sirius sighed and sat down mumbling about 'fun-suckers' as Jason handed the letter over to James, who looked it over eagerly.

_My James,_

_I don't know how you always manage to tell me so much about what you are thinking and feeling, when I can't seem to get anything across the way I want to. I've been meaning to tell you a lot of things for a while now and I just haven't been able to put quill to parchment and get it out. But I'm going to make an attempt to be better, hopefully._

_I've been dreaming terrible things lately. Things I don't really even understand. Things about Death Eaters and Voldemort. I don't know what it all means but it terrifies me none the less. After waking my mum up a few times with my screaming I learned to put a silencing charm up before I go to bed. It's ridiculous that I'm letting it get to me the way I am but I now dread going to sleep most nights. _

_I feel silly being afraid of my nightmares but I can't help but wonder why I'm having them at all. Maybe I'm more frightened than I thought about what could happen to me or to my family once I leave the safety of Hogwarts next year. _

_I think my fears also have a lot to do with the idea of all of us going our separate ways in life. I find myself hating the idea of seventh year and graduation (things I've looked forward to for a long while now) because of the changes that they are going to bring with them. _

_Since you asked I suppose I have to tell you that the dinner with my sister's boyfriend went horribly. You see Petunia apparently caught some sort of flu or something and right in the middle of dinner she had to dash off to the loo. She's been getting sick constantly for two days now and of course she thinks I have something to do with it. She believes I must have done something to make her ill in order to embarrass her in front of Vernon. Ridiculous right? _

_To his credit Vernon merely excused himself from what had been an extraordinarily tense dinner and left once Petunia was out of sight. I really think my dad still wants to shoot him despite Petunia's growing affection for him. I'll admit I also really wanted to hex him a couple of times while we were eating. _

_I really can't believe we've been out of school for nearly a month already. Time really flies sometimes and I don't know if I like it just passing me by without notice. _

_I've been thinking of you a lot too. It's good to know you've been doing the same. I've missed you terribly these past few weeks and I'm beginning to find myself looking out the window hoping that your owl will suddenly appear. I know it sounds silly but I'm starting to feel like I've known the real you for quite a long time now and not just one simple year. You've sort of wiggled your way under my skin and into my life and….I'm glad._

_I can't believe it will only be a few days before the party. And don't worry about coming to get me, I'm flooing over to your place with Alice from her house, we'll be there around eleven or so. It will be really great to see you. _

_Just know that until then I'm thinking of you._

_Love,_

_Your Lily_

James grinned as he finished her letter. Just a few more days.

"Merlin James would you stop pacing? It's driving me insane!" Sirius snapped.

James didn't hear him, he was too focused on the fireplace. Pretty soon Lily would be stepping out of the flames and he didn't know how anything was going to go after that.

Suddenly the flames turned green and he straightened in anticipation.

He tried not to look too disappointed when Marlene and Dorcas appeared instead of Lily. He greeted them happily and was glad when they all wanted to wait for everybody else to arrive before they went out to the pool.

A half hour later James was beyond nervous. Remus had come. Frank and Gideon had shown up along with the rest of the Gryffindor quidditch team. So had Celeste Johnson and Rhona Marks, two Ravenclaw friends of theirs. Peter had arrived, followed by more friends from other houses and from Gryffindor. Then came Fabian Prewitt, Gideon's brother.

By the time they were all gathered about James felt like he was going to shred something. He rubbed his face in agitation as the flames turned green once again and….

Lily wobbled out.

"Oh thank Merlin." He heard Dorcas call out. "I thought he was going to hex something."

The redhead dusted herself off and looked about at everyone with a small smile on her face.

James sat stunned. He'd forgotten just what looking at her did to his insides. His stomach was in knots and he felt like his chest was burning and clawing at him. He knew his palms were probably already sweating like crazy.

She looked beautiful. She was wearing a cream colored dress with little blue flowers all over it and her hair was down and curled. She looked a little pale to him but he knew she hadn't been sleeping well. She truly was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. If he died right then he'd have died happy.

She caught sight of him and grinned happily then suddenly her smile faded. James walked toward her unaware of her sudden change in disposition.

"I'm so glad you're here." He said sincerely reaching for her to pull her into a hug.

"James I…" She began shakily putting her hand up to stop him from grabbing her.

"Lily? What's wrong?" He said standing in front of her and noticing for the first time the light sheen of sweat that covered her brow.

"I…" She attempted swallowing thickly.

James waited worriedly for her to speak but instead of words coming out of Lily's mouth a moment later she threw up all over his shoes.

"Oh sweet Merlin, that's disgusting!" Sirius yelped hopping a couch and moving as far away from the pair of them as he could.

James reacted as quickly as possible by grabbing up Lily's hair and holding it in his left hand to keep it away from her face. With his other hand he did his best to help keep her upright.

"Aw Lils…" He said compassionately.

She made a rough coughing noise and was able to choke out a broken, "I'm s…orry James."

"Don't be. You can't help getting sick." He consoled as she continued to vomit all over his feet.

He noticed absently that half the party attendants had left the room already and that more were making their way toward the door to escape Lily's being ill.

He looked over and found Dorcas bravely standing by with Remus.

"Is there anything I can get for her James?" Dorcas questioned looking at Lily sympathetically.

"Ya if you wouldn't mind going and getting my mum…." He trailed off as Lily made a strangled sound of protest. "Don't be silly Lily she isn't going to care that your sick. Though this is her favorite rug." James teased.

Lily groaned and James chuckled, reaching down to sweep up a tendril of her hair that had come loose.

As Dorcas left the room to fetch his mother the fireplace lit up and Alice stepped out. She ran to Frank, greeting him warmly before turning to James.

"Sorry about her. I tried to tell her to just stay home but she wouldn't hear of it. She looked green from the moment I saw her this morning but she kept insisting she was fine. I knew travelling by floo would send her over the edge." Alice provided.

Lily made a sputtering sound and Alice huffed.

"Oh please Lily you know it was foolish to come here. Just admit that I was right and that you should have just sent James an owl and told him how you were feeling," Alice chastised.

A small moaning noise was Lily's only reply. Alice rolled her eyes and dragged Frank from the room.

"Oh dear…"

James turned his head at the sound of his mother's voice in the doorway.

"Her sister's been sick with the flue lately. I think maybe Lily picked up whatever she had." He explained.

Charlotte nodded and left to fetch a potion to settle Lily's stomach while James continued to let Lily use him for support.

They were still in that position, Lily's head against James' thighs, her hands gripping his hamstrings while James held her hair and rubbed her back, when his mother and father reappeared.

"When she feels alright to stand up we'll see if she can manage to swallow some of this," His mum held up the small vial of liquid, "it should settle her stomach right away but it will make her rather tired I'm afraid."

Jason moved to sit down on the nearest sofa and chuckled, "Look Char. It's all over your favorite rug."

Lily groaned again, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and managed to use James to shakily hoist herself into a standing position.

"Mrs. Potter I'm so sorry." She managed weakly. "I should have listened to Alice and stayed home."

James uncaring of the sick that still covered his feet picked Lily up before she could protest as his mother reassured her that she didn't blame Lily in the slightest.

"I've always hated that old rug anyway." She supplied, which made James and Jason chuckle lightly.

James' parents followed along as he carted Lily to a nearby guest bedroom and laid her down on the bed. After letting his mother give her a dose of a tart tasting potion she turned to James and apologized again.

"I'm so sorry." She said softly. "I'm so embarrassed. I…"

He shook his head at her and moved to stand next to her.

"I'm glad you're here okay?" He said firmly grabbing her hand. "I'm sorry that you're sick and I hope that you feel better soon but I'm not sorry that you came."

She smiled softly and allowed herself to let the potion pull her into sleep.

Lily woke to the sound of a door opening and closing. She rubbed her eyes tiredly and tried to focus on the figure moving toward her bed.

James was carrying a large tray filled to the brim with what looked like a wide variety of breakfast foods.

"Good morning sunshine." He called out grinning. "My mum sent this up to you. She said she was sure you'd be starving by now as you've slept nearly a whole twenty-four hours."

Lily groaned and sat up to lean back against the headboard.

"My parents are probably going to kill me." She muttered.

"That's all been taken care of. My dad made a trip over there to let them know what happened and he assured them it would be no trouble at all for you to just spend the night here. Marlene and Dorcas did as well. I'm sure Alice would have also but I think she was wanting to get as much time in with Frank as possible." James explained placing the tray on the bedside table.

He stood awkwardly by her bed for a moment before asking, "So how are you feeling today?"

"Better." She replied honestly. "Still a little queasy and groggy but mostly back to normal."

There was a moment of intense silence in which James found himself the sudden object of Lily's scrutiny. He shuffled his feet a bit and ran a hand through his already messy hair, feeling awkward.

"What is it?" He asked shyly.

She smiled. "I just wouldn't have thought you'd look so dashing in your pajamas is all."

To Lily's surprise James blushed furiously red just as the door swung open again. Sirius, Charlotte and Jason entered with Marlene and Dorcas poking their heads in from the doorway.

"Good morning Lily-flower. How is my future-wife feeling this morning?" Sirius called out bounding over to the bed and landing on it with such force that it sent Lily a few inches into the air.

"Padfoot!" James scolded. "Don't bounce her around."

"Why not? Will she throw up on me? She seems better toda…why are you all red? Merlin, are you blushing?" Sirius said wide-eyed.

"No." James said turning away from him.

"You are!" Sirius cackled. "What happened? Did you say something stupid? Did you fall over and make an ass of yourself trying to bring her breakfast in?"

Sirius continued to pester James until Lily broke in. "Stop it Sirius it was my fault alright."

He turned to her with interest then. "And what may I ask did you do to make my handsome friend match your hair?"

Lily grinned and said, "I complimented him."

"That would do it." Sirius chuckled and then laughed harder as Lily's stomach growled ridiculously loudly.

"I knew you would be hungry." Mrs. Potter said unceremoniously shoving Sirius out of the way to sit next to Lily on her bed. "We just wanted to let you know that you are welcome to stay until you are feeling one hundred percent better. In fact we insist you stay here until you've fully recuperated".

"Thankyou, I really appreciate you being so nice and your potion is working wonders I'm sure I'll feel better in no time." Lily responded honestly.

"That reminds me." Charlotte said turning to Jason and taking a small potion vial that he handed her. "This is a milder form of the potion you took yesterday. It won't make you tired but it would be best if we kept it all in your system until your back to normal. I would take it after you share breakfast with this lot."

As James parents made to leave Lily's friends began to pile onto her bed to share her breakfast with her.

"I'm really sorry about your rug Mrs. Potter." She called out before James' mum could disappear.

Charlotte turned and smiled. "It's no problem at all dear. _Scourigify_ works wonders."

After breakfast Marlene convinced Lily that she needed to take the grand tour of James' house as she had only seen the living room, a bedroom and a hallway. After donning clothes borrowed from Dorcas, Lily followed the rest of the group out of her room.

Ten minutes later Lily was frowning.

"You didn't tell me you lived in a mansion." She said huffily.

"It's not really a mansion." James protested.  
"It is compared to where I live."

"I like your house."

Lily made a choking noise of disbelief and turned to look at the huge staircase that took up more space that her living room at home again.

"This is a bloody mansion James Potter." She growled and then covered her face with her hands. "I can't believe I let you see my house when you live here."

"Don't be melodramatic Lily. It's not like you live in squalor or something." Marlene said chidingly.

Lily sighed. "Close enough compared to this."

"Stop. It's not like we bought it or anything. It's been in my family for a really long time. Since like my triple or quadruple times great grandfather or something." James provided trying to be helpful.

She sucked in her breath and turned to look at him.

"In muggle culture I think you would probably be considered royalty or something." She said crossing her arms over her chest.

"Lily stop. It's not like it's that much bigger than my house." Marlene added.

"It is too. Your house is huge and this house could eat it three times and still want a snack." Lily retorted.

She looked at the huge staircase again and groaned. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Not for real right?" Sirius questioned worriedly as he tried to hide behind Dorcas.

James sighed and grabbed her wrist to tug her toward the kitchen.

"I'm sorry if you don't like the house." He supplied as their friends chatted around them.

Lily stopped and looked up at him in shock.

"What are you on about? I love it."

James looked at her in like she'd sprouted antlers. "You just spent five minutes groaning about how I live in a bloody mansion."

"So? That doesn't mean I don't like it. I feel rather like Elizabeth Bennet actually." Lily admitted blushing and rushing on ahead of him.

Marlene looked at a grinning James in bewilderment before running after Lily to tell her she'd gone the wrong way.

Lily was reeling. She had known James' family were prominent purebloods and that they had a lot of money but she'd never imagined anything close to what she was exoeriencing now. The whole idea of it left her feeling rather self-concsious and worried. She hadn't truly realized that there was such a huge disparity between them, that in a sense he really was way out of her league.

She looked around her and sighed. Their kitchen was monstrous. There was no other word for it. There were cupboards upon cupboards and an island that was nearly the size of her double bed. James directed her to sit in one of the bar stools and she complied.

"So what do you want to drink? Water, Orange juice, tea, pumpkin juice, we might have some muggle drinks in here I told Tolly to get some…a ha!" He appeared triumphant as he produced a coke from the cupboards he was rummaging in and Lily grinned at his excitement.

"Coke is fine." She replied, taking it from him after he placed a cooling spell on it.

James leaned against the counter as she opened it and waited until she took a drink to say, "So how have you been? I mean since before you got here."

She shrugged. "Alright. I'm still not sleeping well but I've been better these last two days. Honestly I've been trying to do what you said and just stay positive and it's been helping."

"That's good. I'm sorry if I wasn't as much help as you thought I'd be I…"

"No." Lily interrupted. "You were great. Thanks I…"

She trailed off and looked out the big kitchen windows to where her friends had all gone outside to lounge by the pool.

"It was just a little overwhelming for awhile is all. I mean I've never been prone to nightmares before."

James nodded in understanding and Lily turned her attention to her Coke.

Looking at James was more than a little overwhelming for her. If possible he'd gotten even more handsome than the last time she saw him. He was even more tan than usual and his hair was as sexily messy as ever. And he looked as if he'd gotten taller and as if he'd put on more muscle in just the weeks since she'd last seen him, but his eyes were as golden brown and intense as she remembered.

She knew they were on her as she looked back out the window again.

"Can I ask you something?" She quipped, still not looking at him.

"Go ahead."

"Do you mind if we don't swim today? I mean I know that's what everyone else is going to do and probably what you want to do and I'm fine if you do swim I just….really want to take a nap." She admitted smiling shyly.

James grinned and made his way over to her.

"I'll make you a deal." He said putting his hand out. "You let me try some of that," he pointed to her can of Coke, "and we'll go out to the hammock and you can take a nap while I watch the goings on at the pool. Is it a deal?"

Lily reached out and took his hand and shook it.

"You've got yourself a deal James Potter." She said impishly handing him the can of Coke and adding. "Be careful you might not like it."

James quirked an eyebrow at her and lifted the can to his lips. Lily watched as he took a huge gulp and ended up sputtering and coughing.

She whacked him on the back a few times as he choked.

"Are you okay?" She breathed worriedly. "Did it go down the wrong pipe or something?"

James shook his head and stood up as straight as he could to take a deep breath. His eyes were wide with shock and he sounded hoarse as he replied.

"It was like…fizzy or something."

Lily began to laugh. Softly at first and then more forcefully. Soon she was sitting on the tile and leaning back against his cupboards as she convulsed in mirth, with James looking on in puzzlement.

"Hey kiddo, what's with your girlfriend?" Jason Potter appeared suddenly his wife at his side.

"She's not my girlfriend." James stated plainly. "And I have no idea. All I did was try her drink and ended up coughing from it because it's all weird and fizzy and…"

His eyes shot to Lily as she began another round of laughter at his words. She fell over until she was lying on the tile and cackling like mad.

"That's it Evans. You're gonna get it." He said moving toward her in a mock menacing way.

Lily sat up and held her hand out. "No. Wait. I'm sorry. I…." She cleared her throat and wiped her eyes. "I didn't mean to laugh…" She paused took a few deep breaths and bit her lip for a second. "I didn't mean to laugh at you so much. It's just that's how it's supposed to be."  
She stood up and grabbed the Coke off the counter and handed it to him.

James looked at her in disbelief.

"So it's supposed to be that fizzy?"

Lily nodded, "This stuff is carbonated. The fizzyness is just a part of it. Try it again and take a smaller drink this time. It's actually good I promise."

Still looking wary James lifted the drink to his lips and took a much smaller swallow. Lily watched as he processed the whole experience and tried not to laugh again.

"See it's not so bad. You just have to get used to the whole fizzy thing."

James nodded. "I don't know if I really like it, but I could probably get used to it."

"Is that the stuff you asked Tolly to get?" His dad questioned moving to look for it.

"Yea I figured we'd try it. Especially since Lily was gonna be here." He replied fighting and failing to hide his blush.

Lily bit her lip to hide her smile but she failed as well.

"Come on Potter. Bring that Coke. A deal's a deal."

James grinned and followed her willingly toward the door.

He paused as he heard another can being popped open and he waited. Five seconds later his dad was coughing like mad and his mom was laughing hysterically.

It was good to know he wasn't the only one who made an idiot of himself sometimes.

**Hope you liked it! Review Please!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: It all belongs to JKR**

**Author's Note: **

**Thankyou to everyone who reviewed! You guys are great and I love hearing from you! All your encouragement and support just makes me want to write as fast as I can to keep you all happy :) **

**To **WisConSin-BloNde** I'm really glad you are enjoying the story! I haven't had time to look and see what Lily/James stories are out there that I really like but there are a few I'll try and find them for you soon! And as for you letting your readers know about this story that is fine with me as well, especially if they are as great of readers and reviewers as you say they are :)**

**For all of you out there waiting for more romance you are going to get some of it in this chapter and more of it than you can probably handle pretty soon as I get through the next few chapters. As I've stated before I know I'm off to a slow start but this story will most definately end up earning it's M rating later on. And in case anyone hasn't read it before I do post a short summary of what the next chapter will be about and the current title of it that is floating around it my head at the moment on my profile, so if you are the type that wants to know some of what is coming next feel free to have a look.**

**I'm really glad you are all still enjoying it so much...please keep the reviews coming I absolutely LOVE them! And I kinda need them for moral support ;)**

**Well here goes...**

**CHAPTER 15**

**Sweetness, Squabbles and Some Serious (& Sirius) Stuff**

After what Lily considered to be a fiasco at James' she felt somewhat awkward. She had slept the rest of the day away on the Potter's hammock with James sitting beside her, his back against the ancient looking tree that made up half the hammocks' support. She had dozed until suppertime in which she'd nearly fallen asleep in her mashed potatoes as James' father regaled her and her friends with interesting tales about being an Auror.

"Lil, snap out of it." Marlene chortled snapping her fingers under Lily's chin. "You look like you are about to start snoring."

"I don't snore." She bit back defensively.

"Keep telling yourself that." Marlene teased.

James' mother frowned at her. "The potion I gave you today shouldn't have made you so tired. I noticed you slept outside all day as well."

"I haven't been sleeping well at all lately." Lily supplied. "I'm sure my body is just trying to catch up."

Now it was Dorcas' turn to frown at her. "What do you mean you haven't been sleeping well? For as long as I've known you, you've pretty much slept like the dead."

"Well I'm sure with Petunia vomiting the night away outside your door, that it would be hard to get any sleep at all." James provided with a grin.

Lily shot him a grateful smile as her friends chuckled at the joke. She didn't know why she felt okay telling him that she'd been having the worst dreams of her entire life when she didn't even want to admit to her friends that anything was wrong at all.

After dinner they all gathered back in the living room, where Lily assured James' parents for the sixtieth time that she was indeed feeling better and that the trip through the floo to Alice's wouldn't be a problem.

"I promise if I don't feel well once I get there I'll just stay with Alice." She assured them.

James crossed his arms over his chest and frowned at her.

"I don't like it. You were sick as could be yesterday and you've been exhausted all day. I really wish you'd just agree to give it one more night here."

Lily smiled at him. "I appreciate your concern Potter but I promise you I'll make it home safe and sound. I'll be owling you before you know it."

James sighed in defeat still obviously displeased with her leaving. He hugged her briefly, too briefly, and then Lily was stepping into the flames and flooing to the Prewetts' house.

Over a month later Lily still wasn't sure what she thought about any of it. The way James had treated her while she was sick had been extremely sweet. He'd even sacrificed spending time with the others to help take care of her. She'd later even heard from Alice that he pretty much spent most of the day of the party at her bedside reading a novel in case she woke up and needed anything. Sirius had had to drag him to the kitchen when it was time for cake.

It was difficult for her to understand just what it was that made him so devoted to her. Sometimes the intensity of it all was a tad bit unnerving.

In the time since the party their owling had continued and Lily had done her best to be as honest as possible with James. She had told him more about the dreams she was having and about what she wanted from the future. Afterwards she had received a letter from James that sounded so filled with yearning that it made her heart-rate pick up.

_My Lily,_

_When you say things about life after Hogwarts and about having a family I find myself wishing I could jump forward in time to make sure I'm there with you. I know you wish I would rather not but I can't help saying that when I think of you, years from now, with children all about you I can only wish that I'm a part of that life. If my dreams were reality then I would be an even bigger part than you know. _

_I can't explain the way you make me feel sometimes. Like everything is spinning out of control but you and I are standing still. It's so hard for me to sit here and to be your friend when all I want to do is be more than that. _

_I'm sorry I know you don't want to hear that either. _

_There's just so much of you on my mind today that I'm having trouble focusing._

_I'll tell you all about what I've been up to in my next letter I guess. _

_If only you knew how much I miss you!_

_James_

After reading that letter she'd had to take a few minutes before she was able to breathe normally. He said so much in such few words. She wished she had the strength to admit to him that while she was fairly certain she wanted to give things a go with him, that she was also ridiculously afraid of giving him that chance.

Her old fears about not being everything he thought she was were still present and they clawed at her thoughts until she sometimes vowed she would never date James for fear of disappointing him. Yet, she somehow always came back to the realization that she wanted very badly to be more to him than a friend.

She was also still a bit daunted by the realization that there really was a rather large disparity between the two of them in social standing. She had always known the Potter name was big in the wizarding world but she hadn't realized that along with his impressive lineage he boasted a lot of wealth as well.

It had been obvious throughout school that James' things were always of good quality. That all his belongings were top of the line and that he could afford to buy his friends impressive gifts when he was so inclined. Yet, she'd always sort of pegged him as well off and not necessarily as the richer-than-Midas sort. It didn't help that she hadn't liked him enough before to really listen when the conversation shifted to talk of him or his friends or family.

Now that she knew just how wealthy he was she felt rather uneasy about his attention in a whole new way. Her family was lower middle class by definition. Her father worked while her mother stayed at home. She and Petunia had never lacked anything by any means but at the same time they'd also never been spoiled either. It was really the first time in her life that she had ever really considered herself to be somewhat not up to snuff.

While she and James continued to write and he continued to win her over, she also began to struggle internally with the idea of whether or not she was good enough for him.

"For Merlin's sake Evan's," She growled irritably to herself as she was getting dressed to head to Diagon Alley, "since when have you worried if you're good enough for a guy?"

But the thought had already taken hold and as much as she tried to shake it she couldn't. She was seriously starting to debate with herself why a guy like James was even giving her the time of day.

It hadn't helped either that in a couple of the other letters she had received from him he had mentioned that they had once again met up with some friends from school, Rhona Marks and Celeste Johnson, the two Ravenclaw girls that Lily never had the chance to meet due to being sick at the party were mentioned more than once. The thought of James spending time with other girls was a new source of frustration for her. Thinking about him having a good time with them had made her stomach and chest tighten up and she'd begun thinking of ways to hex the two girls until she had astonishingly realized that she was more than a little jealous.

As she made her way down the stairs to the breakfast table she could hear her mother and Petunia talking about the dinner party that her sister was going to attend that weekend. It was for Vernon's sister and had in fact been the source of their biggest row so far that summer.

Lily had come down the stairs the day before to find Petunia telling her mother that she needed her to take her shopping the next day. Rose Evans had inclined her head at Lily and informed Petunia that she was taking Lily shopping for school the next day.

"Mother I can't just show up in anything. I want to impress his family. I want them to like me. Why does Lily always come first?" Petunia whined pitifully.

"That's not what I said at all." Her mother admonished. "You know very well that I do my best to be as fair as possible between the two of you. I had already told Lily weeks ago that I would take her school shopping today so that she could work things out to meet up with her friends while we are there if she wished. I'm sorry but you will just have to wait until the day after."

"Can't she just meet up with her freakish friends and shop with them? I want to get this done tomorrow so that I won't be spending another day worrying about it. I've been panicking just since I learned of it yesterday. Please mum can't Lily just…_contact_ someone and go with them?" Petunia pleaded.

Lily opened her mouth to say that she was sure one of her friends wouldn't mind her company and that she could try to work things out with them when Petunia had screeched at her.

"Oh don't even try it Lily! For once just let mum make the decision on her own. You'll do whatever you can to get your way all the time and I'm tired of always having to change my plans to accommodate your freakishness."

Anger bubbled up in Lily and she unthinkingly shot back, "Just because you weren't lucky enough to be born a witch doesn't mean you should be allowed to treat me horribly all the time because I am one!"

Two spots of color appeared on her sisters' cheeks and Petunia's eyes went wide with shock and Lily instantly regretted her words.

"Look I…" She began to apologize.

"No! I don't know where you got the ridiculous notion that I would ever want to be anything like you but understand this," Petunia shouted, "I would never want to be like you! An abnormal, freakish, weirdo who doesn't fit in anywhere! You aren't really like them and you aren't really like us! You're just a whole different breed of strange! I like my _normal_ life and my mostly _normal _family and my _normal_ boyfriend…"

"Last I checked being the size of a small whale doesn't constitute normalcy!" Lily bit back hotly.

Petunia's words were striking too close to her own fears and insecurities at the moment and she couldn't keep the dread that what her sister was saying was true out of her mind. It made her prickly and angry and confused enough to want to get back at her sister for her cruelty. It didn't help that she'd been completely frustrated about James lately either.

"Now girls, that's enough!" Rose Evans interjected. "Both of you are behaving badly and I won't have it. You'll apologize to each other this instant or neither of you will be going anywhere tomorrow!"

There was a long silence as the heat of their argument still sizzled between them, before Lily sighed irritably, "I'm sorry Petunia, I didn't mean the things I said. Not really."

Before her sister could reply she turned to her mother and said flatly, "Just go to town with Petunia tomorrow. I'll meet up with one of my friends and shop with them."

She had disappeared back up the stairs before either her mother or her sister could say anything more and she hadn't spoken to either of them since then. She had owled Alice and had arranged to meet her near the owl emporium that morning.

Once she finished dressing she made her way down the stairs and called a farewell to her mother and sister before dashing out the door and heading toward the bus stop. She would catch the bus and then the train to take her into London.

Upon entering the Leaky Cauldron awhile later Lily smiled at the familiarity of the place. She waved to the barkeep and headed out the back. After opening the archway she stepped into Diagon Alley and was confronted with a whole different feel from the place than she'd had around Christmas. People weren't as chatty or as lively in general, most seemed to want to get their errands done as quickly as possible so that they could be on their way.

Lily wandered past the shops until she was almost to Eeylops Owl Emporium. Not spotting Alice anywhere she decided to grab an ice-cream while she waited. As she licked the mint chocolate-chip from her cone she watched as people towed their children along closely and how they smiled tightly at one another. While everything was as busy as ever and there was still a magical feel to the place, there was also an underlying current of fear that hung in the air and it made Lily feel oddly unsettled.

She kept a lookout for Alice while she finished her cone and people watched but she wasn't prepared when someone put their hands over her eyes and said teasingly, "Guess who?"

Lily laughed and shrugged, "Um I have no idea."

The hands disappeared and Lily turned to see Gideon Prewett standing behind her. She stood up and smiled warmly.

"How are you?"

He grinned and moved around the bench to hug her and then sit next to her. "Fine, I've been enjoying the summer and Auror training. How about yourself?"

"I'd forgotten you were going to be an Auror. That's great! I'm glad you're getting on well. Things are the same as always for me. Home in the Muggle-world for the summer, so naturally things have been rather slow and boring on occasion. My dad does his best to get us to do all manner of family things this time of year though so that's been a pleasant distraction."

Gideon nodded at her words. "I'm sure. It's good to see that you're feeling better as well. Last I saw of you you were making a right mess of Potter's shoes."

Lily flushed crimson and nodded, "I still can't believe I did that."

"It wasn't a pretty sight let me tell you." Gideon chuckled. "But in Potter's case I think he'd gladly sacrifice his shoes if it meant you were in close proximity to him."

Lily's blush spread further and Gideon laughed harder before inclining his head. "Speaking of James the prat is headed this way."

Before she had even turned her head to look Lily found herself being swept up into a set of strong arms, her head pressed against a solid chest that smelled so familiar she would know who it was by scent alone.

"James," She breathed, as her body seemed to both sag with relief and tingle all over at being near him again.

"Lil, I saw you from over there and I just…" he pulled back to look at her, his smile stretching across his face. "I missed you Lily."

She grinned back and squeezed him tighter, very aware of how closely pressed together they were.

"I missed you too. It's wonderful to see you."

A throat cleared behind them and Gideon stood to shake James' hand. Lily stepped away as the two guys greeted one another.

"So what brings you to Diagon Alley?" James asked Gideon still smiling.

"Just needed to pick up a few things here and there. I saw Lily sitting here by herself so I decided to visit with her for a minute and then you showed up."

Lily thought she detected the slightest flicker of change in James' eyes at Gideon's words but she couldn't be sure before he was saying, "Well I'm glad you were keeping her company. It's not good for her to be wandering around alone in Diagon Alley."

She squared her shoulders and crossed her arms defensively at his tone. "I was waiting for Alice to show up. We arranged to meet at the Owl Emporium."

"What time was she supposed to be here?" James asked quirking a brow.

"Over forty minutes ago." Lily replied looking down at her watch and frowning.

"Well I…"

James was interrupted by a small figure coming and crashing into Lily with excessive force.

"Lils I'm so sorry! My mum is an awful bitch from Hell who wouldn't let me out this morning until every inch of my room was spotless and then she got upset because I was wearing what she called 'awful clothing' and then…"

Lily laughed and hugged her friend saying, "Breathe Alice. It's fine and I'm glad you are here now."

Alice looked up to see who Lily had been talking to and upon seeing her cousin she launched herself at him as well.

"Gideon!" She screeched. "Why do we hardly see each other?"

"Probably because I'm too busy spending time with my sister's rapidly growing brood of children and you are too busy snogging your boyfriend all the time."

"I'm not always snogging Frank I…"

"Alice!"

Turning at the sound of Frank's voice Alice rushed toward him down the street and instantly began kissing him senseless.

The other three laughed and shook their heads in amusement before James said, "Well there are a couple of items in Quality Quidditch Supplies that are calling my name and Sirius has probably already gotten his hands all over them."

Gideon grinned and said, "Well I'm off I'm going to go home and get some sleep while I can. You two have a good day and tell Alice I'm sure I'll see her soon."

He leaned down and hugged Lily goodbye whispering in her ear, "Try not to throw up on his shoes this time eh?"

She blushed crimson and waved goodbye as he ambled on down the street. As he disappeared from sight Lily noticed the frown on James' face.

"What's the matter?" She asked curiously.

He shook his head and smiled at her warmly. "Nothing. Would you like to go to the quidditch shop with me and Alice can catch up with us later?"

She nodded and called out to Alice that she would be with James, before the two of them set off.

He seemed distracted as they walked and Lily wondered what was on his mind.

"So you've been having a fun summer by the sound of it." She said softly very aware of him and how close together they were walking.

"It hasn't been too bad. My friends have kept me rather busy as you know and I've done a lot of lounging around." James shrugged stepping behind her for a moment to let a rather large group of people pass them by. "I've been thinking of you a lot." He said biting his lip as he stepped back into place beside her.

Lily nodded and tried to will away the butterfly sensation that was once again taking over her stomach.

"I've been thinking of you as well."

James sighed at her words and stopped her suddenly, pulling her toward the window of the nearest shop. He gripped her hand tightly as he tried to gather his thoughts.

"I know it's ridiculous of me but I've got to tell you a few things. Things I know you likely aren't ready to hear and things that I know sound comical coming from me but…"

He took a deep breathe and looked down at their joined hands.

"Firstly, I'm afraid to inform you that if you thought I was hopelessly addicted to you before, well I've gotten worse. I can't stop thinking about you. Missing you. Some days I hate myself for being so pathetic but there it is. Secondly I've made a few decisions about us. You aren't going to like them but I've made up my mind and you aren't going to change it. I've decided…"

He took another deep breathe before he raised his golden eyes to hers.

"I've decided I can't be your friend. Not without giving it my best to get you to consider letting me be something more to you. I know you haven't really thought of me the way I've thought of you for so long but damn Lily I can't just sit by and be just your friend without knowing if things could go further between us. I've tried to give you time and space and whatever you need in order for you to not see me as 'that stupid prat James Potter' but …" He paused and ran a hand through his already messy jet black hair and looked at her earnestly. "I've made the decision to pursue you, to try and win you over in any way that I can. I just thought it would be proper to give you fair warning."

He paused and Lily began to shift her weight from foot to foot as her nerves raced out of control. For the life of her she couldn't look away from him though. There was so much feeling in just the way he was looking at her that she found herself breathing rapidly in response to how quickly her heart was pounding.

"So this is your warning Lily Evans." He said firmly, his voice thick with emotion. "I'll leave you be today but…when September first rolls around and we are back at school things are going to be different. I'm going to convince you that I'm enough for you. That I can be what you want. That what there is between us is worth anything. Everything."

He smiled slowly and said softly, "Alright?"

"James I…" Lily began, but stopped as he squeezed her hand and shook his head.

He tugged lightly on her until she was flush up against him and he could place his other hand on the back of her neck, holding her gaze with his.

"Alright Lily?" He repeated softly once again.

She swallowed thickly and nodded.

"Alright James."

The words were no more than a whisper but it didn't matter. They were both aware of what they meant.

Lily didn't know how long they stood like that. Her right hand in his left one, his right hand at her neck with his thumb running along the bottom of her jaw. Her spare hand fisted in James shirt just beneath his ribs. She wasn't aware of who glanced at them or stared openly in curiosity. She wasn't aware that she was breathing deeply. She was only aware of James and of the look in his eyes as he stared down at her.

"When you look at me like that," She found herself saying softly, "It's enough to make me forget everything else."

James grinned and held her tighter.

"Good, just be with me." He rumbled back just as quietly.

She nodded. That sounded good to her.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

James nearly growled when someone pulled on his shoulder, jerking him away from Lily.

"Prongs, what in Merlin's name are you doing? You were supposed to meet me ages ago." Sirius said gesturing toward Quality Quidditch Supplies that was thirty feet away.

"Sorry Padfoot." He said trying to pull himself back into the here and now.

He sighed when Sirius caught sight of Lily and pounced on her.

"Lily-flower! I didn't see you there. Are you school shopping?" He asked enveloping her in a huge hug and forcing her to let go of James hand.

"I…um…yes." She managed shakily.

She looked flustered and off-kilter. James sighed softly. He was more than a little aware of what it was going to take to convince her that they needed each other. It didn't help that he knew she never went about anything unless she was absolutely certain it was the right thing to do. She had a hard time letting people in regardless and the fact that he'd scared away anyone who could ever have been potential boyfriend material for her didn't help him at all either, as she was now probably even more wary about what to expect from him and nervous about what he expected of her.

If only she knew that all he wanted was the right to call her his. To say that she belonged to him and no one else and that she wanted him for her own in return. If she could just give him that he would die a happy man.

"James? Hel-lo! Are you awake mate?"

He snapped his head around when he realized Sirius was speaking to him.

"What?"

"I said are you ready to go look at that new broomstick? Lily's already agreed to come with." His best friend explained.

"Oh…ya, right let's go." He answered looking at Lily again.

She looked at him and bit her lip. A tell-tale sign that she was nervous. James grinned and grabbed her hand.

"Come on Evans," He said trying to act jovial and natural, "We'll have you look over the merchandise and give us your opinion."

He dragged her along into the shop and before long he and Sirius had her laughing and smiling and feeling more like herself. But every time their gazes locked James felt that something, that strange pull that always made him swear there were forces beyond his control telling him he was supposed to be with Lily Evans.

And if he wasn't mistaken, he could swear she was now aware of it too.

OOOOOOOOOOOOO

"So are you gonna tell me what happened?" Sirius questioned as they entered their last shop of the day.

"What do you mean?" James asked searching the items in the apothecary for the ones he needed.

"Don't play dumb with me mate. I know something happened. There was so much going on between the two of you today that I felt like I was running full out just to keep up. What happened between you and her?"

James fiddled with the handle of one of the scoops for potion ingredients and thought over what to tell Sirius. Lily had left them once Alice arrived in the bookstore and told her they needed to catch up. James had let her go willingly, well aware that she needed both time and space to think over his earlier declaration. He could only hope that she would realize he was right and that _not_ testing the waters between them wasn't fair to either of them.

"I told her I couldn't be just friends with her anymore." James said finally, moving on down the shelves and trying to sound more casual than he felt.

"What did she say to that?" Sirius exclaimed following closely on his heels.

"She said 'alright'."

"That's it? Just alright? You told her you wanted to be more than friends right?" James nodded and Sirius frowned. "So that's it? You told her that and she said 'alright' and that's all?"

"That's all I would let her say." James replied feeling frustrated. "I wanted her to think about it. To give it time to sink in, to actually consider the idea that I might be right, that we might be great together if she'd just give us a chance. So she said 'alright' because that's all I wanted her to say."

"For Merlin's sake James you could have at least kissed her or…"

"I know okay! I know what I could and could not have done and I know I probably shouldn't even have done what I did, but seeing her with Gideon this morning made my insides scream and before I knew it I found myself telling her that I cared about her more than ever and that I was going to start actively pursuing her in a romantic way!" James fumed. "I don't know what came over me. I planned to tell her later, when we were already back at school and…"

He trailed off and leaned his head against one of the taller shelves.

"I'm a complete idiot I know but…she makes me do crazy things. Want things I shouldn't."

Sirius grinned and put an arm around his friends' shoulders to steer him toward the ingredients they actually needed.

"You're a seventeen year old virgin mate, I think you are entitled to want as much as you damned well please."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

At the end of the day as James and Sirius made their way toward the Leaky Cauldron, where they were supposed to meet up with James' parents their attention was caught by a loud shrieking voice up ahead.

"Godric help me I think that's my mother." Sirius said swallowing thickly and squaring his shoulders as he marched ahead.

As they neared the noise James noticed that a crowd was gathered around two shouting people and his stomach dropped as he realized that apart from Sirius' mother the other figure was Lily.

"…You're nothing but filth! MUDBLOOD trash that isn't good enough to lick my sons feet much less entertain romantic ideas about him! You belong in a back-alley brothel somewhere…"

"Don't play the saint with me you awful bitch! I'm not the one who treated my son so badly he felt it necessary to go and live with someone else! Just because he isn't evil and nasty like the rest of you! Just because he's actually a wonderful person who gives a damn about others! If anyone isn't fit to lick his feet it's you! I may not have your precious bloodlines but at least I have the good sense to treat your son the way he deserves !" Lily shouted back hotly.

"Your nothing little girl! At least my son knows well enough to put you where you're useful! Life on your back won't be so hard as trying to stand on those wretched Mudblood feet!"

Sirius forcefully shoved his way through the crowd and stepped between the two combatants, James was right on his heels.

"Hello mum I see you've been making friends again." Sirius drawled idly his voice betraying the heavy emotion James knew he must be feeling.

"Just chatting with your little Mudblood whore," his mother spat.

"Don't call her that. You don't know anything about me or my friends and it would make my day if you'd agree to never call me your son again either." Sirius bit back venomously.

"Oh trust me I quit claiming you long ago my boy! Still, I'd at least prefer you kept yourself clear of the taint this one brings with her. Good blood is good blood whether you're a bad apple or no and I despise the notion of you diluting it with something as muck-filled as her."

Sirius stared at his mother with pure venomous hatred. He'd never wanted to hurt someone so much as he wanted to hurt her in that moment.

"I hope you die a cold lonely death you fucking horrid bitch!" He bit out scathingly before turning to his friends and ushering them away from her.

As they moved off he heard her call back at him, "At least I still have one good son!"

James led them to a small alcove that was near the Leaky Cauldron. Before he could speak Lily launched herself at Sirius holding him about his middle and burying her face in his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry!" She said sounding choked. "I didn't mean to yell and curse at your mother like that…I only…the things she was saying about you were awful! I wanted to hex her for the way she talked about you! Alice kept pulling me back so that I wouldn't just up and slug her…"

Lily pulled back and looked up at Sirius whose eyes were still black as night he was so angry.

"You listen to me Sirius Black. I don't care who your blasted mother is or what she says about you. I know you're wonderful. You are a more loyal friend than anyone could ever ask for and I care about and respect you so much. If your family can't see you for how absolutely amazing you are then they don't deserve you!" Lily paused and James watched as she swallowed back the tears that were threatening to spill over. "If people like you and me let the circumstances of our birth get in the way of who we are or what we are destined to become then we are letting _them _win. And I'll be damned if I don't go down as the best damn witch this side of Iceland!"

Sirius chuckled at her words and pulled her tight against him.

"Damnit Evans," He breathed roughly, "You really take the steam out of a bloke you know that?"

"Does that mean you forgive me for calling your mother an awful bitch?" Lily asked meekly as her face pressed against Sirius' chest.

"I suppose so considering I called her a fucking horrid one." Sirius said back leaning his cheek against her head.

They were all silent for a moment, Lily and Sirius recovering their calm while James and Alice leaned against one another waiting.

After a time Sirius said softly, "You know Evans if James wouldn't have claimed you when we were eleven I would most definitely marry you right now."

He winked at James over Lily's shoulder and smiled cheekily.

Lily chuckled and pulled back, "You liar, we all know you're sweet on Mar…"

Sirius covered her mouth with his hand.

"Don't even say it." He groaned. "It will only make it worse."  
Lily nodded a smile now in her eyes as Sirius lowered his hand away.

"So I guess my reputation is making the rounds then?" She said chuckling softly. "I mean if your mother's heard we're _involved_ then who knows who else it has gotten to."

"My guess is everyone in England at this point. I think they might even have heard my mum's shouting in Ireland but you can't be certain. I just wish she would have mentioned how amazingly satisfied you were." Sirius teased and Lily punched him on the arm.

Alice moved forward and gave Lily a slight squeeze. "Well we definitely had our fill of excitement for the day." She said grinning. "Are you ready to go home now?"

At Lily's nod they moved off.

James kept shooting glances at her as they made their way toward the Leaky Cauldron. She looked alright now but he could tell that they day as a whole had shaken her.

As Sirius and Alice passed through the doorway into the pub he caught her arm and held her back pulling her to the side and pressing her up against the wall.

"Are you alright?" He asked seriously. "I mean really?"

She sighed and let her head fall back against the wall for a moment while her eyes slid shut. After a few seconds she nodded and said, "As alright as I can be after a day like today."

James nodded and when her eyes opened he said softly, "You have no idea what you did for him back there. Telling him those things. Meaning them. I try to convince him all the time that he's better than them, that they don't deserve him. It's not the same coming from me though. I've been his best friend for too long. He's of the opinion that I have to love him no matter what. He needed that. Thank you."

Without saying anything else James leaned down and captured her lips quickly, catching the taste of her and feeling every inch of his body come alive.

"Can I take you home?" He asked softly reaching up and letting his thumb stroke the full lower lip he had just brushed with his own.

She shook her head. "Alice is going to take me."

James nodded and before he could question himself he leaned down and kissed her quickly once more.

"Don't forget." He said knowing his voice was too thick and his grip on her jaw a little too tight. "One way or another I'm going to convince you I'm right for you."

He grabbed her hand and dragged her inside tugging her unceremoniously over to Alice and hugging her fiercely for a moment before marching off to find his parents.

"James…" She called out stopping him.

As he turned and his eyes locked with hers he knew that she was scared. Terrified of everything he was offering her and more.

"I won't forget."

He nodded and tried not to put a hand to where his heart had clenched in his chest as he moved away from her and forced himself to not look back.


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: JKR is the genius behind Harry Potter not me**

**Author's Note: **

**To all of you who reviewed Thankyou so much! It means a lot to me that you guys are enjoying my story and (I know I say this all the time) but I really truly love hearing what you guys think! It's great to get so much positive feedback! So thanks again and keep it up please!**

**This chapter started off a little to jumpy for my liking but I really didn't want to linger on any of the beginning stuff that much at all...I really didn't see the point in dragging it all out so instead I sort of ended up with a chapter that's a bit less flowy in the beginning than I would have liked but that is also not a complete bore to read. So sorry if the beginning is a bit to choppy for your tastes. It was either that or ramble about unnecessary things and I chose what I believed to be the lesser of two evils.**

**There is ROMANCE in this chapter so I'm sure you will all love it! I know I loved finally getting to write it :) I ended it where I did because I needed a break to cool my imagination down a little (it runs away with me sometimes and if I would have let that happen who knows where Lily and James might have ended up LOL)**

**But anyway thanks again to everybody and I really hope you enjoy this one!**

**Chapter 16**

**Accidental Advice, Happy News? and a Train Station Tryst**

Lily woke the morning after she'd gone shopping in Diagon Alley to thoughts of James. She'd barely managed to fall asleep sometime in the early hours of the morning and had of course managed to dream of him off and on all throughout the hours since then. She couldn't keep herself from thinking about what he'd said and what it would mean come September first.

She was of course absolutely terrified of what he would say or do. All her worries about him were building up and pretty soon she was going to have to make a decision about them and come to face them head on. If James was making the decision to take things a step up from friends, she was going to have to make the decision as to whether or not she was going to let him. Her hands shook just thinking about it.

Trying to distract herself with thoughts of food, she leapt out of bed and made her way down the stairs to get some breakfast. It was there she found her mother pouring herself coffee and looking over the morning post.

"Good morning honey. How was your shopping trip?"

Lily sighed as she poured herself a cup of coffee, feeling as if she was going to have a definite need for caffeine that day.

"It went alright. Lots of things on my list this year." She answered. "I might have to go back for new robes as I forgot to look mine over and see what condition they're in."

Rose Evans nodded. "Well at least you got a lot of the major things taken care of." There was a moment's pause before she added. "Petunia found a lovely dress to wear to the Dursley's supper."  
Lily smiled softly. "That's good. It will be one less thing for her to worry about if she feels she looks good."

"As much as I'm not exactly crazy about Vernon, he makes her happy and in the end that's all I really want for both of you girls. To find someone who really makes you happy."

Lily mulled over her mother's words as she searched through the fridge for breakfast food.

"Do you think he does? Make her really happy that is?" She asked thoughtfully. "I mean how can you know for sure that the two of them will work out well together?"

"Well you can't know that. That's part of the risk you take when you date someone." Her mother replied watching as Lily began to methodically cut up fruit. "It's all about taking a chance and I think that in your sisters' case she's very willing to take that chance with him. I think that if the two of them are as interested in each other as they seem that there's every possibility they could end up happy."

"That's the hard part though isn't it? Taking the chance, putting yourself out there with the possibility that you could be rejected, that you might not be what the other person was expecting at all." Lily sighed. "It could ruin things. So why do people risk it?"

Rose Evans smiled. "Because sometimes the risk is well worth the reward. Finding someone you get on with is worth a lot of risk, if only because it can make you infinitely more happy than you would have been had you been too afraid to really try things out. People aren't meant to go through life alone. Everything is better when you have someone to share it with."

Lily scooped up her cut fruit and placed it into a bowl before looking at her mother searchingly. "So you think that's what Petunia is doing? Taking a risk with Vernon, putting herself out there with the hope that he might be the one?"

Rose nodded. "I think that's exactly what she's doing."

Lily was silent for a moment before saying softly, "Thanks mum."

Grabbing a fork and kissing her mother on the cheek as she strolled by she made her way up to her room considering the notion that if her sister was willing to be brave, perhaps she could be as well.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

James stared at the letter again. Still unsure as to whether or not he was willing to believe it. Part of him truly suspected that it was just some silly prank of Sirius'. He glanced down at the badge in his hand and looked it over intently. What the hell had Dumbledore been thinking?

He made his way toward his father's office still reeling internally. He paused in the doorway unsure of what to say.

Jason looked up at him and pushed his glasses onto his nose more firmly. "What is it son?"

James shrugged dazedly and turned both the badge and the parchment over to his dad in silence. He watched as his father read over it once, then again. When he looked back up at James his smile was wide and the look in his eyes was one of pride.

"Congratulations." He said rather throatily. "I'm…very proud."

James frowned, "Are you sure this isn't just one of Sirius' jokes?"

His dad chuckled and stood, coming around the desk to stand next to James. He handed back over the parchment and the badge and leaned back against his desk as he eyed his son with interest.

"What do you think?" Jason questioned.

"I have no idea." James shrugged. "I never would have even thought this was a possibility. I wasn't a prefect and I caused more trouble and mischief than most of my teachers could have thought possible. I never in a million years would have guessed that I would be chosen for something like this."

"But what about all the changes you've made this past year? Your mother and I didn't receive half as many owls about your misconduct. We didn't receive any about you getting into any fights…" He chuckled as James flushed slightly. "Obviously you weren't caught then.

"My point is you've done a lot of growing up this past year and I'm sure that Dumbledore and the rest of your teachers have noticed it."

James thought over that while his father waited.

"Do you think I could be good at this dad? That I could do a decent job?"

Grinning, Jason clapped a hand on his shoulder. "I think that you can do anything you set your mind to, whether it's being a leader, causing trouble or convincing Lily Evans to be your girlfriend."

"Sodding Sirius," James growled blushing madly at his dad's words, "I knew I should have found a best mate who could keep his ruddy mouth shut."

"Don't be too hard on him. He was actually complimenting you at the time. He seems to think it's only a matter of time before Lily realizes that you're the man of her dreams. His words not mine."

James laughed and then took a deep breathe.

"So I guess I'll do my best then." He stated plainly.

"There's the spirit son." His father said, squeezing his shoulder affectionately as he steered him toward the doorway. "Now let's go tell your mother that we've somehow managed to miraculously produce Head Boy material."

Lily stared at James' letter in astonishment. She couldn't believe her eyes.

James Potter had been made Head Boy.

And she had found out the day before that she was Head Girl.

So now they would be sharing head duties…and a dormitory!...Merlin help her!

She read over the letter again and yet it did nothing to calm her racing thoughts. What should she tell him? Did she let him know that she was Head Girl? Or did she wait and tell him once they were on the train? No she needed to tell him before that…

Groaning in frustration she sat down and began to write. When she was done and she had sent James' owl back in the direction from which it had come, hoping that her letter sounded as excited as she had intended it to, she began to smile in amusement. Dumbledore had just paved the way for James Potter to pursue her, because there would be no avoiding him now. In her oddly stressed out state, teetering on the brink of insanity, she found the idea rather comical.

Two weeks later on September first Lily Evans once again found herself standing alone near the big scarlet steam engine as she searched the crowd for her friends. She tried to be prepared for anything, not letting herself remain looking in one direction for too long just in case her friends decided to launch themselves at her again.

When she spotted Dorcas she grinned in excitement. She waved at her happily and once she managed to reach Lily the two girls embraced happily.

"It's great to see you Lils. Not that I don't love your dad but he plans way too many family activities during the summer. I feel like I've hardly seen you at all."  
"That's because you haven't. Aside from Sirius' party I didn't get to see you and Marlene at all. The only other time I saw Alice was shopping in Diagon Alley, when you were in France and Marlene was busy babysitting the brood." Lily replied.

"Well congratulations in person on becoming Head Girl! We always knew it would be you!" Dorcas said rolling her eyes affectionately.

Lily grinned. "It is pretty exciting. I kind of always hoped I'd get it."

"Psshhhh, the real surprise is Potter being Head Boy. I always suspected Dumbledore was nutters but now it's been confirmed."

Lily chuckled at her friends' joking and tried to look as if the mention of James didn't make every nerve fiber in her entire body thrum in response.

"Where do you think the others are?" She asked a little more breathlessly than she had intended.

"Probably running late on Marlene's part and Alice is probably busy snogging Frank senseless." Dorcas answered choosing to ignore her friends' obvious reaction to the mention of James.

"Well do you want to head to our compartment? We can just meet up with them there." Lily offered, trying to sound as casual as possible.

Truthfully she wanted to escape to the safety of the compartment before she caught sight of James. She had no idea what he would say…or do…and she was anxious to delay their meeting for as long as she could.

Thankfully Dorcas agreed to head to the compartment with her. Shortly after they'd settled in Marlene appeared and just before the train took off, so did a breathless Alice.

"Have a nice holiday everyone?" She asked casually, trying to straighten her rumpled clothes and mussed up hair.

Her friends giggled at her disheveled state and began to tell her all about their holiday when Marlene broke in frowning. "Where do you think the boys are?"

"I don't know." Dorcas replied her brow furrowing as well. "I haven't seen them yet today."

"Do you think they got held up somewhere or..." The compartment door opened suddenly to allow four completely disheveled boys to tumble in cutting off Marlene's speculations.

They were all laughing uproariously and falling all over each other.

"Oh that was great did you see his face when he saw you were Head Boy?" Sirius chortled.

"Completely priceless." Remus threw in.

"He never saw that one coming." Peter added gleefully.

The others continued to chuckle over the incident but James eyes had shot straight to Lily, who was doing her best to look at any of them but him. She knew that the second things settled down would be the second her control would snap.

She was already unable to help her jumping pulse and clammy hands and she was sure that the heat in her cheeks had to be visible to everyone around her. Just the sight of him was enough to make her feel completely unbalanced.

He looked so good it should be illegal. His hair looked as if it had just been cut despite its untamed state and the jet black locks looked so silky she wanted to run her fingers through them. His golden skin was even more so from all the time spent out doors that summer and his brown eyes were darker than usual. Yet, despite the attractiveness of him as a whole it took her far longer to tear her gaze away from his lips than anywhere else. Remembering how they had felt on her own was suddenly a heat-infusing thought and Lily had to resist the urge to fan herself with something.

She waited a few moments trying to compose herself while they laughed back and forth and when she found an opening she took it.

"So who did you catch off guard then?" She asked as meekly as she could manage.

"Snivelly of course!" Sirius exclaimed. "And his band of ill-bred minions."

The boys launched into an all out re-telling of how they'd caught Snape and his cronies trying to intimidate a few first years into giving up their compartment and how after exchanging a few choice words they had eventually revealed that James was Head Boy.

"Oh the look on their faces! They couldn't believe that their worst nightmares had come true!" Sirius said the look in his eye one of sheer enjoyment.

As the boys began to take their seats Lily tried not to freeze completely. She failed altogether though when James came and made to sit on the floor in front of her.

"Aren't you going to switch him?" Alice questioned her. "I mean don't you usually sit on the floor?"

Lily swallowed visibly and tried to answer her but nothing seemed to want to come out. It was like along with the rest of her body her voice box had ceased to function. In fact the only thing that did seem to be fully functional was her heart as it hammered out of control in her chest.

"Are you okay Lils? You look…a bit scared actually." Marlene mused, quirking an eyebrow at her.

"I…" Lily managed shakily. She cleared her throat and tried again but was met with the same results.

She bit her lip as James turned himself about to look at her. She looked out the window intently ignoring the stares she knew she was getting from her friends and trying even harder to ignore the one he was giving her.

"Lily." He said his voice deep and rich and oh so tempting.

She ignored him and continued to stare at the window pane. Merlin help her she was behaving like a complete idiot. But she couldn't help it. She was absolutely without a doubt completely and utterly so unsure of herself in that moment that she was at a loss to do anything but ignore him or run from him.

She hadn't been able to stop thinking about him and about how he felt about her and how she felt about him all summer. She couldn't keep herself from feeling doubtful about whether or not she would live up to his expectations and she also couldn't keep herself from thinking about how great it might be to actually be with him like he wanted.

Now as she was actually stuck in the moment she'd been thinking about constantly these past few weeks it seemed all her mother's words about risk taking were suddenly flying right out the window and what was left behind was a scared and thoroughly confidence lacking Lily.

"Lily." He said again, deeper, more insistently.

She shook her head no at him.

"For Merlin's sake Lily I wasn't issuing a death sentence that day you know. I was merely trying to…"

She bit her lip at his words, internally begging him to stop.

He shook his head as if he knew what the small movement meant and put a hand on her knee. But before he could speak she reached down and shoved his hand away saying pleadingly, "Don't. Please."

James frowned at her then.

"Are you that afraid of me now?" He bit out sounding stunned.

Lily couldn't stay seated for another second. She was panicking and she knew it but she couldn't keep herself from jumping out of her seat and saying flatly, "I'm bloody terrified." She shot toward the compartment door as James leapt to his feet and before she knew it she was being stalked down the length of the train.

He followed her easily slipping past the students that she seemed unable to avoid. She collided with one after another before she found herself being pulled to a stop and shoved behind him. He grasped her hand firmly and with a look that told her she had no choice in the matter he began to lead her further down along the train.

She couldn't fathom where they were going or why, all she knew was that her brain was no longer working. It couldn't formulate a coherent thought about anything. She barely registered that her stomach was in knots and she was so worked up she could barely breathe.

Suddenly they were standing outside a compartment that had larger doors than was usual. She heard James say something though she didn't catch what it was and then the doors were sliding open of their own accord and James was yanking her inside and shoving her back against a wall in a position that was becoming all too familiar to the two of them.

He reached out and grabbed her, his thumbs situated on sides of her jaw as he stared at her intently a small smile on his face.

"I knew I was going to have to chase you. I never dreamed you'd make it easy. But this is taking it a little far don't you think?" He said trying to sound idle and nonchalant.

Lily just stared at him; with what she was sure later on was very likely a deer in the headlights look. He started rubbing his thumbs along her jaw slowly. Methodically.

"Breathe okay." He commanded softly. "Just take deep breaths."

Lily obeyed only because it seemed like the most sensible option considering the frantic racing of her pulse and the way she seemed to be having trouble getting enough oxygen to not feel light headed.

After awhile James stopped and moved in closer to her, his body very nearly flush with hers.

"Why are you terrified? Am I that bad?" He asked his voice still soft.

"No." She whispered back. "You're not. That's the problem."

"I don't understand."

Lily watched his lips move as he spoke, before letting her eyes lift to meet his once more.

"I'm afraid I'm that bad. That this won't be what you want it to be." She paused and took a startled breath as one of his hands slid around to cup the back of her head. "That I won't be what you want me to be."

"That's not possible." James leaned in and pressed his forehead to hers. "Don't you think I'm scared too? Don't you think I've been over this moment a thousand times in my head? Cause I have. I've played out every possible scenario I could conjure up and in very nearly every one of them you find me lacking in some way." He admitted his eyes closing as he breathed in deeply. "I'm begging you not to run from me Lily. It's hard enough chasing you when you stand still."

She surprised herself by reaching up and grabbing onto his wrist on the hand that still held her head.

"People run when they're afraid." She whispered shakily, gripping him tightly.

"Then don't be afraid." He breathed. "Give me a chance."

"I don't know if I can." She answered back honestly.

"You can." He whispered so softly she barely caught it before his lips caught hers.

It was nothing like the kisses they'd shared before. There was nothing short or simple about it. It was hot and heady and so much more than Lily had even dreamed.

His lips moved over hers sensually. He made her breathe catch every time he lingered over the fullness of her lower lip. He kissed her in long sweeping drags that made something deep in her stomach begin to burn.

Still cradling her head in one hand he moved his other hand down to sweep around her and pull her up against his chest. Her own hand found its way to his shoulder somehow and then he did something that made what she was feeling before resemble the brush of butterfly wings.

His tongue brushed along her lower lip entreatingly begging her for something she didn't really know anything about. Her gasp was all the permission he needed though, and she soon found herself overwhelmed by the sensation of being well and truly kissed by James Potter.

He groaned at the taste of her and Lily found her whole body blazing in reaction to the sound. As James tongue moved wicked and desperate against hers she found herself unable to control her grip on him. She was pulling him closer trying to press herself as fully up against him as she could. And he was complying.

Crushing her to him in a grip so hard it would probably bruise later James was every bit as hungry for the pressure and feel of her up against him as she was.

He had never been so completely turned on in his entire life. Kissing her like this was even more overwhelming than he had expected it to be. His chest roared with the need to possess her. To cover her as best he could with his own body, his own skin. To show her just how much he'd been craving the taste of her that he was drowning in now.

She was so unbelievably sweet. It was enough to drive him mad. Gripping her tightly he showed her what it was like to really kiss someone. To give over everything that you were feeling into a single action that laid claim to something within both of you.

He tilted her head back more and deepened the kiss even further. The breathless moan she let out sent shivers down his spine. He found himself fisting his hand in her hair even as her own hand snaked up and gripped his.

All rational thought had left him. He was so completely caught up in her, her taste, the feel of her hair, the incredible way she smelled, that he knew for sure he was lost forever to the girl in his arms.

He had no idea how long he'd been holding her. Kissing her like his life depended on it. It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was making her feel everything that he was and more.

His skin burned where she still gripped his wrist. His lower stomach ached with so much pressure that he wanted to groan loudly. His heart was slamming against his chest with so much force he was sure she could probably hear it and yet everything was so incredibly perfect that he could barely bring himself to pull away from her.

It took him three attempts before he could wrest his lips away from her own and bury his face against the crook of her shoulder.

They were both panting. Their breathing as ragged as if they'd just run miles. He felt as if he'd just let someone rip apart his chest and try to put it back together.

And yet she was still in his arms. Her breath coming out in hot bursts against the back of his neck as her head turned into him. Every supple, soft and sensual inch of her was still his for the moment. And he'd be damned if he was going to let her go yet.

"Damn Lily." He growled against her skin. "If I'd have known it could ever feel like that I'd have pinned you down and forced you to my way of thinking a long time ago."

She didn't say anything and after a few more moments he pulled back to look down at her.

Her expression was one of surprised wonder and confusion. Her lips were swollen and pouty looking and his grip on her tightened again as he looked at them. Her chest rose and fell rapidly in time with her breathing and it felt good moving against his own.

"How are you?" He asked her gently.

She looked at him curiously as if she were trying to figure out just what he was before she answered breathlessly, "I'm…hot."

He chuckled and nodded. "Me too."

Lily smiled at him then and moved to take her hands from his hair and off his wrist when her eyes widened. "I hadn't noticed you'd lifted me off the floor."

"It was easier than leaning down the whole time." He answered back now smiling widely.

She laughed lightly and then shook her head as if she were trying to clear it.

"You should probably put me down now." She informed him quietly.

He complied and set her feet back down on the floor gently. He held her for a moment as she stood on somewhat shaky legs.

He reached out and brushed a lock of hair that had fallen into her face back and tucked it behind her ear.

"I'm afraid you've officially ruined me for any other girl for the rest of my life." He said suddenly surprising himself. "I'll never be able to get the taste of you out of my head."

Her hand came up to innocently cover her lips. "Do I taste alright?"

James groaned squeezed her waist slightly. "You taste like an angel." He admitted throatily.

"How do you know what angels taste like?" She questioned playfully.

"Because I just got to kiss one." He answered back with a grin.

She blushed at the compliment and looked away from him.

They were silent for a little while both lost in their own thoughts and feelings. It was James who broke the silence.

"So does this mean you'll give me a chance?" He asked his gaze searching her own for signs of what she was thinking.

Her green eyes were vulnerable and wide as she replied honestly, "I'm still scared."

"I'll help you with that." He vowed earnestly.

"I need a little time to think." She stated biting her lip.

"I'll give it to you." He agreed readily.

"And we need to talk about things." She went on staring at his chest as she spoke. "I need to let you know why I'm so afraid of this. I need to explain to you why I'm so nervous about everything."

James nodded and smiled.

"So you're going to consider it though right? You're going to let me try and prove to you that this is right for both of us?"

Lily looked up at him and grabbed his hand shyly.

"After a kiss like that James Potter I'm willing to let you try pretty much anything."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all things affiliated belong to JK Rowling**

**Author's Note: Hello to everyone and I'm sorry for the long delay in updating but I've had a lot on my plate lately. I won't bore you with the details but I will say that I have the two chapters following this one written already and just waiting to be edited and uploaded...So there definately shouldn't be a long time in between postings this time :)**

**I want to thank everyone who reads this story! I am somewhere in the 13000 hits range and I can't believe it! That's really amazing! I'm also five reviews away from 100 which is also pretty dang awesome! So thankyou to everyone for reading this and for all your support you have all been really great!**

**This chapter is more to lead into the next chapter but some important things happen within it so without further ado read away :) and don't forget to review!**

**CHAPTER 17**

**Dormitory Daze and Another Drunken Cove**

Lily wasn't sure how she made it through the rest of the train ride. Somehow she and James had handled the meeting with the prefects (which it ended up was in the compartment he had led them to) and then along with Remus they had gone back to their friends. When she entered their compartment she had tried not to blush but had lost the battle. Her friends shot her knowing looks but thankfully didn't say a word. Before she knew it they were all heading off the train and making their way toward the horseless carriages that would take them up to the castle.

James talked and chatted almost like usual apart from the fact that his gaze kept shooting toward and lingering on Lily, who hadn't really said much to him at all since the kiss they had shared.

When they reached the castle Lily climbed out of the carriage and found herself surrounded by her friends who forced her to walk slowly and let the Marauders get a little ways ahead.

"Alright spill it." Alice demanded. "What did James do? You've been all spaced out since you two came back into the compartment."

Lily flushed crimson and bit her lip.

"Oh Merlin, he did it didn't he? He finally made a move on you?" Marlene squealed excitedly.

Lily felt hot all over as she nodded.

"Come on, tell us Lils." Dorcas begged.

Looking around at her friends and seeing their excited and determined expressions Lily sighed in defeat.

"He kissed me alright." She admitted throatily. "He _really_ kissed me."

Her friends all shrieked girlishly and began to hug and jostle her.

"Oh my goodness, so what does this mean?" Marlene questioned as they made their way through the large double doors of the Great Hall. "Are you two together now?"

Lily shook her head. "No but I've given him permission to convince me that we should be."

"I give it a week." Dorcas chirped excitedly.

"Two days." Marlene countered.

"Eight and a half." Alice said seriously.

"Why on Earth would you say eight and a half days?" Marlene snorted.

"Because that's what my gut was telling me."

"I think you're misinterpreting feelings of hunger." Dorcas giggled as they made their way to their seats next to the boys.

Lily fought the urge to roll her eyes as she found herself dropping into the only open seat, next to James.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

James grinned at Lily as she took her seat next to him and leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"So how long did they give me?"

She had to laugh a little at how well he knew her and her friends as she replied. "Marlene gave you two days, Dorcas a week and Alice eight and a half days."

"Come on Potter don't let me down this time." Alice said winking at him playfully from across the table.

"I'll do my best." He said sincerely before turning his attention to Dumbledore as he gave his usual, albeit slightly more somber, welcome back speech and introduced their newest Defense Against the Dark Arts professor Erik Trygvasson a tall handsome man with an obvious scar running along the left side of his face.

After the feast was over he and Lily helped the prefects escort the younger students to the Gryffindor common room before opening up the note McGonagall had given them that explained where the head's dormitory was located.

"So we round this next corner," James said reading the instructions, "and we give the password to the portrait of Sven the Strong-hearted."

They found the portrait they were looking for and James saw Lily grin at the depiction of what was apparently a Norse Viking in ready to do battle.

The man was dressed rather scantily his entire upper body bare but for the gold bands on his upper arms and the leather guards he wore about his forearms.

"Password?" He asked in a voice that was deep and gravelly.

Lily grinned cheekily at James and he rolled his eyes at her apparent approval of the Viking.

"Flobberworms." James said scowling in dislike at the word on the paper.

The portrait swung open and James shook his head as Lily waved a flirty goodbye to Sven before preceding him up the stairs.

Her slight 'oh' of exclamation was all James needed to know their dormitory was very likely rather impressive. When it came into view he couldn't help but grin. There were three couches set up in a U shape before a large fire-place with a good-sized square coffee table in between. Throughout the room there were other large squishy looking chairs and dozens of bookshelves filled with textbooks and other reading material for them to utilize.

The whole thing was done in Gryffindor colors as James and Lily were both from that house and the effect was rather pleasant.

James moved toward the door on the left side of the common room that had his name written across the top in bright gold lettering. He pushed open the door and admired the large four-poster bed with a scarlet comforter. There was a cushioned seat in the window, and more bookshelves along the walls and a smaller sofa set positioned between the window and the bed.

James turned to find Lily staring at a door positioned to the right of the fireplace with worry. Before James could ask her what was bothering her it clicked. They had to share a bathroom.

"Well that could get awkward I guess." He said rubbing the back of his head, and yawning tiredly. "Do you usually shower in the morning or at night?"

Lily shrugged, "It depends on how I feel that day."  
James nodded. "Same here. I guess we'll just have to lock it while we are in there and just work around each other."

After nodding in agreement Lily made her way into her room. James walked over and looked around the door frame smiling in approval.

"It seems like it suits you."

The bed spread was a shiny gold color with red trim and there were bookshelves and a sofa set and window seat just like in his room, only they were different colors and looked more feminine to him, and there was a large vanity positioned against one wall. There was also wallpaper that had red lilies with vine-like leaves stretching out to each other all across the walls.

"The wallpaper is a nice touch." He said grinning. "My walls are just a plain light gold."

She smiled and moved toward the bed and jumped into it grinning brightly.

"Somehow it feels more homey than the Gryffindor dorms." She said.

He nodded and then cleared his throat as he watched her lie back against her pillows.

"Well I think I'll get in the shower and then get some sleep." He said suddenly feeling rather hot.

As he moved away from her and headed toward the bathroom it occurred to him that he had just realized the drawback to sharing space with her. He sighed as he figured that he was probably just going to have to get used to being hard as a rock all the time.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Lily was still adjusting to sharing space with James. It had only been five days so far but she still couldn't get over the idea that he slept such a short distance away from her. That he showered where she showered. That he would be there to see her look her absolute worst in the mornings. It all took a lot of getting used to.

She had appreciated his acting so normal the first night they stayed together. She had been nervous and jittery enough about sharing space with him and on top of that she hadn't been able to get their kiss out of her mind. Once classes had begun and their duties as head boy and girl began Lily found herself occupied between thoughts of school and thoughts of James. And once classes started so had James' plan to woo Lily.

She found herself torn between amusement and embarrassment as he sought her out in between all their classes offering to carry her books, sometimes flirting with her outrageously and other times just walking in silence. She realized it was a declaration of sorts to the entire Hogwarts population that he had every intention of getting her to become his girlfriend. When they walked together people would stare and whisper and make Lily very uncomfortable but James would merely ignore them all. He talked to her about everything just as they used to in their Friday library meetings and she found herself feeling all too comfortable with him all over again.

It was on Monday the fifth day into term when he began to move forward more. As they exited their portrait hole and made their way down to breakfast he shifted their books to his left arm and grabbed her hand in his.

Lily tugged lightly and tried to pull away but he wouldn't have it.

"Come on Lils it's not like I'm mauling you in front of the whole school or something. I'm just…trying to be gentlemanly is all."

She bit her lip shyly, but allowed him to keep a firm hold on her hand all the way to the Great Hall. She found herself unsure of whether she was relieved or disappointed to have him let go of her.

All through that day he held her hand in between classes and all day long people whispered again and James just continued on as usual openly demonstrating his intentions. Before long Lily found that she was beginning to like the small gesture immensely.

She wasn't sure about her reluctance with James any longer. It was as if he were slowly tearing down her defenses and making her consider the idea that there really wasn't anything but her fear keeping them from being together. The problem was her fear was hard to bury. Even more so when some of the gossip that was flying around would reach her.

She had just walked into the girls bathroom on the fourth floor soon after the whole thing started when she heard Sarah Janson a fifth year Gryffindor talking about her.

"Well it's no wonder he's making such a big fuss about the whole thing. I mean Lily Evans has always been an attention whore. She probably asked him to make some big production out of it so that people would quit thinking she was easy."

"I don't think that sounds much like Lily Evans." She heard another voice reply. "Every time I've talked to her she seems really nice. At our prefect meetings she is always willing to talk or help you if you need it."

"Well I still think she's an attention whore. And I think she's got James Potter fooled with her whole 'I'm so innocent' act. Who knows what he's thinking anyway, I mean I'm not prejudiced or anything but it's not like his family would ever approve of her. He's got one of the oldest pureblood lines left." Sarah replied haughtily.

Lily shook her head at the silliness of it and plastered a smile on her face and rounded the corner. She stepped up to the mirror next to the owner of the second voice, who she realized was Zaria Spinnet a fifth year Gryffindor prefect, and pretended to be looking over her appearance in the mirror.

She smiled at the other two girls and said sweetly, "How are your classes going?"

"Not too bad." Zaria said grinning. "I'm rather enjoying professor Trygvasson's lessons in Defense Against the Dark Arts. He's been a pretty interesting instructor so far."  
Lily nodded, "I like him too. Although I'll admit I don't always get his jokes."

"I don't think anyone does." Zaria agreed chuckling.

"Well I don't really like him yet. He's handsome though." Sarah threw in as she fluffed her hair. "It's just too bad he's got that awful scar along his cheek."

"Well we can't all have model looks." Lily replied winking at Zaria.

She finished pretending to look herself over and after washing her hands, which had been the point of her going into the bathroom in the first place, she waltzed out followed by the other two.

"See." She heard Zaria whisper. "I told you she was nice."

She found James leaning against the wall waiting for her and he smiled when he looked up and saw her.

"Hi Lils." He said reaching for her hand. "I thought I might have missed you coming out of potions."

"Nope you were just too busy with Sirius discussing what does and does not constitute second base with a girl."

James flushed crimson and squeezed her hand. "Heard that did you?"

Lily nodded enjoying his discomfort before taking pity on him, "Hope I didn't keep you waiting long."

He grinned and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. "Of course not. For you I'd wait forever."

Now it was Lily's turn to blush, especially as she heard Zaria whisper girlishly to Sarah, "He is so sweet!"

The color faded however when she caught wind of Sarah's a little too loud reply, "I still say it's an act. I'd be sweet to someone too if they gave me what I wanted all the time."

James' head jerked up at the comment and Lily saw out of the corner of her eye that Sarah at least had the grace to look embarrassed as he shot an angry glance at her.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"  
Lily tugged on his arm and said earnestly, "Just leave it alone James. It's nothing."

He continued to scowl at the younger girl darkly even as Lily tugged him away. Once they were around the corner he rounded on Lily.

"Are they still talking about you?" He bit out irritably.

She went to say something soothing and change the subject but he stopped her with a tug on her arm.

"I'm serious Lily. Are they still spreading rumors about you?"

She sighed and nodded. "Some people are. Others aren't. Let's just leave it alone okay."

"I knew my mum was wrong." He said shaking his head. "I talked to her about the things that they were saying about you and she told me eventually people would find something better to gossip about. But it's not really happening is it? They aren't going to just let it go."

Lily shrugged, "Some people will and some people won't. It's alright. I'm used to them talking bout me. I'm Muggleborn remember."  
"It's ridiculous Lily. They think that because of who my parents are that it makes me better than you in some way. When in reality it couldn't be more opposite." He said angrily.

She smiled softly, "I wouldn't say that. There are definitely times when I think you might be better than me."

James made a scoffing noise.

"Like in quidditch." She said nodding. "You're definitely better than me at quidditch. Or in DADA. You're better than me at that. And…"

She stopped as he pulled her up against his chest with his free arm.

"You know what I meant." He said softly.

She nodded and looked at the center of his chest. "I know."

"I'm sorry they make you feel uncomfortable." He said knowingly.

"It's alright. It's none of their business if we like each other." She said raising her eyes to his.

He smiled brightly then.  
"So you definitely like me then Lils?"

She bit her lip and nodded and James laughed happily and began to pull her toward the Great Hall for lunch.

"Well that's good to know. I was beginning to think our relationship was totally one sided." He teased.

Lily knew the rumors would continue to fly but there wasn't much she could do about the whole thing and she was beginning more and more to try and adopt James' policy of not caring what people thought.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It was really late on the night of the fourth day back at school and she found herself lost in thought about the two of them. She was seated on one of the couches in front of the fire supposed to be doing her essay for Transfiguration when Sirius came stumbling in.

She looked up in shock at the sight of him obviously drunk and stumbling. She quickly shot out of her chair and made her way toward him.

"Sirius!" She exclaimed quietly. "What in Merlin's name are you doing?"

He chuckled loudly at her and she threw a silencing spell toward James' door so as not to wake him.

"You're not Prongs." He said grinning madly and leaning against the wall.

"No I'm not." She answered smiling softly.

"You're Prongs' Lily-flower." He cackled falling over and knocking a lamp off of a nearby table.

"And you are very drunk."

He nodded looking up at the ceiling sadly. "It's that time of year."

She nodded pretending to understand but really not sure of what he meant at all.

"Well how about you and I go to my room and I'll see what I can do about getting you sobered up."

Sirius cackled again and shook his head no. "Prongs would kill me. You're his girl. He called you, way back in first year…I would have called you but he saw you first. Told me you were the prettiest girl in Hogwarts and that there was no chance in hell he would relinquish you. I even tried to bribe him with ten or so of the ones on my list but he wouldn't have it. He told me I could have his whole list if I just let him have you."

Lily blushed a little and tried to pull him into a sitting position. "Well I don't think James will mind if I'm just trying to get you sober."

"He has to do it every year. Poor bloke. It's like tradition now." Sirius mumbled rubbing his eyes tiredly.

Lily let him ramble a bit about how often he and James had gone through stupid drunken moments together while Lily ushered him toward her room.

They stepped through the doorway and he looked around in interest.

"Who lives here?"

She grinned, "The head girl."

"Ohhh…nice digs." He said stumbling toward her couch.

Lily conjured up some water for him and told him to drink it. He did so obediently before saying carefully. "I ruined it all you know."

"Ruined what?" She said sitting next to him on the couch.

"Any chance I ever had with her I ruined the second I slept with that other girl. I still can't remember her name… James can though. He remembers what girl I screwed up with." Sirius said tiredly.

"Well I'm sure that if you just tell her you feel like you screwed up…" Lily trailed off as Sirius began to shake his head.

"No…I knew then and I know now that I'm not good enough to touch her." He said firmly. "She's just too damn good for me."

Lily began to understand what exactly it was Sirius was talking about. In their fourth year Marlene had developed a huge crush on him and she'd been truly disappointed when he'd dated every girl he could get his hands on except her. Obviously Sirius had a little more emotionally invested in the situation than Lily had thought as well.

"I think that's probably something you should let her decide." She replied.

"That's what James says." Sirius groaned rubbing his head. "He says that we'll never really feel good enough for the women we want. We just have to hope that they'll want us despite that."

She was about to say something to him when he suddenly turned rather green. Grabbing him by the hand she tugged him out of her room and toward the bathroom. As he retched into the toilet she grabbed up a wash cloth and wetted it.

A long while later he lay back against the wall in misery as Lily washed his face with the cloth. She smiled in amusement as she realized that not only did Sirius speak in complete sentences when he was drunk but that he also became rather affectionate.

"You're the best Evans." He said smiling and squeezing her waist tightly.

"So I've been told." She said grinning as it was the fourth time he'd mentioned it already.

He leaned over and kissed her cheek before leaning his head back against the wall and closing his eyes again.

"James loves you. Did you know that?" He muttered tiredly. "If he were here he would agree with me…he does though. He's told me like a million times. He really really loves you."

Lily was silent and Sirius cracked his eyes open at her. "You love him too. I know it. Cause if you didn't life just wouldn't make sense. A guy like James has to get a happy ending you know?"

She nodded in understanding and then rushed to hold the cloth to his forehead as he leaned forward to vomit again.

They were still in that position Lily holding the rag to Sirius' forehead and helping to support him when she looked up to see a groggy James enter the doorway.

His eyes widened in shock as he saw them and he moved forward instantly.

"Merlin Lily, I'm sorry. I totally forgot what day it was. I just…How is he?"

Lily tore her eyes away from a bare-chested James and said softly, "He's going to feel a lot better once he gets most of that mess out of his system."

James nodded and came to sit up against the cupboards next to the toilet, so that Sirius sat vomiting with Lily on his right and James on his left. Once he was able to sit back again Sirius looked at James and smiled.

"Prongs…you showed up! I knew you'd make it, you always do." He said giddily.

"I'm here mate." James said grinning in brotherly affection at Sirius.

"Are you feeling any better?" Lily asked him moving to take his hand in hers.

Sirius nodded dramatically and Lily grinned. "Well that's good."

"Hey James, I was just telling Lily that you love her." He said turning his head to his best friend and chuckling as he slid down the wall to lay flat on the tile. "Tell her I'm right. Tell her that you say it all the time."

James flushed crimson and said softly, "Some other time Padfoot."

"Kay…but don't wait too long. Opportunity comes but rarely my friend." He said tiredly. "You shouldn't let it pass you by."

James chuckled as Sirius fell instantly into sleep after that and he turned to Lily his stare piercing.

"Thankyou for taking care of him. I'm sorry I wasn't up when he got here I just…completely forgot that it was, well…you know." He said his voice somewhat rough.

"Ya, I sort of figured out what he was so upset about." She replied carefully. "You know she still holds a candle for him too right? You know that if he would just make a move she'd be thrilled."

James nodded. "I've sort of always suspected that. I just don't know if there is any way to convince him that she feels that way."

He snorted and then added. "And even if you did convince him I'm sure he would give you the same silly reasons he gave me about not being good enough for her."  
Lily nodded. "That's a hard feeling to overcome." She all but whispered keeping her gaze pinned to the floor.

James shot her a look of confusion and said, "Are you saying you feel that way?"

She began to trace the pattern in the tile on the floor. "Sometimes."  
"I feel the same you know." He said seriously. "Nearly all the time." He rubbed a hand through his hair nervously before saying, "I can't imagine why you would feel that way."

Lily shrugged. "I feel that way when I start to think about how many girls in this school would kill to have you give them attention. Or when I think of what an absolutely brilliant wizard you are. Or when I think about the fact that you're a Pureblood and I'm a…"

"Don't." He ordered shaking his head. "Don't let them make you think that blood matters in any way at all whatsoever. Because it doesn't. It has nothing to do with you and me. With my feelings for you. And you shouldn't let it influence your feelings either."

She nodded letting the words sink in and then went on. "I feel that way when I think about the fact that you are extremely rich and I'm middle class by definition. I feel that way when I look at you and realize that you are the most handsome guy I've ever seen."

James shook his head blushing at her words. "All of that is nonsense Lily. All of those things could be turned back around about you. I've had to chase guys away from you for years now. You're a brilliant witch, sometimes downright scary if I'm being honest. And you're incredibly beautiful…stunning actually."

She looked up to see his eyes were roaming over her and that they were smoldering in appreciation.

"You forgot the part about my being middle-class." She mumbled quietly, trying to keep her composure.

"That's because it was insignificant. Money shouldn't make a difference. So my family has a lot of it, why is that important? So does Sirius' family and I wouldn't want to be associated with that lot if they were my last option for social interaction in the world."

Lily grinned at his words and then shrugged. "It doesn't mean anything to you because you have it. To me it's…intimidating to say the least." She explained honestly. "I'm not used to the society that you live in. To the standards that you've grown up with."

"So we find a balance somewhere in between what you are used to and what I'm used to." He said mimicking her earlier shrug. "You don't think I'm intimidated by parts of your life. I've no clue what half the things in the Muggle world are even about. I made an idiot of myself just drinking that Coke this summer." He chuckled. "I'm worried I'll make a million mistakes if I ever meet your family."

"They would like you." She said honestly. "At least my parents would. Petunia doesn't like much of anything that's associated with me. So she'll probably hate you on principle."

James smiled softly. "Good to know."

"Do you really think we can make it work James? You and me?"

He nodded, looking at her intently. "Yes."

"Even with us being so different? From such different worlds?"

He sighed and slid across the bathroom floor, pushing himself up and over Sirius' legs, until he was seated right in front of her. He grabbed both her hands in his as he thought through what he wanted to say.

"Look I know it feels like a big deal to you, but you've got to get past our backgrounds Lily. We can't change them and we shouldn't have to. I care about you…I want the chance to be with you. I don't care about the rest of it. Pureblood, half-blood, Muggleborn…it doesn't make any difference to me." He explained running his thumbs along the backs of her hands. "My parents raised me to make my own choices about people. I wasn't brought up with the usual prejudices that most people of my sort are and I'm intelligent enough to know when something is foolish and unfounded."

He looked up into her eyes and Lily smiled at the sincerity she saw there.

"I've liked you for a long time Lily Evans. I've changed a lot about myself in the past year or so to be more what you need. I'm intent on getting my shot at happiness with you. And in order to do that, I need you to forget that I'm a Pureblood and you're a Muggleborn and to focus instead on the fact that I'm a guy and you're a girl and that there's something here between us."

She sat staring back at him for awhile processing it all and going over everything that they'd shared together. The time he'd spent letting her get to know him, adjusting to the idea that he wasn't the jerk she had thought. All the times he'd been there, the things he'd said to her and the things that she'd said back. It all added up to now. To them sitting on the floor in the Head's bathroom, with a passed out Sirius next to them as Lily was forced to come to a decision about the two of them.

She smiled finally and stood up from the floor. James rose with her and quirked an eyebrow at her questioningly.

"We have patrol tomorrow night." She told him biting her lip. "You can ask me again then?"

James frowned as she moved away stepping over Sirius' prone form to get to the door.

"Ask you what?"

"You'll figure it out." She said cheekily. "Afterall it used to be your favorite question."

Lily smiled as she shut the door and a moment later heard James' laugh. Good he'd figured it out then. Now all she had to do was make it through the next day without talking herself out of it.


	18. Chapter 18

**Author's Note: **

**! 100+ Reviews ! I'm so excited thank you all for being so great and letting me know what you thought of this story! I love checking in and seeing that someone has left me a review! You have all been so great I really can't tell you how much I enjoy hearing from you! So THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU!**

**I'm going to keep this note short cause I'll probably be updating again very very soon as I've already got the next chapter done :) But I really hope you all enjoy this one and as always please please please keep reviewing and letting me know what you think!**

**CHAPTER 18**

**A CHANCE AT LOVE**

James wasn't sure how he'd managed to get Sirius down to breakfast the next morning but somehow he'd done it and he found himself grinning as his best friend groaned loudly at the sight of so much activity.

"Bloody hell James, why couldn't you just let me rot in peace?" He growled irritably.

"Because, you need to have Remus make you a hangover remedy and then you've got to get to class and help me make it through the next twelve plus hours before Lily and I have to patrol at ten."

Sirius scowled at him. "And why may I ask are you going to have trouble making it until then?"

"Because she gave me permission to ask her out tonight on patrol and I'm damned close to not making it 'til then." He responded as nonchalantly as he could.

"Oh Merlin I think I'm still drunk." Sirius moaned grabbing his head in his hands, marching more determinedly toward their friends. "I thought you just told me Lily gave you permission to ask her out."

James chuckled as he followed his friend to the Gryffindor table where everyone was already seated. He dropped into his place next to Lily and did his best not to just grab her and ask her right then.

"Moony I need…"

"I already have it right here." Remus said interrupting Sirius as he handed over his hangover remedy.

Sirius downed it and sighed in relief. He gave Remus a thankful look as he turned back to James who was wolfing down mass portions of food at a record pace and doing his best not to look at the red-head seated next to him.

"Oh Merlin you weren't kidding earlier were you?" Sirius said realizing James was extremely frazzled.

James paused long enough to shake his head no at Sirius before devoting his attention to his food again. It was a moment before he caught sight of what Lily was eating for breakfast.

He began to choke violently as he accidentally inhaled sharply. Sirius was thumping him on the back rather forcefully a moment later as he felt like he was coughing up his lungs.

"For the love of Helga Hufflepuff James! Get a grip…" Sirius muttered, his hand hitting his friends back with a loud 'thwack'. "I can't be rescuing you from yourself all day long…."

As James recovered enough to take a long drink of water, Lily's voice reached him.

"Alright there Potter?" She asked her tone slightly worried.

James nodded and turned to her suddenly. He looked down at the plate in front of her to be sure he hadn't imagined it…sure enough there was a huge stack of pancakes smothered in strawberries in front of her. He grinned madly.

"Pancakes Lils?" He said excitedly.

Before she could answer he leaned forward and kissed her soundly on the mouth. It was quick and over before she could really react but he'd done it none the less. In the Great Hall for any one who happened to be watching to see.

James jumped up from the table and grabbing a random assortment of muffins and apples and throwing them in his bag he pulled Sirius up by hooking an arm around his chest and dragged him away from the table, shooting a significant look at Remus and Peter as he began to march away, leaving a stunned Lily behind.

"Proooongs…my bacon!" Sirius whined pathetically stumbling along backwards as his friend towed him away. "Moony grab the bacon!"

Remus rolled his eyes but grabbed up a napkin full of bacon before he and Peter stood and made to follow their friends from the Great Hall.

Lily looked at after them in shock as the foursome disappeared through the huge double doors.

"What on earth…" She muttered thoroughly confused by James' behavior.

She looked around to see that a few people had seen him kiss her and were even now staring at her and whispering to the person next to them. She nearly groaned aloud at the sight.

"Care to explain what that was all about?" Alice asked curiously, her eyes alight with interest.

Lily sighed as she thought it over. Before long she was fighting a smirk.

"I think James is nervous."

Her friends all looked intrigued and Lily smiled as she bent down to explain what had happened the night before, minus a drunken Sirius.

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"Prongs!" Sirius growled as James towed him into the nearest empty classroom. "Couldn't you have gotten a hold of your sanity long enough for the rest of us to enjoy our breakfast? I was just about to….Oh sweet Merlin Moony I love you!"

Remus chuckled as he handed over the large handful of bacon he'd brought along to his friend.

As Sirus sat down on the nearest desk to enjoy his food Remus and Peter turned to James their looks expectant.

James grinned. "She was having pancakes. Do you know what that means?"

They both shook their heads, looking at James as if he'd lost his mind.

"It means she's going to say yes." He stated as if that were obvious, and then added slightly less enthusiastically, "I think."

"Yes to what?" Peter questioned in confusion.

"To me." James said leaning back against the large desk at the front of the classroom. "When I ask her out tonight."

As their friend stared off into space as if it were a dreamland Peter and Remus exchanged amused glances.

"And how does Lily eating pancakes mean that she's going to say yes to going out with you?" Remus put in chuckling lightly.

"Because they are mental." Sirius said through a mouthful of bacon. "Nothing either of them does ever makes any sense."

James smiled at him still overly euphoric from the happenings at breakfast.

"She's going to say yes. I'm almost sure of it. First she told me to ask her, and now she is eating pancakes. All signs point to yes. Now I just have to figure out _how_ to ask her." James said his expression suddenly turning worried.

Sirius chuckled. "I know exactly what you should say."

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By dinner that night Lily was nearly freaking out. James had huddled up with Sirius in all their classes and while they had exchanged a few words here and there they mostly kept to themselves that day. It had turned out to be the worst situation Lily could have created for herself. It gave her all day long to think about the fact that she'd basically told James Potter he should ask her out that night. Who did that? She was a complete idiot. You didn't just tell the guy that you decided you liked that he should ask you out. You were supposed to let him make that decision. So that you could act all shy and surprised and excited and…

Shit this was bad. She was very near to hyperventilating. What was he going to say now? '_Hi Lily so here I am asking you out like you told me I should_!' Merlin help her she had been daft to come up with this.

"Are you alright Lils? You've gotten rather quiet." Dorcas noted as they took their seats at the Gryffindor table.

"No I'm not. I'm rather light-headed and sweaty and I don't feel so…" She trailed off as she noticed the Marauders arrive.

"Shit." She breathed softly and her friends exchanged amused glances as they followed her line of sight.

Lily was flat out panicking by the time James sat next to her. She wanted to take back what she'd said the night before and then again she didn't, that would just make it worse. She had no idea how to handle the situation and now he was sitting next to her and she was…going to faint.

"Lils!" Alice said suddenly snapping her out of her panicked thoughts and forcing her to remember to breathe.

"Huh," she mumbled lamely.

"I swear I've been trying to get your attention for…"

"Don't do it!"

Lily wasn't really aware that she'd turned to James and shouted loudly at him until after she'd already done it. Everyone around them had fallen silent as anyone within twenty some odd feet of them had heard her scream at him.

He looked at her in complete confusion, "Don't do what?"

"What I told you to do!" She said shrilly.

"What?"

"Last night!" She blurted. "Don't do what I told you to do last night!"

He frowned at her before his eyebrows went up suddenly as he realized what she was talking about.

"You don't want me to?" He asked softly, very aware that her volume level had created an audience for them.

"Yes…I mean no…I mean I want you to because you want to not because I told you to, because you should do what you want when you want to and not when I tell you to." She rambled reaching out to grab his left hand and grip it tightly.

"Lils, don't you think this is what I want? We've talked about this." He said reaching out to take her other hand into his. "I've been excited all day thinking about it. I…"

She stopped him by blurting out suddenly. "Then ask me."

"What?" He looked at her obviously baffled beyond belief by her behavior.

"I can't take how nervous I am. I'm a wreck. I can't focus, or breathe, or feel my toes. I was fine this morning…looking forward to it even but the closer it gets the more panicked I'm getting." She explained her voice shaking in response to her frazzled state. "So just ask me. Please."

"Here?" He said awkwardly noting their rapidly growing audience as more and more people fell silent around them.

"Here, somewhere else, I don't care just ask me now please. So I can say yes and…"

James stood suddenly and pulled her up with him, wrapping his arms around her and crushing her to his chest. "Are you saying yes then?"

"To what? You haven't asked me anything." She stated looking at him as if he were the crazy one.

James was grinning like mad and Lily couldn't understand why he seemed so ruddy pleased.

"What on earth are you smiling about?" She said breathlessly, scowling up at him. "You shouldn't be so bloody happy and composed. I'm near to fainting because I've worked myself up into a state of absolute panic because I was stupid and told you that I want you to ask me what you used to."

"I didn't think that was stupid." He said still smiling down at her with a look of pure happiness.

"Well it was." She replied, so focused on James that she had yet to notice that they were making a spectacle of themselves in the Great Hall. "It was stupid because it gave me all day to dwell on the fact that girls shouldn't tell guys to ask them things like that. They are supposed to just wait and let it happen. I'm an idiot though and I have no idea what I'm doing. So now I need you to ask me…that is if you still want to…because I can't wait any longer or else I'll probably hyperventilate and then I'll have to do this all over again tomorrow because I passed out."

James chuckled suddenly and grabbing her right hand up again he began to tow her quickly out of the Great Hall. Their friends called out disappointedly as they moved away and Lily shot them a look of complete confusion having forgotten they were even there.

"Damn it Potter! That was just getting really good!" Marlene called out as they made their way toward the big double doors.

"I'll owl you the details McKinnon." James called back teasingly as he disappeared still towing a flustered Lily out of the Great Hall.

"Damn. She must really be falling for him." Dorcas said smiling at the whole ordeal.

"Oh she is." Sirius said matter of factly. "They'll be married before we know it and producing ridiculously talented children."

"You really think so?" Marlene asked him eyeing the spot where their friends had disappeared curiously.

Sirius nodded solemnly. "If I know anything about James it's that he won't stop until he gets what he wants or dies trying. And what he wants more than he's ever wanted anything, is Lily Evans."

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James towed Lily through one passageway after another taking every short-cut he knew until they reached the portrait of Sven the Strong-hearted.

He muttered the password then began to shove Lily up the stairs ahead of him.

Once they were in the dormitory he forced himself to take a moment to collect his thoughts. Lily had, after stumbling into the common room ahead of him, turned about and pinned him with a look that was both anticipatory and worried at the same time.

Looking at her James couldn't help but be momentarily lost for words. She was so damned beautiful it made him ache. The collar of her white school shirt was flipped out a bit and the gray sweater vest she had on over it was slightly skewed. Her hair was down but uncharacteristically tousled looking as if she'd been running her hands through it in frustration all day. Her full bottom lip was between her teeth and her hands were balled into fists at her sides.

It was her eyes that had him pinned to the spot however. He took a deep breath, realizing that he was moments away from asking Lily Evans to go out with him for what could possibly be the last time.

He took an uncertain step toward her and then suddenly his feet were moving swiftly and he was in front of her.

"Lily Evans…" He breathed trying to remember all the things he'd planned on saying. In the end all he managed was, "…I've waited ages to be able to ask you this question again and I swear to do my best to be everything you'll ever need if you give me the chance. It would make me incredibly, ridiculously happy if you would agree to be my girlfriend. Will you go out with me?"

There was an incredibly full moment in which he realized the words had been said and she processed them.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" She asked shakily. "You're sure about me?"

James nodded his stomach doing a serious of strange somersaults as he waited for her to answer him.

Then suddenly she was in his arms.

"Yes James." She breathed roughly. "Yes."

It felt rather dreamlike as he laughed happily and picked her up to carry her to the couch. He placed her on his lap and just savored the moment for a little while.

"So we are Lily and James now?" She said breaking the silence and smiling at him.

He noticed she looked rather relieved now that the whole asking ordeal was over with.

"Yes." He said grinning widely back at her. "It doesn't really feel real yet though."

"I know what you mean. All day long I began to dread you asking me out and now it seems rather silly of me. It was so easy to say yes."

James felt warm at her words. He squeezed her waist lightly and realized suddenly that he could. That he was now allowed to hold her and kiss her and…his brain had frozen on the idea of kissing her and his grin turned impish as he leaned forward and captured her lips with his own.

He smiled against her mouth when she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back warmly. It was all the invitation he needed. Cupping her head in his hand he kissed her deeply.

The most amazing thing he'd ever experienced was kissing Lily Evans. The feelings it caused in him, the way it made every inch of him flare to life, he'd never known anything like it and he didn't think he ever would.

For a long time she was the only thing that registered. Her lips, her hands teasing his hair, the way she leaned into him leaving her breasts only inches from being pressed up against him. He groaned when his thoughts began to take his hormones into overdrive and pulled away from her slowly.

"You have no idea how happy I am." He said grinning so widely it hurt his cheeks.

"I think I have a pretty good notion of what you're feeling." She said grinning back just as widely.

They sat and started at each other for a moment without speaking both absorbing the feeling of finally being together.

"Is it strange?" Lily asked finally.

"What?"

"Not having to ask me out anymore." She giggled.

James smirked, "You have no idea. It's ridiculously strange to think you actually said yes. I mean this morning I sort of guessed that you would but now that you actually have I'm just sort of…in shock I suppose. I mean I actually get to say you're my girlfriend now. That feels.." he took a deep breath and smiled in wonder, "amazing."

She smiled and began to play with the hair at the nape of his neck. He leaned up and kissed her softly once more before pulling back to look at her intently.

"Lily." He said staring into green eyes that were alive with desire and happiness.

"James." She said softly when he didn't go on.

"My Lily." He said grinning like mad.

She laughed at the look of wonder on his face as he realized that for the first time the words were very true. She was his.

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That night as they returned from doing rounds, Lily found herself feeling as if she'd taken some kind of pepper-up potion that produced extreme euphoria. She was energetic and playful and James was obviously on the same thing she was.

He was touching her the entire time. His hand gripped hers, or he put his arm around her shoulders or he was tickling her as they checked a room full of statuary for out of bed students.

As they entered their portrait hole she made to head to her room but he pulled her to a stop and brought his mouth down on hers. Lily's insides raced with excitement. Kissing James was the most intense thing she had ever felt. It made something inside of her jump to life, some part of her that she hadn't known existed until he'd come along and awakened it within her.

That part of her hummed in happiness as he laid claim to her mouth, exploring her with a newfound intensity that had her knees feeling weak.

"Mmm James." She said, gripping him for balance and pulling away. "This might be a problem."

"What's that?" He said throatily tightening his grip on her waist and moving his lips to her jaw line.

"This. I don't know how I'm supposed to make it through tomorrow when all I can think about right now is kissing you." She admitted her voice trailing to a whisper as he bent further and his kisses moved to her throat.

She felt him grin against her skin after she gasped when his lips connected with a rather sensitive spot.

"I'm sure we'll manage," he mumbled back. "Just think about how nice it will be to be able to do this whenever we get a chance."

"That's what I'm worried about." She breathed back. "Cause I will probably want to do this with you all day."

"Well how about I kiss you senseless right now so that tomorrow you won't be craving it so much."

"So does that mean we don't have to go to bed right this minute then?" She said throatily loving the feel of him against her neck.

She felt him pause slightly at her words and she pulled back to look at him.

He stood to his full height, which was rather impressive and quirked an eyebrow at her as he said teasingly, "It might be a good idea not to mention bed to me right now."

She flushed crimson instantly, mortified at what her statement had seemed to imply and buried her face in the center of his chest.

"I was only kidding." He said chuckling, wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head. "But to answer your question, no. We definitely don't have to go to…sleep…right now."

He put two fingers under her chin and lifting her eyes to his he said softly, "I for one plan to enjoy every minute of the rest of today with you."

Lily smiled at his words and smirked at him impishly.

"Well I suppose that might depend." She said mock seriously.

"On what?" He said letting her step out of his embrace.

"On whether or not you can catch me." She said quickly, slipping away to run across the common room.

James laughed. "It's not like there's a whole lot of places for you to run to in here Lils. I'm going to catch you before you even get going."

"That would be true…too bad I'm a witch and I don't fight fair." She said grinning cheekily as she twirled her wand between her fingers.

That was all the challenge James needed. He leapt at her.

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"Can you hear anything?" Remus asked quietly.

He looked to where Sirius had his ear pressed against the wall behind which lay Lily and James' common room. They'd performed a complex listening spell that had worked for them dozens of times before when they wanted to hear what someone in the next room was talking about.

"Oh I hear them alright." Sirius said grinning.

"Well what are they saying?" Peter squeaked.

Sirius chuckled and replied, "Do you really want to know?"

The other two nodded and Sirius laughed harder.

"Right now Lily's going…'Oh James! Please! Uhh!' And James is going 'That's what you get you little minx!' and…Hey!" He said sharply frowning as his two friends shoved past him to press their ears against the wall, looks of complete disbelief on their faces.

A moment later both of their eyes widened and they burst out laughing.

"You are such an idiot," Remus told Sirius chuckling in amusement.

"You've got to admit it was pretty funny." Sirius winked. "I just left out the part about her being tickled."

"So I guess this means she said yes." Peter said his tone odd.

"Duh Pete! Like there was any real chance of her saying no." Sirius said ruffling his friends' hair affectionately.

"Come on boys let's leave them to it." Remus said waggling his eyebrows suggestively at the other two as they set off back toward their common room.

"But I thought he was just tickling her." Peter said confusedly.

Sirius and Remus burst out laughing.

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The morning after James asked Lily out they emerged from their dorm with only breakfast in mind.

Lily laughed and pushed James away for what had to be the fifth time already.

"You can't keep kissing me in the corridors." She said her eyes sparkling. "We have to set an example."

"Oh we will." He assured her. "We'll be a prime example of how two people who have just started dating each other should behave."

She shook her head at him but didn't resist when he found yet another alcove to push her into so that he could kiss her again.

They were rather late to breakfast by the time they actually reached the Great Hall. They entered hand in hand and apart from identical expressions of adoration on both their faces, and the slight flush that covered Lily's skin, they acted as if nothing had changed. Moving to sit in their usual seats, they instantly began to pile food onto their plates.

James grinned cockily when Lily reached for the pancakes yet again. She elbowed him playfully in the stomach when he raised his eyebrows at her and he chuckled and turned to reach for the bacon.

It was suddenly pulled out of his reach by an amused looking Sirius.

"You can't have any until you spill." He said smiling.

"What?" James exclaimed in mock affront. "I never thought I'd see the day when my best mate would use bacon against me to get the information he wanted."

"McKinnon told me she'd give me four chocolate frogs if I did it." Sirius admitted instantly.

"I'll make it five."James threw out just as quickly.

"Eight." Sirius countered.

"I'll give you six and a box of chocolate cauldrons."

"Make it seven and throw a box of Droobles in with the cauldrons and you've got a deal."

James stuck out his hand and the two boys shook on it. Sirius was grinning from ear to ear as he handed over the bacon.

"What the hell was that Black?" Marlene said irritably. "You were supposed to get him to tell us what happened."

"He'll tell me later anyway…and now I get sweets too." Sirius winked at her.

"You're pathetic." Marlene snorted.

"But really fucking adorable." Sirius said smirking.

"Language." Lily scolded him smiling at their banter.

"Come on Lils," Alice pleaded. "We all want to know. We can see you said yes. So just fill in the gaps for us."

Lily shrugged her face flushing slightly with embarrassment. "There's not much to tell. We went back to the common room. He asked me. I said yes."

"_How_ did he ask you?" Dorcas insisted. "We want details here."

"Ooh let's make them reenact it." Marlene cooed, her eyes lighting up with excitement.

Lily began to rapidly shake her head no.

"Absolutely not. I know that look. That's the I'm not going to let this go until Lily does exactly what I want her to face and I'm not going to give in. There is no way you are getting me and James to reenact what happened when he asked me out!"

"So just tell us then." Alice insisted.

Lily sighed and looked at James as if to say 'well go ahead'. He grinned at her and then launched into a story that pretty much stuck to the truth until he got to where Lily said yes.

"And then I leaned down and kissed the daylights out of her for..."

"You did not!" She chuckled smacking him lightly on the arm.

"So you're saying I didn't kiss the daylights out of you last night?" He returned grinning madly.

"Well yes you did but…"

"See." He said stopping her. "Now eat your breakfast so that we can leave early for class."

"Why would we want to…" She began and then turned bright red when all of her friends began to laugh at her.

James leaned over and kissed her softly before whispering in her ear. "There are lots of hidden alcoves on the way to the transfiguration classroom."


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: It all belongs to JKR**

**Author's Note:**

**Hello Everyone! Glad you are all still with me! Thankyou all so much for the reviews! I loved each and every one of them! So Thankyou!**

**This chapter is RIDICULOUSLY LONG! Sorry about that... I sort of got carried away and then decided when all was said and done that I was leaving it this way. It never really got to where I loved it but I'm pleased enough with it at this point and i want to keep going so there you have it...I hope you all enjoy it and don't mind the sort of jumbled feel that it has. The next chapter is more together I promise :) And soon things will get more STEAMY between Lily and James. I've got to let them get used to things first though right?**

**Also I know you are all probably going to go where the heck is Snape? in this chapter but I promise I'll get to that as well.**

**Just a Warning: There is a lot of language in this chapter...but honestly that will probably become a pattern in this story eventually so if it offends you I'm sorry that's just the way my imagination wants things to go. **

**Well here we go again.**

**Lots of Love, **

**Valkyrie 3**

**Chapter 19**

**JEALOUSY AND FEAR**

The first week of Lily and James' relationship had brought with it some interesting events. The reactions of some of their teachers had been extremely interesting. Flitwick had fallen off of his stool when they'd walked in and he'd seen James kiss Lily before taking his seat. Slughorn had congratulated James repeatedly on his success at getting Lily to go out with him and had almost seemed as if he viewed James in a better light because Lily had agreed to date him.

The most interesting of the bunch though had been Professor McGonagall. The first time she'd noticed the new development James had his arm slung around Lily's shoulders and had been flirting outrageously with her in the corridor outside the Transfiguration classroom. Lily had of course been flirting back and staring at James in a rather lovesick way.

"Am I to believe that you've finally managed to convince Ms. Evans to accept you as her boyfriend Potter? And that you haven't slipped her some sort of love potion, used the imperius curse, or convinced Mr. Black to take polyjuice potion in an attempt to get a rise out of me?" She'd barked from two feet away.

James had jumped away from Lily and then grinned triumphantly as her words registered.

"That would be correct professor."

McGonagall had looked at him seriously as if she were debating as to whether or not she really believed him.

"Can I give you a word of advice?" She'd said finally.

"Certainly professor." James had grinned cheekily.

"Don't screw up."

James jaw had dropped at her words and it had taken him a more than decent amount of time to regain his composure.

"I.."

"And you have detention." She'd added finally.

That got him going. "For what?"

"For putting your hands on Ms. Evans person in an inappropriate manner." She'd stated sternly.

"But I.."

"Will be in here tomorrow evening at eight sharp. At which time you will be reading and summarizing the text I provide you with and then giving me a detailed report on it at the end of the hour."

James had groaned as the serious woman had disappeared through the doorway muttering something that had sounded vaguely like 'Merlin I need a holiday'.

He'd returned from his detention however with an amused grin on his face.

"How'd it go?" Sirius had asked.

Their friends had all gathered in their common room to play exploding snap.

"It was rather interesting. First she lectured me on how a young man should behave when courting a girl that he likes and then she'd made me read these outdated books on what it means to be a gentleman and how to charm witches while still maintaining propriety. I had to tell her what I'd learned from the books and then she'd made me promise to keep everything in mind in regard to my relationship with Lily."

Sirius had burst out laughing instantly. "You've got to be kidding! Minnie gave you dating advice!"

James nodded his grin mischievous. "You'd be surprised at what she could tell you actually. I feel I've learned a lot of invaluable information tonight."

"Like what?" Sirius demanded his eyebrows drawing together in confusion.

"Just things. All I'm going to say is she knows what she's talking about." James answered shaking his head in amusement. "I just don't ever want to know how or why she learned it all."

Unfortunately their first week of being together wasn't all sunshine and roses.

Lily tried to quell her irritation as best she could. She had never thought of herself as the jealous sort but now she was having to reconsider. Since they'd officially become a couple things had gone from irritating to downright out of line. The first incident took place just after transfiguration on their _first day!_ as a couple. Lydia Rycroft of Hufflepuff had come up to James and had begun to ask him if he had any plans for the first Hogsmead weekend. James had suddenly grinned ridiculously and said loudly.

"Yes actually I'll be spending the day with my girlfriend."

Lydia's eyes had widened and she'd glanced at Lily quickly. "I wasn't aware you were dating anyone."

"Well I am. So I'll be spending the day with Lily. Sorry." He had answered back still grinning madly.

Lydia had nodded and moved away quickly, no doubt to go tell everyone she could about the new development.

"Merlin that feels good." James said rushing over to Lily and pulling her into his arms.

She had laughed and squeezed him affectionately and then they'd gone on to their next class.

Two days later she was ready to curse the next girl who came up to James to ask if he really was dating her. Every single one of them had disbelieving looks on their faces when he had validated the rumors and said yes.

"But she's…"

"Way out of my league." James had said interrupting Sarah Janson when she'd asked him after potions on Thursday. "I know but she's decided to finally give me a shot anyway."

Sarah had huffed and shot an angry glare Lily's way before moving off with a determined stride.

It wasn't what she would have expected out of her first week being James Potter's girlfriend. The notoriety of it was a little more than she had thought it would be and the reactions of the Hogwarts female population were a bit too zealous for her liking.

Now as she stood in the hall outside the charms classroom Lily was really starting to feel annoyed. James was surrounded by a cluster of fifth, sixth and seventh year girls all asking him numerous questions, under the pretense of needing advice from the Head Boy.

"Was it always like this?" Lily asked Marlene bristling irritably.

"Do you mean has James always been adored by hoards of girls here at Hogwarts? Yes. Have they always been so persistent and determined? No. Is it a reaction to the fact that he's finally agreed to date someone? Most likely. Does it make it worse that it's you? Definitely." Marlene answered rapidly as she shoved her charms book into her bag.

"What do you mean it makes it worse that it's me?"

Marlene shrugged. "You've been turning him down for years when the rest of them probably would have cut off their wand arm if they thought it would impress him. So it's a natural reaction for them to feel a bit…miffed."

When a particularly flirty Ravenclaw, who Lily recognized as Jamie Carlson, reached out and put her hand on James chest Lily had enough.

She shoved her way through them until she reached him and pretending she hadn't seen a single one of them reached up and pulled his head down to hers. She kissed him hotly, very aware of the spectacle she was making and not caring in the least.

James wrapped his arms around her instantly and she could feel him smile against her lips.

The problem with kissing James Potter, Lily had realized, was that once you started it was rather difficult to stop. The feel of him, the scent of his skin, the way he held her. It was all so intoxicating that Lily often found she lost track of where she was.

"For Merlin's sake they got the point!" She heard Alice shout from a few feet away.

James pulled away from her and looked over to where Alice stood.

"What?"

"I was telling Lily that they got the point. In case you two hadn't noticed the annoying flock of dimbos vanished about five minutes ago."

Lily suddenly remembered why she'd been kissing James in the first place and she smiled triumphantly. "Good. They need to back off."

James chuckled and squeezed her around the waist tightly. "Is Lily Evans jealous?"

She bit her lip and rolled her eyes as she pulled away from him.

"Perhaps," She admitted.

Smiling widely James snagged her back to him and leaned forward to press his lips to hers again.

"For the love of…Go find a bloody broom cupboard!" Alice shouted at them as she and the rest of their friends strolled away laughing.

Aside from Lily's discovery that she herself was a bit protective of James she also found herself dealing with jealousy from others. The same girls who wanted to verify that James was indeed off the market began to give her dirty looks or whisper snidely whenever she was around. But she also dealt with issues from people she wouldn't have expected. Girls who had been her friends for years from other houses also began to treat her just slightly coldly as if they were a tad bit upset with her.

"I don't get it." She said to her friends as they exited the Transfiguration classroom. "Candace Lockwood and I have always gotten on."

They'd left the four Marauders, who were once again facing detention from McGonagall and no doubt receiving yet another lecture from the stern woman right at that very moment, behind as they made their way toward their next class.

Dorcas shrugged, "She's a right cow if she's upset because you and James finally got together."

"I don't think she's a cow. I've always liked her, I still do. It's just…I don't really appreciate her looking at me as if I'm doing something wrong." Lily protested.

"Look Lils, a lot of people are probably going to take issue with you and James. The most likely are going to be the people who felt like you two getting together ruined their chances with one of you." Marlene explained. "And I know you've already realized this but there were a lot of girls secretly, and not so secretly, harboring feelings for James. Candice is probably just feeling a little put out."

Lily shook her head. "It didn't seem like that's what it was. It seemed like she…disapproved. Like she was judging me."

"Judging you." Dorcas echoed. "What do you mean?"

"I'm not sure how to explain it. It didn't seem like she was upset that I had taken James. It was more like she was upset that I was with James in general."

As they rounded the corner pondering Lily's words the girls came face to face with a group of Slytherin boys all looking predatorily at the sight of the four Gryffindors.

"How's it going there Evans?" Mulicber, who was their unofficial ringleader, called out loudly enough for everyone nearby in the corridor to hear. "Giving Potter his money's worth?"

His friends all chuckled gleefully at her expense and Lily did her damndest not to look and see if Sev was among them. She flushed crimson but continued on.

"Shut your filthy mouth Mulciber!" Marlene bit back.

"Don't get me started on you McKinnon," Mulciber called back, "Between you and Prewett over there it's hard to determine which is the bigger blood traitor."

"You can take your blood purity nonsense and shove it up your…"

"Alice!" Lily screeched yanking on her friends arm to get her to turn about. "Just leave it alone."

"Fuck that Lily. They need someone to stand up to them." Alice bit back, craning her neck to keep her eyes on Mulciber and his cronies.

"I agree but you can't be doing things when I'm around. I'm the Head Girl now remember? I'm supposed to discourage any kind of bad behavior." Lily said her voice low.

As they moved away Mulciber called out again, "Hey Mudblood! When you get tired of Potter let me know, I'd be willing to have a go at his goods!"

Lily was knocked sideways as Marlene shoved past her to get back to where the Slytherins all stood.

"You son of a bitch!" She fumed, marching up to him and socking him in the face before he had time to react.

Unfortunately for Marlene an unsympathetic Professor Trygvasson had witnessed the entire thing and awarded both she and Mulciber a weeks worth of detention.

Throughout their next lesson Lily's friends were fuming and by the time they were let out she had a monstrous headache from trying to get them to calm down.

The four Marauders were completely confused as to what was going on and as they sat down to dinner the questions began.

"What happened?" Sirius said looking at Marlene. "We showed up in Defense and you were all…"  
"Those fucking, foul-mouthed, son of a bitch, bastard Slytherins happened!" Marlene answered back hotly before he could finish his sentence. "I swear if I hear Mulciber say one more thing about Lily I'm going to…"

"Wait a minute! Slow down." Sirius insisted catching her hand and tugging on her gently. "Breathe a little okay. Now slowly and without so many curse words, as I'm sure your mother raised you to be a lady, tell me what happened."

Marlene narrowed her eyes at him for trying to be funny but did as she was told and took a few deep breaths.

"We were walking to Defense and when we turned the corner Mulciber and that lot were there. That prat called out to Lily to ask her if she was giving James his…"

"Can we just stop!" Lily broke in pleadingly. "All this is going to do is get them angry and then they are going to do something stupid just like they always do. And then I'm going to be upset because they are going to get in trouble and…"  
"Whoa there," James broke in putting an arm around her and pulling her to him. "Calm down. There's nothing to get worked up about, we haven't even heard the story yet."

Lily sighed. "But I know you. Once you hear it you're going to be upset. Then you'll likely do something that isn't going to help the situation in the least."

"How about we hear the story and then we'll see if you're right." He answered back grinning at her unabashedly and not denying her claims at all.

"I already know I'm right." She muttered tiredly.

James looked to Marlene and signaled for her to continue.

"So anyway he calls out to Lily to ask her if she's been giving James his money's worth. What an asshole right? So I yelled back at him, told him to shut his mouth. Then he made some comment about how he didn't know who was a bigger blood traitor me or Alice. So Alice went to tell him he could shove his blood purity bullshit up his arse, but Lily stopped her and we were just going to walk away when that stupid fecking moron just had to open his mouth again."

Sirius was nodding along with her story and rubbing circles on her back soothingly as she talked. "What did he say?"

"He said for Lily to let him know when she got tired of James because he wouldn't mind having a go at James' goods." Marlene stated her eyes flashing. "So I turned around and called him a son of a bitch and punched him….where are you going?"

Sirius and James had stood up at the same time and were both glaring daggers toward the Slytherin table.

"I told you they would do this." Lily moaned burying her face in her hands.

James leaned down and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

"Don't worry love I'm just gonna go have a little chat with them."

"Oh sure, like I'm going to believe that."

James just smiled, without any humor in his eyes and looked to Sirius who was looking down at Marlene.

"You said you punched him?" He questioned.

She nodded and he reached out to pick up her hand, examining it and nodding when he saw the slight bruising around her knuckles. He leaned down and kissed them softly and then looked at James, and the two boys moved off toward the Slytherin table.

Remus sighed and got up to follow them, followed swiftly by Peter.

"I knew they were going to react this way." Lily grumbled lifting her head out of her hands to watch the happenings worriedly.

But it turned out she needn't have bothered because before the four boys could make it to the Slytherin table Professor McGonagall had intercepted them and somehow managed to get them to retake their seats amongst the girls.

"We'll just have to _talk_ with them later, won't be boys?" Sirius said irritably reaching for the pumpkin juice.

"Definitely." James answered back before turning his gaze to Lily.

She looked tired and somewhat annoyed. He smiled softly and brushed her hair back behind her ear.

"Want to go up and go to sleep?"

She looked up at him thankfully and nodded.

"Did you eat anything?" He questioned, motioning toward the food at the table.

She shook her head.

"To the kitchens it is then, we'll take it to go." He stood up pulling her from the table and ignoring the amused looks he was receiving from his friends he wrapped his arm about her and steered her out of the Great Hall.

"James." She said softly as they exited the double doors. "Please don't go doing something stupid. You know that lot are trouble. I don't want you making people angry on my account."

He pulled her close and kissed the top of her head.

"Don't worry about it." He stated evasively. "Just forget them."

"They're kind of hard to forget when they're insulting me."

James looked down at her and said teasingly, "They're just jealous. Mulciber keeps trying to proposition you while still making it sound like he's being insulting. Honestly I think he's terribly upset that you're now taken."

Lily couldn't help herself, she laughed outright at the absurdity of it.

"That's rich. Mulciber jealous because you're dating me."

"Who wouldn't be? I've managed to convince the most wanted girl in Hogwarts to be my girlfriend." James continued grinning at her cheekily. "And in about fifteen minutes I'm going to spend a fair amount of time trying to get into her knickers."

Lily's laughter echoed throughout the corridor.

00000000000

A month later, Lily sat staring out the window her mind turning over everything that had happened since the start of term.

She had never been so happy in her entire life. James was so many things that she'd never expected. He was patient and understanding and he knew when to make her laugh and when to let her be. He gave her space and time with her friends but he also made her feel completely cared for and wanted. He was becoming so much to her in such a short time that she felt she wasn't able to keep up with her own feelings. It was strange to her to think about how things would have turned out if she had been too stubborn to really give him a shot. To think that the same James Potter who she had pegged as an arrogant, bullying, toerag was the very same James Potter that she was beginning to view as one of the most honorable, genuine, charming guys she'd ever met.

They hadn't done more than snog heavily and yet she felt connected to him in a way she wouldn't have guessed. The way he kissed her and held her and looked at her was a constant reminder of his feelings toward her. She just had a hard time accepting that his feelings were well and truly real and that he was serious about her.

"James." She began one evening as they sat in their common room doing homework together. He looked up at her and she bit her lip nervously. "Do you think that you'll get tired of me eventually?"

"Of course not." He answered instantly.

Lily sighed at his lack of thought over the subject.

"But how do you know?"

"Lily I've been after you for years without really giving another girl the time of day and I haven't grown tired yet. What would make you think that I would now that I've actually got you all to myself?"

She shrugged. "I don't know."

He rolled his eyes and reached for her pulling her over to him and across his lap.

"I'm not going to get tired of you Lily." He reassured her. "Not ever."

She had sighed in happiness when his lips had met hers.

Apart from her occasional worries about their relationship, things had continued to be great between them. When they weren't in class, studying or spending time with their friends they were usually all over each other.

"So I suppose this is just another perk to dating a Marauder?" Lily questioned breathlessly as James lips moved over her neck.

They were hidden away in a private nook that was hidden behind a tapestry on the third floor and James had been demonstrating just how much he had missed her while she'd been spending time with her friends earlier that day.

"Mmmm." He replied throatily his right hand reaching down to grab the skin of her thigh that was revealed by her skirt.

Lily sighed and tangled her hands in his hair as he continued his ministrations along her throat. When his lips had met hers again he'd reached down with his left hand to grip her other thigh and pick her up swiftly. She emitted a startled shriek at the sudden movement and James had grinned against her lips.

"It's easier when we are closer to the same height." He rasped.

"So I've noticed." She giggled her lips closing over his again.

Despite all their heavy snogging James hadn't once made Lily feel as if they should be doing more. Something for which she was thankful as she wasn't really sure about what other aspects of their physical relationship might entail and she wasn't ready to move forward in that way yet anyway.

After the initial flurry of excitement over their relationship had died down, people began to revert back to their old mutterings about his being a Pureblood and her being Muggleborn. It didn't help that the daily prophet continued to deliver news about attacks on muggles and muggleborns and their families. Every morning Lily dreaded the sight of the newspapers being delivered as they increasingly brought awful news.

"I can't believe this." Alice had exclaimed one morning. "They are killing people outright now and the ministry is still acting as if it's a series of awful accidents or isolated incidents."

"They'll do that until he comes forward and openly declares himself and his intentions." Sirius had responded.

"But how can they ignore the fact that the majority of people who are being hurt are Muggles and Muggleborns. Not to mention the fact that numerous wizarding families have come forward and said they've been threatened. The ministry is going about this all the wrong way." Alice sighed.

"They'll wise up soon. My dads been talking about what's been going on in his letters. He says a lot of people are getting into the minister's ear about Voldemort. He thinks it won't be long now before they make an announcement about it all. A few months maybe. Right now the Aurors are doing everything they can to keep people safe and to try and apprehend his followers." James had informed them.

As the days passed Lily often wondered about how James was feeling now that it was becoming more and more obvious that Voldemort had a vendetta against non-Pureblood witches and wizards. She knew he hated the idea of her being targeted but there wasn't much either of them could do while they were still in school. She also knew it couldn't be easy for him knowing that people were talking behind his back about his relationship with her. James had always been well liked and popular and people had always said good things about him. Now he was the subject of dozens of conversations and the things people were saying weren't always good.

Lily had realized the meaning behind the hostility she was receiving from girls like Candace Lockwood when the girl had outright told her she was being selfish one day in Transfiguration.

Lily was focusing on her reflection in the small mirror she'd been given as she tried to transfigure her facial features. She'd looked up to show Alice how she'd narrowed her nose and was startled to see Candace next to her instead.

"Alice went to show Sebastian her eyes." She informed Lily her tone flat.

"Oh, alright." Lily had answered feeling awkward around the girl who had once been very friendly to her but was now rather cold.

"Look I came over here because I felt like I needed to say this to you. I think what you're doing with James is wrong. You're putting him in an awful position you know?" Candace provided.

"I don't understand. You think my being with James is wrong?" Lily had asked frowning.

"Yeah I do. He's a Pureblood, from a good family. The Potters have always been prominent in the wizarding community and what you're doing is only going to make James look bad."

"What exactly is it that I'm doing?" Lily asked.

"You're putting him at the center of the gossip mills. People are talking about how he's making an awful mistake by dating you when so much is going on. There are a lot of people who don't approve of the relationship. With someone like him dating someone like you." Candace went on. "You're being selfish being with him right now. It's only going to make things more difficult for him and his family."

"So what exactly would you like me to do?" Lily bit out scathingly. "I'm not going to break up with a guy I care about, who cares about me just because people can't accept something different than what they're used to."

"I'm just telling you what I think. I like James, my family has known his a long time. I just think that if you really cared about him, you'd leave him alone for now. If things are meant to be then it will all work out later, when things aren't so difficult for people like you." Candace finished, moving away to rejoin her friends across the classroom.

Lily had looked over to where James sat laughing with Sirius over the way they'd made their eyebrows grow. Looking at him made her stomach flip over excitedly and her pulse pound in anticipation. Was it really so selfish of her to be with him?

She obviously hadn't given what it would mean for him to be with her enough thought before she'd said yes. She had known people looked down on people like her who had no real magical background. She just hadn't realized the impact his association with her would have on him. How people would look at him differently because he was with her.

Was she being selfish?

The thought kept playing itself over and over again in her head. The only thing that had finally managed to silence it was James. That night as they'd returned to the common room from dinner he'd pulled her into is arms and kissed her with so much fervor her toes had curled.

When she'd gone to bed that night it had been with thoughts of how much she cared about him and how whether or not it meant she was selfish she didn't want to give up what she'd only just managed to find with him.

For a while things had stayed wonderful between them but after weeks of horrid news and whispers of dark happenings in the magical community, things escalated to a point that they went awfully between her and James one day. Lily had been digging through a cupboard under one of the planter's and had overheard Lionel Diggory talking with one of his Hufflepuff housemates, Michael Finch, one afternoon in Herbology and what they'd been saying had turned her stomach.

"They're saying they killed Kyle Dorset. You remember him? He was a seventh year when we were in fourth. He was a Pureblood but he married Evelyn Ryley, that Muggleborn." Lionel said quietly to his friend. "They say You-Know-Who tortured them before he killed them. My dad says he heard they offered to spare Kyle if he would join up with them. He refused."

"I can't believe it! He was a Pureblood. They've been leaving us alone so far." His friend answered worriedly.

"It looks like they've taken a new turn. My dad says anyone who isn't a Pureblood is in jeopardy now. And so are any Purebloods who associate with those who aren't." Lionel continued.

"But what about all the half-bloods?" Michael questioned.

"My dad and brother say they aren't the primary target right now. And neither are Pureblood's like Kyle yet. That seems to be an isolated incident. They say right now it's more about getting rid of anyone without magical heritage. But they think they'll move on to half-bloods and blood-traitors next."

Michael sighed and shook his head sadly.

"I don't know what to think about all this. My parents don't know what side to take or whether or not to take sides at all. It doesn't help that the ministry keeps trying to come up with excuses for what's happening instead of placing the blame where it belongs." He explained worriedly.

"I think the best thing we can do is keep our heads low. It's people like the McKinnons who are in real trouble. They are openly against the mistreatment of Muggles and Muggleborns." Lionel went on. "Potter should watch himself too."

Lily had remained ducked down beneath the planter to listen to them and was now holding her breath.

"What do you mean? Potter's got one of the oldest bloodlines of any wizard at Hogwarts." Michael bit out worriedly.

"Well he's dating Evans now. And he's not shy about it at all. You've seen them."

"But it's not like James is going to marry Lily or something. I mean his family…"

"The Potter's have never cared what anyone thinks." Lionel interrupted. "They're in the same boat as the McKinnons and the Prewetts at this point. And James is only provoking people by being so open about his like for Evans."

There was a moment's silence before Michael responded even more softly. "I heard Rosier and that lot talking last week. They don't like the way Potter's been behaving. They say he needs to learn his place."

"See what I mean." Lionel whispered back fiercely. "Potter's walking a fine line by dating Evans and he better watch it or else he might find himself with a target on his back."

Lily had remained seated even after the two boys had wandered away. Her heart was hammering against her chest and she'd had to swallow thickly as she went over their words.

'Selfish' had flashed into her mind once again.

Once she'd recovered enough she had rejoined her classmates but had been quiet and reserved for the rest of the day.

At dinner James had questioned her.

"Lily what's wrong?" He asked reaching out to brush her hair behind her ear.

She shook her head at him but he hadn't looked convinced. It wasn't until after dinner when he was heading back toward their rooms that things had escalated.

She'd turned left along with Alice, Dorcas and Marlene when they'd reached the corridor that led to the Head's common room.

"Lils where are you going?" James had asked moving to catch up with her.

"I'm going to study." She'd answered back.

"Okay." James said rubbing his hand through his hair in confusion. "Do you mind if I come along?"

"You don't need to follow me everywhere James. I do have other friends." She bit back hotly.

They had reached the portrait of the Fat Lady and Lily had clambered up the steps after her friends, who were exchanging confused glances amongst themselves.

James followed after her and caught her arm lightly.

"I know you have other friends. I wasn't trying to keep you from them. I'm just worried. You've been quiet all afternoon. Did something happen?"

Lily yanked her arm out of his grip and threw her bag down on the nearest table.

"Why would you think that?" She retorted refusing to look at him.

"Because you're acting strange." James replied reaching for her again, and frowning when she backed away. "Will you talk to me please? I don't understand what's going on with you."

Lily sighed and buried her face in her hands. She couldn't help herself when she began to cry suddenly.

"Merlin Lily." James said stepping up to her and pulling her to him. "What on earth is going on?"

Lily buried her face in his chest and cried in frustration. "I don't know what to do."

"About what?" James asked worriedly.

"I can't help it James." She sobbed softly. "I can't help that I'm Muggleborn. I can't help it."

He pulled away from her and turned her face up to his. "I don't understand. Why would you want to be anything other than what you are?"

"Because. Things are getting worse. They're killing people. Good people." Lily sobbed. "People we used to know."  
"Lils…" James began trying to console her.

"No." She insisted pulling away from him. "I'm not going to let you try and tell me it will be okay. You don't know that. We've only been together for a month now, and already people are talking about you and how being with me is a stupid decision on your part."

"Who's talking?" James bit back. "And who cares? Let them talk."

"Of course you'd say that. Let them talk. Let them say things. But it's not that easy. People are saying that Purebloods are going to be killed for associating with my kind. Remember Kyle Dorset? He and his wife were murdered. He was a Pureblood, she was Muggleborn!" Lily was nearly shouting now.

"Lily calm down." James soothed trying to reach for her, but she stepped out of the way again. Inhaling sharply he spread his hands out in surrender. "What do you want from me? Do you want me to run scared? To let all this nonsense affect the way I live my life?"

"Of course not." She bit back, feeling beyond frustrated.

"Then what? You're shouting at me because I'm not sitting here cowering at the thought that Voldemort might target me." He growled hotly. "Well here's a newsflash Lily Evans. I could give a shit. That bastard can go to hell. I'm not going to quit feeling what I do for you just because he's starting to make people believe all this rubbish."

"That's not what I'm saying." She said rubbing her throbbing temples.

"Then what? What are you trying to say? You are obviously upset, and that's understandable. What I don't understand is why you're upset with me."

Lily shook her head sadly, unable to explain to him exactly what she was feeling.

"You know what I think." He said stepping back from her a little bit. "I think that you heard about Kyle and Evelyn and you thought about you and me. You thought about the fact that they might target me because of you, hell you might have even heard that they would, and the whole thing scared you."

She opened her mouth to explain but he held up a hand to keep her quiet and went on, "I think you're upset for two reasons Lily. I think you're upset because you're wrongly thinking that my being with you is dangerous for me. And you're upset because you're realizing just how much I mean to you and it's terrifying you."

He waited a moment letting the words hang between them. "Am I wrong?"

Lily refused to look at him. She was so unsure of everything that was going on around her that she didn't want to face what he was telling her, much less be forced to admit it.

"You know I understand that you're worried. Things are going on right now that shouldn't be. People are beginning to really be scared. There's a war brewing and who knows when it's going to hit full force. But isn't that all the more reason to keep on living? I for one don't want to know that I gave up on something so great just because I was afraid of what was coming around the corner." He said heatedly. "I'm crazy about you. I don't care who knows it and I'm not going to change the way I've been acting."

She looked up at him pleadingly, "James maybe we should just tone it down a little…"  
"That's bullshit Lily." He fumed.

"It's bullshit that I'm worried about you?" She snapped.

"No. It's bullshit that you're considering what you are right now just because you're scared." He retorted, his eyes flashing dangerously. "Don't you dare try and act differently when you're around me just because you think it will help the situation. I don't want some secret relationship. Or some false version of what we should be. I'm proud of you. I'm over the fucking moon that I'm with you…"

"You know I feel the same." She cut in. "Don't act like I don't."

"What do you want me to do then?" He breathed roughly.

She opened her mouth and then closed it, feeling frustrated at her own feelings.

"Tell you what," He said suddenly, "when you figure out what the hell it is you want from me let me know."

She watched as he walked away fuming and she wiped at her leaking eyes feeling defeated.

She flinched as the portrait hole slammed shut and then tiredly let herself fall onto the sofa. After a time she lifted her head out of her hands to see the inhabitants of the common room all watched her avidly.

"Oh go to hell." She snapped at them standing and making her way toward where her friends had sat near the fireplace.

She sat down amongst them and laid her head down upon her arms.

"Well that was…" Alice mumbled.

"Hot." Marlene filled in smiling cheekily. "Damn that boy's got a lot of pent up frustrations."

"Hush." Dorcas scolded her turning to Lily sympathetically. "Look Lils I get that you're scared. Truly I do. But don't you think that after all those things he said that you should probably think over what exactly you were so upset about?"

Lily lifted her head and looked at Dorcas sadly.

"He was right." She said softly. "That's the problem. He was dead on when he said I realized just how much he means to me. All day I've been thinking about what it would be like to know he was being targeted because of me. I can't get the thought of what happened to Kyle and Evelyn out of my head. I can't stomach the thought of James…" She trailed off as her thoughts turned black.

"Look Lils," Alice began seriously, "James is well aware of what his association with you means. Probably more aware of it than you are. He knows what he's getting himself into and he's more than willing to take the risk. Don't you think you owe it to him to risk the same? Especially if he was right and you do care for him so much…"

As Alice trailed off letting the words sink in Lily thought about what her friend was telling her and she nodded.

"You're absolutely right it's just that…I'm scared." She answered her voice cracking.

"Of what? James?" Alice asked softly.

"Of what my feelings for him might mean." Lily answered. "I didn't think it would all hit me this fast but when I'm with him, us being together, it's been the most amazing thing I've ever experienced and it's only been a month. I feel like I'm not ready for it all."

"So explain that to him." Marlene directed. "Let him know what you're feeling. Let him know why everything that happened today affected you so much."

Lily nodded and stood.

"I'm going to go find him."

"That's a good idea." Dorcas said smiling cheekily. "Just remember to actually talk to him and not just snog him."

Lily stuck her tongue out at her as she left, her mind spinning with what she would say to James once she saw him.

000000000000000000000

James lay on the sofa in his and Lily's common room trying to focus on a new novel of his when he felt a pair of slender arms wrap themselves around his neck. When her lips connected with his jaw he closed his eyes enjoying the sensation.

"I'm sorry." She said softly letting her lips brush over his skin as she spoke.

He nodded and she sighed in relief.

"We need to talk about a few things." She said moving around the couch.

He made to sit up but she stopped him laying herself down on top of him so that they were flush against each other. Her feet brushed against his calves as she adjusted her body until she was comfortable. She laid her hands one on top of the other on his chest and then propped her chin onto them so that they were looking at each other.

James fought the urge to smile at how adorable she looked as she searched for words.

"I know I reacted badly but everything I heard today scared me."

"Who told you all that?" He asked softly reaching out to run his hand through her hair.

"It's not important. I owe you an apology though for not talking about it with you before I let it get to me so badly." She said her head bobbing on her hands as she talked. "When I heard what had happened to Kyle and Evelyn I did picture you and me. I thought about how I would feel if something were to happen to you because of the way you feel about me. I…" She trailed off for a moment. "I felt guilty almost. To think that here I was so incredibly happy with you when in reality you being with me could potentially get you hurt not to mention that people are talking badly about you because you are with me. Before you say anything I know that it doesn't matter. I know that you are choosing me over your own safety and reputation but that doesn't make me feel any better about it. I still feel guilty for putting you in this position."

James sighed. "Lily you have nothing to feel guilty for. You have no control over the fact that you're Muggleborn just as I have no control over the fact that I'm a Pureblood. We are who we are. You shouldn't feel guilty about being yourself."  
"I know that it's just. I feel selfish. I feel like I'm keeping you despite my better judgment because it makes me feel good. My head keeps telling me the smart thing to do would be to end things and let you move on to someone better for you." She smiled at his outraged look and went on quickly. "But my heart keeps telling me that you're mine. That what we have is more important than anything else. It's like a constant battle inside me. I read the prophet and my head starts to take over. Then I look at you, or you kiss me, touch me, whatever, and my heart completely overrides anything my head might have said."

There was a moment's silence, where James waited, before she added. "I'm falling for you James Potter. In the worst way possible. I'm filled with thoughts of you. With hopes about us. I want to be with you all the time. I want to share things with you that I'd never even thought about sharing with another person. And it's only been a month. What does that mean?"

He smiled softly and tried to sound normal, even as his heart beat out of control. "It means I was right. You just needed to give us a chance. Now that you have you're seeing what's always been there, what I've always seen. You're seeing that you and I are right for each other."

She nodded and bit her lip. "That scares me too."

"I know." He answered grinning still.

"You do?"

"Of course. You don't know what to expect and that's frightening but honestly Lils I'm just as in the dark about all this as you are. The difference is I know without a doubt I want to keep going despite my being blind to the outcome." He answered, his hand now running along her sides and over her lower back.

"I want to keep going too. It's just that I…" She swallowed. "I don't want to get hurt. And I don't want you to get hurt."

James nodded knowing that she had just referenced two very different types of hurt. He gripped her about her ribs on both sides, pulling her up his body until he held her face over the top of his. Her hair fell about them in a curtain of silky scarlet and he inhaled the clean pure scent that was so very her.

"I'm not going to hurt you Lily." He answered sincerely. "But there's no reward without the risk."

She nodded down at him their eyes connecting hotly.

"Kiss me James." She whispered softly.

He lowered her so that their mouths fused and she gasped softly at the contact. James felt his body come alive as it always did when they were together like this. His blood pounded and his breathing became rapid as he kissed her with unrestrained enthusiasm.

He smiled when she reached up to pull her hair to one side so that it didn't get in the way and then proceeded to find every spot he knew that would make her make noise. Her skin was so soft it was almost too much for his senses to take. It was like running his lips over satin.

He grinned in triumph when she gasped lightly and made a slight moaning sound after he lightly licked the patch of skin behind her ear. He then rolled them over so that he was laying on top of her his legs in between hers. His hips and groin a scant space below where they really wanted to settle. Propping himself up on one arm he moved the other to her waist running it along her ribs and down to her hip and back again as he kissed her.

After a while and slowly so as not to startle her he moved past her hip and ran his hand along her skirt until he connected with the silky skin of her thigh. Gripping her there tightly he continued to kiss her.

His body clamored with the need to press himself closer to her to let go of everything and just let instinct rule the situation. She was so damned sexy it made him ache, literally. He was so hard it was nearly uncomfortable.

He groaned aloud when she bit his lower lip lightly and kissed her more intently. The taste of her was enough to make him feel a bit giddy much less the fact that she was now letting him run his hand up and down her thigh, slowly inching closer to the apex of her legs.

"Bloody hell James!"

He toppled off the couch and off of Lily at the sound of his friend's voice.

"Padfoot!" He growled pushing himself into a seated position his knees bent up toward his chest to glare angrily at his best friend, who was flanked by Remus and Peter.

"What? As if we knew we were going to stumble in and catch you and Lily-flower getting all…"

"Padfoot." He bit out again.

"All I'm saying is put a tie outside the door or something. Give us some warning if you don't want us barging in on you." Sirius chuckled, very aware of why his friend wasn't getting up off the floor.

Lily had scooted herself around James and leapt up off the couch. Her face matched her hair and her clothing was ridiculously rumpled as she moved away.

"Well I'll just be in my room if you need me." She said quickly not looking back at them.

"Oh I think James needs you Lily. I think he really needs you right now!" Sirius called after her cackling like mad.

"Leave her alone."

Sirius looked to James and began to laugh even harder.

"Well it seems we don't have any consoling to do. McKinnon told us you and Lily had a fight and that it wasn't pretty. We thought we'd come up to check on you but…it seems you two have already made up."

James flushed crimson and ran a hand through his hair.

"Well obviously." He said back meekly.

"Sorry Prongs." Remus put in lightly. "We really didn't mean to interrupt anything."

Nodding at his words James leaned his head back against the couch and began to think of every horrible, un-sensual image that he could conjure.

"Just imagine Slughorn in a swimsuit." Sirius suggested knowingly, moving to take a seat on the couch across from where James sat.

James chuckled and shifted his weight slightly and watched as Peter and Remus took up the remaining couch space.

"Well not to pry but that looked pretty intense from our viewpoint," Sirius said grinning mischievously.

Flushing crimson James nodded. "It's always like that with her."

"Always?" Remus put in quirking an eyebrow.

"Yes. It's like the instant I touch her my whole body reacts. I can't keep myself from getting completely wrapped up in her." He answered back smiling at the thought of Lily.

"Well it's obvious you weren't aware of anything _but_ Lily just now." Peter put in chuckling.

"So what was up anyway? You guys fought…" Sirius prompted.

"Yeah. She's scared of everything that's going on right now and she sort of took out her feelings on me a little, or so it seemed. I think she was worried both that I would give her the reaction that she wanted and also worried that I wouldn't. There's a part of both of us that is totally aware of what it's going to mean to try and be together with everything going on right now and it can sometimes be a little overwhelming. She's just worried that I'll end up hurt because of her."

As his friends nodded seriously, James grinned impishly. "There's definitely a part of me that's hurting because of her right now though."

The four Marauders burst out laughing and the red-head that was listening from beyond her doorway flushed crimson and launched herself into her bed.

000000000000000000

She smiled when she felt a pair of strong arms slip around her waist.

"What are you thinking about?"

She shivered at the deep sound of his voice and turned her gaze from the window.

"You," She stated plainly.

Grinning he kissed her softly. "That makes me feel good."

They stayed together like that for a while James holding her while she sat in the window seat.

"I'm starting to forget what it felt like not to be with you." Lily admitted sighing against his chest.

"I don't want to remember what it was like when we weren't together." He chuckled back.

Lily's mind was going a thousand miles a minute. She kept replaying the events of their relationship over and over again in her head.

The way he'd asked her out. The way he'd behaved the day after. The way they'd so easily gone from being friends to being a couple. How he'd learned so many ways to make her shiver and gasp. The times they'd snuck away from their friends to be alone together. The way he had tucked her in one night when she'd fallen asleep on the couch. The things everyone had said and done because they didn't like them being together. The fight that they'd had and the way Lily had felt afterward. And the week since in which she had felt connected to him on an even deeper level than before.

It was almost as if since they had gotten over their first fight without any scars they were both now more comfortable with the idea that things could still be right without everything being entirely peaceful.

Lily leaned into him and inhaled the scent that was totally and completely James. "Want to take a nap with me?" She said gesturing toward their common room that was visible through her open doorway.

"Definitely."

She giggled lightly when he scooped her up and headed toward the largest of the couches, carrying her as if she hardly weighed anything.

"Well Mr. Potter if you're going to be showing off just how impressively strong you are, we might not be getting much of a nap in."

James smiled and laid her down on the couch. Grinning down at her he said softly, "Well by all means Ms. Evans have your way with me."

They both sighed in pleasure when she pulled him down on top of her.


	20. Chapter 20

**Author's Note:**

**Hey Everyone! I hope you're all doing great! Thanks so much for all the Reviews! They really do make my day :)... So this is more of a filler chapter, with one important even included, and it helps me lead into what will happen in the next few. I changed a few things around after looking at my plotline and I think I'm now set to go for the next couple chapters!**

**I just wanted to say thankyou to all of you who have stayed with me this whole time or who have really enjoyed this story so far! I know it's been slow going for some of you who were probably hoping that this story would live up to its M rating a lot earlier (I promise I'll get there though, its not too far off) It really means a lot to me that all of you have been so wonderfully supportive! Please continue to review and let me know what you think!**

**To **It Rhymes With 7 **I hope you had a happy birthday and I'm sorry I was one day late with this chapter! **

**Well as usual here goes...**

**CHAPTER 20**

**A Date, A Kiss and What's to Come**

A little after a month and a half into term was the first Hogsmeade weekend followed the next weekend by the first quidditch match. Everyone was excited, especially the seventh years who had more work than they ever would have imagined possible in their NEWT classes.

Walking into their common room after quidditch practice one evening James spotted Lily pouring over her Defense Against the Dark Arts book and working on their latest essay.

He moved to sit next to her and she looked up at him with a smile.

"Hi, how was practice?"

"Pretty good. I think we'll be ready for sure come next weekend." He said leaning forward to kiss her lightly. "What are you doing?"

He followed her movements with his eyes as she sighed, stretched her arms above her head and then rolled her neck saying, "Working on this week's homework so that I can actually have a good time this weekend and not have to feel guilty."

"I see." He answered back gruffly his eyes still on her body. "You've been working hard a lot lately."

"Well not all of us are blessed with a ridiculous amount of talent." She teased. "I actually have to study this stuff a little to understand how it works."

James nodded and leaned back against the couch letting his left hand move to her lower back to knead the tense muscles there.

"That feels good." She moaned lightly, then asked quietly. "So how is it that you get everything so easily? With school I mean. It seems like we sit and listen to the lecture, which you don't always pay attention to, and then suddenly you just do whatever it is without any real thought or effort."

James shrugged closing his eyes and continuing to rub circles on her back.

"I can't really explain why I get it, I just always have. Magic comes naturally to me. It's like flying. When I'm flying I don't really have to constantly sit there and think 'okay I have to tell the broom where I want it to go', it's just instinctive. It's the same with magic." He explained lightly. "Sirius has always been the same way; I think it's why we understand each other so well. I mean don't get me wrong there are things I've had to look over to study, like the theory behind a certain spell, or what to do if it goes awry. But it's almost as if magic has just always been so much a part of me that I just understand it without having to know the specific how or why."

He heard her sigh heavily. "That must be nice. I wish I didn't have to pour over all of this all the time."

"You go overboard and you know it." He smiled. "You always want to be sure you have it absolutely right before you attempt it. Either that or you want to perfect what you learned in class so you do things over and over until you're satisfied. We both know you can do most things without having to study so much."

She laughed at his words. "Well I suppose you're somewhat right." She admitted. "I could be a little less serious about it all."

"Mmmm." James breathed back. "Just don't go changing on my account, I like that you're hardworking and I'm glad you take such an interest in your studies."

She beamed at him, though he didn't see it through his closed eyes and began to gather up her things.

"I've had enough of this for tonight though I think."

James reluctantly sat up and rubbed his eyes tiredly beneath his glasses.

"You look like you should go to sleep." She informed him as she stood to take her things to her room.

He caught her about her waist and pulled her over to him, positioning her so that she stood facing him between his knees. He leaned forward holding her about the hips to let his head rest against her stomach and said, "Sleep can wait. I want to see you for a bit first."

He breathed deeply against her stomach and smiled as the smell that was so very Lily filled his senses.

"What is it that you smell like?" He asked. "I never have been able to figure it out."

"Well my soap smells like flowers." She answered back; James could sense the blush that was creeping up over her.

"Do you ever wear perfume?"

She began running her hands through his hair as he kept his forehead pressed against her belly. "Not usually, though I have some that I wear on special occasions and the like."

He nodded against her and let himself enjoy the sensation of her hands running through his hair. After a while he reluctantly pulled back even more tired than before and no doubt looking as if he'd just flown through a tornado as his hair was bound to be a disaster.

"I wanted to ask you something?" He said looking up at her intently. "I was wondering if you would want to spend this Hogsmeade trip with me."

She grinned. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

He smiled. "Well I sort of meant with just me. As in we leave our friends behind. Like a date."

"You want me to go on a date with you? To Hogsmeade?" She questioned curiously.

James nodded. "I just figured I've never actually taken you on one and when Minnie was lecturing me the other day it occurred to me that while we've done a lot of things together most of it has been with our friends around. Apart from our library time we never really spent a lot of alone time together until we moved into this place." He said gesturing to their surroundings. "So would you want to? Spend the day with just me that is?"

James laughed when she launched herself into his lap, dropping all her things in the process, and began kissing his jaw, his neck, his nose, whatever she could find.

"Of…course…I…will…" She said punctuating each word with a kiss before pulling back and smiling down at him brilliantly. "Have I ever told you how incredibly sweet you are?"

He grinned back, "Only about once a day."

"Well that's because you are and I would love to spend the day with you this weekend."

He leaned forward and caught her lips with his own wrapping his arms around her and pulling her tight against him.

"Good." He said finally. "I can't wait."

"Me neither." She whispered back letting her lips find his once more.

* * *

"I need help!" Lily called out entering her old dorm early Saturday morning. "Like seriously! Alice wake up! Marli…Dor!"

Her friends all groaned, each trying to ignore her in their own way.

"I have a date remember? I need you guys…"

"Seriously Lils…It's like 6am. Leave us alone for another hour." Marlene groaned flopping over onto her stomach and trying to bury her head with the pillow.

"I'm nervous okay." Lily answered back moving to sit at the end of Marlene's bed. "I've never been on a date with James. Not really."

"It's Hogsmeade Lily, it's not like you don't know what to expect." Marlene grumbled from underneath her pillow, her hand flapping irritably at her friend. "You guys have spent loads of time there before."

"As friends." Lily stated. "Now I'm dating him. So I need help. What do I wear? How do I do my hair? What kind of…"

"Oh for the love of Merlin!" Alice shouted jumping up out of bed and moving to grab Lily and yank her off of Marlene's bed.

She towed her to the bathroom and shoved her through the door. "Go take an hour long shower for starters. Relax. Wash your hair, shave, soap up and get extremely clean. Then we'll work on the rest of you." She ordered shutting the door in Lily's face.

"Alice I love you." Dorcas called out groggily.

"You lot can thank me later." The petite girl bit out jumping back into her four poster and snuggling down into the warmth.

An hour and a half later Lily was watching in confusion as her friends picked out her clothes, discussed what to do with her hair and began to talk about eye shadow and lipstick. She was beginning to think she must have skipped classes somewhere that explained how one was supposed to go about being a girl. Why had she never learned these things before?

"Because Lily," Dorcas had answered when she'd asked, "you've never needed any of this. You still don't. You've always been very naturally pretty, something for which the rest of us would like to slap you but there it is."

"But I don't think…"

"Oh stop fishing for compliments." Dorcas muttered cutting her off. "I'm right and that's that."

Lily had remained silent after that, taking in all that was going on around her with a curious gaze.

After getting dressed in the outfit Dorcas told her to and sitting down to let Alice do her hair, followed by letting Marlene put her make-up on Lily felt as if she'd run a marathon.

"Stand up and let us see what you look like." Alice ordered as Marlene finished up.

Lily obediently stood and let them look her over. One by one identical grins split their faces. When they began to high five each other she bit her lip worriedly.

"Do I look okay?"

Marlene stepped forward and led her over to the mirror. "Lily honey, you look more than okay."

Lily's eyes widened at the reflection that met her in the mirror. It was her but different. An auburn haired beauty stood looking back at her and Lily couldn't keep herself from stepping forward just to make sure it was really her.

The girl in the reflection had her eyes and features but more so. Her eyes stood out even more than usual thanks to whatever Marlene had done with the eye-shadow. Her lips looked fuller, her skin softer and she wasn't sure if the pretty blush that covered her cheeks was real or not.

Her hair had been tamed into soft curls that fell prettily about her face and shoulders and down her back and her bangs had been controlled to sweep across her forehead in a very appealing way. Lily smiled at the effect it had.

Her outfit finished off the whole thing. She was wearing her tightest pair of dark blue jeans with black flats and a black v-neck sweater that fit her form, perfectly showing off her curves.

All in all the girl who was looking back at her was still Lily Evans but a whole new Lily Evans.

"How did you guys manage this?" She breathed finally.

"Oh please," Marlene said waving her hands in dismissal. "It was nothing. It's not hard at all to highlight your best features Lil."

"Well thankyou." She said suddenly feeling very nervous. "I really appreciate it."

"James is going to flip out when he sees you." Alice said smirking excitedly.

"Do you think he'll like it?" Lily questioned worriedly.

Her friends all rolled their eyes and ushered her toward the doorway. They walked with her out of the Gryffindor common room and all the way to the entrance hall where they converged around her hiding her from view.

"What are you…"

"Shhh." Dorcas hushed. "Let us have our fun."

Lily quirked an eyebrow at her but didn't argue following along to the place they normally met up with the Marauders.

"Damn," Marlene breathed suddenly. "Looks like you weren't the only one who took time to look good today Lily."

Alice nodded and purred teasingly, "You're man looks good enough to eat."

"Oh damn…this was a bad idea. A really really bad idea. Why did I ever…"

"Shut up Lils we're almost there." Alice cut her off tucking in tighter to Marlene to keep Lily from view.

"Hello there Potter." Marlene called out as they came to a stop. "Aren't we looking dashing today?"

"Leave him alone McKinnon he's anxious enough as it is." Sirius chortled.

"Well I suppose we won't keep him waiting then." Marlene answered back reaching behind her to pull Lily forward.

She stumbled a bit before righting herself, looking at her feet nervously. After a time she lifted her gaze up nervously unsure of his reaction.

Marlene hadn't been lying. James looked incredibly handsome. His jet black hair, though messy as always had been cut and it looked good on him. He wore a dark blue sweater with a white T-shirt underneath that made his eyes look even more golden brown. Honestly Lily was stunned that he could look even more handsome than usual.

"Say something." She heard Sirius hiss.

James suddenly closed the space between them and put his hands on her hips gripping her tightly.

"You look…." He trailed off swallowing thickly as he let his eyes scan her whole body again, "wow….I mean really…" He cleared his throat and locked his gaze with hers. "You look incredibly beautiful Lily."

She smiled and flushed crimson.

"Say thankyou." She heard Marlene mutter from behind her.

"Er…thankyou." She managed softly. "You look wonderful as well. I like your hair."

She reached out and ran her fingers through it, comparing it to it's former length and enjoying the softness.

The familiar gesture must have put James at ease because he took a deep breath and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together.

"Ready to go?'

Lily nodded and walked along side him toward the castle doors.

* * *

"Sweet Merlin what did you do to Evans?" Sirius breathed as he watched them walk away.

"Nothing. We just dolled her up a bit is all." Dorcas answered back smirking.

"Well I for one think we ought to keep the 'doll'-ing to a minimum. I don't know if it's fair to the male population of Hogwarts for that girl to walk around looking like that all the time." Remus answered back sounding just as stunned as Sirius.

"It's not fair to the female population you mean." Marlene said grinning.

"I don't think it's fair to anyone." Sirius stated dazedly. "She like sparkles or something when she's like that."

"That's just your imagination getting carried away Black." Alice said chuckling. "Besides there should be a law against James Potter being allowed to dress like that." She added nodding her head in James' direction.

"Definitely." Dorcas and Marlene added simultaneously.

"Want to follow them?" Sirius blurted suddenly.

The six friends looked at each other mischievously and then rushed forward to get out of the castle.

* * *

"So what are we going to do first?" Lily questioned, doing her best to quell the butterflies that were taking over her stomach.

They had reached the village and had had to stand at the entrance and wait for their friends to go by as they cackled madly and shouted things they thought were funny at them.

"I was thinking Gladrags actually. I've got to pick up some new dress robes so if you don't mind coming along…"

Lily shook her head. "I don't mind at all. What do you need dress robes for?"

"I'm not actually sure yet. My mum sent me a letter telling me I needed new ones but she didn't say for what. I think it's one of those instances where she is two steps ahead of my dad. I'm assuming that he'll mention what they are for in his next letter because he probably told her he wanted to give me the news but she couldn't keep herself from mentioning that I needed them." James explained shaking his head at the thought of his parents.

After James found some new dress robes, while Lily browsed through the women's section of the shop, they headed for the Three Broomsticks.

"We could go to Honeyduke's first if you want." James offered.

"Nah, I'm hungry. Lunch sounds like a good plan."

After all the nerves of the morning Lily was finally starting to calm down. Things were feeling normal between her and James again and she wasn't so self-conscious about her appearance.

She was relaxed enough that she merely giggled and kissed him back when he stopped to kiss her in the middle of the lane, even with people passing by on both sides. He had one arm wrapped about her and the other holding her jaw and her palms were pressed against his chest. She didn't even hesitate when he deepened the kiss and began full on snogging her in the middle of Hogsmeade.

"…James!...hello there…"

Suddenly a familiar voice broke in and James jerked his head up swiftly to yelp, "Dad!"

Lily spun around to find herself face to face with James' parents. Who were both smiling brightly and looking more than a little amused.

"Um we were just…That is I…" James stuttered.

"Oh we could see what you were doing just fine. It was kind of hard to miss." His dad teased.

"Jason don't you're embarrassing poor Lily." Charlotte admonished gesturing to Lily who had partially buried her face in her hands as it was as bright as her hair.

"What are you guys doing here?" James asked recovering from the shock and moving forward to hug his parents.

"I had a meeting here this morning. You're father had a little time off as well and agreed to come along to keep me company. It got over a little while ago so we were going to grab some lunch and shop a bit. We didn't realize it was a Hogsmeade weekend until we saw all the students." His mother explained.

"We were just about to go have lunch ourselves." James admitted.

"Well we'll join you then. That is if you don't mind." Jason said still smiling widely.

"Actually Lily and I were sort of on a date and…"

"Don't be silly." Lily said turning to look at him suddenly. "We have plenty of Hogsmeade weekends James. How often do you get to see your parents throughout the year?"

"You don't mind?" He asked her softly reaching out to tuck a stray curl behind her ear.

"Not at all."

Lily gasped softly when he leaned down and kissed her quickly, then slapped him on the arm.

"Behave yourself." She scolded. "You're embarrassing me."

"Oh please, because my parents are here? How many times have I told you they're ridiculously all over each other? It would be a bit hypocritical of them to.."

"Hush. Let's go. I'm hungry." Lily interrupted grabbing his hand and towing him along toward the Three Broomsticks.

James parents chuckled as he rolled his eyes at his girlfriend and gestured for them to follow.

Once inside the establishment they made their way to an open booth in the back and settled in.

"So I see things are going alright between the two of you?" Charlotte said diving right in.

James nodded while Lily blushed again. "They're going great."

"I have to admit I was pretty surprised when James wrote us to say you two were finally together. Mind you it might have had something to do with the fact that he'd charmed the letter and what I heard when I opened it was James' voice screaming.. 'SHE SAID YES! SHE SAID YES!' It took me a few minutes just to get the spell off in order to actually read the letter. Which was also filled with a lot of 'she said yes's." His mum teased.

"Well I was excited." James replied unabashedly.

"Understandably so," his dad chuckled.

Rosmerta appeared just then to take their orders.

"So rumor has it James Potter finally got Lily Evans to go out with him. Is this true?" She asked once she'd written it all down.

"I take it you've already seen Sirius today." James said laughing.

Rosmerta nodded. "Congratulations James. It's been a long time coming eh?"

"Worth the wait though." James answered back looking at Lily and slinging an arm around her shoulders.

Rosmerta nodded and then winked at them before making her way back to the bar.

"Exactly how long _have_ you been waiting to date Lily?" His mum asked once the woman had walked away.

"Six years." James answered.

Lily elbowed him and he quirked an eyebrow at her saying, "What?"

"You can't count when we were eleven."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't date people when you're eleven. It's silly. What are you going to do sit in the corridors holding hands and telling each other how adorable you think the other persons freckles are?" She stated shaking her head at him.

"Merlin, I'd forgotten you had freckles!" James exclaimed suddenly. "They used to be all across your nose and cheeks." He said tracing the place where they used to be with his finger.

"Don't remind me." Lily said rolling her eyes. "It took forever for them to start fading and even speeding up the process magically took a long time."

"You used magic to get rid of them?" James frowned. "Why? I liked them."

"Well I didn't." Lily wrinkled her nose. "They made me feel conspicuous."

"Sweetheart you have red-hair it's not like you're going to blend in with the crowd." James chortled.

Lily shrugged and turned back to James' parents.

"So how have things been?" She asked pleasantly.

As Charlotte and Jason told them about what they had been up to since the start of term, Rosmerta arrived with their food.

As they were eating and discussing what was going on in the ministry a voice broke in.

"Looks like you're girlfriend's even prettier than I thought Potter. Maybe I'd keep her under me for awhile afterall." Mulciber called as he strolled by heading for the door.

Lily instantly threw herself into James' lap as he attempted to jump up and go after him.

"Don't. You know it's not worth it." She pleaded wrapping her arms around his shoulders and trying to pull his gaze away from the door.

"I forgot I owed that bastard for last time." James said angrily.

"James really, you've got to let this go. They are always going to do this. I'm never going to stop being what I am and they aren't going to stop treating me differently for it." She said cupping his face in her hands and forcing him to look at her.

"You know that's not it. They don't treat the other muggleborns that way. They insult them sure, but you don't hear them saying the things they say about you." James said seriously.

"Yes they do."

"No they don't. I swear Lily if any one of them talks about shagging you one more time…"

"Why does that make a difference?" She questioned tiredly.

"Because it's not like they're making idle threats. Eventually they'll be in with Voldemort and I'll be damned if they think they can-"

"For the love of Merlin don't say it!" Lily shrieked clapping her hands over his mouth. "I don't want to hear it. I know what they say alright!"

She sighed tiredly and shifted across his lap to slide out of the booth.

"Where are you going?" James asked worriedly catching her hand.

"To the loo." She said flatly. "To try and regain some of the poise I walked in here with."

"Lils…" James trailed off as she moved away ignoring him.

He turned back to the table where his parents sat each with an unreadable expression.

"Don't lay in to me alright. I know I shouldn't let them get a rise out of me but you have no idea how vile they've been to her." James supplicated.

"Well judging from what that prat just said, I'd say I have a fair inclination of how they've been." His father said frowning.

"She's right though. My over-reacting about it isn't going to solve anything. I just…" James trailed off lifting his glasses so that he could rub the bridge of his nose, "…I can't stand the things they say about her. Mucliber's the worst. He's always on about how pretty she is and about how he'd like to have a go with her if I get tired of her."

"James," His mum said consolingly, "Things will get better. You'll see. They'll quit harassing her after a while."

He shook his head. "I think you're wrong. They're only biding their time. They're all in line with Voldemort. Most of them are set to be Death Eaters once we're done with Hogwarts. I don't see them lightening up any time soon."

"Why are they so fixated on Lily?" His dad questioned.

"I think it's because of the way she is. Lily is smart and popular with most people, and she's Head Girl this year. I think it bothers them that she's been so successful being a Muggleborn." He sighed. "It doesn't help that she's downright gorgeous either. I mean did you see her today?"

His parents both smiled at his words and nodded.

"She always looks lovely," his mum answered, "but she looked extra lovely today you're right."

"I can't get over it sometimes. I mean she actually said yes. She's been my girlfriend for nearly two months now." James said dazedly.

"Well we're definitely happy for you son. We like Lily a lot." His dad said grinning.

"You're going to need to apologize to her though James." His mum put in commandingly. "I think you embarrassed her further by making a big deal of that whole thing earlier."

"I know. Don't worry I'll make it up to her." He promised.

"And you'll need to teach that git Mulciber what's what as well." His dad put in firmly, holding up a hand to silence his wife. "Don't start Char. You know I'm right. He doesn't have to do it outright but I'm sure that between James and his lads they'll come up with some sort of retaliation. That idiot has it coming."

Surprisingly James mum just sighed and nodded.

Just as Rosmerta was moving away after checking up on them Lily returned.

"Hey," James said jumping up. "You alright?"

Lily nodded and slid back into the booth.

"I'm sorry," She said to James' parents. "I don't know what to say."

"There's nothing to be sorry for." Charlotte insisted.

"So Lily I take it my son has been treating you properly." Jason put in switching the subject.

Lily grinned. "He certainly has. James has been…well nothing short of an absolute gentleman."

"See I told you." James said smiling proudly.

"Well forgive me for wanting to hear it first hand and not through one of your letters." Jason answered smirking at his son.

"So what's you're family like Lily?" Charlotte asked curiously.

They spent the rest of their time together discussing her family and the Muggle world versus the Wizarding one. James parents were especially interested in many of the Muggle inventions Lily described. By the time they exited the building it was already nearing late afternoon and they had finished their lunch a very long time before.

"Well we've stayed far longer than we should've." Jason put in. "It's time we were heading back."

If Lily was surprised when James' mum leaned forward to hug her she didn't show it.

"Goodbye dear. We'll see you both soon. Christmas is just around the corner afterall."

James' dad nodded. "By the way I meant to mention it earlier but forgot, there's going to be a ministry ball this winter. They're trying to keep the moral up I think. That is what you're mother wrote to you about dress robes for James."

"How did you…" Charlotte began flushing.

Jason chuckled and slid his arm around his wife's shoulders. "If I didn't know you that well by now Char, then I'm a poor excuse for a husband."

"Can I bring Lily?" James asked excitedly.

Jason nodded, "Of course."

James smiled at her and she smiled back weakly.

"You don't want to go?" He said reading the hesitation on her face.

"Of course I do. That sounds…great." Lily finished lamely.

"Why don't you want to go?" James questioned.

"It's nothing really I'm just tired. I would love to go with you thank you for inviting me." Lily said seriously grabbing James' hand and squeezing it.

"It's settled then." His dad said jovially, and then he too leaned forward to hug Lily. "We'll see you two around Christmas then. That is unless we can make it to one of your matches James, but I'll be honest it's not looking likely."

After a few more farewells and smiles the two couples parted ways Lily and James heading toward Honeydukes and James' parents heading up the lane to apparate home.

"We'll buy you some sweets and then head back." James said wrapping his arm around Lily's shoulders. "I want to spend some time with you since my parents sort of muddled up our date a bit."

Lily grinned at him and allowed him to lead her away.

* * *

"So McKinnnon what's it to be then, Fanged Frisbee or Exploding Quill?" Sirius asked holding both up to show Marlene and grinning excitedly.

"Buy them both you know you want them." She said back smiling slightly.

"Very true." Sirius said.

The two of them made their purchases and then wandered up the lane, heading toward the Three Broomsticks where the rest of their friends were supposed to be waiting.

"Oh look there go Lily and James." Marlene pointed.

Sirius looked up to see the couple walking toward Honeydukes. James arm was slung over Lily's shoulders, as she leaned into him smiling lovingly.

"Those two are completely hopeless." He said chortling.

"I think it's nice." Marlene said smiling. "They are good together."

"I agree. Don't get me wrong I love that James has managed to get the girl of his dreams, and I think it's bloody fantastic that the two of them are getting on so well, I just always sort of knew they would be this way."

"What way?" Marlene questioned.

"Perfect for each other. Like they fit together. You could always just see it when they were arguing. There was so much there even when she was upset at him and he was irritated at her for not understanding. You could always tell that if they would look past what was keeping them apart they would realize there was something there. Something incredible." Sirius said his voice envious.

"I never pegged you for a romantic Sirius Black." Marlene teased.

"It's just that he's my best mate." Sirius supplied shrugging. "I've wanted him to be happy for so long that I guess I just feel a bit relieved that Evans finally came around you know."

Marlene nodded. "And what about you? I'm sure James wants the same thing for his best friend."  
Sirius shrugged again and felt heat creep into his cheeks. "Even if I did like someone it could never go anywhere."

"Why not?"

He shrugged again keeping his gaze on the lane ahead of them. "I'm not the type of bloke you bring home to mum and dad. Sure I fool around with a few birds here and there but I'm not the type to settle down with someone when I know they can do better." He said feeling like he was revealing more than he wanted to.

"That's ridiculous. You're a great guy." Marlene protested. "A girl would be lucky to have a lad like you. Especially if you could devote even a fraction of that troublesome nature to keeping her happy."

"If I were ever to get a girl, one I truly cared about that is, I'd devote more than a fraction of myself to her." He put in earnestly.

Suddenly she yanked on his arm, pulling him into a narrow alley between two shops.

"Look…" She said her voice sounding a bit shaky. "I'm going to do this now because I might never get up the courage to do it again. Just promise me you won't go running away afterward alright."

Sirius looked at her in confusion. She was still gripping his forearm tightly as she looked at him intently.

"Alright I promise." He consented, confused as to what she meant.

"Good…alright then I'll…" She looked about her for a moment and then deciding there was no help for it just dropped all her bags onto the ground and threw her arms about his neck.

Sirius was stunned to say the least when her lips met his. He was being kissed by Marlene McKinnon, the girl he'd been dreaming about for half his school career.

He stood still as a statue for a second as shock ruled his body. Then just as suddenly as she had he dropped his purchases as well and wrapped his arms about her.

Her lips were as smooth and velvety as he had always thought they would be. Taking control of the kiss he backed her up against the alley wall and deepened it. She tasted like mint and Sirius groaned pressing himself more firmly up against her.

Sweet Merlin he was snogging McKinnon. And it was hot! He gripped her tightly wanting her closer even though their bodies wouldn't permit it. Her hands had found their way into his hair and were working magic on his scalp. He reached down and lifted her leg wrapping it about his hip.

He wasn't sure how long they were there. He had no idea who might have seen them and truthfully he didn't care. He just kept kissing her, touching her, breathing her in.

After some indeterminate amount of time they both slowed down and pulled away.

Sirius looked down at her in wonder. She was blushing and breathless and he'd never seen her look more beautiful.

"So…I'm not running away." He said his voice sounding strange to his own ears.

She smiled at him.

"Good cause I don't want you to. And you promised."

Sirius shook his head in wonder at her words. Then leaned forward to kiss her lightly.

"Damn Marlene, I'm not sure I know what to do now."

She stroked his hair with her hands and said sweetly. "Don't worry, I'll fill you in as we go."

* * *

James towed Lily toward the castle kitchens and, after having a quick discussion with the house elves and managing to acquire enough food to feed six people much less two, they were off again.

They walked hand in hand back to their dormitory where James grinned at Lily as he took of his tie and hung it on the corner of the portrait of Sven the Strong-hearted.

"Just in case." He said winking and making her blush prettily.

They entered their common room and James laid out the food on the coffee table and shoved the couch backward a bit so that they could sit comfortably on the floor in front of it.

Lily conjured some comfy cushions and some blankets and then settled herself on them next to James.

"So I feel I need to apologize," He said as she began to help herself to the food. "You're right about me needing to let things go a bit when it comes to the Slytherins. I know sometimes I only make the situation worse when I let them get to me like that. I'm sorry if I upset you today."

Lily sighed and set the strawberry she was about to eat back on her plate. "I just wish you'd let _some_ of it go James. I know that not all of it can be ignored but sometimes it would be better if we just let the matter drop. Like today, with your parents there. I was…" She stopped and took a deep breath, "…so embarrassed. It was mortifying."

"I know and I didn't help the situation." He added glumly.

"No, you didn't. You made it worse by bringing up the fact that you're afraid they are really going to try and…and…" She trailed off unable to say the words. "I know it worries you. It worries me too. It's just that there isn't much we can do about it right now. Besides you know that while we are at Hogwarts it's all just idle threats. They can't really…"

"Don't put it past them Lily. They don't give a damn about Hogwarts' rules. They're just biding their time until they're out of here." James warned. "I know I've said it a million times but you need to be careful."

She nodded. "I understand. But I also don't want to go through every day being afraid either."

It was his turn to nod. "You're right. You shouldn't have to be afraid."

Lily sighed. "Can we just forget about it all for awhile and maybe go back to trying to have a nice end of our date?"

He grinned slightly and moved over closer to her, pulling her into his lap.

"Of course we can, but you know one of these days we are going to have to deal with it all. With our relationship and where it's going. With the fact that none of it is going to be easy. Dark times are around the corner, everyone can feel it. Sooner or later we're going to have to figure out our place in it all." He said his thoughts growing serious.

"What do you want you're place to be James?" Lily asked curiously. "Where will you be when Voldemort decides he's going to put himself out there for real?"

James eyes were far away for a moment and Lily felt herself shiver instinctively. She was afraid of what he was going to say and yet she knew it before the words ever left his mouth.

"I'll be fighting Lily. I'll be out there doing what I can to stop him."

She nodded and laid her head against his shoulder.

"I'm afraid of it all already." She admitted sadly. "I'm afraid and it isn't even really here yet is it?"

"Everyone's afraid." James told her kissing the top of her head. "That's half of why he's been so successful so far. He knows people are scared. It fuels him. My dad and I have talked and from what the Auror department can tell he's out of his mind. He likes making people afraid. He likes the fact that people are starting to call him You-Know-Who and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. He calls himself Lord Voldemort, everyone knows that, but now even his Death Eaters aren't using it. They call him the Dark Lord instead, like even his own followers aren't allowed to address him familiarly." James explained. "The aurors figure he's moving in stages. The first already took place. Doing minor, yet still horrible things, to build a name for himself and to gain followers. The second is occurring now. He's moving on to bigger incidents. Bigger names. He's gone after prominent wizards. Prominent families. He's starting to make people think they'll have to choose sides. Soon they think he'll move on to real scare tactics. Large scale attacks, more useless killings. He'll begin to turn people against each other. After that who knows…It's up to us I guess. To people to decide whether or not they are going to stand against him or let him have his way."

"Why are you telling me this?" Lily asked him pulling back so that she could look into his face.

"Because you need to know what's coming. Even more so than anyone else. He's targeting people like you right now. For some reason he has something against Muggles and Muggleborns. You need to know what is probably going to happen. You need to know that pretty soon me saying I'm going to fight isn't going to just be words." He said his voice sounding older and more tired than Lily had ever heard it.

"I don't understand where all this is coming from James. You've seemed fine up until today." She said feeling panicked.

He nodded and sighed. "You're right I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get all morose on you."

Lily still stared at him worriedly. Inwardly she was warring with herself. She wanted him to tell her everything he had heard. Everything his dad had said. All the things they imagined might happen. She wanted to be prepared. To be able to face the coming storm head on and not feel that she wasn't ready for it.

She also wanted to pretend he'd never spoken of any of it. That she hadn't read the papers the past month or heard the things being said. That there weren't any bad things happening and that people like her weren't the chosen targets at the moment. She wanted to live in her happy little bubble with James. With the carefree, arrogant, silly James who made her laugh and kissed her with enough passion to make her knees give out.

The James who held her now, she realized, was the James he hardly let people see. The one who even she had yet to really get to know. The one she suspected only his closest friends and parents ever really got a good look at. This James was serious, and determined and very aware of the turn their lives were about to take.

"Will you tell me later please?" She finally whispered.

"Tell you what?" He asked trying to grin half-heartedly.

"All of it. What you're thinking about now. What might be around the corner for us. I want to hear it, truly I do. Just…right now, I want to be with you. Just you. I don't' want to think about the world. Or about the bad parts of today. I want to think about what we were doing before you're parents showed up, about how we were the other day when your mates walked in. I want to be so caught up in you that everything else fades out." She stated desperately, her hands coming up to grab his face.

"Well," He said clearing his throat as his voice cracked, "by all means then..."

With that his lips met hers and Lily found herself sinking into the familiar, wonderful, completely pleasurable sensations that came with kissing James.

And for a long while everything else didn't matter.

* * *

REVIEW Please! :)


	21. Chapter 21

**Author's Note:**

**Hey to everyone! I'm very sorry the update was so long in between chapters, I did have a lovely 4 year anniversary with my boyfriend however and afterwards a not so lovely bout of being swamped with schoolwork, but hopefully this one makes up for the wait :) I like this chapter just for it's rather random necessity!**

**I want to thank all of you who reviewed chapter 20: Igneous Pride, ElvesWizardsCentaursOhmy, Moon-Lover1994, darkdaydarkernight, Meisterburger, Jasu, lilyandjames2790, scriptor90, I-lay-forever-wit-Fred-Weasley, BrokenFaerie16, and my ever faithful The DA is dressed to the nines! I know I don't always recognize everyone like I should but I want you to know I read all your reviews (and those of everyone who has ever reviewed a chapter before) and I love hearing from you! So thankyou so much!**

**And to twilightaddict323 thankyou for the whopping, i believe it was, 16 Reviews you left me as you got caught up with this story! They were fun to read!**

**Well this chapter deals a little closer with our lovely M content. The beginning is a scene I've had playing in my head ever since I watched the movie The Proposal (Disclaimer: No infringement intended) and the rest of it is the fallout along with Lily's conversation with Snape...the whole sisterly news stuff has been moved to the next chapter...**

**So here goes...**

**Chapter 21**

**A COUPLE OF SMACKS AND A MOMENT IN TIME**

Lily sighed as she let the hot water run over her skin. She didn't know what it was about taking a shower that she loved so much but once she was under the hot spray she had to force herself to not just stand there and relax until she was a ball of mush.

She smiled as she thought about the events of the past two weeks. Since the Hogsmeade weekend Lily had been having James fill her in on what he knew of the world outside of Hogwarts. She had listened quietly while he told her all about what the Aurors were doing and what they knew of Voldemort and his followers.

It had amazed her to discover that whole other side of James. She now knew that behind the carefree teenager there was a determined young man who was prepared to do whatever it took to stand up for his beliefs. It wasn't that she hadn't known that James wanted to do all that he could to help end the war, she just hadn't realized the extent to which he had gone to keep her and the rest of their friends from realizing just how much he knew about the awful things that were going on.

A few days after they'd gone to Hogsmeade Lily had been startled, as she headed from the Head's common room to lunch, when she'd overheard a few Ravenclaw girls laughing over an incident they'd witnessed involving the Slytherins.

"I couldn't believe it when I saw their faces. I mean it looked like someone had beaten them up. Leave it to the Marauders to come up with something that ingenious." One girl had exclaimed.

"How do you know it was them though? I heard they didn't know who had done it for sure." Another had asked curiously.

"Who else would be smart enough to come up with a spell that basically punches you every time you say something derogatory about Muggleborns?" The first had laughed, shaking her head at the genius of it.

Lily had rushed toward the Great Hall to find James, who had been spending the morning with his mates. She was coming down the main staircase when she saw him in the entrance hall.

"James!" She'd called.

He'd turned to her a huge smiled lighting up his face. Then he'd been stunned when she'd thrown herself into his arms and said breathlessly, "You are incredibly sweet!" before she'd kissed him. Thanking him passionately for caring enough about her to punish the people who'd hurt her feelings.

She smiled at the memory, her body tingling like it always did when she thought of James, as she finished washing the soap from her body. She reluctantly turned off the shower and reached around the curtain for a towel. She frowned. Where had she left it?

* * *

James sighed as he made his way across the common room and dropped his broomstick onto the floor in his room along with the rest of his quidditch gear. It had been a grueling practice. After they'd barely scraped by in their win against Ravenclaw he'd decided that he hadn't been doing enough as captain to prepare his team. He wasn't going to have a repeat experience against Hufflepuff come January, so he'd already begun pushing them harder.

He groaned tiredly as he pulled his shirt up and over his head and then removed his boots, pants and boxers. He grabbed his towel from the top of his dresser and wrapped it loosely about his hips. He couldn't wait to scrub away all the dirt and then go see Lily. He figured she was probably hanging out with her friends waiting for him to get done so that they could spend a few hours together. He smiled at the thought of her, already looking forward to when he could hold her again.

He was almost to the bathroom door when it suddenly burst open and a figure came streaking out smacking into his chest and sending him sprawling to the floor.

It took him a moment to realize that he was staring at his girlfriend and that she was…

"You're naked!" He screeched in shock.

"What the…James!" Lily screeched back.

"Why are you naked? And wet!" He yowled trying to figure out what to do, while at the same time trying not to look down too much.

"I…my towel…you were at quidditch…" Lily stuttered.

James knew his face was very likely the same color as Lily's hair and he couldn't figure out how to…oh Merlin he'd seen a _nipple_! He scrambled about trying to…_There it was again_!

"Holy fuck." He growled reaching up and pulling her flat against him. "Just…shit Lily just hold still."

It was too late. He knew his towel had been slipping and when she'd run into him it had only dislodged it more. With all their wriggling it had finally come apart enough that he was damned sure she was feeling…

"Oh!" She squeaked her eyes going wide and her face taking on a look that only someone as innocent as she was could ever manage.

"Sorry I uh…" James cleared his throat trying to figure out just how the hell they had ended up in this position and how the hell he was going to get them out of it.

In all the bloody stupid talks Sirius had given him never once had he told him what you were supposed to do when you ended up naked with a girl and wanted to get away without flaunting your rapidly growing hard-on.

As he pondered the ridiculousness of that thought he tried to look about him, without _really_ looking about, trying to find something that could actually be of use…_There! _

"Um Lily," He began hoarsely, "do you see that blanket over there on the arm of the couch?"

Her face, which she had been trying to bury into his chest, was scarlet as she looked up, spotted it, and nodded.

"Well I think I can reach it if we sort of slide over that way a bit, or if we roll over." He said closing his eyes as she wiggled a little. No doubt she was rapidly becoming more acquainted with a certain aspect of the male anatomy, as it was now pressed rather firmly against her lower stomach.

"Um…alright." She said looking down at him, something dark and hot evident in her gaze despite the awkwardness of the situation.

_Don't be a dumb fuck Potter!_ James scolded himself. Here they were in what had to be the most embarrassing situation of either of their lives and he was developing a growing urge to kiss her and-

"So do you want to slide…or roll?" Lily asked biting her lip awkwardly.

James shut his eyes again and debated as to what would turn out worse.

"I think we'll roll. Its…uh…quicker, you know?" He supplied lamely.

For the love of Merlin's left testicle could this get any worse?

Lily nodded at his words though and began to shift around trying to pin her arms firmly against his sides, hooking her hands underneath his shoulders.

"That's about as stable as I'm going to get." She said, squeezing her slippery body more tightly against his.

James was suddenly reconsidering what he considered torture to be, as he fought the urge to look down and see if her boobs looked as good pressed against him as he thought they did. He had never in his life felt anything as good as Lily's skin pressing against his own.

"Okay well…here goes." He tightened his hold on her with his left arm and then used his right arm and right leg to roll them both over closer to the couch.

One they came to a stop, her body now underneath his, he stretched out his right arm and tried to get a hold of the elusive fabric.

"Damnit!" He breathed missing it by no more than a few inches. He made a split second decision and launched himself up and off of her grabbing the blanket in his fist and then settling himself back down on top of her.

Her face was if possible, more scarlet and more stunned than before as he looked down at her again.

"Sorry Lily." He said softly.

She stared back at him her eyes blazing with something that he couldn't quite define. James knew his breathing was uneven and harsh and that by rolling over they had somehow managed to make things seem even more sexual than before. When he'd launched himself up he'd changed their positions a bit and his erection was now pressed up against her pelvis and her legs were positioned on either side of his, her hips forming an enticing cradle.

Merlin, he'd known she would feel good under him! He just couldn't believe how much better reality was turning out to be. Her skin was like satin and she smelled so good. Her body fit his perfectly and he wanted to…

"James." She said, her voice no more than a whisper, her eyes wide. "I'm going to run away now."

He nodded and handed her the blanket as he reached for the two sides of his towel. Lily rushed to cover herself as James gripped his towel together in front and rolled off of her. She moved quickly but not quickly enough and James caught sight of enough skin to haunt his dreams for the rest of his life.

Then Lily was jumping up and rushing toward her room and James was left sitting on the floor gaping after her, his body strung so tight he felt like he was going to snap, unsure of whether or not the whole thing had just been some bizarre dream or if it had actually happened.

* * *

An hour later Lily was flopped sideways on Alice's bed trying to get the story out through her embarrassment. When she'd shown up fifteen minutes before her friends had taken one look at her stunned face and demanded to know what had happened.

"-and then I ran away." She finished sighing and sitting up to look at her friends.

They each wore expressions of absolute shock and interest.

Marlene was of course the first to recover.

"So let me get this straight," she began giving her head a little shake as if to clear it, "You finished your shower and realized you'd left your towel in your room. After a bit of searching and coming up with nothing more than a small drying cloth you decided to make a run for it as no one was supposed to be around. But as you were making your escape you managed to slam _completely_ naked into a _nearly_ naked James. You went tumbling to the floor and…" Marlene paused and raised her eyebrows as if still unable to fathom how things had turned out as they did. "..and you and James ended up naked together on the floor."

Lily nodded her face scarlet, "Yeah. After his towel slipped it was basically just skin to skin."

Then it was Alice's turn to recover.

"Merlin Lily is his body as fantastic as it looks?" She exclaimed excitedly.

"I…" Lily buried her face in her hands unable to answer.

"It is isn't it? Oh I knew it. That boy is just too damn scrumptious." Alice cackled happily.

"Darling do try to remember you have a boyfriend." Dorcas said giving Alice an amused look.

"Oh I remember him. His name is Frank something-or-other. He's tall and rather cutely shy and very clever and loyal. And he _too_ has a fantastic body. Which is why I'm better able to appreciate that attribute in other guys." Alice chirped back smiling impishly.

Marlene snapped her fingers at them to get their attention and turned back to Lily. "So what now then? I mean have the two of you even talked about having se…"

"NO!" Lily shouted interrupting her. "Of course not! James and I…that is..."

"So you haven't talked about it." Marlene stated flatly. "Maybe now you should. I mean you guys were all over each other before but the whole nakedness thing has probably put both of your brains onto a different track."

"We were all over each other _snogging_!" Lily moaned. "I was perfectly fine with that. I mean yes I'd thought we might hit the whole…well a different level at some point, but it wasn't going to be any time soon."

"Well are you sure James was on the same page?" Dorcas asked. "I mean sometimes girls think everything is fine and guys are actually irritated at how slow things are moving."

Lily shook her head. "James isn't like that. He was happy. I…at least I thought so."

Her friends all looked at her sympathetically as she began to frown doubtfully.

"Do you even know if James has slept with anyone before?" Alice asked.

Lily's frown deepened.

"It seems to me that you two need to talk." Marlene said seriously. "Figure out where both of you stand on the whole thing. Maybe James isn't ready to take that step with you either whether or not he's been with someone before. All relationships are different. Maybe neither of you are ready right now."

"What makes you think I'm not ready?" Lily said trying to adopt a mature tone.

"Well for starters you've avoided saying the word 'sex'…" Here Lily let out a small squeak and Marlene chuckled. "…and you obviously don't like it when other people say it either."

"I'm not usually that way." Lily said groaning and flopping back onto Alice's bed again. "Normally we can talk about whatever. It's just that now, after today, every time you say it I can't help but think of James and…"  
"Oh sweet Merlin you saw it didn't you?" Alice threw in when Lily trailed off.

Lily flushed tellingly but said, "Saw what?"

"_It._" Alice went on smiling cheekily. "James' little friend."

"Ugh don't say it like that." Lily said sitting up her face still crimson. She grabbed one of Alice's pillows to bury her face in after she added shyly, "Besides it's not little."

Her friends all laughed and shrieked and began to attack her for details, smacking her and shoving her and pulling on her as she rolled over laughing at their behavior.

* * *

"Are you fucking serious?"

James looked at his best friend and grinned crookedly, "No and I don't want to mate. As sexy as you are I've never found myself battling the urge to…"

"Shut up you know what I meant." Sirius said staring at James with wide eyes. "You were for real naked with Evans?"

James nodded shyly and leaned back against Sirius' headboard. They were in the Marauder's dorm and he had just finished explaining what had happened with Lily. Sirius was sitting with one leg dangling off the bed his back against the post at the foot of the bed. Remus and Peter both sat on Remus' bed staring at him as well.

"Damn mate, that's…wow." Sirius said stunned. "I mean accident or no accident that's a pretty intense situation."

James nodded. "I think she's going to freak out though. I mean she always does when something like this happens. She'll probably sit there and over analyze it until she figures out some strange conclusion that can only be reached through girl logic and has a melt down."

"That's probably rather likely." Remus put in smiling.

"Who cares if she freaks out mate, what's important is what will happen now." Sirius threw in grinning.

"What do you mean?"

Sirius looked at him knowingly. "I mean now that you've basically seen Evans starkers you can't say you don't want to see more of it."

"I…" James began feeling confused. "I've always wanted to see her naked." His friends chuckled and he shook his head at them and went on. "I mean just because I'm now _very_ aware of what it is I'm waiting for it doesn't mean I want to push her into anything. Of course I want to shag Lily. I would have to be a eunuch not to want to do that. But I still respect her enough to know that that's not something she is probably ready for."

"How far have you two gone exactly?" Sirius asked impishly. "Like have you hit second base yet? Or are you rounding out toward third?"

"I never should have taught you those muggle terms." Remus mumbled rolling his eyes, but grinning slightly.

James shook his head. "We've only been snogging. Heavily and occasionally with roaming hands but…I haven't done anything involving removing her clothing or that might even come close to approaching that."

"What about that day we walked in on you?" Peter chimed in squeakily. "You had your hand up her skirt."

James eyed his friend with a frown. "You noticed that?"

"Kinda hard to miss there James." Sirius added with a wink.

"That day was probably the farthest we've gone. I mean when you guys walked in we were both a bit caught up in the other. We were getting over our fight and things were…heated. We haven't moved forward since then."

Sirius shrugged, "Maybe you should talk then. I mean if you're game for shagging her whenever she wants to take that step, then I'd say you need to figure out where her head is at."

James nodded and then grinned. "Can you believe we are actually having a serious conversation about me sleeping with Lily? Like it could actually happen now."

His friends all smiled.

"Well you better hope it's soon mate. Other wise you'll be keeping yourself warm at night with thoughts of what you saw today." Sirius added chortling. "I mean there's only so much wanking you can do to imaginary things. But now you've got the real deal stored up in your brain. You could be occupied for ages."

James reached over and smacked him upside the head grinning despite himself at his friend's outrageousness.

* * *

After talking to her friends Lily decided to take some time to go on a run as she hadn't done so in quite awhile. It helped her to clear her head, which right now was something she desperately needed. As evening began to fall she was just coming back in from her jaunt near the lake when she saw a dark figure up ahead.

She nearly groaned aloud at the sight of him and her stomach dropped as she began to feel uncomfortable.

"Sev." She said staidly once she was close enough for him to hear.

"You know I grow tired of telling you how absolutely foolish you're being." He said his tone quiet but thick with derision.

"And I'm tired of having to tell you that what I do is no longer any of your concern." She bit back, moving to make her way past him.

He reached out and grabbed her arm in a grip that was neither gentle nor harsh and pulled her to a stop.

"Look we are both tired and we are both near our breaking point with one another but I have to say this…"

His tone was serious enough that Lily conceded to stand still while he delivered whatever verbal tirade he had planned.

"You are endangering yourselves by being together. It's not what is good for either of you. He's a pureblood and you are a muggleborn. With the way things are going the two just don't mix right now. I'm aware you've heard this before and I'm aware you feel that you are above it all. However, I feel it is necessary to inform you that fairly soon things are going to get worse. You've been reading the papers. Muggleborns are going to start feeling the brunt of what fear can do to a normally tolerant people." Severus paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "No one will be safe from it all soon Lily. Least of all someone like you."

He paused again and through his teeth he added.

"And you're obnoxious boyfriend is going to be in nearly as much trouble as you by association."

Lily frowned and looked out at the lake. She couldn't meet his gaze. There was just something too... achingly familiar about talking to him like this. Like they were merely discussing the weather instead of the horrible prejudice she was forced to face, like it was a moment from the time before. A time when they both didn't have so much weight to carry.

"So what are you saying Sev? I should break things off?" She asked quietly, loose strands of her hair whirling about her face in the light breeze. "Because I can't do that. Call me selfish, call me foolish, say what you like, but I can't give up what I've found with him."

She paused thoughtfully before adding in barely more than a whisper. "Some part of you should be able to relate to that."

She turned her gaze to him finally to see him grounding his jaw in frustration. Another long pause ensued before he spoke again.

"You can't go on like this Lily. It's only been a few months and yet already you're the subject of more gossip than anyone should care to be part of. His family is too prominent. The situation is too obvious. You need to step back from it. Wait for things to unfold a little more."

She shook her head. "That would be the worst thing I could do. I won't back away from what I've found with him. You're right it's only been a few months and yet in that few months I've been happier than I ever could have imagined being with someone. I…I've come to need him more than I ever thought I would. And he needs me." She set her jaw and went on. "I won't hurt him by being a coward. He deserves more from me than that."

His black eyes turned to hers in misery.

"Things can change Lily. What if he turns out not to be the regal white knight you've made him out to be?"

"Then I'll cross that bridge when I come to it." She answered plainly. "For now I'm willing to give him as much as he asks for because he's earned that from me."

"Even you're virtue? You're good name? You're willing to sacrifice those to him as well?"

She sighed as she realized he was beginning to turn nasty once again.

"Don't play the innocent with me Sev. We both know wizards don't hold their people to the same standards muggles do. Hell even muggles have come to feel the whole remaining virtuous thing is outdated." She retorted hotly.

"You don't know what you are talking about." He snapped back. "You've never been around the high society purebloods. Those who have more money than sense and feel they can place condemnation on whomever they like. They'll tear you to shreds if they can. They'll act like you're nothing but his plaything. It's already started and you know it."

Lily couldn't help the flicker of fear that passed through her at his words. She thought back to the dozens of times she'd heard people whisper about how he would get tired of her. About how he couldn't be serious about dating someone of her background. About how she wasn't good enough for him.

She tilted her chin back defiantly, refusing to give in to the awful thoughts.

"So what if they think I'm not good enough for him, maybe they're right. But that doesn't…"

"Maybe they're right?" He repeated incredulously, his nostrils flaring. "You think that idiot toerag could ever come close to being your equal? For Merlin's sake Lily you're already letting it affect you." He breathed deeply in and out a few times before saying harshly. "You won't survive this unscarred."

Lily bit her lip and said softly. "Maybe you are right then Sev. About all of it. But I'm not willing to stay hidden away in the dark in fear of living my life because I might get hurt in the real world."

She stared at him pointedly and said seriously, "Life is about the choices we make, about living each moment to the fullest, about never giving in because fighting is the right thing to do. It's not about being afraid of the shadows. I refuse to give up one moment of possible happiness due to fear. And that's all you're spouting. You're building a supposed future in which I should be afraid. But there's a difference between being alive and living. And I'll gladly pay the price of one if it means I got to experience a little of the other."

Before he could say anything further she moved away and entered the castle and began to jog back up to the Gryffindor common room where she was pretty sure she was going to find James.

She wasn't disappointed; she spotted him the moment she stepped through the portrait hole.

He rose from the chair he was in once he caught sight of her, a slight flush marking his cheeks. Later on she would likely remember why he was feeling slightly awkward but in that moment her mind was consumed with only one thing.

She threw herself into his arms and said fiercely, "We live and love today James and what comes tomorrow will come. I don't care what happens as long as I have you."

She pulled back and looked at him intently. "You're everything that matters and I'm not going to give you up."

It was a testament to how well he knew her that he let her lips capture his without having to demand an explanation. He kissed her back hotly and Lily felt herself sink into the incredible sensation of being in his arms. Of being right where she belonged.

After an indeterminate amount of time they broke away as someone cleared their throat awkwardly. Lily looked at the table where he'd been sitting to find their friends all gathered around.

She smiled at them and was about to move away from James and sit amongst them when Sirius grinned impishly and said, "If this is Evan's reaction to this morning, you must look damn good naked Prongs."

Lily gasped and her face turned red as she remembered the events of that had occurred earlier. She then looked back at James her face awash with embarrassment and said weakly, "We need to talk."

He nodded and let her walk away a little before moving to collect his things. When he was through he reached out and smacked Sirius lightly upside his head again and growled, "One of these days I'm going to kill you out of pure frustration."

As James and Lily disappeared through the portrait hole Sirius looked at his friends in confusion and muttered,

"For all my genius and good looks I'm highly underappreciated."

* * *

Once they had settled in their common room sitting on their biggest couch and facing each other James waited for Lily to speak. After a while she cleared her throat.

"I'm sorry about this morning. I forgot my towel and…" She flushed a little as she trailed off.

James nodded. "I figured as much. I had thought you'd already be in the Gryffindor common room with your friends by then."

Lily nodded and bit her lip as an awkward silence descended.

"Look Lils," James said running a hand through his hair in frustration, "I know what happened earlier was a bit awkward and all but it shouldn't make things weird."  
"I agree and I'm not so much embarrassed about the whole thing anymore as sort of worried." She answered back honestly. "I mean don't get me wrong I still can't believe that it happened and I'm still just a tad mortified at how it all played out but…I don't really mind that you saw me naked."

James looked up at her slightly shocked. "You don't?"

"Well no. I mean I sort of figured you'd see me that way eventually anyhow." She mumbled feeling incredibly hot with mortification.

"I uh…" He cleared his throat roughly. "I know this is going to not come out at all like I want it to but I don't mind it either because I feel the same way. I had sort of assumed we'd hit a point in our relationship when we'd…"

He trailed off and tried to collect his thoughts.

"What I'm trying to say is that despite the awkwardness of this morning the whole incident got me thinking about you and I and where our relationship is at and I sort of wanted to know where you stood on the whole moving forward thing."

He waited while she processed his words and wondered if he hadn't overstepped himself by questioning her. Maybe she wasn't ready to talk about them going further yet. Maybe she didn't feel as strongly about him yet as he'd thought.

"While this will no doubt make me sound as completely ignorant as I believe I am when it comes to this subject," She took a steadying breath, "I'm not sure what I want yet. I know that when I'm with you I crave things. Physical things. I want to be intimate with you I just…don't know when I'll be ready for all of that. As I'm not really sure all of everything it will involve on my part I…" She shook her head as if to erase the thought. "Perhaps I want some things to move forward I just don't know where my boundaries are at this point." She took a deep breath and added in a rush as if she were afraid to get the words out, "I don't know if I'll be what you expect at any of it. Or if you expect anything at all."

James nodded and picking up on her habit bit his lip thoughtfully.

"I want whatever you want." He stated finally. "If you want to move forward I'm completely ready and willing to do so. If you aren't ready for that yet, then I am one hundred percent ready to wait for you to feel comfortable. I don't expect anything of you Lily that you aren't ready to give."

She smiled at him and then her expression wavered. "Can I ask you something?"

At his nod she rambled nervously, "Have you ever…that is to say have you done…I mean to say are you…"

He held up a hand to stop her and smiled softly. "Are you trying to ask if I've slept with someone before?"

"Sort of. I really was just curious if you've done anything in regard to the subject but I suppose we can start there." She answered her cheeks betraying her feelings as color appeared on her cheeks.

James sighed. It was one thing to talk about his virginal state with his friends and quite another to explain to Lily how he'd gone through seventeen years of his life, the latter part of them chalk full of raging hormones, without doing anything apart from snog a few times here and there.

"Okay here's the thing. You know I've been rather enamored of you for longer than either of us would care to admit." He chuckled softly at that and looked over toward the fire to collect his thoughts. "And I'll be honest I kissed my fair share of girls around the middle of our Hogwarts years. But…" His eyes turned back to hers and he noted the apprehension in the brilliant green orbs that looked back at him. "I've never really been able to give myself…any part of myself really…to anyone that wasn't you. So In answer to your question no I've never slept with anyone. I'm just as virginal as you are I suppose."

James watched as shock and relief and something like amazement moved across her face. There was a really long silence before he chuckled wryly.

"I know pretty pathetic of me right." He said lightly trying to make the whole thing not seem so intense.

"Don't say that." She said reaching for his hand. "And I'm sorry if my reaction bothered you I just…I'm sort of flattered and well to be honest quite stunned."

He looked at her and realized he was tired of sitting so far away. Giving her hand a firm tug he pulled her over to him and settled her into his lap.

"Talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking." He demanded feeling oddly vulnerable and awkward after revealing such a confidence.

"I just never realized that you would think so highly of it. From what my friends tell me it's not a huge deal to a lot of guys. The way they make it sound guys are willing to take what they can get a lot of the time. It doesn't seem to mar your reputations as harshly as it does ours and so I didn't think it would mean as much to you as it has to me." Lily explained running her hands through his hair and looking off into the distance as she talked. "I know this is going to sound awful but I'm actually really pleased you've never taken that step either."

James grinned. "So you don't think I'm completely ridiculous for having waited so long?"

Lily frowned at him. "Is that how you've felt about it?"

"Sometimes," he admitted. "Especially when it seemed like I was holding out for a dream that would probably never actually become reality."

She smiled at him and said, "I don't think it's ridiculous and I don't think there's anything wrong with you waiting for something that was actually meaningful to you. Afterall I never even kissed anyone because I never felt strongly enough about anyone to even think of trying it before you."

James grinned. "So I suppose this means we're pretty much on the same page then."

He frowned as Lily shrugged and looked away. "I'm still not sure about…"

He caught her face in his hands and kissed her softly. "There's no pressure Lily. I already told you it's whatever you want."

She nodded. "Can we just give it a bit? I mean let me give my nerves some time to settle and then we can…move forward a bit."

"I'm in for whatever is comfortable to you." He replied.

As she snuggled into his chest and began to relax letting him run his hands over her back and rub his thumb along her jaw line, he thought about how truly stunned he was to be sitting there.

They had just passed a milestone of sorts in their relationship. They had both agreed that they wanted to move forward, to keep going and to do so with one another. James couldn't believe that the girl in his arms was willing to give so much of herself to him. It was humbling to say the least.

He smiled and said softly, "So I guess I do look pretty good naked then huh?"

* * *

Two floors away, hidden in a secret alcove Sirius Black was burning.

He felt like his skin was on fire.

Every sense he had was honed in on how absolutely perfect the girl in his arms felt pressed up against him.

His shirt had long ago been thrown to the floor and her hands were greedily grabbing at his skin pulling him to her in much the same manner as he was holding her to himself.

Sweet Merlin he was hot. And she was so bloody sweet.

The buttons of her shirt parted at his command and the sides fell away to reveal the satin smoothness of her black bra beneath.

His hands roamed the sweet curves and planes of her body as his tongue delved deeper into her mouth.

He groaned and buried his face in her hair as she pulled back to let her lips move over his skin.

"Marlene."

The hoarse sound of her name left his lips as her tongue and lips travelled the length of his jaw and the sound of it carried along the length of the room until it hit the barrier of his silencing spell.

He was burning. Burning for her and slowly, effortlessly he gave himself up to it.


	22. Chapter 22

**Authors Note:**

**Thanks to **BoulderGirl1059, ElvesWizardsCentaursOhmy, Mogseltof, Meisterburger, bball0213, , summersrain, twilightaddict323, BrokenFaerie16, Karol Wheezy, zombie8 and (**the always faithful**) the DA is dressed to the nines**, for reviewing chapter 21! I'm glad you guys are enjoying the story (almost) as much as I am :)**

**This chapter somehow ended up rather long when I don't really feel it has a lot of meaningful content...however it does have a rather long L/J scene that I'm sure many of you will like quite a bit :) But because it doesn't feel as full as most of my other chapters I don't feel as happy with it. This means that I will very likely be trying to make up for that with the next few chapters and lucky for me having a bit more substance come along fits the plotline perfectly! Don't worry though I'll keep you all entertained with lots of Lily and James, some Sirius and Marlene and for those of you who were starting to worry I was neglecting them, a bit of Alice and Frank. I want to add a little about Dorcas and Remus but I'm waiting for the right time...I really do love Remus and I feel kind of bad that he's been taking a bit of a back seat in this fic so far (I will do my best to fix this as well). **

**Well I'm at 166 reviews and over 25,000 hits to this story so thankyou to everyone who stops by to read it and a huge THANKYOU to those of you who review :) I read them all and love getting your feedback! So keep the reviews coming and...**

**Enjoy!**

**CHAPTER 22**

**Sisterly News, Suspicious Marauding and Another Step Forward**

At breakfast a few days after Lily and James' mishap a letter came from none other than Petunia. Lily had been awed by the sight of James' owl, which she now very likely used just as often as he did, with a distinctly pink envelope in its clutches. When he had landed in front of her Lily had grinned at James teasingly as his owl, aptly named Archimedes, had taken to delivering the post to her before him.

"Oh har har." James said rolling his eyes. "Just because Archie has turned traitor doesn't mean you should rub it in Lils."

Lily reached for her letters and then handed over his. She went immediately to the pink envelope knowing it had to be from her sister.

She frowned when another less garishly colored envelope fell out into her lap.

Picking it up and looking at the fancy seal and expensive paper Lily felt her stomach drop. Her brows furrowed in confusion she began to read the first letter.

_Lily,_

_Vernon has asked me to marry him and I have accepted. The wedding is to take place in late January. I know it is short notice but Vernon and I have been discussing it for ages. I've enclosed your invitation and at mother's insistence have agreed you may bring a guest. I would have asked you to be a part of the bridal party but we both know that would only cause a lot of difficulty as you will be away at school and won't be able to attend regular fittings and help out with any of the usual activities. _

_Though I don't know why I'm bothering to ask I would like it if you would be willing to throw my bridal shower. I have planned it so that it will take place shortly after Christmas while you are still at home on break. I'll understand however if you don't feel up to the commitment. _

_Fill out the invite and return it please. _

_Petunia_

Lily stared at her sister's letter in shock for a moment before reaching for the cream colored envelope with pale blue ribbons and breaking it open. She read over the invite stunned to see her sister's name next to that of Vernon Dursley as it discussed their wedding arrangements.

Her sister was getting married Saturday, January 21 1978. Lily couldn't believe it. It was all so surreal. Petunia was only a few years older than herself. She hadn't realized just how serious her commitment to Vernon had become.

"Lily are you alright?" Alice asked curiously. "You've been staring at that fancy bit of parchment for almost ten minutes now."

Lily nodded still staring dumbstruck at the invitation.

"My sister is getting married." She managed finally.

"Petunia?" Marlene screeched, snatching the invitation out of Lily's hands. "You can't be serious?"

Lily was still feeling shocked. When had things changed? When had she and Petunia gone from being small and playing in the garden to being old enough to be seriously committed enough to agree to marry someone?

"Are you upset?" James asked her softly his hand finding its way to her lower back.

Lily shook her head. "I'm a bit stunned is all. I hadn't really taken note of how fond she was becoming of him. I knew they had been dating each other for awhile but I hadn't really considered what that would lead to."

"Are you in the wedding?" He asked curiously.

"No. She said it would be too complicated trying to get me through fittings and such. She said I wouldn't be there to participate in all the usual wedding events." Lily explained. "And she's right. I wouldn't be. I couldn't take that much time off of school what with NEWTs this year and with things like that often taking place at the last minute."

James nodded in understanding. "You're still a bit disappointed though."

It was a statement not a question but Lily nodded anyway. "I am. I mean I had always thought we would be in each others ceremonies. I know we haven't been the best of sisters since I started school here and I never would have expected her to make me her maid of honor but…" Lily shrugged and then smiled slightly. "She asked me to throw her bridal shower though."

James quirked an eyebrow at her in question. "Is that meaningful?"

Lily nodded. "Typically it is one of the maid of honor's duties."

"Well it would seem to me that she still wants you to be a part of it then." James said smiling.

Lily couldn't help but smile widely as well. Despite their differences Petunia still wanted her to be included in her wedding. She was more pleased than she would have thought at getting to throw her sister's bridal shower.

"I'm going to go write her back." She said snatching the invite out of her friend's hands and grabbing up her letter before moving off.

"Don't forget to eat something." James shouted after her.

Lily waved at him in acknowledgement and reached around a group of first year boys to snatch up an apple. She held it up to show him before rushing out of the great hall.

James chuckled at her and shook his head in amusement.

J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L

Petunia accepted the letter from her mother feeling more nervous than she had thought she would. It hadn't taken Lily long at all to get back to her. She moved to sit at the breakfast table as she opened the letter and began to read.

_Dear Petunia,_

_I'm so very happy for you. Congratulations! I just can't believe you are getting married. _

_First off I would love to throw your bridal shower and I'm very honoured that you asked. Write me back and let me know what colours and such you are planning on for the wedding and I'll start planning straight away as the winter holiday is just around the corner. I would also love any input on what you would specifically like me to include in the shower and what sort of setting you were imagining… indoors? Out in the garden? Somewhere else altogether? I would appreciate anything that can help me make the day perfect for you._

_Secondly I want to apologize. I know I wasn't always the most supportive when it came to your relationship with Vernon. I'm sorry for that. Though it is no excuse I have to admit I hadn't realized just how serious you were about him. To be honest you being engaged has come as quite a shock to me…weren't we just playing fairies in the garden last year? Time has run away with me and I was stunned to say the least when I got your letter. _

_I am so very happy for you though Pet. I wish I were there to hug you and fuss over you and tell you just how beautiful a bride I know you are going to be. I suppose I'll just have to wait until I see you to do it…so be prepared!_

_I love you!_

_Congratulations again!_

_Lily_

Petunia hadn't realized she'd become teary eyed until her mother asked suddenly, "Petunia dear are you alright?"

She looked up suddenly wiping her eyes and smiling genuinely.

"Lily says she'd be delighted to host the bridal shower." She answered back with as much dignity as she could muster.

Her mother smiled lovingly in understanding.

"Of course she would be. It was very sweet of you to ask her. I'm sure she's just over the moon about you marrying Vernon."

Petunia's grin widened shyly and she said softly, "You know I think she is."

* * *

"James this is the third time this term you've had to ask for a replacement on patrol." Lily said her brows knitting together in confusion. "What is going on with your friends that you have to be gone for so long?"

Lily watched as his complexion reddened and he shrugged. "I have Marauder business to attend to."

"James Potter that is a ridiculous excuse and we both know it. Why can't you do your marauding on a different day? On one of your days off for instance. Why do you have to skip Thursday specifically?" Lily pressed.

Running a hand through his hair James shrugged again. "I can't tell you okay. I just have things I have to do with the guys."

Lily frowned in confusion. While James didn't always tell her what he and his friends got up to he had never specifically evaded her questions either.

"Why the eleventh? Why this Thursday? Is there something I should know about?" She continued feeling oddly frustrated with his lack of explanation.

"Lily please. I know that it seems shifty of me to not explain what I'm doing but I honestly can't. It isn't just about me. If it was you know I would come out with it. I don't like keeping things from you."

She sighed. "It's not something that I'm going to be furious with you about is it?"

His flush deepened. "To be honest I'm not sure how you would take it."

Lily let that thought run through her head as they neared their portrait hole and after giving the password she made her way inside and dropped her things on the nearest sofa.

Suddenly it occurred to her. The eleventh, that coming Thursday was the full moon.

"Is this about Remus?" She turned to face him, noting the slightly stunned look on his face.

"Yes. Sort of." He replied honestly his expression worried. "How did you know?"

"The last two times you've had to skip patrol it's been the full moon too." She mused piecing it together. "Do you go wait for him to come back or something?"

James shrugged. "I really can't talk about it Lily."

She nodded aware of what it meant for him to keep his word to his friends. She was still more than a little suspicious as to what he would be doing. Afterall Remus was a werewolf, so it wasn't as if James, Sirius and Peter could go frolicking about with him. Something was tugging at the back of her mind. She couldn't quite place what it was that was bothering her about the whole thing.

"Okay." She said finally. "I'm not saying I like being left out of the loop on this but I understand that there are things you share with your mates that I don't expect you to share with me. Just promise me that whatever it is you are doing that you will be careful."

She still had that nagging feeling in her mind and she knew whatever they were doing was very likely not entirely safe.

"I will be as careful as I can be." James agreed coming to stand before her.

His arms looped about her and he kissed her forehead tenderly.

"Thankyou for being so understanding. I'm sorry I can't tell you all about it. It's just…not entirely my place to do that."

She nodded slightly. "I know. I'm sure this will happen again and like I said I don't expect to know everything that you do with the blokes but I do expect you to be careful no matter what you are doing."

James leaned away from her and smiled widely. "You have to be the best girlfriend in the entire world." He said seriously. "How did I get so lucky?"

"I'm not sure." She mused playfully. "Sometimes I still wonder if I'm under the imperious curse."

"Oh very funny." He chortled.

Lily just grinned and pulled his lips to hers for a kiss.

James groaned at the taste of her and began to back her up toward the wall. As her shoulders connected with the paneling she felt his arms tighten around her pulling her to his chest.

She had never imagined things would be like this. So hot and intense and completely overwhelming all the time. James didn't do anything in half measures and that included kissing. His passionate nature kept him from holding anything back and Lily found that a part of her was constantly ready to accommodate him.

She moaned softly in complaint when his lips left hers.

"I'm sorry." He said genuinely. "I have to get to practice though. If I'm late again the team is never going to let me live it down."

Lily pouted. "So I can't walk you down then?"

"Definitely not." James answered his eyes going dark at the thought of what had happened the last time she'd walked him to practice.

He had still been kissing her when he'd backed up into the locker room. He'd been maneuvering her into a position in his arms where he could lift her up and press her against his groin when Sirius had called out in an amused tone,

"Nice of you to join us captain."

James had broken away from her with a stunned look on his face. He hadn't realized where they were at all. He had flushed crimson and Lily had laughed lightly before pulling his head down to hers and whispering in his ear, "Have a nice practice, I'll be waiting up for you."

He had turned about feeling dazed to watch her walk away.

"For Merlin's sake James just shag the girl already!" Sirius groaned theatrically grabbing the back of his friend's robes and pulling him further into the locker room.

The rest of the team had laughed at the joke and James had grinned from ear to ear.

"That girl is going to be the death of me." He said happily.

"You probably shouldn't look so excited about that." Dorcas told him cheekily.

James had just continued to smile and launched himself into practice doing everything he could to speed things up so that he could get back to her. When he did arrive back she hadn't disappointed him.

"So you are just leaving me to study myself into a stupor?" Lily whined brining him back to the present. "How am I even supposed to concentrate on my work when all I will be thinking about is how sweaty and hot your are going to be out there on the quidditch pitch?"

James grinned loving it when she flirted so openly. "You'll survive. When I get back I'll reward you for being so patient."

Her slight intake of breath gave away just how enticing the offer was to her.

"By all means get going then. I don't like to be kept waiting." She directed, kissing him once more on the lips and shoving him away from her.

James was still grinning like a madman when he got to the locker room.

"Damn Evans must really be treating you well." The fifth year Lewis Blackmore, who had taken the place of seeker now that Gideon was gone, remarked with a wink at Sirius.

"She doesn't even do anything and he gets that look on his face." Sirius said rolling his eyes theatrically for Lewis' benefit. "It's pathetic."

James just sat and began to exchange his trainers for his quidditch boots.

"Seriously Prongs did she even do anything this time?" Sirius questioned as he too began unlacing his trainers.

"Nothing more than usual." James replied through his smile.

"I've got to start limiting the amount of time you are allowed to get off with her." Sirius teased. "I think you need to start cutting yourself off a bit."

James shook his head. "It wouldn't matter. All she has to do is be within ten feet of me and I can't focus."

"I've noticed." Sirius teased.

"So you're pretty serious about her then?" Lewis asked his tone forcibly casual.

"Very." James replied with a nod.

"So you don't care that she's Muggleborn then?" The fifth year asked his brown eyes serious, his tone now slightly nervous.

"No." James said sitting up to look the other boy in the face. "Why would that matter?"

Lewis shrugged running a hand through his dark brown hair. "It doesn't. It shouldn't. It's only that you're a Pureblood and she's a Muggleborn. People have been all over you two since you first started hanging out. I'm just surprised it doesn't bother you more is all."

James shook his head dismissively. "I don't care what people think. I'm completely devoted to Lily and I couldn't be happier that she's my girlfriend."

"I admire that." Lewis said his tone serious. "It's just…how did you get her to agree that being together was worth it?"

Sirius and James shared a look of understanding before turning back to Lewis with identical looks of interest.

"Well it was pretty hard. After everything started up with the Slytherins and with all the pureblood supremacy nonsense going around right now she was pretty worried about it…she still is. I just had to be persistent. I had to keep letting her know I wanted her. Only her. If I gave in even an inch she would have taken it as a sign that it wasn't going to work." James paused thoughtfully. "Eventually I had to make her realize that the important thing was that we had something between us that outweighed all the other bullshit. That in the end the only thing that mattered was that I wanted to be with her and she wanted to be with me."

Lewis nodded and went to tying up his laces, his face thoughtful.

"So…who's the girl?" Sirius questioned slyly.

"Morene Cunningham." Dorcas' voice broke in as she took a seat next to Lewis. "She's really nice. Really pretty too. I've noticed you hanging out with her."

"I've seen her around. Little thing, dark hair, blue eyes." Sirius put in nodding.

Lewis had turned red with embarrassment. "Yeah that's her. Too bad she's dead set on avoiding me these days. I tried to talk to her again today but she won't leave her friends and she keeps coming up with excuses."

"So she's Muggleborn right?" James questioned. At Lewis' nod he said, "I could see if Lily would talk to her for you."

The younger boy looked hopeful. "Do you think it would help?"

"It couldn't hurt." James threw in. "You're a Pureblood right, your brother Ewan was two years ahead of me?"

"Yeah. Ewan married Elise Bell. My parents were thrilled." Lewis said his tone frustrated.

"I take it they aren't too keen on your choice of girlfriend." Sirius stated sympathetically.

"It's not that. They aren't prejudiced or anything. They are just worried. When I told them about Morene they said that maybe her being reluctant about things was for the best. They encouraged me to just let things lie for now and to try and see other girls." Lewis sighed. "The problem is I can't get myself to even think about anyone else. She's…Merlin I think she's _it_ you know?" He laughed harshly. "That's stupid isn't it? I'm not even sixteen yet what the hell do I know."

"James has been in love with Lily since he laid eyes on her." Sirius said chortling as James shoved him in mock irritation.

Lewis' eyes shot to James again. "Do you…what I mean to say is how did you know you loved her? That it wasn't merely some stupid crush or something?"

James sighed and scratched his head, extremely aware that the whole quidditch team was now listening in on their conversation.

"You know that it's the real thing when no matter what you do you can't get her out of your head. When you feel like something inside you is screaming at you to do whatever it takes, make an idiot of yourself, act completely out of character, do things you wouldn't have imagined yourself doing in a million years, anything so long as it gets her attention. When you don't care if she's screaming at you so long as it is you she's focused on, you she's paying attention to. When you hate the idea of any other blokes being with her. When you'll take whatever consequences come your way so long as she knows how you feel about her." He paused and looked the younger boy straight in the eye. "When you realize that you would do anything so long as it makes her happy, then I'd say it's the real thing."

James stood feeling rather awkward after blurting that all out and the rest of the team, still silently processing his words, stood as well and began to file out of the locker room to make their way onto the pitch. James' eyebrows shot up as he heard Sirius, who was the last one to stand, mutter fiercely,

"Oh bloody hell."

* * *

When James returned to his and Lily's common room he found her already dressed for bed and curled up with a thick book in one of the big comfy armchairs. He read the title over her shoulder and smiled.

"The Once and Future King. Interesting choice." He stated, causing her to sit up and smile at him.

"How was practice?" She asked moving over so that he could slip onto the chair next to her.

"Alright. If we keep up the intensity we'll be good to go next term." He said unable to avoid the temptation of reaching out to run his fingers through her hair.

"Well you certainly kept me waiting long enough. I even finished that essay Slughorn assigned today."

"Sorry, I had a bit of a talk with Lewis Blackmore both before and after practice. He needed some advice." James explained. "He's been trying to get Morene Cunningham to be his girlfriend but she's really reluctant because he's a Pureblood and she's a Muggleborn."

James watched as Lily's eyes filled with understanding.

"I told him I'd see if you would maybe talk to her a bit. See where she stands with the whole thing. Lewis seems pretty serious about her and it would be a shame for them to not be together simply because of the way the world is right now." James added when she remained silent.

"Sure I know who she is, I'll see what I can do." Lily answered her tone determined.

James grinned at her and kissed her softly. "I'm going to shower and then I'll make good on that reward we talked about."

Lily's eyes flashed hotly as she watched him walk away to grab his things from his room and James had to keep himself from going back to her right then and there.

He emerged from his shower fifteen minutes later to find the common room empty. He made his way to Lily's room and found it was vacant as well.

He called out for her and was startled when he heard her voice answer from his room.

"I'm in here."

When he walked into the room he couldn't help but grin, Lily was apparently going through his bookshelf looking for titles that she had yet to read.

"I'm taking those okay." She said gesturing to the wobbling stack that was on the floor by her feet. "I haven't read them yet and I'm sure I'll have enough time to get through at least a few of them over Christmas and next term."

"Take whatever you want. You're welcome to borrow whatever you feel like." He said moving toward his desk and draping his wet towel over the back of it.

When he turned back around she was just sitting down on his bed. He liked the sight of her there a little too much. It made his blood start pounding in his ears and his chest roar with the need to go to her.

Since they had moved into the Head's common room James and Lily had pretty much steered clear of each other's private space, really only going into each others rooms if they needed the other person. Lily being in his room lounging on his bed was a wholly unfamiliar scene and James was more than a little pleased at the change.

"You know if you keep walking around bare-chested all the time I might embarrass myself and swoon."

He smiled at her words and moved toward her. Positioning his hands on either side of her he covered her mouth with his own. He kissed her softly at first letting her know without words that he'd missed her.

When they broke apart she was smiling.

"Are you hungry?" She asked her eyes connecting with his. "You look hungry."

He nodded. "I am."

"Well do you want to go and get some food from the kitchens I'm sure…"

"I don't want food." He said watching as her eyes widened in understanding.

"Oh," Was all she managed before she swallowed noticeably.

James leaned forward and kissed her deeply, his body reacting to her being in his room and in his bed in a way that bordered on primal.

She belonged there. There was no doubt in his mind that Lily belonged in his room, in his bed, her scent seeping into his things. He wanted her to stay. To become comfortable there. He wanted his space to be her space.

"James," She gasped softly as his hands fisted in her hair and tilted her head to the side to give him better access to her neck.

He continued his path down her throat pushing her back onto the bed as his lips moved further south. He grinned against her skin where he felt her pulse hammering and nipped lightly. She had fisted her hands in the bedspread and he could feel her chest rising and falling as his elbows hit the mattress. He pulled her hair up and out of the way, letting it fan out around her head and continued his way along her shoulders, his lips sliding along skin that felt like satin.

She reached up tentatively to run her hands along his arms, her fingers following the slopes of his biceps up to his shoulders and back down again. Internally he was begging her to keep touching him. To be bold and keep running her hands along his skin. He needed her to take whatever she wanted from him. To feel every inch of the skin that was burning for her.

She moaned when he sucked the skin beneath her ear and James felt his body harden even further. He couldn't keep himself from letting his lower body press down into hers. Her legs were still hanging off the bed and forming an all too inviting frame for him to fit his hips into. When he pressed himself against her she gasped and pulled away from him to look into his eyes.

Her startled expression wasn't fearful merely curious and slightly wary.

"Whenever you want I'll stop," He said reassuringly. "Just say the word and I'll back off."

He waited for her to nod before letting his lips fall onto hers again, this time he was gentle. Letting her lips move with his slowly, softly, until he felt her relax again. He groaned into her mouth when he felt her legs close about him, her knees hugging his hips while her feet rubbed along the backs of his thighs.

Carefully he pressed more firmly into her, his erection sliding against the core of her. Lily moaned into his mouth and James felt her shiver at the contact. He continued the motion back and forth rubbing himself against her, only the thin layers of their pajama bottoms separating them from each other. He couldn't get enough of the feeling.

Reaching down between them he lifted her shirt hem running his hand along her side up to her ribs and back down to her hip again and again.

"Take it off." She breathed breaking away from his lips.

He didn't need telling twice. Leaning up he pulled the soft black tank top up and over her head throwing it down on the floor next to him. She was a vision in her black bra and James couldn't keep himself from reaching out to cup her.

J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L J&L

Lily panted as he moved his lips across the newly exposed skin above her breasts while his hand rubbed her through the material of her bra.

Her hands seemed to have a mind of their own as they roamed across the bare skin of his chest and down his abs. Then up again across the wide expanse of his back and shoulders. She wanted things she wasn't sure of. Her body was screaming for something that was out of her realm of experience. He had stopped rocking his hips against her when she'd asked him to take her shirt off and she found that she missed the motion and was now craving it. The ache in her belly only grew as he ran his hand over her breast and placed hot open mouthed kisses along her exposed skin. When his tongue moved to slowly lick the valley between her breasts she began to instinctively move against him.

As she pressed herself up against the length of him he growled throatily and Lily shivered at the sound.

He reached out and pulled the strap of her bra off her left shoulder and then did the same with the right. He had lifted his head and his eyes stayed on hers the entire time, his pupils big and dark and his gaze hot enough to make her heart beat faster. He continued to tug bit by bit until the cups rested barely above her nipples; the question was there in his eyes as he looked down at her. She wouldn't recall later on making a clear decision about it but she found herself reaching back and undoing the clasp and pulling the fabric free of her body.

The look on James' face was one of complete reverence and wonder. She had kind of expected him to reach out and grab her the first chance he got but he surprised her at first by drinking in the sight of her as if he'd never seen anything like it in his life. Lily had to keep her hands locked firmly at her sides while he stared. She wasn't totally sure of herself by any means and it was the first time anyone had seen her topless since she was little but she allowed him to look his fill hoping that he liked what he saw. He surprised her again when he relaxed his arms and let his upper body come down until the weight of his chest was pressed up against her own.

"You're beautiful." He whispered his eyes locked with hers as he held her to him tightly.

She smiled against his mouth as he began to kiss her tenderly.

He moved gently, worshiping her as his lips moved further south. Shivers raced along her skin every time his lips slid lower.

By the time he reached the center of her sternum she was nearly shaking with need. She needed to know what it felt like to have his mouth closed about her, wanted to know what it was like to have him kiss her there. When he licked the underside of her right breast in a long slow movement she moaned aloud begging him for more. Her skin prickled with awareness, everywhere she was pressed up against him was hot. Her breasts felt heavy and more sensitive than they ever had before in her life and when his mouth finally closed about her nipple she gasped and grabbed the back of his head holding him to her.

She needed him to keep going. To keep licking, kissing, touching, moving. She wasn't aware of when she'd started grinding against him again. Or of when she'd started to move her feet against the back of his thighs in time with the movements of her hips, she was only aware that every so often his lips would stop moving as he made harsh sounds.

As he adored her breasts moving from one to the other and testing out different things, flicking his tongue, sucking lightly, blowing gently, Lily began to feel something building within her. An instinctual need to keep moving, keep pressing herself into him until…

Suddenly James was pulling back and groaning into the crook of her neck and shoulder his whole body shaking as he pushed his hips against hers even more forcefully as if he were trying to pin hers down to keep them still.

"Lily." He growled his breathing harsh. "You've got to…wait, I…"

Before he could get out whatever she wanted to say she felt him shudder and grip her tightly as she kept pushing against him. Somewhere in the middle of it she realized he was finishing. His orgasm ripping over him violently as he held her tightly.

She felt the moment it was over as his form melted into hers, resting on top of her as if all the bones had been removed from his body, even though he was all hardness and angles. They were both breathing hard their chests moving up and down with the force of it.

Lily was still feeling dazed, her body barely starting to relax and her stomach unknot itself when James pushed himself up and rolled off her to lay at her side. She instantly wanted him to come back and continue keeping her warm.

"Damn Lily." He said softly rubbing a hand over his face. "I didn't…"

She rolled onto her side so that she could look at him clearly.

"You didn't what?" She questioned with a smile.

James sighed. "I didn't mean for that to happen that way."

Lily frowned instantly feeling worried. "Did I…was it not what you expected? Did I do something I shouldn't have?"

"No…hell no. You were perfect. Merlin were you perfect." James breathed rolling over so that he could drape an arm over her and place his hand between her shoulder blades. "I just didn't mean to…"

He trailed off his tone shy and Lily finally understood.

"Are you embarrassed because you finished?" She asked knowingly, reaching up to run her fingers along his jaw.

"A bit." He admitted, his eyes still dark and hot boring into hers. "Mostly I'm upset I finished and you didn't."

Lily smiled reassuringly. "I'm glad I made you feel good. I don't think I'll be so nervous anymore. Not now that I know how much you enjoy it." She bit her lip before adding softly. "And there's always next time for me."

James smiled genuinely and sat up grabbing his wand from the bedside table. He reached down and grabbed her shirt off the floor handing it to her as he stood up.

"I'm going to go clean up. Stay here okay. I'll be right back."

Lily nodded and did as she was told holding her shirt to her chest as he disappeared through the doorway. She flopped back onto the bed once he was out of sight and bit her lip to keep from grinning from ear to ear.

Merlin that had been something. She closed her eyes as relived the whole thing in her mind trying to commit it permanently into her to memory.

She had just finished pulling her shirt on and climbing beneath his covers when he walked back in looking shy but totally happy. He climbed in next to her and wrapped his arms about her pulling her back up against his front and tucking her head underneath his chin.

"You're amazing." He said his tone dreamy. "I knew things would be great with you but that was…something else."

Lily smiled and entwined her fingers with his where they rested against her stomach.

"It felt good." She said sighing in contentment.

James chuckled and she liked feeling the vibrations against her back.

"It felt too good. I can't believe I…"

"Hush." Lily admonished turning about so that she was facing him. "I loved it. Don't spoil it."

James smiled and ran his hand through her silky hair.

"You are everything I've ever wanted Lily Evans." He said seriously, the depth of his emotion evident in his eyes.

"You are everything I never knew I needed James Potter." She answered back closing her eyes and snuggling closer to him.

"Thankyou for tonight." James said kissing her forehead tenderly.

When Lily didn't answer James looked down to find she was already sleeping. He smiled as his chest hummed with pleasure.

The thought crossed his mind that he ought to carry her to her own room but he dismissed it nearly as soon as it appeared. He liked her right where she was.

He couldn't keep his eyes off of her as he thought over what he was feeling. She had been absolutely incredible. He felt more relaxed and at ease than he had in a long time. Things were more perfect than he ever could have thought they would be. Lily was here in his arms and in his bed and he had never been happier in his entire life.

He was ridiculously in love with her.

His smiled softened as he let sleep claim him.

* * *

**Pretty Please Review!**


	23. Chapter 23

**Author's Note:**

**So I want to thank all of you who reviewed Chapter 22! I'm really glad you are all enjoying things so much :) Please keep letting me know what you think. You motivate me to keep going and I genuinely appreciate you all for it!**

**I want to point out (in regard to the last chapter) that I am very aware that Bridal Showers are not as common a practice in the UK as they are in America, however with the way I've laid out this story it was the best fit for me to have Lily do this rather than host the Bachelorette party (aka Hen's night). So sorry if that bothers anyone or if anyone found it odd.**

**Also in regard to this chapter, I'm very sorry if it has a jumbled up feel. I began it with good intentions and then it quickly turned in to the chapter from hell as I couldn't get myself to like it no matter what I did. Thus it has been changed four times, parts have been cut for later use, parts have been tossed out entirely, I didn't include parts that I intended to and well...let's just say you should all be glad I'm posting it so that we can get past this one together and move on to less stressful, more enjoyable things. ****Don't get me wrong there are parts of this that are very enjoyable and most of the content is rather necessary but I'm just rather in dislike of this chapter now that it has caused me so many ugly headaches. **

**With that in mind try not to be too critical of this one and hopefully you like it for what it is. I'm off to take a few aspirin.**

**-Valkyrie3**

**Chapter 23**

**The Good, the Bad, Regrets and Realizations**

James woke late the next morning. His groggy memory began to reproduce the events of the night before and he slowly began to smile. He then remembered Lily slipping out of bed in the early hours of dawn, her kiss soft and sweet as she told him she'd see him later. It was definitely a good start to the day.

He did his best all throughout that morning to keep the specifics of what he and Lily had done a secret, but the second he'd been alone with him Sirius had called him on it.

"So what exactly did you get up to then?" He demanded after he'd shoved James unceremoniously up the staircase and into the seventh year boys' dormitory during their free period.

"I don't know what you're talking about." James answered back innocently.

"Oh please. You could tattoo 'Lily Evans has Fantastic Breasts' across you're forehead and there's a possibility that it would be less obvious." Sirius muttered.

James flushed slightly but grinned as he flopped back onto Remus' four-poster.

"So I'm right then." Sirius stated when James didn't say anything.

"They don't make them better." James answered cheekily.

"I figured that was what had happened. You two have been making lovey eyes at each other all throughout our classes today." Sirius said grinning.

James smiled impishly as he sat up and eyed his best friend with interest.

"And what about you?"

"What about me?"Sirius retorted his eyebrow coming up defensively.

"Just how are Miss McKinnon's assets treating you?" James said chuckling. "And don't even try to lie to me. If you expect me to believe those crap stories you keep spouting about studying then you've obviously forgotten how well I know you. I know when you have a girl and I know for a fact that it's McKinnon. She's been all flustered around you lately and she keeps coming up with excuses when Lily and the girls hang out."

"You pieced all that together did you?" Sirius said sounding guarded but impressed.

James nodded. "I also noticed how you practically jumped her in the Great Hall the day she wore that tight sweater. You followed after her so fast I was surprised none of the others picked up on it."

"Well I couldn't very well let her walk around looking like that now could I? Blokes might get the wrong idea."

"Oh yes and I'm sure you needed to relieve her of it at the first available opportunity. It couldn't possibly have waited until you got back to the common room." James chortled.

Sirius grinned at the memory of getting off with Marlene behind a tapestry on the third floor, but then sighed tiredly and sat down across from James.

"I don't know what to do mate." He admitted dropping his head into his hands. "I would never in a million years have expected her to like me back but she does. She makes me feel more alive you know."

James nodded. "I know exactly what you mean."

"We don't want to make anything of it yet. We're trying to keep things quiet. Keep it low key. In most regards anyway." Sirius said his cheeks reddening as he looked over at James.

"Well I'm happy you are finally giving it a go and I'll keep it to myself if that's what you like."

Sirius nodded. "Thanks mate. So you and Evans have certainly gotten a bit closer haven't you?"

"A bit." James agreed nodding. "Enough that I've decided I'm never going to want another girl for as long as I live."

Sirius shook his head and laughed, "You said that first year when she smiled at you at the Halloween feast."

"Well I'm even more certain of it now." James replied with a cocky smile.

* * *

Lily's friends had had a grand time with the information she had been forced to share with them after she'd appeared in their dorm asking Alice if she could have a moment. The other two, not wanting to be left out, had insisted she stay and tell them what had happened and she found that they were more excited for her than she thought they would be about something that she had considered a rather private matter.

"The thing is eventually I'm going to have to let him, um…return the favor so to speak." Lily said flushing a bit as they continued to tease and giggle and speculate on her relationship with James. "And well I'm not sure how to let him. I'm discovering I'm more self-conscious than I thought I would be."

She was then given all kinds of advice and reassurance that she didn't feel reassured her very much and some of which that she wasn't sure she wanted to take seriously. In the end she figured she would just have to muddle through it as she had been doing already and hope that James didn't find her lacking.

That evening she and James went along with their friends to the Gryffindor tower as they did some nights to study together and finish up their classwork.

They had just entered the portrait hole when James elbowed Lily and said softly, "Look over there."

She followed his gaze to where Lewis Blackmore sat in one of the large upholstered chairs. His gaze was longing as he stared at the petite girl studying with her friends a short distance away.

"Do you think I should go talk to her?" Lily asked frowning as she looked at Morene who was purposefully not looking in Lewis' direction.

She wasn't sure if anything she had to say would even help the situation. Afterall she hardly knew the younger girl and didn't want her to feel awkward.

"That's up to you. If you want to see if you can help Lewis out go ahead. I didn't promise him you would though, so you aren't under any obligation to step in." James said soothingly.

Lily looked up at him and smiled. "You know I wouldn't feel right just letting them be miserable when I might be able to shed some light on the situation. Go on and I'll catch up with you all later."

"That's my girl." He whispered sweetly, bending down to kiss her quickly before grabbing her things from her and moving off to join their friends.

Lily approached the group of fifth year girls hoping she looked casual.

"Hey Morene," She said smiling.

The younger girl looked up at her and smiled back.

"Hello Lily." She answered, her expression only slightly confused. "How're things?"

"Fairly good. Would you mind having a word?" She questioned gesturing toward a secluded corner a little ways away that was empty of students.

Morene nodded her expression curious and got up to follow along.

"Look," Lily began facing the girl and speaking quietly, "I know it is probably none of my business but I've recently learned that Lewis Blackmore is quite fond of you. Am I misinformed in that you like him as well?"

Morene's eyes widened at Lily's statement. "How did you…"

Lily waived a hand dismissively. "You know how the rumor mill works around here."

The younger girl nodded and sat down in one of the empty chairs nearby.

"I'll admit I fancied him for a bit." She answered shortly one eyebrow raised.

Lily smiled and took a seat as well. "And you're wondering what in the sodding hell I'm asking you about it for?" At Morene's answering smile Lily went on. "Well it's just that I heard that you've been reluctant to date him due to your difference in background, what with you being Muggleborn and him being a Pureblood."

She didn't have to hear Morene's answer to know the statement was true. The girl's eyes were too sad and lost looking for it not to be.

"Look," Lily went on unsure of whether what she was about to say was going to be helpful or not. "I know it can feel like there's just too much separating you from being together or from taking the steps to try and be together. With the way things are going in the wizarding world right now no one is truly certain about anything and….I'll be the first to tell you being Muggleborn isn't easy."

She took a deep breathe and rushed on. "I used to feel like there was just too large of a gap between who James was and who I was. I felt like trying to be together would just be a struggle neither of us really wanted in our lives." She paused and then added softly. "I was lying to myself."

Morene looked back at her uncertainly. "What do you mean?"

"I mean it wasn't so much that there was a huge gap between me and James or that it would be hard to be together that was keeping us apart. Of course those things are true. There is a huge difference between James and I and it is hard to be together all the time. But what was really keeping us apart is the fact that I was afraid."

She waited knowing the words would hit home with the other girl.

"It's not a crime to be afraid." Morene said finally her eyes shooting worriedly to where Lewis sat staring back at her still.

"No it's not. But it isn't fair to either him or to yourself to let the fact that you are afraid of what may or may not happen dictate whether or not you are willing to give it a try." Lily explained softly. "Just think about it okay. Think about whether or not you are staying away from him for the right reasons. Is it because there really isn't anything between you? Or is it because you are hoping that what is between you will go away so that you won't have to deal with it anymore?"

Lily looked over to where James sat. He was leaning over Dorcas' shoulder pointing out something on her essay that she obviously needed to fix. Her stomach flipped over and she couldn't keep from grinning. She was hit with the realization that she was incredibly lucky to be with him and that she was glad she had taken the risk those few months ago.

She turned back to the fifth year and smiled widely. "I'll leave you alone now but just know that despite everything. The prejudice. The rumors. The uncertainty of it all. I wouldn't trade what I've found with James for anything. I don't know where I would be if I hadn't decided to just quit being scared and give him a shot." She stood up and made to move off.

"Hey Lily," Morene called out stopping her.

She turned back and saw that the younger girl was smiling too.

"Thanks."

Lily nodded, "Any time."

As she settled down amongst her friends she tried to be subtle as she watched Morene make her way over to Lewis.

He shot up out of his chair, his expression one of shock and happiness as he stood awkwardly before her. Though she couldn't hear what was said Lily could tell by the expression on Lewis' face that he was being given the same chance Lily had given James once upon a time. She couldn't keep the silly grin off of her own face as she saw Morene step forward and throw her arms around Lewis' neck.

"Well done." James voice whispered in her ear.

She took her eyes away from the younger pair and smiled at him before cupping his jaw and kissing him softly on the cheek.

It was good to know they weren't alone.

* * *

November rolled quickly into December and James and Lily and their friends found themselves swamped with schoolwork.

"For the love of Merlin's pointy beard," Alice groaned as she scrambled to finish her Transfiguration essay while they made their way to breakfast one morning. "It's like they think we'll forget every single thing they've ever taught us just because we have a holiday coming up."

"Well it's not like we'll be wanting or trying to get much studying in." Lily said patting Alice's back sympathetically and steering the distracted girl in the right direction. "You especially will be a bit preoccupied."

Alice's eyes clouded dreamily for a moment as she said wistfully, "Ah the joys of spending time with Frank."

They took their seats at the Gryffindor table a moment later and Alice, who had apparently just reached the appropriate amount of inches on her essay, handed it over with a theatrical flourish to Dorcas for her to proof read it.

"Why isn't Lily doing this?" Dorcas asked with a teasing grin. "She's much better at it than I am."

"Because she had to edit my last four and she says she won't do this one as I've once again waited until the very last possible second for her to look it over." Alice said wrinkling her nose at Lily.

The post arrived as they were eating and Lily snatched up the Prophet that Archie brought before James had a chance to get hold of it.

"Not fair." He grumbled. "Things are never news once I read the post because you lot have already told me everything that's in it."

Lily smiled but ignored him and continued to scan the headlines until she came to one that made her pause.

MINISTRY PROPOSES MUGGLEBORN REGISTRATION AND TAXATION

By Lawrence Tollingham

_The Ministry of Magic is currently reviewing the proposition that two new acts be put into legislation. The first titled the _Muggleborn Registration and Restriction Act_ would require all witches and wizards of non-magical background to register themselves as such with the Ministry. The act would dictate that they list their name, date of birth, current residence and any familial connections to be documented for Ministry records. Along with this comes the necessity for any persons wishing to marry Muggleborns to also register as they could then claim familial ties to the Muggleborn in question. It furthermore features the creation of restrictions on hiring any Muggleborns who choose not to register themselves and would require all Muggleborn witches and wizards to provide their wands for ministry inspection to insure that they are properly registered as well. Some supporters of this act are calling for a greater increase in its restrictive purposes claiming that with the current state of affairs Muggleborns should not be permitted to work within certain areas of the Ministry itself, though at this time no new additions to the proposal have yet been submitted._

_The second act titled the _Muggleborn Safety Taxation Act_, proposes that any wizards or witches of Muggleborn lineage (or those married to such) pay a five percent higher tax than those of non-Muggle heritage. Those in favor of this claim that as Muggleborns appear to be the subject of more accidents and issues than the common witch or wizard it is only fair that the Ministry receive more tax money in order to better protect them from any mishaps or unfortunate situations that may arise. _

_The Official Undersecretary to the Minister of Magic Elfrenia Wiggins claims…_

"Lily perhaps you ought to let James have a turn at it. He…" Dorcas began nervously.

"I've already seen it." She said flatly continuing to read. The article went on to include multiple quotes from prominent witches and wizards who were in support of the new bills and few from those who were against it. Either way the article had done the damage intended.

"Seen what?" James asked confused.

There was silence around the table as Lily handed him the paper and pointed to the article she'd just finished reading. Marlene did the same to Sirius and Remus passed his to Alice who let Peter read over her shoulder.

James looked at Lily curiously before turning his attention to the Prophet.

After a time Sirius cleared his throat. "What do they mean Muggleborn's 'appear to be the subject of more accidents and issues than the common witch or wizard'?" He asked reading the sentence off the paper.

"They mean that because Voldemort and his followers are targeting Muggleborns the ministry wants them to pay a higher tax due to their having to make efforts to protect them. They just don't want to specifically say that they are currently the target of most attacks." Marlene said irritably.

"That's idiotic." Sirius frowned. "It's the Ministry's job to protect all witches and wizards. Targeting a specific group of them because they are currently the subject of prejudice and some idiot's vendetta isn't fair."

By the time James finished reading the article he was fuming.

"This is utter rubbish." He spat tossing it down and turning to Lily who was eating her waffles in silence. "I don't care what they say."

Lily slammed her fork down with a clang.

"Stop saying that." She said flatly. "It doesn't matter if you care what they say. I care."

James' eyes were blazing. "They'll never get it through the Wizengamot. Dumbledore is its head he'll…"

"It doesn't matter." Lily said quietly and sadly. "Can't you see, they've done enough just by proposing it? Soon people will be clamoring for this stuff to go through if only to make themselves feel safer. They'll put restrictions on where I can work. They'll make me submit all of my information so that they have a record of my residence, my family history, everything. People need an outlet for their fear and they are playing right into Voldemort's hands!"

James gripped her by the shoulders and forced her to look at him. "It won't last Lily. People will eventually see right. They'll realize what a madman he is and…"

Lily pulled away from him and buried her face in her hands breathing deeply to keep herself from screaming at him. Feeling frustrated she looked back up at him and said fiercely, "Don't you see what this will do? It will give him the address of every Muggleborn out there. All it would take is one corrupt person inside the ministry and he'd know where to find everyone he wanted to get rid of."

"Lily you need to…" James began his tone betraying his frustration as well.

"I need to what? Not care. Not look. Quit worrying when all of this is staring me right in the face? Tell me what I need to do? Because right now the only thing I feel like I can do is worry." She said feeling as if she wanted to hit or push James, anything to keep herself from feeling so overwhelmed.

"You won't like what I have to say." James bit out softly running a hand through his already messy hair. "You aren't ready for it. You'll panic or worse run away from me."

"For Merlin's sake James I'm panicking right now. I'm worried beyond belief that when I leave her there won't be anything out there for me. That…"

"There'll be me Lily. Damnit, when are you going to start realizing that no matter what I'm here and I'm not leaving?" He said emphatically reaching out to grip her waist.

Lily stared at him feeling furious, alone, scared, helpless, tired, a million different horrible feelings and yet, just by looking at him, she felt anchored. Like whatever came her way she could face it so long as he held her up. Kept her going. Stood by her.

His look and touch didn't keep her from feeling sick with her turning emotions, but it did keep her from falling apart because of them.

"Why do you always have to make it better?" She breathed softly, tears falling out of the corners of her eyes for a number of reasons.

He reached up and used his thumbs to wipe them away. "Because it's my job. Because it's what you need me to do."

Lily began to smile. She reached up to wipe at her cheeks more while James pulled her to him kissing her forehead.

Throughout the day Lily's mind kept going back to the article and to what it would mean for her future. Soon she would be leaving Hogwarts and with the way things were going there was a fairly good chance that she would find herself jobless and without a place in the world that she'd become accustomed to. The world she now considered to be her home.

She knew James would be there for her, yet she felt oddly irritated at the idea of not being able to be independent. She had always envisioned herself a success in the wizarding world. Now things were happening that were beyond her control and she wasn't sure she was ready to face the uncertainty that lay before her.

James for his part was quiet for most of the day as well, leaving her to brood in silence as he did a lot of brooding of his own. She wondered what he was thinking and whether or not he was beginning to realize just how large of an impact dating a Muggleborn like her might come to have on his life. She tried to remind herself of all the things she had said to Morene about being together being worth the risk, hoping all the while that James felt the way she thought he did.

Later that night they sat around the Gryffindor common room with their friends glad that the weekend was officially there. They were discussing the final Hogsmeade trip of the term when James leaned in to whisper in Lily's ear, "I want you to know something."

She turned her gaze from where Sirius was talking to look up at him, her eyes sparkling and looking if possible more brilliant than he'd ever seen them.

"You have to promise me you won't go running away scared after I say it though." James said picking her hand up and running his fingers along the length of hers.

"Alright." She agreed softly. "I won't get scared or run away."

James grinned and looked up at her the gold in his eyes dancing with the firelight.

"I would do it."

Lily looked at him in confusion. "You would do what?"

"Register."

Lily grabbed his jaw and looked at him seriously. "What are you talking about?"

James kissed the inside of her palm and said softly, "I would register if I had to. If you decided to go along with it that is."  
There was a very full silence between them as they both processed what he was saying.

"I would do whatever it took in order to be able to be with you." He added his breath whispering across her skin.

"James…" All the air escaped Lily's chest as she stared into the depths of his golden brown eyes. Her heart was hammering wildly and she couldn't seem to find her voice. He was talking about marrying her. Not in so many words but essentially that was what he was telling her. That he was willing to do what needed to be done with the Ministry in order to _marry_ her for Merlin's sake.

"You don't have to say anything." He whispered wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. "I just wanted you to know."

Lily smiled softly but nervously at him as he pulled her into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing herself as close as she could.

She didn't know what to say exactly. They hadn't given each other any kind of deep emotional declarations of any kind yet and though she knew she felt strongly for James and she didn't doubt that he felt the same for her she still wasn't sure what voicing those feelings would cause. Or how it would change things between them.

Nevertheless she knew that the look in his eye was one of determination. He was serious about her in a way that warmed her heart and made her feel adored.

"Want to get out of here?" He asked quietly, a pleading tone in his voice.

Lily watched as his eyes began to smolder, the look in them sending a wave of heat straight to her lower belly. She nodded in answer and slid off his lap, very aware as she did so of the warmth that was already beginning to seep from his body into hers.

"We're going to turn in." James announced to the group at large. "We'll see you all tomorrow."

Their friends called their goodbyes and exchanged amused glances as they watched Lily and James gather their things and head for the portrait hole, their eyes hot and dark with desire.

* * *

James didn't want to wait until they were all the way back to their common room. He pulled Lily into the first secret passageway they happened upon and pushed her up against wall.

His arms moved about her waist as he caught her lips with his own. He pressed himself against her and began to show her without words that he wanted her with an unchecked passion.

"James." Her breath whispered across his jaw as he moved to her neck.

His hands came up to the hem of her jumper and he leaned back so that he could tug it over her head. He then went to work on the buttons of her blouse. He could feel his chest pumping like a bellows and his hands were shaking more than he would have thought but he couldn't keep them still.

Ever since he had read through the article that morning all he could think about was his future with her and what he wanted. The Ministry could go to hell for all he cared if they were going to start enacting legislation against Muggleborns. If she couldn't find a job he would take care of her. If they demanded that he register in order to marry her then fine, he would do that too. He would do anything, _anything _to keep her in his life. And he wanted to keep her in his life.

He was more serious about being with her than he'd ever been about anything before. He was going to marry her. He remembered voicing the words to Lionel in the Leaky Cauldron and he hadn't understood then exactly what it was he was committing himself to or declaring. But he knew now and he was more than ready for what came next.

He had always been so sure of her. Himself he had doubted more times than he could count, but he'd never waivered in his conviction that she was his ideal. The thing he wanted most in the world but least deserved. But now she was his. Everything else no longer mattered.

As he removed her shirt revealing a lacy white bra that pushed her breasts up invitingly he felt as if he'd been punched in the stomach. He wanted her so badly it was making his insides twist.

He pulled his own jumper off swiftly and his shirt rapidly followed. His gaze roamed Lily's figure as he reached boldly for her skirt. She didn't protest as he undid the buttons and let the material drop to the floor at her feet.

His gaze roamed over her taking in all the newly revealed skin as he came to the realization once again that his imagination had nothing on what she looked like in reality.

She bit her lip shyly but stayed put as he knelt in front of her and began to remove her shoes and knee high stockings. She was so bloody sexy it took everything he had not to reach for the fly of his trousers and relieve some of the pressure that had built there.

He ran his hands up her legs as he stood slowly his fingers skimming over the smooth skin and brushing along the lacy white knickers she wore along the way.

He pulled her body up against his, recapturing her lips. Devouring her, savoring the taste that was becoming such a vital part of his existence. His tongue moved along hers, stroking and teasing her until she reached out and grabbed onto his waist to keep steady.

She broke away and gasped roughly, "What are we doing?"

James grinned at her and gripping her wrist led her hand to his groin. He pushed her palm against his erection growling, "We're loving each other."

She opened her mouth, her eyes widening at the contact, to speak again but he shushed her and pressed himself more firmly into her palm. "No talking. Just touch me."

He waited with baited breath while she considered and then choked on a groan when she began to run the hand that was pressed against him up and down. The sweetest torture he had ever felt was being touched by Lily like he was now.

James let her get accustomed to him for a bit, even as he grew accustomed to being touched by her, before leaning down to run his lips along her collar bone, sucking gently on the skin that he knew was sensitive. His name left her lips on a sigh once again and he put his right hand on her ribs, resting his spare forearm against the wall next to her head. He ran his palm down her side following the curve of her waist and then across her belly and back, admiring the taught flatness of her stomach. He then trailed his fingers over her hip bone before letting the tips come to rest against the line of her knickers. She faltered slightly her hand gripping him a bit tighter but she didn't speak or pull away. He inhaled against her skin and lifted his head to look into her eyes.

"Whatever you want okay." He reassured her gently.

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his in an unspoken invitation to continue.

James' heart was beating around in his chest like a trapped bludger and his hand was still shaking a bit as he followed the line of her underwear back and forth across her lower abdomen. He kissed her more fiercely as he began to inch in toward the middle again. His fingers had just dipped below the band reaching for her when she broke away suddenly.

"Stop. Please." She breathed sounding scared.

He immediately removed his hand reaching out to place it on her hip instead.

She was shaking like mad and he inwardly cursed himself.

"It's alright Lily." He said sincerely pulling back to look into her eyes and squeezing her hip firmly. "I'll stop."

She had her eyes cast downward and her hand had frozen against his cock. A part of him was begging her to recover. To find the courage to let him touch her. To let him do what he'd fantasized about doing for longer than he wanted to admit, and for her to keep touching him in return.

But her frightened gaze eventually lifted to his and he let go of anything other than the need to make her feel better.

Reaching up slowly he grabbed her chin and repeated, "It's alright Lily."  
"I'm so sorry James." She whispered sincerely.

"I'm not." He said back his voice a bit hoarse. "I enjoyed that immensely."

"But I…"

He leaned forward and silenced her softly with his lips. "You are beautiful and you make me happy."

He pulled away gently and began finding her scattered clothing piece by piece, helping her dress. He grabbed his discarded shirt off the floor and tugged it back on. Then snatching his jumper in one hand he reached for hers with the other.

"You okay?" He questioned as he laced his fingers with hers.

She nodded and let him tug her away and out into the corridor again.

When they reached their dormitory he kissed her sweetly and then pushed her toward her room, leaning against the wall as he watched her go. She said a soft goodnight and then her door clicked shut.

James let his head fall back and hit the wall in frustration.

* * *

Lily soon came to regret her decision to stop what she and James had been doing. He was more careful with her in the days following than ever before it seemed, almost as if he were worried he had crossed some sort of boundary that he shouldn't have. She soon found herself feeling tired and frustrated as classwork built up and she began to lose sleep and every day she meant to talk to him about it. To let him know she wished she would have let him keep on. Yet, she never seemed to find the right time.

As she sat in potions trying to focus on what she should be doing she found her thoughts kept returning to her dilemma.

What had made her ask him to stop? Why had she panicked so badly? Was she really that scared of taking that step with him?

Things had been going along so smoothly. Everything had been so intense and it had felt so good. What on earth was the matter with her?

She cared about him. She wanted to be with him. In every way. She loved him. He was…

She accidentally dropped the whole wooden cup of beetles into her cauldron as she realized the path her thoughts had taken.

The potion suddenly turned an awful shade of green and began to bubble like crazy and before she knew it, it was spewing over the edge of her cauldron and onto the table burning a path into the wood.

Lily jumped back trying to avoid it, while calling out, "Professor Slughorn!"

He was at her side in an instant and after throwing an odd mixture of ingredients onto the concoction it stopped its procession along the table and turned a harmless looking sky blue once again.

"Miss Evans, are you quite alright?"

Lily looked at the potions professor apologetically. "I'm sorry sir I'm just over tired and I accidentally dropped my wooden cup into the mixture."

"That's quite alright my dear. Mistakes do happen." He reassured her, his face looking strangely disappointed. "Though I've never before seen you make one such as this."

Lily bit her lip feeling oddly conspicuous as the other students looked on.

"I'm sorry sir." She repeated. "Like I said it was just a slip of the hand from being over tired. It won't happen again."

Slughorn smiled. "I'm sure it won't my dear."

Lily waived James off as he made to move toward her and began to methodically and slowly clean up her work area. She didn't want to face him just yet. She refused to let herself think of anything but the motions of cleaning and packing as she waited for the class time to run out. She tried to remain calm but she couldn't keep herself from rushing out of the room after their lesson was over and heading straight for the loo.

Sweet Merlin she was in _love_ with James. She loved James Potter.

What was she supposed to do with that information? How was she supposed to tell him without feeling completely awkward? They had only been dating for near three months.

She was pretty sure he felt the same after all Sirius had told her he did and she had known he had liked her for a very long time before they were even together but…as she looked at her reflection in the mirror she pondered the idea of James being in love with her. Did she take the risk of telling him how she felt and hope he felt the same? Or did she keep it to herself for a bit waiting to see if maybe he would say it first? Afterall though he'd insinuated he wanted to marry her the other day, and he'd called what they had done in that passageway loving, he hadn't specifically mentioned his feelings and had yet to tell her he was in love with her either. So maybe she should just wait for him to say the words and then perhaps they wouldn't seem so daunting.

She couldn't believe it had taken her until just that moment in class to understand her own emotions. It was so strange to think on it and realize that she ad been feeling that way for quite some time and just hadn't given the thought the recognition that she should have. How pathetic of her to feel blindsided by the fact that she was in love. Weren't these things supposed to be there staring you in the face right from the start? Why had she only just owned up to what she felt for James?

Her reflection didn't help her to think at all. It just stared back at her with the horribly confused expression she must have been wearing on her face at that moment.

"Shit." She breathed as she forced herself to march out of the loo and head in the direction of their next class.

To her complete mortification James was waiting for her a little ways away.

"Hey." He asked softly coming up to wrap an arm around her. "Are you feeling alright?"

She nodded. "I'm just.." _completely, utterly, stupidly in love with you! "_…tired is all."

Oh Merlin she was definitely waiting until later to tell him. Right now she was still too confused about being in love with him to even get the words out. It was just too new of a revelation.

He squeezed her a little and said, "I'll make a kitchens run and we'll skip lunch so you can take a break after charms."

Lily felt like her face was on fire as she said, "Ya that sounds good."

"You sure you're just tired?" He asked noticing her flush.

She nodded. "Ya and a bit embarrassed after my mishap."

"Don't worry. Do some fancy charms work for him and Sluggy will be singing you're praises again in no time."

Lily forced a smile and let him guide her toward their next class.

* * *

**Review Please! **


	24. Chapter 24

**Author's Note:**

**Hello to everyone! I am so very very very very sorry that it has taken me so long to update! I know you don't want to hear excuses but my grandpa has been very sick over the holidays and I have been spending a lot of time with him. I am back in school this coming week though and am currentlly re-settled in to the house that I live in while attending it so hopefully I can get back on track with updating pretty regularly. I just want to say thankyou to all of you though for being so great about me taking so long to get my head to where I could write something I felt was worthy of your time. (Though I didn't triple check this for errors like I usually do so hopefully the grammar isn't dreadful)**

**Thankyou to everyone who reviewed chapter 23! I'm glad you liked it :)**

**Now without further blabbing from me here is the long awaited chapter 24!**

**Love you all and please Review**

**Valkyrie3**

**CHAPTER 24**

**(I couldn't come up with a good title for this one...it just wasn't happening. Suggestions are welcome lol)**

As they walked down to the village to catch the Hogwarts Express, Lily thought over her feelings about the end of term. Since she had come to the realization that she was well and truly in love with James she had been debating about what to say to him and when. She supposed the time to admit her feelings would present itself and she would hopefully just know and be able to say the words, the key word being 'hopefully'.

She also hadn't found the right time to tell him that she wished things could go back to the way they had been before. He had continued to be rather careful and slow with her, and she knew he still thought he had pushed things to far that night in the passageway and, though she wanted to talk about it and put things back in order, class work had piled up and the teachers had been overly zealous with end of the term examinations leaving her with little opportunity to say anything and little energy to worry about it.

Now as she made her way into their customary compartment after helping to get all the younger students settled in she found herself thinking about how much time she would get to spend with him over the next few weeks. She wondered if it would be too much to ask him to come visit. Afterall she would be going to visit him in order to attend the ministry affair.

She cleared her throat as she seated herself, taking her customary position on the floor at his feet.

"Um James…" She began tentatively. "I was wondering if maybe you might want to drop by my house some time soon. If you have the opportunity that is… I mean if you want to."

His expression was a mix between surprise and happiness as he questioned, "You want me to come visit you?"

She nodded smiling nervously. "I was thinking you could meet my parents."

His expression lost a bit of its delight but he still smiled at her nonetheless. "I'd like that."

"Are you certain? I mean if you don't want to meet them yet, or if you are going to be rather busy we can just find the time later on."

He shook his head still grinning. "No I'd like to meet them. That would be great. How about we plan on right before the Ministry ball, it's on New Year's Eve so I could come over the day before?"

"I'll have to check on the exact date Petunia has planned for her bridal shower but that sounds like a good enough plan." She nodded in agreement turning about and letting her back settle against the seat between his knees.

After a somewhat awkward moment of silence between them James asked, "So is there anything I should or shouldn't do?"

"What do you mean?" Lily returned, turning to face him once again.

"Well as your family is…Since they aren't used to…" He sighed and said rather sheepishly. "I don't want to make an idiot of myself in front of them. So is there any advice you have as far as what to say or not to say? Or how to act?"

Lily smiled. It was nice that he was wanted to do what he could to make a good first impression.

"Well they are Muggles but they are used to hearing about magic, so that won't be a problem. You can explain whatever they don't understand if it comes up in conversation. I would wear Muggle attire as they aren't really accustomed to wizard's robes, but that shouldn't be a problem either as you do that rather often." Lily paused thoughtfully and then added. "My dad will probably try to break your hand when he shakes it, so be prepared."

James looked startled. "What?"

"It's a dad thing." She said shrugging. "He did it to Vernon so I'm only guessing that he'll do it to you as well. It's sort of a test. I mean at least I think that's what he's doing. It's nonsense if you ask me but I'm just telling you so that you know what to expect."

"And how do you suggest I prepare myself for your dad trying to break my hand?" James asked quirking an eyebrow.

"I don't know. It's a guy thing. You figure it out." Lily said chuckling. "And also my mum will feed you like crazy if you let her. So at some point you will have to just say 'no' that you don't want anymore food. Otherwise she'll make you sick."

"But why…"  
Lily ignored him and went on. "And whatever you do don't eat anything my dad tries to cook, unless it's from the grill. Anything else is pure poison I swear, though he thinks he's a decent chef. And you should probably mention how nice the garden looks. They are rather fond of it and my dad puts a lot of work into it. Oh and if Petunia is there, which very likely she will be, you might want to tone down any talk of magic and what not. She's rather touchy about it."

James looked at Lily worriedly.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

She smiled at him. "You'll be fine James. You can't do any worse than me. I literally ran into both your mum and your dad before ever having been introduced. And when I was supposed to finally meet them and spend some time at your house, I vomited on your mother's favorite carpet."

"None of that matters." He told her seriously. "They like you."

"And my parents will like you." She said honestly. "Just be yourself."

He nodded and let her turn back around, but Lily didn't miss the look on near panic he shot Sirius.

She bit her lip to keep from giggling.

* * *

As they made their way off the train James kept Lily close to him, one arm slung over her shoulders.

"I'm going to miss you." She said softly.

His chest tightened a bit at the words and he dipped his head down to press a kiss to her temple.

"I'm going to miss you too."

They walked together toward the barrier between the platforms in silence, both he was sure reflecting on the time apart that was ahead of them. It was strange to think that they'd been together everyday since they'd started dating. He knew that in a normal, outside, adult relationship they would have had days here and there when they wouldn't see each other, when things would seem all the more intense due to the day or two that they had spent waiting to see the other person again. But they hadn't had that sort of beginning and now he wondered what being apart would feel like.

"You'll write won't you?" Lily said stopping when they were almost to the barrier and turning to face him.

James smiled and wrapped his arms about her.

"Of course I will."

She sighed and let her arms slip around his neck.

"I've decided I don't like this." She told him biting her lip. "I don't want to learn what it feels like to be apart. We've done so well being together all the time."

James smiled at the words that mirrored his own thoughts. There wasn't really much to say as neither of them knew what new aspects and feelings their short time apart would bring.

It was now though, as they were about to go their separate ways, that he wished he had been a bit more enthusiastic with her toward the end of the term. He'd wanted her all the time, so much so that it had become a near constant burn in his lower stomach. Yet, he'd done his best to be more respectful, slower, less intense. She hadn't been ready for what had gone on in the passageway and he had felt like he'd scared her to the point that he should back off. So he'd been less aggressive. He hadn't once tried to remove any of her clothing or touch her in any place he thought might make her hesitant.

And as a result she'd haunted his dreams. The most vivid, forceful, erotic dreams he'd ever had in his life. They'd been torturous. More than once he'd had to jump into the shower at odd times of the night to keep himself from running into her room and waking her up and…

He looked down at the girl in his arms and knew that he should have given in to a few of those moments. He should have done more to show her just how much he wanted her, how much his whole body ached and begged for her. Because now he was faced with being away for awhile and there was still so much that needed to be said and done and felt between them.

"It's only a little more than a week before I'll see you again. Just after Christmas really. I'll be at your house on December the thirtieth bright and early if it all works out." He said, reassuring himself as much as her.

"It seems rather daunting when it shouldn't doesn't it?" She breathed, resting her head against his chest.

He nodded. "It won't be so bad. You'll get to spend time with your family. I'll get to let my parents drive me absolutely mad with all their nonsense and before we know it we'll be right back here." He squeezed her for emphasis, letting her know that he meant 'here' as in together.

She lifted her head and smiled up at him. "You won't go standing under the mistletoe with any other pretty witches now will you?"

"I would never." He said back mock seriously. "My mistletoe days are over I'm afraid. Unless the witch underneath it happens to be a rather petite redhead that goes by the name of Lily Evans."

She grinned and cupped his face pulling him down and reaching up on her tiptoes to kiss him lightly.

"I miss you already James."

He grinned and pulled her to him tightly, lifting her up off the floor.

"I'm still right here." He said, enjoying the way her brilliant eyes sparkled as she looked at him. "And that was not a proper goodbye kiss."

"It wasn't?" She asked playfully.

He shook his head and reached up with one hand to cup her cheek. "Come here."

She sighed softly as he claimed her lips. Merlin, he loved that sound.

Holding her tightly he proceeded to show her just how much he was going to miss her. Kissing her slowly at first, letting his lips glide across hers. After a time he pulled at her bottom lip biting it gently, drinking in the soft sound she made like it was his life source. Wanting to hear more he swept his tongue along her bottom lip and took full advantage when she opened her mouth for him.

As he kissed her deeply, loving the way she tasted, he realized faintly that they were probably making a spectacle of themselves but he didn't care. He kissed her forcefully, trying to impart how much he needed her, wanted her, and was going to miss her. Letting her feel how profoundly she affected him.

When he finally began to pull away, coming back a few times to kiss her softly once more, he found that it was more difficult than he would have imagined it would be to place her feet back on the floor and let her step away from him so that she could go home.

They didn't say anything as she made sure she had all of her things before walking slowly toward the barrier between platforms and disappearing from sight. What could they say? There weren't words…or at least he didn't think they were ready for the words…to express what they wanted to say to each other. So they left it at kissing each other goodbye.

Damn but he already wanted her back in his arms.

* * *

As Lily stepped through the front door of her house, held open for her by her dad, her senses were overwhelmed. There was blue and silver _everywhere_! It was all over the living room and the entry table and as she made her way toward the kitchen she could see that it took up dining table as well and was spread all over the counters.

She stepped forward to examine some of it and found that it was of course various wedding items. Leftover invitations, tulle, decorations meant for the bridal shower, fabric from dresses…

"Is all of this for the wedding?" She questioned.

Her dad nodded rolling his eyes as her mother answered sweetly, "Yes dear Petunia has been hard at work planning. She wants every last detail to be perfect on her big day."

Lily nodded and then proceeded to follow her father up the stairs to her bedroom where he was depositing her things.

"Thanks dad."

"No problem sweet." He answered pulling her in for a hug. "I've missed you around here. With all this wedding stuff going on I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed."

Lily chuckled. "It did look like they've gone a bit overboard."

Harold Evans nodded. "I swear if this wedding doesn't bankrupt me I'll die a happy man."

He kept Lily with him as they made their way back down the stairs, steering them into the living room and clearing the sofa of wedding paraphernalia for them to sit down.

"So what's all this I hear about you having a boyfriend?"

Lily smiled softly. Her dad had always been so straightforward.

When she was little he'd of course looked like a giant that would take on the world if she asked him to. When she got a little older he became her co-conspirator in many of her more vigorous games of make-believe. When she'd outgrown the pretend he'd been the one to take her to places her mother wasn't interested in, like to ride roller-coasters or to see the animals in the London Zoo. Then when she'd gone off to school he'd been the one to always make her feel like she was perfectly normal when she came back home, as if nothing were different about her despite the fact that she was a witch who could do magic. She had always had a different type of relationship with him than she had with her mother. Her dad was more like her in many ways.

"What do you want to know about him?" She asked quirking an eyebrow.

"Your mother says he's handsome…"

Lily nodded. "He is."

"And rich…"

She nodded again. "His parents certainly are."

"And that he's rather popular…"  
"What are you getting at dad?" She asked curious as to what he was leading up to.

"I'm just trying to figure out if he's the sort of fellow I want dating my daughter is all." Her dad insisted holding up his hands.

Lily looked at him shaking her head. His hair had turned an even lighter shade of steely grey since the last time she seen him, though it had been gray for a long while since. Yet, despite his age he was still a rather handsome man. He still had good bone structure and the few wrinkles he did possess were mostly about his eyes giving one the impression of his being good humored. He was still mostly fit and rather active and Lily found that she was happy he was so healthy and content. She knew though that her being in a relationship made him feel a bit off-kilter.

"He is a good sort dad. He tried for years to get me to go out with him and I always said no. I had my reasons for that though. He was rather immature and wasn't always the sort one would consider a good role model for others. Then the summer before sixth year he wrote me a letter explaining that he was going to try and change his behavior for the better. Surprisingly, despite all my misgivings about him being able to really change, he managed it. He somehow managed to keep all his mischievous aspects but tone down all the nonsense. He was made Head Boy this year." Lily explained.

It felt a bit odd to look back at where she and James had once been. It seemed so much time had gone by since September and yet when she really thought about it she realized it hadn't even been half a year since they had been together.

"He asked me out again in September and that time I agreed. I'm actually rather happy with him." She admitted blushing.

Her dad shook his head and sighed. "Well I can't say I like it much, you dating some young pup, but I suppose if he has changed like you said and really is a decent lad I can't brook much protest can I?"

Lily slid along the sofa until she was next to him and tucked herself into his side, laying his arm over her shoulders.

"Did mum tell you he's coming to visit?"

Her father nodded.

"Do you promise to try and be nice to him?"

She felt him reluctantly nod against her head again.

"Thanks Dad. I think you'll really like him. He really is a great guy." She said leaning further into her dad and letting his smell wash over her.

Feeling like she was five year old again she fell asleep against his side.

* * *

James felt his stomach tighten at the thought of Lily.

It was starting to get ridiculous how much he missed her. He had done his best to distract himself over the first few days, going on outings with his parents, spending time with his friends when they were over and just with Sirius when the others were busy, going Christmas shopping in Diagon Alley (where he'd annoyed Sirius to no end by hoping all day long that he would run into Lily) and all manner of little things to keep his mind off of her.

It was when his dad had walked in on him reorganizing his room the day before that he realized just how pathetic he really was.

"Um hey son. What's all this?" Jason had asked as he stepped into the chaos that came along with James' organizing.

"Just trying to arrange things a little," he had responded with a shrug.

"I see…" his dad mused fighting a grin. "This wouldn't have anything to do with trying to keep yourself preoccupied so that you won't think about Lily would it?"

James had scoffed. "Of course not. It just badly needed doing, I mean I can't find anything in here. I've already discovered four missing socks, two spare quills, a rather valuable chocolate frog card, some…ugh alright yes! This has everything to do with trying not to think about Lily." He looked at his dad sheepishly, "Pretty pathetic huh?"

Jason shrugged, chuckling softly. "Not really. I used to be the same way when your mother and I were apart. It took us a while to get comfortable enough with our relationship to not feel like the world was coming to an end if we weren't in the same place."

"I don't think the world is going to end. I just feel like it would be a whole lot more interesting if Lily were to just up and apparate into my room…like say right this second." James said moving to place some books back onto the shelf, using more force than was necessary.

"Well if you want you could come to the match with me. Puddlemere's playing Falmouth." His dad provided holding up the tickets for his inspection.

James felt a grin break over his face.

"Have I told you recently that you're the best dad a bloke could ask for?"

"You certainly have not, though Sirius did inform me of it ten minutes ago when I presented him with his ticket. And your mum told me something similar though of a different nature, which I won't repeat, when I gave her hers yesterday evening."

James abandoned his room saying jovially, "I suppose if there's anything that will get my mind off Lily it's a good match."

Unfortunately he spent a fairly decent though not ridiculously obsessive portion of the match wishing he could have had Lily with him as he knew she would have enjoyed it. He really and truly was pathetically in love with her.

On Christmas morning he opened her gift, not quite sure about what he had received.

"Well James," his mother asked smiling brightly, "is your gift from Lily as good as last year?"

James shrugged. "I'm not quite sure what it is yet."

He pulled out the four tickets that lay on the top and then opened up the parchment that lay underneath them.

_James,_

_Hope you like these. I know you are probably wildly confused. These are tickets to a Muggle cinema in London. There is a film opening up on the 27__th__ that is rumoured to be absolutely amazing! I know this gift probably won't live up to the previous Christmas but I thought that since my dad had the opportunity to get the tickets through his company that you and Sirius and your parents could come to see it with us. It would give you the opportunity to meet my dad before you come over later in the week and it would also give you the chance to do something Muggle with me. _

_Anyway just keep a hold of the tickets and if you can't make it just let me know. I have another gift in mind if this one doesn't work out. I really hope you aren't too dreadfully disappointed and that the film will actually hold up to all the hype. _

_I miss you. Quite terribly in fact._

_I can't wait to see you in a few days. _

_Love,_

_Lily_

"So what is it?" Sirius asked after James put the letter down.

He looked over at his best friend and realized he was smiling so widely his cheeks hurt.

"She got me tickets. Actually she got all of us tickets. To go to see a Muggle film with her and her dad." James replied.

"Those things she explained to us. Where you watch people act out a story on a giant felly-vision."

"Television." James corrected. "And yes. It's to some movie that she says is rumoured to be really good. The tickets are for the twenty-seventh of December at 5 pm." James turned to his mum and dad. "And there are four of them."  
His dad smiled. "I could probably manage that. I think I work the night before but I can get some rest in and go with you."

Charlotte frowned, looking disappointed. "I don't know if I can make it James. I promised Mafalda Hopkirk I'd have my reports on improper magic use at sporting events ready by the twenty-eighth. It's going to be dreadful going over all those submissions. I've been putting it off and now I wish I would have just gotten it over with."

"That's alright mum." James assured her. "Maybe we can see if Moony wants to come."

"That's a great idea. I'm sure he'd love to. He'll be all chipper about that time." Sirius agreed enthusiastically.

"Well that settles it then." His dad said smiling. "I'm actually rather excited. I've never been to this sort of thing before."

James' mum looked at him pouting. "Don't you dare try and rub this in."

Jason grinned and reached out to pull her closer. "Aww Char. I'm sure it won't be as amazing as we are thinking it's going to be."

"Ya," Sirius said eyeing the ticket James had handed him doubtfully. "I mean what kind of a war can stars have anyway?"

* * *

**REVIEW! Pretty please...**


	25. Chapter 25

**Hello to everyone after a very long time away! I'm very sorry to those of you who follow this story so closely! But in the last two years a lot has gone on in my life and I didn't have the time to focus on or commit to this story. This chapter is short but I'm trying to get back into the swing of things. **

**Hope you enjoy it!**

**Lots of Love and Thanks to all of you! And as always please review!**

**-Valkyrie3**

**Light Sabers and Gnomeholes**

**Chapter 25**

Lily tried to be as slow and methodical getting dressed as she could. Yet, she still found herself fully clad and ready to go twenty minutes before Sirius, James and Mr. Potter were due to arrive.

"Oh Lily dear," her mother exclaimed when she saw her. "You look lovely."

She frowned. "I look the same as always mum."

"Perhaps it's the fact that your boyfriend will be here soon then, that's making you look so rosy." Her mum replied teasingly.

Lily rolled her eyes and left the kitchen to go and pace in the living room. Petunia had conveniently remembered she had something to do with Vernon regarding the wedding when Lily had mentioned that her friends would be coming to the house before they left for the theatre. Though, Lily did have to admit that her sister didn't make any of the usual snide comments about wizards and magic before she left. They were making progress she supposed. After all they hadn't fought once since Lily had come home from school and they had even been getting along rather well when planning out Petunia's bridal party.

On Christmas when Lily had opened up James' present to see that he had gotten her a bracelet to match her necklace, while her mother was exclaiming over how beautiful it was, Petunia merely smiled and tried to look pleased for her.

So when Petunia had opened up Vernon's gift for her to reveal the ugliest fur coat Lily had ever seen, she had smiled and said kindly, "That was very thoughtful of him. I'm sure he's realized how cold it's been out and noticed that all your other coats are getting worn."

Petunia had smiled brightly and said rather emotionally, "I daresay he did."

Christmas that year had been very near what it was like when they were young. Lily had been almost sad to see it end.

Her dad appeared at some point and smiled at all her pacing.

"There's no need to wear out the carpet. I'm sure things are going to go along all right."

"Dad, thank you for doing this." She said sincerely. "It means a lot to me that you are willing to try and get to know James and his family."

"It's no problem kiddo. It is pretty obvious you care about the lad and judging by the pretty trinkets you've gotten for Christmas two years in a row I'd say he's rather fond of you as well."

Just then the doorbell rang and Lily, who had been a jumble of nervous energy only a moment before, froze.

Her father chuckled in amusement.

"Don't you think you'd better get that before your mother does?"

With those words Lily sprang into action and rushed toward the door. Her mother was visible making her way toward it and Lily sighed in relief when she yanked it open.

The sight that met her eyes made her smile. Mr. Potter stood in front grinning at her and trying not to look exasperated with James, who he was holding back from rushing toward Lily by keeping a hand on his chest. Sirius and Remus stood a little behind them and the latter was keeping the former from pushing Lily's doorbell again.

"Hello Lily." Jason said, still struggling to keep James back behind him.

"Hello. Please come in its rather cold out there." She instructed trying not to laugh as Jason's hand had to change operatives and was now working to drag a rather nervous looking James forward and into the house.

Once the four of them were inside Lily closed the door behind them and stepped around them to introduce her parents.

"It's lovely to meet you officially." Her mum said brightly shaking James' dad's hand. "Lily's told us so much about you all."

"You as well." Jason replied genuinely. "My coming to inform you that Lily wasn't feeling well while at our house wasn't a very great beginning afterall."

"We were just glad she was in such good hands." Her mother replied before turning her attention to the three teenage boys gathered in front of her.

Lily had to fight the urge to laugh as she had the silly thought that it was probably more testosterone than her mother had ever faced in her lifetime.

"So let me try and get this straight. You must be Sirius," She said pointing correctly at him. "And that would make you Remus." She said gesturing to him, as he nodded. "And you," She turned to James. "Are very obviously your father's son."

Lily took deep worried breaths as her mother met her boyfriend for the first time.

"We do look a bit alike." James agreed and offered her his hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Evans."

"You as well dear." Her mother replied.

_Wait for it…_

"Lily seems quite smitten with you. It's nice to finally put a face to the gorgeous young man she's been describing."

_And there it was!_

Lily wished a hole would open up in the carpet to swallow her, as she did her best to avoid the amused looks coming from her friends.

"Rose." Her father cut in. "Let's at least act like we don't want to embarrass our daughter in front of her boyfriend shall we. I'm sure there'll be plenty of time to be obvious about it later."

Lily sighed with relief, thankful once again that it would be her dad accompanying them and not her mother. She loved her mum, but like all mums the woman could just be downright mortifying.

"It's nice to meet you James," her dad said sticking out his hand.

"You as well sir." James replied offering his up without hesitation.

Lily tried not to wince as the two no doubt gripped each other's hands with enough force to strangle a hippogriff. She sighed in relief when they let each other go.

"Well now that we've all met, can I offer you all some tea or…"

"Mum we've got to go remember? It starts at five. And there is no doubt going to be a huge crowd." Lily reminded her.

"She's right Rose. We'll be needing to get moving." Her father agreed.

"I'm sure you are all very excited." Her mother went on as Lily and her father collected their coats. "Lily says you've all never been to see a film before. It is going to be quite exciting for you I imagine."

As James' dad answered her Lily was surprised to feel a pair of strong hands helping her into her coat. She turned her head to see James standing behind her.

"Thank you." She said softly as the colony of normally sleeping butterflies in her stomach deciding to take flight.

"You're welcome." He replied just as softly.

"Alright boys," James' dad directed. "Let's get going."  
Lily and her father followed them out and James' dad helped everyone get situated into her dad's Ford Consul and they were off.

J&L&J&L&J&L&J&L&J&L&J&L

As they exited the theater James knew his face must look comical. He looked to his left and was happy to see Sirius and Remus were wearing similar expressions of complete and utter shock.

"Wow." James' dad said shaking his head. "That was really something."

"It sure was. I wouldn't recommend going to another movie for a while." Mr. Evans advised. "That was pretty much incredible."

"So they aren't all like that then?" Remus asked, his voice hoarse from disuse.

"No." Lily said her eyes looking slightly glazed. "They are most definitely not all like that."

As they were exiting the theater, when most of them had recovered their senses enough to speak again, Lily's dad asked, "So would you like to go get some food? That popcorn didn't fill me up enough."

"It's probably because your mouth was open through the whole movie in astonishment instead of to eat." Lily teased.

"Don't pretend you weren't going 'whoah' every two seconds." Her dad shot back.

"Dinner sounds great." Jason agreed smiling at their exchange. "Where would you like to go?"

They ended up at an Italian place near the theater.

The moment they sat down Sirius exclaimed, "I cannot believe that Obi Wan Kenobi died in the end! I mean who just gives up like that?"

"He did it for a good reason mate. Self-sacrifice for the greater good, I could see Dumbledore doing something just like it." James put in.

"All I know is that that Solo fellow knew what's what. He was definitely my favorite." Sirius went on.

"Of course he was your favorite," James smirked, "You two have the same views on life."

As the two dads also got into a conversation about the movie between them Sirius leaned forward and whispered, "You know I was counting them up and there were at least three times that I could have made a _'that's what she said' _joke."

Lily burst out laughing and had to grab onto James for support.

"You have got to be kidding me. Those were the most amazing special effects I've ever seen in my life and all you can think about are the lines in the film that could be interpreted as sexual."

James grinned.

"I know one. _'Put that thing away before you get us all killed!'_" He supplied causing the others to laugh outrageously.

"How about, _'You came in that thing, you're braver than I thought!'_" Sirius put in snorting.

"Here's one, '_You've got something jammed in here real good.'_" Remus added in one of his rare moments of immaturity.

"Hey Moony how'd you like the one where he says _'Get in there you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!'_"

The four of them had completely lost it by that point and were in a state of complete hysterics when the waitress came over to take their orders.

They continued to talk about the movie until the food came.

"Oh Merlin this looks delicious." Sirius exclaimed excitedly as he prepared to dig in to his pasta.

Lily's dad chuckled. "That's a common expression among you all I see. It's not just Lily that says it."

"Was that strange for you?" James' dad asked. "Having to learn all about the differences between the world your daughter had entered into and the one she had grown up in?"

"Oh very strange, but we had always known Lily was different. She used to do such odd things as a child. At first we were frightened by it. But after a time it was merely a matter of trying to keep her happy so that anything that was breakable in the house wouldn't explode." Harold chuckled.

"That would be odd. With our kind it's more expected for those things to happen. Our parents would start to worry if things like that didn't occur." James put in.

"Well we were certainly pleased when Lily received her letter and we learned that she wasn't alone in her abilities. We were happy that she finally had a place to fit in. It would have been difficult for her to move through our world and feel as if she belonged."

Lily broke in frowning, "You don't think I would have been okay if I had chosen not to go to Hogwarts? You think I would have felt out of place?"

"Yes I do. You would have never truly found your purpose in life. It's important to feel as if you belong in the world in which you live. You were always so different, so special. Your mother and I used to make ourselves sick worrying you would be unhappy." He answered, then smiled. "You know I remember one time we were watching you and Tuney play in the park. You couldn't have been more than six or so. You were swinging on the swings and going far too high for your own good, when all of a sudden you just leapt off of it and propelled yourself into the air. Nearly frightened the wits out of your mother and I. But you just, sort of…floated back down and landed right on your feet." He chuckled at the memory. "Then of course we were worried that Petunia would try to mimic you and get hurt."

"I used to do that all the time in that park." She replied recalling the memory herself.

They talked more about this and that and James got to see how Lily interacted with her father. They were obviously close and he was glad that she had supportive parents like he did. The conversation moved from the differences between the wizarding world and the Muggle one to the differences between the wizarding world and that of the movie they had just seen.

"All I'm saying is," Sirius went on, "it would be a simple matter to turn my wand into a light-saber! I mean a few charms and a little transfiguration and…"

"What in the blazes would you do with a light-saber?" Remus asked incredulously.

"Lots of things. It would definitely make duels more interesting. I'm also incredibly jealous of all the wandless magic that they can do. We don't explore that aspect of our magical education enough at Hogwarts." Sirius added thoughtfully.

"That's because it's difficult. Most wizards need their wand to do any magic at all." Remus replied gravely.

"Lily can do things without hers." Mr. Potter broke in suddenly.

Four sets of interested eyes turned toward him and Lily looked down shyly.

"What do you mean?" James questioned curiously.

"Well when she was little it was slowing herself down on the swings, or making flowers bloom in her hand, simple things. As she got older it was levitating items down from high shelves or turning lights on and off without using the switch." Her dad explained oblivious to how rare what he was describing actually was. "She still does it at school sometimes she says. Isn't that right Lily?"

"Um, yes…sometimes." She said blushing at their scrutiny. "Just to see if I'm still capable of it."

"That's remarkable." Mr. Potter said sounding impressed. "I've known very few wizards who can do anything of the sort unless they are emotionally lashing out. Dumbledore for one can do many things without his wand. It's very impressive."

Lily looked rather uncomfortable with how the conversation was centered on her magical abilities and surprisingly it was Sirius who took pity on her.

"So if we gave Lily a light-saber and a robe she could be the Luke to my Obi-wan!" He exclaimed excitedly.

"I thought we had just established that you were like Han Solo." Remus said raising an eyebrow at him.

"I'm a very versatile bloke Moony. Don't try and Gnomehole me!"

"Gnomehole?" Lily asked chuckling.

"He heard me say pigeonhole the other day and he decided it was stupid because pigeons don't live in holes." Remus supplied.

"Well that's not exactly…"

"Ya and Gnomes do!" Sirius supplied. "So it makes a lot more sense!"

Lily looked questioningly to James who just shrugged not really sure and shook his head. Sometimes it was just best to let Sirius go.

L&JL&JL&JL&JL&J

**Sorry to anyone who thinks I updated again! That error at the end was driving me CRAZY! I just had to fix it!**


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